Assisted Conception (and all the bits that go with it) volume 9

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A new snug for us AC ladies

Had first appt today ladies at possible egg-sharing clinic. Not sure what I was expecting, but I don't feel over-excited about this one. The consultant we saw had the personality of a wet dishcloth! And the receptionists were professional enough but not over friendly. I just didn't feel very encouraged or enthused. But perhaps I'm over analysing it. A tad annoying was that I ran all over town beforehand, collecting any copies of any previous results at all from old gp's etc, as I had been told previous results would be accepted. But then told upon arrival that they would want to do all testing over again. I can understand that they need to do the chromosome testing etc, but I thought most of the others would have been okay. So hmmmmmm.

On a good note I learnt more about the programme and if we did want to go ahead, and all tests results were okay, then we could possibly only need to wait 6-8 weeks before we could start a treatment cycle. So that's great.

Got another appt at different clinic next week, so I want to wait to see what they are like.

Thanks everyone for your support with the crazy bureaucracy of the 40 day wait. Seems like I'm just going to have to sit it out, but if all clinics want to do their own tests anyway then it's not such a big deal. Will still be good to get the records once they finally arrive. Put the request in about 10 days ago now.

pocket I am really sorry to hear that you need to go for that. I hope you get your appointment soon.

Lissy I too love your updates. Really gives us hope. Keep us informed of bub's arrival.

Love and waves to all oxox

Sunny sorry your appt today didn't go as you'd hoped. But great that you have another planned - I phoned lots before making my choice. Do be picky - you'll have to make a few visits and spend time with these people so it needs to feel right. Great about the 6-8 week. Maybe we can be cycle buddies!!

josie how did your appt go?

AFM am seeing consultant tomorrow afternoon so will better understand procedure and timings - praying for early next week to get it out of the way (also have a few nice things planned for feb as don't want this to get in the way).

Hi to everyone xxx

Sunny that?s ridiculous! You?d think we?d be used to waiting for things by now . Maybe if you put up a bit of a fuss and make them realise why time is important they could rush it along for you?

Pocket sorry you have to go for the op, hope it?s not as bad as you thing

Weller so sorry to hear the IVF was abandoned.

My appt didn't go well. We're starting ivf in the next couple of weeks, get my meds a week tomorrow, but she said not to get our hopes up. She doesn't think I'll respond to the drugs very well and if there's only 2 or 3 follies after stimulation as she suspects, they won't go ahead with the egg removal and basically that's it for us I'm absolutely gutted

Oh Josie I'm so sorry. please don't give up hope yet. See how your appt goes. Btw would you consider egg donor?

No Pocket we've discussed it and we've agreed we'd rather adopt than have a baby that's DHs and not mine. I'm trying to stay positive but it's so hard, especially when my best mate is telling me all about her 20 day scan when she found out she's having a healthy baby girl We'll deal eventually, just gotta stay strong and not give up yet

Hello I was actually on this thread a good old while back, and then RL got in the way. I have been lurking for a while now, but just wanted to post after seeing your post Josie. I'm so sorry that you've had bad news, I really do feel for you. You didn't mention what your AMH result was - I'm only wondering because I have very low fertility and was prepared not to respond to the drugs, but managed to get 8 eggs at collection. You just never know. I don't want to get your hopes up, but thought you might like to know that - I was searching the net like a madwoman for a glimmer of hope when we got my results.
I haven't managed to get a BFP (yet) but am still hopeful, especially when I read fabulous stories of success like Teds
Can I ask which meds you'll be taking? Good luck x

Off to bed now but hello to everyone else, especially Italian if you're lurking

Hi knowledgeable ladies! Can I join you and ask some questions?

Been ttc for probably 5 years now been in and our of gynae, endo and gp offices and have just had 4th IUI which I am 7 days past- suspect is another failure

Anyway consultant saw us after third and said still unexplained with slight male factor and referred us for ivf but can finish the IUI that are already budgeted for (we're NHS still)

I've had test on test but never any immune testing- how did you ladies get them?

Sorry to waffle

Josie for a start, as monkeybumsmum says, you might well produce more than 2 or 3 eggs anyway. But if you don't, I'd ask why they wouldn't go ahead with egg removal? That seems ridiculous. It only takes one and at your age your eggs are probably pretty good quality. I met someone at ARGC in her 40s, who only produced one follicle, they retrieved it and she got pregnant.

Hello slightlybabycrazed, I only know a bit about immunes testing in London, so if you're based elsewhere this'll be useless! I'm at ARGC where they do IUI, IVF and test/treat the whole immunes side of things. They're very expensive, but they get fantastic results. The Lister also do IVF and test/treat immunes, although if you are having NHS IVF, you can just have the immune side dealt with by the Lister. Also there are two Drs who have good reputations re immunes, Dr Gorgy and Dr Ndukwe. If you google both of them with 'immune testing' they'll come up. One works with a clinic that does IVF. The other works independently and you could get your immune testing from him, while having IVF elsewhere. In your initial consultation anywhere they'd run through what they were going to test, why and how they could treat it depending on the results. The Dr who started believing that women suffering recurrent miscarriages, or who had difficulties getting pregnant when there were no apparent problems, could achieve a successful pregnant if they had immune treatment was called Dr Alan Beer. He wrote a book called 'Is your body baby friendly'. It might be worthwhile you having a look at that if you fancy reading up on it.

If you're based somewhere else, or have other questions, ask away. Someone will be along soon who can help!

Josie- I'm so sorry to hear your news. I'm all for being realistic, but I think it's horrible the way your doctor spoke to you. I once went for a consultation after my first two cycles, and the doctor said "What will you do a couple years down the road after four or five failed cycles?" Suffice it to say, I didn't use that doctor. I think there's something to be said for optimism. Is this the only clinic you can go to? There are so many success stories of BFP's in women who have low AMH.

Hiya Babycrazed. I chose ARGC in London as my clinic because they were so extremely thorough, and that included immunes testing. I know the Lister does it as well, and a few others. Depending on your area, I think it's a question of asking around.

monkeybum! Where ya been? Hope all has been well with you...

Thanks to all of the lovely ladies for your encouragement and support. February 20 will be here before I know it, if I don't go sooner! Last day of work tomorrow FOR REAL! Have very little shopping left to do, so at least I feel somewhat prepared if it all goes down sooner rather than later. Now just coping with late pregnancy aches and pains...

Afternoon ladies, hope all is okay in our little snug.

Popping in the say josie chin-up - I know it's tough but until you give your body a go with the drugs then you can't really know what will happen. One of the other ladies I'm hanging out with on the twins ante-natal thread is someone I cycled with on the other ICSI/IVF thread and like me, she just got 3 eggs but now has 2 of them growing in her tummy. Also, if I remember rightly, beginnings didn't respond at all on her first cycle but then on her successful cycle got 9 or 10 eggs I think. So there are loads of positive stories out there.

What's also worth remembering is that once they get eggs out of you, all the statistics about high FSH or low AMH don't matter anymore. My clinic had a calculator that looked pretty bleak when they put my hormone info in but then when they looked at results for people aged 33 with 4 or 5 eggs the bfp rate was about 30% and for a 33 who had a blasto transfer (still a possibility even with a low yield) then the stats were about 60% bfp - all the other stuff didn't matter anymore.

As you go through stims remember there is plenty of time for the drugs dosage to be altered to give you every chance of responding. Also, I've gone to ET with only 3 follicles one time and with only 3 big follicles (and two littlies) both time. That isn't great but both me and the doctors thought there was nothing to lose from giving it a go. Finally, although it's difficult, remember that even if your results were better, for most people, IVF might not work first time. Dig deep and get ready for the journey. I know that's easy for me to say from my position, but if I'd have listened to the consultant we saw after our failed cycle then I wouldn't have the happiness that I currently have. The expression 'scraping the bottom of the barrel' still hurts a lot but now I can think, 'Well, mate, I scraped it damn harder than you were prepared to and I bloomin glad I did!'

Thank you for the info, am
South East so could do london if the local NHS isn't successful. I will do some of the suggested reading/research and see what I can do. In all my months of trying (and in fact life) never even had the faintest sniff of a bfp so defo think my body is working against me!

Just trying to catch-up with everyone else's news too.

weller am so sorry about your news but you haven't let anyone down . I don't know whether there is anything in my post to josie that may help. Also, if you are still in NHS hands I would discuss with them what different protocols or drug regimes they might be prepared to try - if you have the funding I figure you might as well use it. If you're self-funding and anywhere near London I'd really recommend the Lister. They were fab in my experience and I never felt inadequate just because my body wouldn't do quite what it was supposed to xxx.

mojangled am so very sorry about the crap weekend and all the what-ifs. Be kind to yourself and give yourself time to work out what to do next x.

sunnyg boo for rubbish clinic delay. It might be worth hunting out the email of the clinic director and complaining. I did this at Guys when we were offered our follow-up appointment three months after our failed cycle and got an almost instant response and an appointment about two days later.

Pocket so very sorry about the continued rubbishness. Hope today's appointment has gone okay and you have a date for early next week at the latest xx.

Hi monkey really hope you get your bfp soon and hi to slightly too - 'fraid I don't know anything about immunes but hopefully others can help.

lissy whoop for 20 Feb - that's very exciting news! lucy - like you I'm hoping that no news is good news.

Hugs to bugsy and any others ladies I've missed.

Finally, italian I miss you too! Really hope all is well with you.

Thanks Teds that was really inspirational. Up to now I have gone along with everything the clinic have said but now I'm thinking I'm going to have to fight with them. If I don't produce many folies, they won't do it, but why not, it's worth it even with one. And even if I don't respond to the first cycle I might respond to the second one so it's worth trying again. I think I might have a fight on my hands if I'm strong enough to do it

found you! marking place and back tomorrow to read and post update re AMH results.....

Just popping in quickly to say how sorry I was to see your news weller. It must be very difficult, so I hope you have plenty support in RL.

sunnyg glad you have the second appointment so you can compare. FX you have a more positive experience with them.

josie hang in there darling. Like others here have shown - it ain't over till its over - and until such time there is always hope.

pocket hope your operation goes well.

lissy we're all excited for you and hope you keep coming back with your updates as often as you can.

No updates from me. Clinic clearly lost my request for call back as have heard nothing and haven't had the time to chase them. Will do so on Friday

Jodie do you know what your follicle Amtrak count is? Are you happy with the clinic can you move ? Are you funded sorry brain is scrambled if so a cycle only counts once collection I think. Yes be prepared to fight I know care GDP do not like cycles with only 3 but can sometimes be persuaded

Silly phone antral count

Hello and welcome to monkeybumsmum and slightlybabycrazed and big wave to all you other lovely ladies.

Saw my new gynie consultant today, he was lovely and assured me that 'prodedure' was very minor, would take about 15 mins and i'd be in/out in 6 hours - and only need a day or two to recover. So i'm booked in next Wednesday early morning. DP's promised to be with me on the day and to look after me the following day which is comforting.

Thanks Lucy and Bugsy for your words of reassurance, its been massively helpful and totally concurred by consultant. I shall be holding all of your virtual hands next week when i go under.

Lots of love and here's to the start of some good news for us all - been too little good stuff on our thread lately.

xxx

Bugsy I haven't got a clue I'm afraid (I'm not very helpful am I!) We're going through the NHS, there's no way we can afford private. The clinic have good results apparently but I have to say the dr hasn't been the most sympathetic. She said we need to prepare ourselves for disappointment, and that the chances are I won't get pregnant (I should have asked if she meant with IVF or in general!) but the time before that she was really good and very hopeful, saying that it only takes one egg to make a baby so I felt better after that appt, but not after this one. Maybe if she believes it only takes one egg, she'll be more willing to try even if I don't produce many follicles? I've written a list of questions for the nurse next week anyway and that's one of them

Has anyone on this thread had/is having IVF? I'd love some more insight into what you actually go through, both emotionally and physically. I know the info tells me about what side effects I can expect, and what the procedures are, but I'd love to talk to someone who's experienced it first hand.

Forgot to say Pocket hope it all goes ok next week.

Still here a bit ladies but a bit like the first trimester it's all I can do to get to work, get home, eat, and sleep!!

Josie, Teds has a great memory. I didn't respond on my first cycle and then had the lovely experience of a consultant actually shrugging as he told me that I would probably never be successful and that WHEN the next cycle didn't work, I should move to egg donation. I'm 28 weeks today and they did get 10 eggs at my last cycle however only 6 were good.

PM me if you want and i'd be happy to chat about experiences and see if there's any other way I can help. I've had four cycles of ivf, three fresh (including the failure) and one frozen.

Thinking of and watching everyone else. lissy you're so close!!!

Good morning to all :)

So sorry to read that things have not worked out for some of you :(

Re ERPC and natural miscarriage, I had an ERPC after my MMC and can only reiterate that it was over and done with very quickly and afterwards I felt as if it was a fresh start. I too bled very little but that first 24 hours I stayed in bed and rested. My mum came up to help look after me whilst DP was keeping DS entertained. A friend also had procedure a couple of months later but she didn't rest for that first day and took a very long time to get back to normal..... I personally felt I couldn't wait for nature to take its course when I had a child to look after so that option wasn't the right one for me.

So AFM the results of the AMH came by letter yesterday

A result of

Thanks Lexie for your advice re resting after erpc, I will make sure I do nothing for a day or two.

I'm afraid I can't help re amh - mine was so low at 0.07, we had no option other that donor egg. But hopefully someone else knows more

Hi to everyone xxx

Lexie is your birth year in your name? In which case you're just a little bit older than me (I'm 40, 41 this Summer). My AMH was 2.8 (in the 'low' category) and my FSH was between 8 - 12. AMH is only an indicator of egg reserves, not quality, and FSH levels indicate how 'loudly' your brain has to 'shout' at your ovaries at the beginning of every month to get them going. So with any luck your egg quality is fine, and you will just need a larger dose of medication to get your ovaries to produce more than the usual one a month. There's lots you can do to ensure your egg quality is as good as can be, stuff you've probably been doing already but things like no alcohol, no caffeine, organic where possible, not processed if possible etc etc. There are also some good supplements you can take (I used fertility plus by marilyn glenville for natural health practice). I got pregnant naturally (having had a bit of help with my immunes - are you planning on having them tested? My immune issues only started since trying for another child, all was fine with DS) while waiting for IVF to start, so with our ages and results being similar, I'm sure the same could happen for you.

I'm writing this in a bit of a rush, I'm sorry, but if there's anything else you want to know please just ask away or PM me if you'd prefer.

Today I am so far mostly feeling:

A little sad
A little scared
A little worried
THAT I WILL NOT BE BEATEN

Hugs to everyone. We truly are the strongest women in the world