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Conception

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Who is joining me on the hideous 2ww?

998 replies

LauraM20 · 05/01/2012 08:14

Hey All!
Im currently on CD 20 so around 8-10 days until the AF arrives or I can test :D Just thought there may be some others that are waiting and driving themselves crazy! Thought we could hopefully share our BFP within the next few weeks, and keep each other sane! :D

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bettybat · 06/01/2012 15:30

Hugs to all of you :) This position we find ourselves in is odd...but I'm thankful I can join in the chat with of you.

I can feel AF on her way. I've felt mildly nauseous these last few days so I took a test...maybe it's too early (I think I have six days to go) but it was negative.

It's so hard not to assign body differences to the hope.

Laura, I feel for you - I'm back at work next week and a colleague, and good friend, is on her last week before maternity leave. It's so hard, I can't stand being around her at all but I'm forcing myself to organise a mini baby shower for her. It's not her fault but all the same, I just want her well away from me :( I think it will be easier when she's gone.

I hate all this. I've turned into a horribly jealous and negative person.

LauraM20 · 06/01/2012 15:37

Bettybat I said exactly the same thing to a friend the other day, I hate the way I have become so jelous of everyone! It's really kind of you to do her a baby shower tho-it will be your turn hopefully soon!!
I feel abit niggly in my tummy today but AF not due for another 6 days so I think I'm doing my crazy symptom spotting again! At least we can all be crazy together! Trying my best to wait and test but suspense is killing me! No point in me testing now.....il just be wasting £10.00!!! X

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browneyesblue · 09/01/2012 00:49

How is everyone? I'm twitching away here - itching to test even though it's far too early. I'm trying to distract myself by working, but the majority of my mind is elsewhere.

I understand what people are saying about jealousy/feeling negative - it is so hard not to feel that way sometimes :( I hope nobody minds if I share a bit of my story here.

I have 2 very good friends who both have sons the same age as my DS - they are the reason that we met. Anyway, it turns out that we have all been TTC for a while (we didn't sit down and discuss it - we just figured it out after a while!). I didn't think anything of it other than a vague "wouldn't it be nice if we all ended up having a second set of DC's of a similar age", and certainly didn't feel any pressure at the time. However, I am a bit ashamed to admit that since my MC I do feel the pressure a bit more, especially since my friends knew/know I'm trying. A bit bonkers really, but maybe it will strike a chord with someone else. It took me a while to conceive the first time, and I am over 35, so I was amazed when I found myself pregnant after just a few months of trying, and saddened when I miscarried.

My friends rallied round and were amazing. I was in hospital for almost a week, and between the two of them they looked after my DS while my husband visited me and went to work. I can't describe the relief and gratitude I felt at knowing he was in good hands. DH and I don't have family close by, so knowing DS was happy and well cared for was such a weight of my mind.

Because I knew by then that they had both been TTC, I really worried about how it would make me feel if/when one or both of them would conceive, and about making them feel uncomfortable around me. I decided in the end to just tell them that although what had happened was hard for DH and I, we hadn't given up hope. I also said that if/when they became pregnant, I would love the chance to share in their excitement, and that I would hate for them to feel uncomfortable telling me. There was a bit of bravado in there, but 2 months after my MC one of my friends did get her BFP. I am genuinely thrilled for her, but I would be lying if I said that I wasn't a bit jealous too. It was only I found out that she had had a bit of a bleed that I realised that being jealous would only hurt me, and our friendship. The most important thing is that she has a healthy pregnancy, followed by a healthy baby.

As for me, it's early days (again). I'm trying my hardest to stay postive. There's no reason that I know of that it can't happen for me, so I'll keep popping the folic acid and keep my fingers crossed that someday soon I get my own BFP.

If any of you ladies have managed to make it to the end of this essay, then please know I'm thinking positively for all of us. I hope that someday soon, we will all get the result we are waiting for :)

PS - £10 for a test!! I buy the Asda own brand tests, which I'm sure are not only less than £4 for 2 tests, but are also more sensitive than most of the main brands (15mIU/mL)

desperateoldie67 · 09/01/2012 09:21

AF got me this morning Sad.

Off to the docs this week for me to see if I can get some blood tests to see what's going on.

Hope other people are having better luck.

Iheartpasties · 09/01/2012 09:28

Hi,

Browneyesblue, it's lovely that you can be so honest here, i think it can help to get a few things off your chest sometimes. I'm sorry you had a misscarriage I can't imagine the heart ache that must cause, but you must have fantastic friends if they looked after you little one for you. It's hard when you don't have family nearby but having good friends really makes up for that sometimes :)

I also do not have family nearby, and I'm so glad for the friends I have made in my mum's groups.

I think when you are ttc and you see a pregnant woman it's understandable to feel a bit green with envy and jealousy etc.

I think this month is a wash out for me, but hey we'll see.

wifey6 · 09/01/2012 09:40

Hi ladies...can I please wait here with you all? I am on my 3rd cycle off the pill but due to health issues...this month be the only valid one out of them. I am keeping track of my ovulation etc via an online tracker...not sure how accurate it is but if it is right then the last two nights have been crucial. Fingers crossed for all you ladies waiting & good luck next month to others who have had meant AF turn up. Smile

IslaMann · 09/01/2012 12:38

I'm currently 4 days late - but too scared to POAS. Scared because I've been TTC since April, and last ovulation cycle was the only one where other events took over and SWI didn't really happen!
PLEASE hold my hand!

LauraM20 · 09/01/2012 12:52

Isla, I can't believe you haven't tested yet!!! I can barely wait unt my period arrives!! Good luck and keep us posted!

Desperateoldie, so sorry AF appeared, I hope everything goes ok at the doctors, only another month or two and I shall be there too :-(

Browneyes, thanks for your lovely story it's nice to know that everyone gets jelous and I'm not a mean person! When are you testing and wifey6 when are you testing? AF is due sometime between thur and Saturday so I'm guessing i will prob test first thing on sat if it hasn't arrived (zero willpower I know) have had a cramping tummy for a couple of days, seems abit early for my period but who knows probably my body playing tricks!! X

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wifey6 · 09/01/2012 17:01

Isla....can't believe you haven't tested yet..you have more will power than I would! Keep us posted! LauraM20...AF due 21st so hoping to test if late.

Winnie81 · 09/01/2012 17:52

Please may I join?

I am TTC no2 and believe that I have just started my 2ww!

Browneyes I can relate to your story although my situation is quite different. I feel emotional (although I dont show it) around family with their children. My ds1 sadly passed away in 2007 and when we are around family with their similar aged children its very difficult sometimes.

Isla I dont think I could wait that long, I will probably test as soon as I can!!

Im crossing my fingers for everyone x

IslaMann · 09/01/2012 19:04

BFN Sad

LauraM20 · 09/01/2012 19:39

Oh no :( maybe your hormone levels are not high enough yet? Are your cycles normally quite regular? X

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browneyesblue · 09/01/2012 20:46

I hope the doc can give some advice and get you started on a few tests desperateoldie. If nothing else, hopefully it will put your mind at rest. DH and I were referred for tests before DS, and after a year of trying it actually felt good to be doing something, to be a bit proactive.

It does help to let it all out on here. Sorry you haven't got your BFP yet IslaMann - maybe test again in a couple of days if AF doesn't arrive?

Like some of you have also said, I find it really hard to wait to test. I am CD 23 and my cycle is usually about 30 days. I want to try and wait until Sat before testing, but I'm not sure I can hold out that long! I'm 8 DPO (using OPKs) so nothing would show up yet anyway.

I've started using an online tracker too wifey6 - I find it really useful to keep things straight. Otherwise I find myself obsessively trying to remember dates, times etc.

Best of luck everyone :)

JNO18 · 09/01/2012 21:30

Can I come and join you?

According to my CBFM I ov'd on Sunday so I'm twiddling my thumbs for the next two weeks. DH is away on a course until Weds so trying to keep myself busy, having been varnishing our new doors tonight!

Good luck lovely ladies

dontcarehow · 10/01/2012 12:11

I'm joining. Even though I don't know if I ov'd this month at all. Assuming that it did I should be due around 22nd.

Anyway, Even though I got really excited about a bit of spotting the other day (surely its ovulation bleeding please please please!), I'm now feeling totally negative as I don't have any symptoms at all. I know my body pretty well and I'm always aware of the slightest change (ooh I feel a bit thirsty, maybe I'm pregnant!! ooh that was a weird dream, maybe I'm pregnant!and so on) but there's nothing going on. I know its ridiculous as I probably didn't even ovulate, and even if I did its only about 2 days since so I wouldn't be getting any symptoms anyway. but still. I'm going to be in a straight jacket by the end of the 2ww!

bettybat · 10/01/2012 12:48

Really sorry to those of you who have had BFN's this week.

Isla - have you tested yet??

I am about 2 days away from when I think AF should arrive. I'm getting the usual "drip" sensation (sorry if waaaaay TMI!). I could just cry my heart out, right here at my desk.

Yesterday, pregnant colleague and colleague with toddler sat either side of me, discussing everything baby-related. I put my headphones in but I still knew they were discussing being pregnant, having babies. I went outside, phoned my husband, and cried. Well - more of a meltdown, really :(

I felt like screaming, please just fuck off, away from me. It's not fair, none of it is fair. I was in complete meltdown mode. I remember when pregnant colleague was TTcing - she burst into angry tears because an older colleague, who was single, was considering IVF and lone parenting. She felt older colleague had no right to do any such thing. Aside from the dubious nature of that, I talked her down off that particular ledge. She knows I too am now TTCing. Doesn't she remember the awful, irrational, terrible envy? Can't she have a shred of sensitivity?

bettybat · 10/01/2012 12:51

Isla, I'm so sorry - in my mania, I hadn't read the thread properly :( Hugs, and much luck for next month.

dontcarehow · 10/01/2012 13:01

I know how you feel betty, saw my pregnant friend who is due in a couple of weeks at the weekend. All we talked about was pregnancy, labour, baby's room, etc. She knows that me and my other friend are both desperately TTC. I don't blame her at all, she has been good about it for the whole time, its just that now its so close she's nervous. But I can't cope with it! I'm torn between wanting to be there for my friend and not wanting to be anywhere near her. This is crazy

LauraM20 · 11/01/2012 09:07

Hey! How is everyone? Only a couple more days waiting for me cd27, cycle is normally 28-30 days, glad the waiting will soon be over snd also almost feel abit excited at this time during my cycle with all the what ifs!! I too am surrounded by pregnancy, 3 in my teamof 9 at work, best friend and dh best friends wife, it's really difficult to try and be interested when your overcome with jealousy, but I do love my friends dearly so am equally as happy!! It's when the girls at work say "aren't you having any" I want to shout and swear! Anyone else close to testing or have any news?!

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kalidasa · 11/01/2012 10:17

I gave in and tested first thing this morning (11DPO of a 16 day LP so too early I know!). Definitely negative. I am really quite unwell at the moment, we've just moved house and I'm meant to be traveling to Austria to give a presentation on Friday. I just want to know if I can take any drugs to survive the journey!

Hope everyone else is surviving.

bettybat · 11/01/2012 11:18

I tested yesterday, two days before AF. Not really sure why I bothered! I seem to have this unnerving belief that contrary to ALL the evidence like...oh I don't know, AF signs and 4 gazillion BFN's....there's still hope I might be pregnant.

I have hot sweats and flushes, dizziness, feeling sick and bile rising in my throat in the morning, but it must be all phantom symptoms, right?!

I'm sticking fingers up to the whole things, until next week - when it's time to start again Grin

I think the most irritating thing about this whole process is that AF is more annoying then ever Wink I mean, she was a pain in the backside before....now I'd like to chuck her off a cliff. Can you tell I'm due? Haha.

But I did buy two books - Taking Charge of Your Fertility, and the Continuum Concept - which DH is really into. So reading those books together makes it exciting and induces warm and fuzzy feelings.

Hope everyone is OK.

Winnie81 · 12/01/2012 19:14

Ok so this 2ww is a complete nightmare!
I think I'm only 2/3 DPO on a 33 ish day cycle. Arrrghh how am I gonna last???

However have just been to docs to get more of my heartburn tablets and had a quick discussion about ttc. I can take the tablets even when I get a BFP and I can continue going to the gym etc!

How is everyone else getting on??

LauraM20 · 12/01/2012 19:57

Well im on CD 28, AF expected between cd 28-30, did early test today and got BFN, so just a case of waiting for AF to arrive now :( so back to the beginning for me, more waiting and probably disappointment (all positivity went out the window today im afraid) This TTC malarky is SO hard, I cant believe I ever used contraception!!

Good Luck with your waiting Winnie I have my fingers crossed you get you BFP, good to know about the gym as I was wondering that too!

Anyone else have any updates? xx

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bettybat · 12/01/2012 20:15

Laura - I'm pretty much identical to you. If I am on a 28 day cycle, AF is due today. Last three cycles since coming off the pill have been 25, 30 and 27. So I'm really not sure if I am late or not :( Did two tests today, both negative.

This is like torture. I keep going to the loo to check. I usually get a sensation when AF makes an appearance, and I'm getting that but nothing. I literally cannot take this Grin

But....I have been really ill these last few months. Headaches, hot flushes, cheek burning. I kept going to the doctor, who terrified me by mentioning early menopause (FUCK!) but she did hormone tests, and I have periods so you know...She concluded it must be work stress.

Anyway! My DH is a personal trainer, and I went to a session yesterday morning before work. I was dying from hot flushes on the train to the gym, and felt faint and dizzy. DH's head coach was concerned, and later on DH called me to say the head coach has a client who is a leading women's health specialist in Belsize Park - he specialises in fertility, menopause, hormone stuff, etc and he arranged for me to a have consultation with this doctor in exchange for my DH giving this guy a few PT sessions. I could have wept from the kindness, and also the opportunity for someone to tell me what the hell is going on in my body.

Re gymming - on the advice of DH and his colleagues, I've been kettle belling and swimming as usual. Tuesday morning I was practicing free standing hand stands at 7am Grin

bettybat · 12/01/2012 20:22

Forgot to say, sorry, feel all the other usual signs. Pressure in belly, bloating, mild cramping, sore breasts. Also have an extremely dry throat and a weird back of throat sensation like there's an air bubble in my esophagus (sp?). Felt sick and dizzy all day - well more like slight spinning.

It's hell because I don't even know if I am late.

I know exactly what you mean, Laura, about contraception. Stupid AF, stupid belly, stupid contraception, stupid everything - hahaha!

Hope everyone else is OK. Good luck Winnie...when will the hellish 2WW be roughly over for you?

Laura - here's to AF not putting in an appearance. Crossing all my fingers and toes for you!