Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling or settle yourself down in our padded cell. All welcome! (Part 19)

[Poppyjen]

Another new thread for some more serious metalling - we really are a chatty lot!

Here's to making it through the WTF cycle(s), metalling* like a teenager from the early '90s in the 2WW, BFP colds and other classic symptom spotting and hiding in the (nice and comfy) padded cell post BFP

If you have miscarried and are ready to TTC again, come and join us!

• For those currently wondering what our mosh pit antics have to do with ttc post MC, a fabulous typo in an earlier thread resulted in "mentalling" becoming known as "Metalling" - a far more fitting expression I am sure you will agree!

Welcome!

Thanks everyone for the "when can I try again" help. I just need to steel myself to forget the last few weeks and dare to even think about it again.

Ridiculously, I am feeling relieved that there is absolutely no chance of being pregnant at the moment because then I don't have to worry so much about it and there is no chance of miscarrying when you're not pregnant.

I might have entirely lost my mind.

i have just written a massive long post and then MN logged me out AAAARRRGGGHHH

il try again in a minute

ok...so the gist of it was

jaffa GL for your results

misslaugh try access diagnostics for cheap and reliable service...(sound like their radio announcer)

murray hope you are doing ok in the run up to the appointment {{hugs}} and missC you too xx

i have been having some weird symptoms of something very heavy, sore (.)(.)s, heartburn, dizzy spells and low down pain WTF cycle really suits its name...

Thanks Moomins. Obviously that early on it can vary quite a lot; it's good to hear that relatively little bleeding can be normal.

Anyway, I'm on day 6 of my new cycle and feeling so much better. I went for a long swim today - usually I swim a lot but haven't for several weeks as I felt so unwell and we were moving house. The bleeding stopped a few days ago, my temps are coming down properly (now about at last month's cover line), I feel much more energetic and focused, and today I had some creamy cf, which is at exactly the normal time for me, so I'm hoping that I might have a nice straightforward cycle ahead of me.

Really feeling much more positive and in control. Also quite good news about my sister - probably a thyroid tumour which sounds bad but is apparently quite good, because most of them are fairly easy to treat.

Not sure if we're actually going to "try" this cycle or just "not avoid" for now, but I suppose we'll see how we feel.

Hope everyone else is doing OK.

So, I have bad news. The levels have risen from 500 to 700 in a week. I have been referred to the EPU for a scan and more tests. It is likely to be a miscarriage or worse, ectopic. I keep thinking, at least I am aware now, not like last time, but I am so very very sad.

Oh jaffa my love I'm so sorry it wasn't happier news. You know we're here for as much or as little support as you want/need...

Oh jaffa I am so so sorry, my heart is breaking for you. I am keeping everything crossed that it is not ectopic :(

kalidisa I too had an early mc and felt like you, like I did not deserve to be as sad as those who had lost babies later and whilst I do think the later it is the worse it is, I feel very real grief for the baby I lost in June even though it was so very early. I still think of its due date and what might have been and the fact I am not pregnant yet makes it harder to bear so please don;t feel like you are any less deserving of sympathy, as soon as we see that BFP it is a baby in my mind :(

Hello to all the newbies and I am so so rry for all of your losses. You have found the right place to share your trials and tribulations!

misscoffee thinking of you a lot expecially pre-appointment.

Thinks went a bit pear shaped for us last week as DH had a total melt down about TTC and having sex when he did not feel like. Sadly it lead to all sorts of horrible rows about he has hated trying for a baby, it has lead to nothing but misery and pain and he hates forced sex. We typically only do it at the weekends and on holiday so its going to be tough to see how on earth we are ever going to concieve but he was adamant he needed a break from the pressure. I have to say it left me feeling quite angry and resentful about all I have gone through and thinking he canlt want this as much as me. All a bit sad really. We are still 'trying' I suppose but in a lets see if it happens way.

So sorry jaffa x

Oh jaffa what horrible news. So sorry.

jaffa I'm so sorry {{{massive hugs}}}

very sorry to hear that Jaffa. Take care x

So sorry Jaffa..... Thinking of you xx

Jaffa thinking of you xxx

Oh Jaffa :( :( it's just not fair I'm so sorry. I have everything crossed that the process is easy for you whatever occurs, we'll be here for you whatever happens.

far I'm sorry about the DH trouble. Any chance of (at the risk of sounding cheesy) reconnecting as a couple and reminding yourself how fab each other is and how much you want to make a mini version of each other? Nothing too contrived, I find the happiest moments come by just turning off the telly and doing something random - like tomorrow night we're going to drive up onto the moor after dark and look for the northern lights, there'll be three of us giggling in the car and scoffing chip shop chips but you get the idea.

Hi ladies, sorry it's been a while just burying my head in the sand a bit I guess...

I just really wanted to send lots of hugs to Jaffa I am so very sorry to hear your news. I don't really know anything about the numbers and there's not much I can say but that is such a bugger and I am so sorry

Hello to the new ladies, as others have said so sorry you have to be here but it is a great place with some very positive stories to keep your spirits high during the sad times.

As for me, well I am 8+1 today and I have been feeling rotten for a good couple of weeks now. I feel very guilty for feeling low, I know I should feel very grateful for being in this position but I think I have a touch of the blues these past couple of days. Maybe it is just January....anyhoo DH and I have decided to sneak off to the coast for a night away next week while DS is with his grandparents. I am hoping this will re-charge my normal sunny self a bit!

Just popped on quickly but wanted to send huge hugs to jaffa so not the news you wanted from the docs really hope it doesn't turn out to be ectopic...thinking of you!

far DH and I had various conversations of a similar nature and also only usually manage to do it at weekends and holidays which is not v conducive for TTC! We were very very lucky that my ov turned out to be when we were on hols which is how beany came to be this time but I was starting to despair that with DH's shifts we would never catch an egg! I think the guys do find it hard to connect to the desperate need that we have inside and when we know when the right time is we just need it to happen iyswim. I had to promise DH not to insist we did it at silly o'clock in the morning after he'd been on a late shift for example but mainly I just had to try and chill out about it and not let on to him when the right time was to take the pressure off. Even the week we were on holiday I made a determined effort not to mention TTC and to try and relax. Think I've waffled away a bit there but hope you catch the drift of what I'm saying...

Right...must go in search of chocolate!!! I'll leave some virtual galaxy bars for you all here on the table by the mosh pit with a fresh pot of but I must get some of it in RL...such a sweet tooth at the moment!!

x-post poppy your sneaking away plan sounds like a good one! The grey wet weather and it still being cold and dark and January is not helping anyone at the moment I don't think!!

Also realised I forgot to great to see you back!!! Sorry about the bfn though!!

Sorry to hear your news jaffa, I hope you've got lots of support with you x

far I totally identify with the DH ishoos. They feel the pressure but not the same urge as we do. In our case we both end up a bit tetchy at the absolute worst time of the month which really does not help. On the upside, DH did have a touch of ED which somehow has not been a problem recently, so whatever the pressure, he is doing OK. On a few occasions when he did not want to perform he did manage a wank into a cup which I then squirted in with one of DS's old nurafen syringes! Not the same, but it took some pressure off him without me feeling we'd missed an opportunity. The whole process is a grind though, we have had some fun this month, but we'd hardly DTD at all since my BFP in October, so there was some novelty to it! I'm sure we'll feel differently in 6 months if we've not got a BFP by then...

so sorry to hear your news jaffa thinking of you {hugs} xx

Today we are having crumpets and aldi fake Cheerios for breakfast, and some coffee

Ive been having similar talks with dp. Am still waiting for AF to arrive,not feeling up to dtd at the mo and feeling fairly anxious about the whole situation. DP has taken this as a personal insult and we have ended up arguing over stupid things.

So, still no AF (was due 22nd) one v v v feint positive last night which could have been an evap line (although none of the other tests I've taken of this brand have developed an evap line) and the same again with fmu today. I daren't even hope I'm pregnant, at this point would rather AF arrived and I can start again next month. Anybody want to have a guess at what the hell is going on inside my uterus?!

Oh newton sounds to me like you are updiffed!

Thanks for your comments on the DHs, it makes me feel less alone as you just assume that everyone else's DHs are always bang up for it and participating in the whole sorry process! I agree with you regarding the urge, it feels almost pathological to me at the moment and a bit scary, having lived a logicial life, to be driven by something so primal now. We are talking at least which is a big improvement on last week.

poppy don;t feel guilty for feeling blue, your trip away sounds absolutely lovely!

Welcome back pebs sorry about the bfn but I hope you had a lovely relaxing time away with DH

jaffa any news? thinking of you lots

Oh jaffa i am so so very sorry, i am sending you all the and support you need. Remember we are all here for you.

xxx

newton are you saying you've had two BFPs? That means you are with child

Support from this end either way, your DP will come round.

I dont know coffee they are very very light. DP saw the one last night and agreed it was a line (not my imagination) they are cheapy ones so am going to go out later and splash out on an expensive one....which brand is best?? Superdrug?! I would have thought of AF is 2 days late, I'd be having bright pink screaming BFPs by now.