Freak Out Room For Those Newly Diffed Up After MC Part IX

[LAF77]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage and too nervous to move over the to pregnancy boards? Freaking out about spotting, cramping, symptoms (or lack there of) and nervously awaiting your first scan? Here is a lovely place for lot's of support, hand holding and problem sharing.

Courtesy of owlbooty here are the Ten Commandments of the Freak Out Room.

1. Thou shalt check thy knickers to the point of insanity until the baby actually arrives.
2. Thou shalt also check the loo roll post-wipeage (sorry, gross, I know)
3. Thou shalt bore thy physician and midwife to tears with the mentalling.
4. And thy husband/boyfriend/family/neighbour's cat.
5. Thou shalt obsess over the absence of symptoms.
6. And the presence of symptoms.
7. And the fluctuation of symptoms.
8. Thou shalt pee on a vast number of sticks and keep ClearBlue and First Response in business.
9. The day before any scan extreme mentalling is permitted without recourse to the Haddock.

10. Self-diagnosis with Dr Google is Forbidden.

The Haddock will be applied liberally to all transgressors.

See here for the previous thread

Excellent news LAF

Yay LAF

Great scan news

Hope I can graduate too next week...

Bl

Oops, meant to say brilliant news LAF, so pleased for you! And a boy! Boys are great!!

Great news LAF ! Team Blue (whoop!) and graduating too - whoop! (what did you graduate in?) Have you thought of any names?

laf Congrats!! Brilliant news!! Happy graduation to you and the little chap.

Congratulations laf :)

Hello everyone - can I join you? I had a mmc in October 2010 and am now updiffed again, hopefully 7 weeks today. Was trying the 'head in the sand' approach to being pg but am failing miserably so thought I'd come here for some freaking out with others! Had a bit of a panic yesterday when all my symptoms disappeared for about 24 hours, but today they've all come back with a vengeance. Next time I'll try to be more grateful that the morning sickness has temporarily gone! I've got a scan booked for next Saturday when I should be 8 weeks so fingers crossed it's good news then.

Welcome cat and congratulations - I think I managed the denial trick up until about 7 weeks. I also had my first scan at 8 weeks and was glad I'd waited til then as there's no denying it after that! Try and distract yourself with other things during the week.

Hi can I join you? 5+2 and freaking out. We have been ttc for 2 years, had a mc at 7 weeks, a clomid bfp which ended in tfmr at 13 weeks due to trisomy 21, 11mm nuchal and a very poorly baby.
This pg was conceived using array cgh ICSI which checks the chromosomes before embryo transfer.
So as you can imagine all very stressful and scary.
I am slightly worried that my bfps weren't that strong- got a 1-2 weeks at 17dpo and 2-3 weeks at 22dpo.
Have no symptoms like breast tenderness or nausea. Just a constant light brown discharge. Think that may be irritation from the progesterone pessaries.
We have a scan booked for 21/11 at 7+3 and if we get that far will have our nuchal with the fetal medicine consultant herself at 11 weeks. Want to avoid cvs/ amnio if possible as the array cgh showed normal chromosomes.
Sticky vibes to all xxx

congrats cat and blacktreacle. You'll find plenty of support in here, these are a loverly bunch of ladies :)

yippee for good scan news.

anyone else feeling brave enough to graduate??

Thanks for the welcomes digi and velvet!

Welcome blacktreaclecat - or should that be "miaow" from one cat to another! It sounds like you've been through a lot of stressful things over th last 2 years. Apart from slightly sore breasts I had no pg symptoms until 6 weeks, then they all kicked in at once. I've no experience of the conception indicator pg tests, but I have read lots of things on MN about people being warned against using them as they often seem to not correspond to the dates and understandably cause such a lot of stress and worry! It's good that the dates are moving in the right direction for you.

I've had the last week off work on annual leave and am a bit worried about going back tomorrow due to the morning sickness (which is just so wrongly named!!) When I need to be sick I'll need to run across the open plan office in front of everyone, make it through two swipe card access doors and hope that the one toilet we have is free, otherwise I have a flight of stairs to contend with too! I just can't see me making it in time and I really don't want people to guess that I'm pg in case it all goes wrong again.

Congrats cat and blacktreacle Welcome to the madhouse.

blacktreacle Don't worry at all about the timings on the cbdigi - they are notorious for scaring people. They cannot possibly be accurate for everyone as there are such ranges of hcg that are 'normal'. I was ttc for 7 years before I got my first bfp (mmc at 8 weeks) and then had a couple of rounds of ICSI (got pg with twins, lost them at 20 weeks in May) and then had another go and am currently 15 weeks with a singleton, so I know how scary it is. Have had no symptoms whatsoever with the twins or with this pg, so don't worry about lack of them. And if you've had cgh then you should be able to relax about the chromosomal abnormalities. I found the progesterone pessaries much easier up the other way, although I know that sounds icky! FX that everything works out for you.

cat Good luck with the scan next Saturday and FX that the morning sickness isn't too bad next week. I have lots of sympathy for people with morning sickness, although am actually slightly jealous as it is a reassuring symptom and having no symptoms at all is very worrying and freaked me out!

pie LAF meant she was graduating to the grads thread over in 'pregnancy' - people from here 'graduate' to there when they are ready to embrace the fact that they might actually end up with a baby and are no longer freaking out about the early pregnancy stuff that we are all panicking about over here.

Hi cats! Sorry to hear about your mmc. You are a week ahead of me, I feel like time is dragging by soooo slowly at the moment. I'm only 6 weeks so another fortnight to go before I can think about having a scan. I haven't even phoned my midwife yet incase I jinx things (they like to 'book' you in at 6 weeks here). I'm feeling nauseous most days but my boobs haven't changed size at all (cue freak outs!). My m/c happened last time at 7 weeks but they said the baby had stopped growing at 5/6 weeks which is where I am now so am really trying (but failing) not to panic!

Hi blacktreacle sorry to hear your story, fingers crossed this time is a big sticky bean! 2 weeks to go until your scan (similar to me, except I haven't actually booked one yet - I don't know if I will get a free on at the EPU because i've had a m/c before?). I have been staring at my boobs in the mirror but they haven't changed at all!

Thanks dachs - what an eejit I am! I do remember reading something about a graduate thread but didn't put the 2+2 together! How have you been since the cervical stitch?

I've been fine thanks pie. I was freaking out for about 3 days because i was bleeding, which I was warned would happen and was perfectly normal after the procedure, but it's still worrying! I had a few contraction like cramps as well, which really freaked me out, but everything seems to have settled down now. The next week and a half until my next appointment will really drag though - i am desperate to have another peek at the little bean.

It seems I've dropped off the thread so I'm popping back on to mark my place again and say hello!
LAF - brilliant news about the scan! I'm so pleased for you, and a boy, how lovely!
Welcome cat and black treacle - sorry to hear about your previous experiences but fingers crossed things will work out this time. The girls on here are a really supportive bunch.
cat - I was also trying the 'burying head in the sand' approach this time, but it's so hard. After my 8 week scan I found it even more difficult, so I hope your scan goes well as it is reassuring. Try not to worry too much about morning sickness at work - mine has come in waves but somehow I've managed to cope much better at work than the days I've been at home. Mind over matter? I'm not sure, but my job is very busy so I don't have much time to think about anything other than the task in hand!
I have my booking in appointment tomorrow, I'm just over 10 weeks now. I still have just under 3 weeks to wait for my next scan though, it seems like forever! I'll actually be about 13 weeks by the time it comes around.
Waves to everyone, I hope you're all well. x

I also wanted to ask you ladies about what I should be asking at the booking in appointment tomorrow? I've probably thought of lots of things over the last few weeks but I haven't written them down and now I can't remember them all!

I'm also concerned because I don't know a great deal about family history and I don't want to share the news for another few weeks so asking my mum and MIL is kind of out of the question. For those of you who have been in this situation, what did you do?

Hi Twitt and congratulations.

I didn't ask much at my booking in - the midwife basically told me everything I needed to know, she was very good.

Hello ladies :)

litlady and googie congrats on the scan news
LAF congrats on the scan and the graduation,well done,and a blue one-my favourite colour!
knitter can you already feel your bean?That's amazing!
sharon no news is sometimes a good news gentle haddock swing
dachs hope your bleeding has stopped
both cats hello and welcome,sorry for your previous sad experiences,unfortunately sometimes they bring the bad memories back but...this time WILL be different(my mantra)
twit they ask you about your families health like some abnormalities,TB,diabetes and stuff like that,ask your OH what's the deal in his family,as for your one-any chance to ask your sibling(if you have one)?

I had my scan today,my bean is bang on all dates,jumping like mad,heart beating and it was just sooo lovely to see it.Unfortunately it was too lively to allow the sonographer to measure the nuchal pad,so I'm back in 4 weeks time to get my bloods for Downs taken.Haven't got a clue why they didn't take it today.

DP speechless and MIL got all soapy when I sent her the scan pic.

Now I know the culprit that makes me retch and eat strange things but I don't mind at all. .Gosh,I can't believe I was looking at my child today now I'm getting soapy

Anyway,going to drop the bomb to my boss on Wednesday when I'm back to work but ask him to keep schtum for the next few weeks(so hopefully lighter duties for me).

Take care all my friends x

Thanks hairy and lime. We don't want to tell anyone until at least 12 weeks, so if I start asking my brother questions he's bound to get suspicious, and I'm not sure he'd know much more than me. Is it unusual not to know your families medical history? Our family aren't the closest, and we've never really discussed such things! Now I feel a bit odd about it .. Oh, well. Hopefully once we share the news I can ask and if there's anything relevant I can contact the midwife then.

Great news about the scan lime! How lovely to see a jumping bean. Good luck on Wednesday when you tell your boss!

twittwoo from what I recall most of the questions about family are about immediate family eg does your mother, father or any siblings have diabetes? Even if you're not close, you would probably know the answers to most questions. And as it's your first you'll have your bloods monitored several times over the pregnancy so if anything unusual does crop up they will spot it. Good luck with the appt.

Welcome blacktreaclecat - I was on progesterone till week 16, also used the 'back' entrance which I heard was less messy! Another one here with barely any symptoms.

lime yay for good scan!!!

Twittwooo you're not too far from 12 week mark anyway. When I showed positive test to my DP I asked him to keep it quiet till 12 weeks.Of course he couldn't keep his gob shut which I was very angry about.

My MIL's reaction when she found out was "oh well,remembering the last time(mc at 6 weeks),I'd rather not get my hopes too high".My friend reacted exactly the same way.It was very hurtful to me but I can understand where they were coming from having exactly the same thoughts sometimes.
Afterwards MIL called every week asking how I was and basically was counting down every day and week with me.Today we told her it's alright to spread the news(touch the wood).

Thanks to my DP blabbing around early on I got a letter from another of his family members with their pg announcement(due in Feb so "safe" already) and congratulations.I didn't like the letter because I thought that they were rubbing my nose in fact that they passed 12 week mark already and I still had this very stressful time ahead.

Up to you but your family might be a bit more sensitive-you might not get the same negative comments that I had(that made me cry) but loads of support and cautious optimism.Whatever you'll do-speak to your mum now or later doesn't really matter.It's just 2-3 weeks.

Good luck:)

Hi Peeps,

Is time going by really slowly for anyone else? It feels like ages since we got the bfp but it's only been 2 weeks! I spoke to the fertility clinic today (as had an appt for tomorrow) and they were so lovely on the phone. (I hadn't started any treatment before getting this bpf, i'm still a bit in shock tbh as my last day3 FSH result was 12.7 = crap). They basically said that they won't scan me early because i've had one miscarriage (needs to be two!) nor will they do any extra testing (HCG levels etc) because it a) won't change the outcome and b) having tests and waiting for results can cause unnecessary stress. I can kind of see their point but I just need to know everything is, or isn't okay. So, unless I can persuade my midwife to refer me for an 8 week scan we will have to pay £99 for one. I really don't want to wait until my 12 week scan to find out the baby stopped growing weeks before as that will be at Christmas time.

twitwoo I don't really know much about my parent's medical history. From what I can remember it's just basic questions. Where I live you actually pick up a whole load of forms from the Health Centre which you complete before your appt and the MW then just runs through them with you, takes your weight and some blood (iron, rubella immunity etc).

dachs glad to hear things have calmed down since having the stitch. Hopefully this week will fly by and all will be well at your scan next week. Are you going to find out the sex?

lime fab that you had a great scan! I think (and might be wrong) that pre-nuchal fold testing they would just take your bloods at 16weeks (or thereabouts) and give you a statistic based on those. Now (depending on your region) they will take the Nuchal measurement at 12 weeks along with a blood test and combine the 2 to give you a 'combined' result. Good luck with telling work! The thought of being at that stage for me feels a long way off but fingers crossed i'll make it!

I've been getting up in the night for a pee recently too (never normally do) which i'm also hoping is a good sign!

Pie,I'm the same with night pee-breaks.That was one of the things I was worried about-I didn't have increased pee-frequency in my early days.Now I go before bed time and out of a sudden have to go in the middle of the night admiring my wee bulge in the mirror on the way
Nuchal measurement should have been taken today-I'm 12 weeks on Thursday but bean was so wriggly they couldn't take it.The sonographer said that if the head is tilted backwards or lying on the chest they can't take it as it won't be accurate-if head is tilted backwards measurement will be too thick,head on chest-too thin.I suppose instead of combined result I'll just have bloods taken at the next visit.Thanks for clarifying-I didn't know they take bloods for Downs at 16 weeks,I thought it doesn't matter when.

blacktreacle your bfp's seem to be on date for me?correct me if i'm wrong,please.As for symptoms-I didn't have any till about 6-7 weeks and was going mental about it.Boobs soreness on and off(poor boobies getting prodded and squished every day),no excessive peeing and retching has started about 6-7 weeks.Even my strange food cravings were not enough indication for me (fish and crisps,going of the meat).Been there,done that,got the haddock thanks LAF

dachs hope you're taking it easy and getting plenty of rest

Off to munch some gherkins(fish tomorrow-big fat salmon)