Assisted Conception (and all the bits in between) volume 8

[lucylookout]

Looks like we need a new thread for Italian, Scrummy, Beginnings, womanly, lissy, rowing, fretfree, Teds77, keziah, frustrated and anyone else who wants to chat about assisted conception!

Hello ladies, I start Buseralin on the 10th on a long protocal so thought I'd drop in to say hello and find some friends to go through this with! Finger's crossed 2012 brings us all everything we want...

Welcome bext. You'll get a huge amount of support from the gorgeous gals on this thread - I would have been in a right pickle wihtout them. Very best of luck to you on your AC journey x

Hi all.

Happy New Year.

Welcome bext, hope 2012 will be your year.

Weller have a fab holiday and may 2012 bring a wonderful baby.

Pocket hope all is going well. Eating healthily?

Scrummy hugs. Will you be having treatment in Feb? I am hoping that our treatment will be February. We could be cycle buddies!!

Mojangles Any news?

Lucy hugs to you and your precious cargo.

Josie cakes website, where is this cakes website! Message me, please, I love looking at cakes (no eating them now it is new year!).

Sunnyg well done on all your egg research, all best wishes.

Hugs to Keziah, Lissy, Bugsylugs, Teds, Chutneyandcheese, Beginnings, arnie and all.

I went to a church service today and a lovely lady prayed for me after the service. I told her my story and that this was our last attempt. I said that after this attempt, if it did not work, we would look into adoption. She was very helpful and kind and by the end of our chat, and her praying for me, I actually felt quite positive about the prospect of adopting! So whatever 2012 brings, may it come soon.

Hello everyone and Happy New Year!

Italian so glad you feel positive about adoption. From what you have shared with us, any child joining your family would be very blessed, so I wish you all the best with everything that 2012 brings you. And no, I won't be able to cycle in Feb as we have holiday plans, so will have to wait until March. I do hope you get to cycle in Feb though. not long to go now before you get your test results

Lucy so glad to hear you had another positive scan and I'm sure the next one will be equally positive, though I can only imagine what you must feel like after your previous experience. Calming thoughts coming your way.

pocket yes, I too have read that spotting during pregnancy is totally normal, but it must be really worrying. When is your next scan? go fella go

Josie you are the cake master! They look amazing. You'll be the mum that everybody will ask to make the birthday cakes for their little darlings, but it's yours that gets the special cakes!

Welcome bext. is this your first treatment cycle? I hope you get on ok on the meds.

sunnyg I'm glad that I have made you feel inspired. And what a big decision you have made. I'm glad your DH is supportive of your decision. Keep us posted on how you progress with your research. When do you think your next IUI is?

How are all our other pregnant ladies? lissy did your neighbours behave over the holidays? teds hope all is ok with you. Have you shared the news with your families? keziah when is your next scan? beginnings hope you too had a good peaceful Christmas. bugsy did you share your news?

mojangles how are you?

Hello to chutney

AMH, sometimes don't you just love being a woman? AF arrived on Christmas eve, with extreme cramping on Christmas day. Was trying to entertain guests when all I wanted to do was to go to bed with a hot water bottle . Then on boxing day morning, et viola, Cystitis! Luckily though, it seems that my period have returned to normal (I had a day long AF visit last month after Clomid) and plenty of EWCM directly after, so all was back to normal again . Except I now have very heavy mid-cycle spotting. No positive reading on OPK yet and no temp rise, so not sure whether this would be ovulation spotting? Have any of you had mid-cycle spotting and if so, was it heavy and how long did it last?

Haven't ever had mid cycle spotting scrummy, but have read it's a sign of a strong ovulation, so get thee back to the bedroom lady, you've got some swi to do!

Happy New Year lovely ladies!

I havent caught up with everything I've missed, but congratulations to all the blooming bumpsadaisy updiffed girls, and may those symptoms be present enough to be reassuring but light enough to not ruin your life. And to the rest of us, yes, 2012 is definitely The Year of the Baby.

Italian I'm so glad to see you're going round again! What made you decide? Are you staying with the same clinic or going abroad? Very very very best of luck.

Pocket whoo whooo! Go fella go indeed! Yes spotting is the scariest thing in the world but hopefully its just your bean snuggling down and making itself cosy for the long stay.

Our Last Last Try (September having been our Last Try) is this month, in fact I expect to hear tomorrow that the donor has started her meds. So far the downreg hasnt turned me into a monster - good thing, since the injection was on Xmas Day - so half of me thinks it hasnt worked and the other half thinks I'm feeling positive and happy and therefore all the physical stuff is a synch.

Hugs to everyone and I'll catch up with everyone's stories soon...

Hello, thanks for all the welcomes!

scrummybumb I also have mid cycle spotting - can be around for 5 days and doesn't always coincide with when the OPK suggests I'm peaking (if and when it does, which is fairly rare!). I've read another forum and there seem to be lots of reasons (stress, tiredness as well as other more 'medical' ones) but lots of suggestion that there's not nec a link to OV, and won't affect conception. Hope so, anyway.

Am feeling all a bit overwhelmed by everything today. I go back to work tomorrow and am really worried that I won't be able to to keep it in it's place. It's my first cycle, I don't know how the drugs will effect me, and I really want to give this the best chance. I know how important it is to stay chilled and rested and generally look after myself, but I also know work is going to be busy and therefore probably quite stressful. I'll be really angry with myself if I don't manage to put myself first for once.

Any tips and advice on how to talk to bosses / work about this stuff? And any wise words on staying calm?
xx

Old timer (and sometime lurker) here. Just popping on to say to sunnyg that I also egg shared. I had always half thought about donating eggs when I'd completed my family, but then we faced unexpected difficulties when we came to ttc (my DH's low sperm count, diagnosed after a year and a half of ttc). So I kind of jumped at the chance to egg share when I realised that was an option.

Anyway, I egg shared with the Lister and it was my first (and so far only) cycle of IVF/ICSI (I was 31, am now 34 and pregnant naturally with my second). It's quite a long process, in that you need to have two HIV tests 3 months apart which slows things down, also syncing with the donee slows things down, so I'd suggest you get started as soon as you feel comfortable (eg we went to open evenings in mid-late Jan 2009, decided on Lister as felt v comfortable there, had initial blood tests in early Feb, with follow up HIV test May, had egg collection 9 June and tested positive with DS on 23 June ).

Whatever clinic you choose will offer counselling to make sure you and your DP are happy with the process (I found the counselling v useful). You also can write to any future children born of your donation, since they'll be able to trace you once they're 18. Unfortunately, our donee didn't get pregnant from my eggs which I found hugely disappointing (it seems mad to me now, but I was prepared for my donee to get a BFP and me to get a BFN). Anyway, I (obviously!) think it's a great thing to do and am glad to hear you're considering it .

A big happy new year to everyone else. 2012 will be the year of the baby for all!

Pocket I have my first scan next week am behind you. Good luck with your scan. I had bleeding with ds all ok. Care told me to lie down for 20-30 mins after progesterone and if I got spotting to increase lying down to up to an hr.
Hi to everyone else am on phone for first time so will check on computer later

Thanks bugsy good advice which I shall follow. Although cramping and spotting have now gone. Am both looking forward to and dreading Thursday's appointment!!

Hello everyone and welcome bext.

I hope you had a fantastic Christmas and New Year.

A huge congratulations bugsy and Kazia on your bumps and to everyone else with BFP! What a great way to start a new year.

I'm just checking back in with you all after a very lovely and well needed break. We took your fantastic advice and switched off from the TTC thoughts and just enjoyed hanging out together. However, TTC has naturally crept back in to our thoughts as our appointment to find out about DH sperm count is this Friday. It kept us both awake last night and i'm beginning to let negative thoughts creep in - I wish I could just find out now!! We had a New Year party with 2 new borns in attendance and a pregnancy announcement. I think we both handled it well but it is very hard to keep smiling through it - as you'll all know!

It is incredibly hard to think on friday we may find out that we may never conceive. It doesnt really bear thinking about.....i'm staying focused on results that will allow us to explore ICSI/IVF.

Anyway - enough on me. Just wanted to say sunngyg that I think what you're doing is amazing, egg sharing is something i've never thought about but will definitelu consider. Keep us updated!

Italian lovely to hear you got some positive vibes from your friend - its a great way to enter a new year. Full of hope for what (fingers crossed) will eventually come our way!) :-)

P.s bext - I'm also interested to hear how people are coping with ivf and work. At the moment I'm definitely struggling to concentrate and wondering how I'll manage all the appointments etc.....

Hello gorgeous ladies!

bext-Welcome to the forum! As you've probably guessed already, we welcome everyone with open arms, and feel free to ask questions, vent, sob, etc....we're all game! As far as talking to employers, I'm afraid I'm a bit of an anomaly. I'm a nanny to two sets of twins, and when I got hired, I was very straight-forward in telling my bosses that my husband and I were trying for a baby and that we needed IVF. Not only did I get hired, but they actually contributed to this latest cycle!

Pocket- How are you feeling, sweets? It wasn't actually my hip but my groin and pubic area that are painful, and still continue to be so. It's called Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction, and is very common in pregnancy. I got exercises to do from the physio, but nothing is really changed. It's not unbearable, and all worth it in the end! Hope your scan goes well! I've also heard that spotting in early pregnancy is very common.

Scrummy- Unfortunately, the jerky neighbors did NOT cooperate over the holidays, and there was loads of noise. But DH and I are persevering with the solicitor, so we have to bide our time and wait and see what happens.

chutney- Please try not to worry about appointment on Friday. As all of the other ladies said, there are loads of supplements that your DH can take, as well as a change in diet, that can help with sperm count. And if it doesn't improve enough for you to get pregnant naturally, then sure, there's IFV/ICSI. Listen, my DH hasn't ejaculated in about ten years, which can seriously impair sperm production, but they still managed to get 12 vials of viable sperm from his testicular tissue. Ask about TESA/PESA...

weller- Have a fabulous time on your holidays!!!

keziah and bugsy- How are you feeling?

Italian- How lovely to be prayed for! That must've made you feel so special. But think of it this way, all the ladies on this forum are also praying for you, and each other, every day!

AFM, nothing new to report. At 31 weeks, starting to get a bit harder to get around. Slow and steady is my mantra lately! Still having the hardest time sleeping, and wind up moving to the couch most nights (not DH's fault, I just don't want to disturb him with the TV). Have a scan and follow-up appt. next week to check on the growth of the baby, and still continue to take Metformin after breakfast for gestational diabetes.

Thank you lissysilver - sharing your story and your kind words seriously help. My very lovely husband has just returned home and cooking thai food so I'm going to sign off for today and try to push Friday from my mind and concentrate on the positives!

Also - a huge congratulations on your growing bump. What an inspiration you are :-)

Sending you all positive Vibes tonight and a special thought for those having a tough day xxx

Hi all and a big welcome to bext

It's been a big day of mixed emotions for moi. After much research I am afraid to say my chances of egg sharing as a donor look to be limited. Not only am I right on the age limit, but the real problem seems to be family history. The only thing I have is that my Mum had a heart operation for a mitral valve repair last year. It was only diagnosed 6 years ago but they have no idea if she's had it since birth. Unfortunately this will come under the heart disease banner. Which of course I need to declare. Am going to shoot off a few emails to the clinics that I've been in touch with but I suspect this may just stop the egg-sharing endeavours in their tracks......

If that's the case I'm already terribly disappointed, the more I looked into it, the more I wanted to do it, as cliche as it sounds not only for me, but to help someone else.

However the good news is that we've started today our 2nd IUI cycle! Really happy as thought I was going to have to wait another month.

Will keep you all update.

Smiles and waves to you all oxo

Sunnyg, great news that you have started your second iui. way to start 2012 best of luck. Hope fully this will give you your BFP and then egg share would not have happened. I can really understand your disappointment but remember what a special generous person you are.

Hi sunnyg I meant to say before, as a recipient of egg donation, what a fantastic thing you're considering. I wonder whether your mum's operation will be a deal-breaker, as presumably she's past retirement age and heart ops of some kind are terribly common in that age group, I imagine it would be hard for most of us to claim an entirely heart or cancer-scare free family in the over 60s. Really good luck with the IUI.

Lissy I had a bit of SPD with DS, it felt like I'd been walloped between the legs with a sledgehamer so I think you're being really brave!

Chutney I dont know your history but I do know what it's like to wait in agony for an appointment and then be floored by results (although you might be buouyed up by fab news!) Good luck for Friday - it's my birthday so nothing bad can possibly happen.

Rowing honey if you ever look in, I've been thinking of you lots and would love to know how you're doing.

AFM, exciting news, our donor started her stims today so we have less than 2 weeks till ET. This is about 10 days earlier than originally planned as she didnt get on with the pill in the last cycle and had to come off it early, so the cycle will miss the week I'd booked off work and land right in the middle of a whole bunch of commitments. I've just had to decide not to be stressed about it.

Bext nice to meet you! this will be our 6th cycle and I've taken various approaches to work, from telling my boss everything to keeping it completely secret. I'm personally conflicted about sharing such a personal thing with even lovely colleagues because of the inevitable seeding of thoughts about whether you'll be around for future events/opportunities/promotions, but it can be a nightmare juggling everything. I know someone who actually gave up work while doing IVF and I can understand why! It's become easier to keep it quiet since we've moved on to DE cycles as I havent needed all the scans you need with IVF, but if you don't work near your clinic I'd suggest letting your boss know you're undergoing some medical treatment and need regular tests for a while as otherwise trying to be in 2 places at once becomes a nightmare.

Ooh and, I meant to ask, does anyone have an idea for a gift for our donor? Last 2 times we gave her a lovely tiffany-style necklace and a bracelet. I think we've rather done jewellery now and anyway have no idea of her style, so could have been getting it all wrong, but I do want to give her a personal token of my deep deep gratitude for this magical thing she's doing for us.

sunnyg so sorry to hear things are not going well in the egg donating thing. As someone trying to get pregnant with egg donation on egg share, I am very grateful for people like you. My three lovely frosties are thanks to someone kind like you. So whatever happens, just the fact you wanted to do it, is so very kind. God Bless you honey. May you be super successful super soon.

Mojangles hi darling, what decided me to go again was my three embies, I've named them Serentis, Jenever and May. They are waiting for me. So I will stay at the same clinic. Personally, I would stick with jewellery for your donor. An ornament etc would also depend on personal taste and anything else would be tough to choose unless it was a really lovely scarf or something (I mean a silk one not a woolly one!). We have given necklaces and a bracelet to our donors, but they only got one item each so yours are doing jolly well. I actually took (as I remember you did too) great delight in choosing the gift. We had so little to go on, only eye and hair colour, so choosing something was hard but we found the nicest thing we could afford and that was it. I also wrote a beautiful card and I kept a copy of the card for myself. So happy for you as you go through this again. REALLY hope it will work for you this time too.

Lissy I misread the words 'wind up on the sofa' and thought you said 'wind', as in body wind! Which I am sure pregnancy can bring! Anyway, honey, all the very best with your pregnancy may it all go well.

Bext I would echo what Mojangles says. My journey to have a second child (we have a seven year old DD) has been a long one and it would have very hard to have told all my various bosses (if you count conception of DD who was with IUI) there have been about 6 bosses who I have worked for! Personally, I prefer not to tell too many people, there are huge expectations about what will happen and possibly with work it will call into question future promotion or work etc. I would certainly go with ambiguous medical but non-life threatening and if my boss were male I would be tempted to play the 'female' medical card so he did not ask too many questions! Just my opinion.

Hugs to rowing, Keziah and all.

Today I called up about getting a hysteroscopy. I am hopeful that it will all happen in the next few weeks, before we see the consultant again. There have been some hassles getting through to book it etc and I found myself wondering if I were fighting the universe as I heard the same lousy message again and again! I still have not booked it so hopefully it will be booked tomorrow.

Yes, it was nice to be prayed for. I felt so peaceful. Now I also feel motivated to lose the weight or at least a little of it before we start treatment next month. I figure I can lose at least a little in a month. I am inspired by The Biggest Loser!

Anyone else watching it? I want the orange guy or the purple girls or the yellow girl to win! One girl is not that much bigger than me! Luckily, she is the smallest one there - but still!!!

PS

Hugs to Weller, Bugsylugs, Josie, Teds, Chutneyandcheese, Beginnings, and Lucy.

Is arnie still around?

Hugs to all.

Hi everyone
Firstly so sorry this is going to be it's another 'all bout me email'! But I promise I'll keep it short and sweet.

Just wanted to let you all know that egg sharing is back on!!!! Wooo hoooo! Had an email from a clinic this morning to say they didn't see Mum's heart op as being a problem and a conversation with another that said the same. Of course if accepted onto a programme they'll go into this in more detail but it all looks really positive. Mojangles you are spot on, with heart conditions etc being so common it my Mum's age group the egg sharing nurses I've spoken to don't seem to be fazed by it, so thank you to you and Italian (and everyone of course) for your kind words of encouragement. Hearing how lovely you both are to think of such thoughtful gifts (and even give a gift) for your donors practically made me cry. It would be just so amazing if this egg sharing happens, already I feel so excited about the prospect of getting our first bub but also helping ladies just like you too,

So now just onwards and upwards reading through the mountains of paperwork and filling out forms - gosh what a roller coaster this fertility journey is eh? One day you feel so bad, and the next you are totally elated!

BTW - any thoughts on clinics (London based)? It looks like the Bridge may be out (cut off 34) but still possible with The Lister, CRM and LWS. Also Herts & Essex (the egg donation nurse I spoke to there, Sarah was sooo nice, it's amazing when someone is just that bit nicer how it can sway you!).

Many thanks again ladies. Am going to catch up on all your news tonight - right before return of 'One born'!!!

sunnyg excellent news glad it has put you on a high. To think I used to love roller coasters!!
No advice on clinics as nowhere near London but I am sure one of these lovely ladies will pop on soon to say
Waves to all

Warning - another mammoth post from me!

Mojangles Happy birthday for yesterday. And how exciting that you're donor is starting her treatment. Best of luck to you and your January BFP

Italian - yes I'm eating well (and often ) - but I'll be glad when all the Christmas biccies and chocs are gone as I'm tucking in daily which is naughty! I'm glad you're planning your treatment and feeling positive about 2012. Its lovely that someone prayed for you. Kind people are lovely - and you're both kind and lovely and i'm also praying that you get your BFP very soon this year x

Scrummy Sorry I can't help with the mid cycle spotting (and i hope you've managed to kick that cystitis into touch - ouch!). Lucky you with your holiday coming up AND your next cycle planned in. Busy start to 2012 for you! my scan is tomorrow afternoon btw.

Bext this whole process is stressful so what you're feeling is totally normal. Staying calm is a big challenge but just try and put yourself first all the time, focus on that little baby then everything else just falls to second place anyway!

Sunnyg fabulous news that you've started your IUI everything is crossed for you my dear. Wow you're on an egg share rollercoaster - are you going to put it to one side while you do your treatment or look into at the same time? My lovely donor came, I think, through Herts and Essex but my actual transfer was at the Lister - sorry that's a bit confusing but i always dealt with the harley street fertility centre, who clearly link with other clinics. But if you like the lady at the H&E, go for it, i'm a massive beleiver in going with instinct. Also, check what other clinics they're working with as its very possible that you may have your treatment in central london - can't remember where you're based but would that suit you? xxx

Chutney good luck with your appointment on Friday - just know that clincs can do all sorts of magic things so whatever the outcome, I'm sure you'll have some options to explore. . Mojangles says some great stuff about telling work. But do you have say anything at all - is it possible to keep it quiet? I think most of us have done that to avoid all the unecessary questions and enquiries. If you're worried about needing time off for appointments, can you get early/lunch/late ones - check with your clinic as that made all the difference to me.

Lissy wow 31 weeks you're blooming. Sorry to hear that you're groin is still playing up, I guess its one of natures ways of making you take it easy . Make the most of it as you'll be a busy bee when baby arrives

Teds how are you and your twins - what's next for you scan/check up wise?

This time tomorrow i'll have had my scan and hopefully heard little fella's heartbeat and know that the pregnancy is viable. i'm both terrified and excited!!

Big hello to anyone i've missed...

xxx

Lucy best of luck to you my love with your scan on Friday

sunnyg what a roller coaster indeed for you this week. I hope you get your BFP though, as wonderful as your plans for egg sharing are, so good luck with the IUI. I guess your other plans will keep you nicely focused on something else. Remind me, are you doing a medicated IUI? I can't help with the clinics I fear....

bext thanks for your note re spotting. I've obviously googled and did wonder whether I should book an appt to see my GP. I think I'll see how the rest of the month goes. It's definitely reduced now, hardly noticiable, but still there I'm planning to book holiday for two weeks during the key treatment time without telling anything about the treatment at work. People may say it won't affect anything, but I don't want to take the risk.

Italian I've not seen the Biggest Looser, but I'm sure you look nothing like them And yes, you can loose plenty weight in a month, but not sure how good crash dieting would be ahead of your journey, so maybe just take it steady?

mojangles that's come around very quick, hasn't it. I really hope it goes smoothly for you. Maybe a charm for a bracelet?

lissy blah about your neighbours I hope that you get some relief from the pain which ever way you can. And what wonderful employees you have.

chutney I wish you all the best for Friday. I hope you manage some sleep between now and then.

Waves to everybody I haven't mentioned. Like sunnyg looking forward to OBEM tonight.

Just a quickie to wish pocket all the best for tomorrow and chutney good luck for Friday.

SunnyG keeping everything crossed for your IUI cycle. I think egg sharing would be a wonderful thing, but hopefully it won't come to that.
Scrummy where are you going on your hols? Hope you have a lovely, lovely time x
Lissy I had SPD with my first pregnancy, luckily only in the last 3 weeks as I was completely immobilised by it. Even now at 11 weeks I've started getting odd aches in my hips and legs at night, so am being very careful with how I move around, trying to keep myself squarely on two feet. I'm glad yours is manageable and hope that with your exercises it will stay that way.
Mojangles good luck with your treatment. I kind of think jewellery (or a beautiful non woolly scarf as Italian suggested) would be lovely for your donor.
Thanks for those who remembered my scan on Friday. I'm truly terrified and trying to keep myself busy and distracted and definitely NOT thinking about it [la, la, la hands in ears] .