TTC for 10+ months, part 3

[joycep]

The other thread was just about to fill up and so here we are again with a slightly different name now as many of us have been trying for well over 12 cycles now. We had a few great successes on Part 2, with a couple of people getting bfp's on their 17th and 19th month of trying. So let's hope for more successes on Part 3. (Moaning, crying, sadness, anxiety & bitterness is certainly allowed on here!)

Lemon the 30 pills definitely wasn't a dream!

I was in a rear-opening hospital gown for mine (lovely) but they made me hitch it up just below my boobs so it was a bit pointless.

Skelly the sensitive cervix thing sounds nasty.

Busy thread this morning!

Mrsd - interesting what you've been told about clomid. I do suspect i'm being given the expensive option. I may have to say something. Clomid just gave me thrush and i think it actually stopped me from ovulating> The thrush doesn't matter if they are IUIing it but i obviously need to ovulate. I think it's worth a try anyway Mrsd. You get it on insurance don't you? The thing is with all this, you just never know and where there is a chance, then sth could work. Pout - i'm going to be taught how to self inject in a few weeks. I may get DH to do it. He did the last one and loved it! Normally this sort of thing would freak me out but i think i've got braver in this process. Is AF still staying away for you? Do you do pregnancy tests?

Thanks Euro for the info on Raynauds. I'm a bit of a hyperchrondiac...I would know if I had it wouldn't I? I jsut ask because i have appalling circulation and i get incredibly cold - weirdly cold. I don't get numb fingers particularly though. I am pleased you didn't find the HSG painful. It's just terribly undignified.

Nelly - organic meat for me from now on! It was like Rod Stewarts wife who took ages to get pregnant and her nutrionist told her she had too much mecury in her body from all the fish she ate. at your dream! I often wondered whether i should go and sleep with lots of people to see if that gets me up duffed...

Lemons - I don't really have a diagnosis. i think muggins here as been panicked by her gynae and so she says it's time to do iui althogh realistically i know it won't work.

Hello to everyone esle.

Hmm, MAP - that reminds me. When I was 19 I had unprotected sex with an ex who I still really fancied (what was I thinking, he was horrible and a tart...a few years later when I moved abroad, I had to have an HIV test as part of my work permit application; I was very relieved to find it was all ok!). Anyway I digress. I went to the GP on the Monday morning, suitably sheepish, and was given the MAP. A bit later (a couple of weeks maybe?) I remember mentioning to my sister that I hadn't had my period. I then went on holiday with her, and at some point on holiday we were out for a meal and my period arrived - this was probably 4 weeks after taking the MAP. It was awful. I was wearing a summer dress and I literally had a blood stain the size of my arse, all over my dress . I had to get my sister to chaperone me to the loo, then out of the restaurant. I don't remember having excessive pains or anything, and was way too naive to think too much about it (other than the humiliation, obviously). However now I wonder if there was more to it than that? I've never had a period like it, before or since. I'm not sure the timescales add up to anything more sinister (I don't think I'd have been pregnant before taking the MAP); but hey it gives me something else to obsess over .

Glad I've given you giggles though. I suspect I'm coming across as a bit of a Harpie today .

Lemons You can't not let me have any cake I mean't to ask - are you making the wedding cake?

Ohh mid cycle bleeding?! Where are you at with your cycle? FX that it is a good sign for you!

Euro Glad that your HSG is all over with and that your tubes were patent. You described the indignity so well!

Nelly I am intrigued by your hobby. I suppose if it is an unusual past time it might out you if you tell us what it is
You have made me giggle with your dreams.

Skeleton A sensitive cervix must be annoying. It must be difficult for you when you have to have smears and stuff. Touching my cervix makes me feel pukey, I think it's the blow hole thing that freaks me out.

Joycep I think I would let DP do the injecting on me too. He is very good at all things a bit yuk and has been known to chase me round and pin me down on the couch in order to put eye drops in my eyes - I am a big baby!
I rarely get the chance to do pregnancy tests as my cycle length has been known to get to 34 days. By the time I get to that AF comes and spoils the party anyway!

wow, such a lot of posts since I checked in this morning!

lemon I love the sound of your cakes. I'm feeling a little hopeful for you that it might be implantation. This thread is due another BFP.

pout & skeleton I'm feeling much better today thank you. I think an early night sorted me out. I'm only on 8dpo and my LP is normally 15 days so a bit early for pmt but I did feel emotional and strange yesterday but ok today.

pout what's happening with your house move?

euro I'm pleased that your tubes were ok. I feel reassured about knowing that it was ok apart from the dignity issues. I suspect that I won't even get a gown or a cover up. They don't feel any shame here about bearing all bits in front of the doctor. I have to strip off in front of the gynae and walk across the room with nothing on my bottom half to the bed and I don't get any sheet or towel. So I doubt that the hsg will be any different. I hate it though because I feel self conscious, I always think that my bits probably look totally different to anything else they have ever seen and I imagine them looking down in disgust.

So a woman who is on maternity leave came in to work today. She annoyed me so much because she never shut up about how her life is so perfect now, there is no feeling like being a mum, maternity leave is fab blah, blah, blah. And her baby is really beautiful and cute, although I made a point of not going over the top with the cooing like everyone else was. I know for a fact that it took her 2 months to conceive because she told us all when she announced the pregnancy, another super fertile person. I managed to find an excuse to escape to another office foe a bit though so I didn't have to listen to her going on and on too much.

joycep I remember reading about Penny Lancaster and the mercury. But I'm sure their problems probably had more to do with him being fairly ancient than from eating too much fish. I'm a bit sceptical about these non-medical people who claim to hold all the answers.

Hi everyone I've been racing all your posts just been so busy I haven't had a chance to write anything myself! That's good about your tubes Euro. I was supposed to have an hsg this month (then do remaining two months of clomid) but when I phoned on cd1 as told to I was told they were fully booked and probably would be next month too! So what do I do now? Carry on seeing my consultant privately and taking the clomid and injections en my tubes could be blocked although unlikely. Are they not usually only blocked if you've had an STD?

Also a bit peed off as before I went on clomid I ovulated, probably not every month according to my blood tests but I did at least a couple of times as I got pregnant and had some bloods done that showed I had. I don't have pcos but when I was put on 50mg I didn't ovulate, I then ovulated twice on 100mg with and injection and then didn't this month on just 100 mg (without the injection as on holiday).

I knew I hadn't ovulated as I get an ache in one side when I do and I hadn't. I'm just so bloody confused as to why clomid works for women who definitely haven't ovulated before and yet 100mg which is quite a high dose doesn't work without an injection!!!

In other news a friend of mine has told me that in Denmark where she is from vitamin D has been shown to significantly increase sperm motility. Thought you might be interested!

In moments of optimism, I am treating the indignity of the HSG as a trial run for the indignity of childbirth...

Oh also, I was googling celebrities who've had fertility problems for encouragement and Joanna Taylor who ws in Hollyoaks and s married to Danny murphy tried for years and had unexplained fertility. She then tried clomid and in the end had ivf which was successful on the third go. She then had another baby naturally after!

and didn't Zoe Ball take about 5 yrs to conceive?

I hated the MAP - i had to go and get it a few times with DH before we were married - how pointless! . The scathing looks I got from the nurses at the walk in centre were unbelievable. They didn't believe I was with a long term boyf.

I think Zoe Ball did take a while. It's interesting how many people seem to struggle having their first baby and then their body seems to get the hang of it and they conceive their subsequent babies more easily.

Well I'm out. I've started spotting - what a surprise, NOT! Does anyone else feel like it's just groundhog day. I don't even feel upset, just flat & peed off that it's the same old story. Strangely DP seems to have taken it more to heart this month. He's never said before that he wasn't expecting my AF to come & said that he was quite optimistic this cycle. Oh well, at least I won't be moving with morning sickness and having to hide it when we are crashing on sofas. I think secretly I hoped that because it would be a bad time that sods law might come into play. Stupid me

gaga I was v lucky with timing. I only saw the gynae for the first time on 22 August. He referred me for a TV ultrasound, blood test and HSG. By 1 September I have had them all! After waiting for months to see him due to two lost referrals, things are now moving swiftly.

joycep I'm no expert (I've never seen a dr about it) but my fingers go exactly like the ones in the wikipedia pictures- white from the tips down. My mum is exactly the same and so when it started happening when I was a teenager (the normal time for it to start) I knew exactly what it was because I had grown up seeing my mum's hands that way.

Someone mentioned that most of the women on the Pred thread are repeat miscarriage suffers. That's right. But the autoimmune stuff can also be responsible for implantation failure. Basically reproductive immunology is an umbrella for a wide variety of immune responses in the body that either attack foreign bodies such as sperm or an embryo as "invaders" or blood clotting issues. Dr Beer who pioneered this stuff was looking for a reason for the 1/3 "unexplained" infertility and it covers both implantation failure and miscarriage. It's interesting stuff but rejected by many drs.

Euro - that was lucky. Did you have to phone up to book on cd1? That's how they do it at my local hospital which has me a little worried as I could be told every month when I phone that they're fully booked!

Joycep - Has your gynae recommended IUI? I mentioned it to mine and he said that there was no point as it's not very successful and better to have IVF instead!!!

Blimey lots of activity today!

pout I only have to travel that far because I've not changed doctor yet, house move wise we are still at the inlaws ( week 9) I think!!!

So at work today I find out another colleague is pregnant, so that's 3 upduffed, 3 on maternity leave and one just returned back from maternity leave!!!

I think they say once you've fallen pregnant your body learns how to do it, which is why people fall again naturally the 2nd time.

Oh i waaaaaant a baby :sob:

As you were :(

Am I wrong to hope there is something wrong with dhs results?????

Being nosey... Where do you all live?
I'm in buckinghamshire.

gaga yes, I had to call on CD1 and I was lucky they could fit me in the first time of trying. Maybe it helped that it was a bank holiday week and people were away. It was particularly tricky because I have long periods and tend to bleed for 7/8 days and they want to do it before day 10, so that only leave day 9 each cycle! I was still spotting a tiny bit when I went this morning but she said as it wasn't fresh blood she could do it.

Karbea I'm in Sarf East London.

Another one of my old school friends has had a baby. Sigh

Hi all,

Sorry euro about the 'unexplained' diagnosis, I was dreading getting that but actually now we have found out that we have male factor and (as far as I can tell from incessant googling) it is unlikely we will conceive without ivf/IUI I wish it was unexplained, because then there would be some hope each month rather than knowing deep down no matter what I do it's not going to happen. (NB hasn't stopped me trying!)

Either way it really really sucks.

pout I'm just taking bog standard tesco pregnancy vits, however now I'm not so sure I did ov early. My temp came right back down this morning though the opks have gone back to being negative. Maybe this is an anovulatory cycle? I am feeling very PMTish, in such a bad mood as is normal a day or two before AF, but not normal for just after o. Seems like I have gone directly to psycho pregnancy-envy bitch this month.

nelly I can't imagine being pregnant either (done it once but can't imagine it happening again) If I actually ever did have a BFP now I don't know what I would do, far from jumping up and down with excitement/crying with happiness I'd probably totally freak out. I just can't imagine it happening, let alone being a big fat pregnant lady or having a tiny baby.

drizzle thanks for the baked goods and that bleeding sounds very positive, fingers crossed! I check obsessively for spotting from about 5dpo to 12dpo every month, that would be a very good sign in my opinion!

In my case, it's getting pregnant for the second time that's the problem, I was one of those annoying women who gets pregnant first time without thinking about it. But now I can't! Though it's H who is the problem (well, the only problem we've discovered so far). I think it is true though that sometimes the first time is a struggle and the next time isn't - I know a few people that that's happened to.

Anyway I'm in bed now and going to try to get to sleep early, I've felt a bit out of sorts all day, think I'm coming down with something, sadly it's too early to be a symptom of anything so think this is my first cold of winter - woo-hoo.

(sorry for the war and peace length post!!)

Euro - poor you. Just checked out the wiki link and seen the pics. It is quite distinctive. Sorry about your school friend...

Karbea - I am in London.

Pout - more often than not, I hear that those who struggle for their first, find it easier with their second. And so they should!
But Munki I do hear of people having a problem with their 2nd after the first came easily. It's very strange. How long ago did you give birth? And has sth happened to your DH sperm since he got you pregnant before? I find it really interesting that you can't imagine being pregnant even though you have done the whole thing before. It just goes to show how powerful our thoughts are.

Do you think these pregnacare vitamins are worth taking? They're so expensive and I have been taking since March last year . DH thinks they are the cause of our problems!!

Blimey Karbea 9 weeks with the in-laws sounds pretty horrendous. Presumably you're still looking for another house. I'm in Sussex at the mo.

Mrsd Our house thing is still up in the air. The agents are worse than useless and have repeatedly messed up. The latest is they sent us the wrong referencing forms. So we still don't know what will happen. I fully expect that since I am in the grips of major period induced hormonal rage the house will fall through!

Munki I take the Tesco ones too because they are a lot cheaper than the branded ones.

It's funny isn't it how you would rather have the unexplained diagnosis while I find it the most frustrating diagnosis we could have got! Just goes to show that whatever the problem is it just sucks. Do you mind if I ask how long ago you conceived your first because I wonder whether age is a big factor in everything.
I was thinking this morning that I reckon I would be a lot more relaxed about taking a long time to conceive if I was 10 years younger and had more time to play with. As it is I just feel an enormous pressure that my time is running out.

Sorry to hear that you are all at sea with your ovulation.

Joycep It's interesting that your DH wonders whether the vitamins are buggering things up. I am toying with the idea of just buying Folic Acid and not the all singing all dancing pre-preg multi vits and seeing if it makes a difference and will settle my cycle back down to 28 days. I'm also pondering ditching the Metformin for a bit because I'm sick of pill popping to no avail. The Metformin also still upsets my stomach so it would be nice to have a break from all that. DP and I were talking last night and I was saying that I reckon we have a toxic house that is stopping me getting upduffed. Talk about clutching at straws!

munki I know what you mean about finding male factor issues take away the hope. I too wish that everything had come back normal so then at least I could kid myself that it was just bad luck so far and that this month would be the one. Whereas I know it would be a miracle to get a BFP naturally. That's not to say that I don't always have a tiny glimmer of hope but it pretty soon disappears when I look at the SA results. Do you think your DH's sperm problems are recent?

pout I feel for you with the house stuff being up in the air. It's awful when things are in limbo. I feel a bit like that with all the ttc stuff. If I wasn't ttc then I might have looked for another job but I'd put it on hold because I thought I'd be pregnant but then it hasn't happened so now I don't know what to do. I care less and less about work these days, all I want is a baby. Sigh.

joycep I've compared the pregnacare packet with the local pregnancy ones I get here. They don't seem to sell conception ones just pregnancy but they have the same folic acid so I figure they do the same job. The chemist where I buy them must think I'm having the world's longest pregnancy. Anyway the pregnacare ones have much higher doses than the ones here so I don't know if that's good or bad. As I've said before I do have shorted cycles (more like 28-30 days rather than 34,35 days when on pregnacare). They make my pee bright yellow in the morning though.

gaga thanks for the info on Vit D. I made DH sit on the balcony for an hour when he got home to soak up the rays. I'm pretty sure he gets enough Vit D though as we live in a sunny climate.

Re. celebs. I think Zoe B struggled to conceive her second baby not her first. She said that it happened when she gave up drinking (I think they both drank heavily, didn't Norman go into rehab?). There is a story here about it but warning, it is in the Sun. www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/features/2697698/Zoe-Ball-on-sobering-up-to-have-a-baby.html

Hello ladies can I join? I was around on mumsnet a lot about a year ago but gave up as I felt I needed to chill out more about it all. Now feeling much better about it all and I now feel ready to come back as i miss the support I got from these threads. We have been trying for 20 months now. I was diagnosed with both pcos and mild endometretris. In January I had ovarian drilling and they zapped the few bits of endo away. Anyway still not pregnant so this month took 50mg of clomid had to have scan early due to the bank holiday to check if it had worked which showed I had one egg that looks possible although still a little small (but I was scanned on day 10) so there is still hope for this month, luckily been on holiday for my fertile period so had plenty of chances to try and get it to work been told if it doesn't work I have to take 100mg of clomid next month. Anyway that's all about me I think. Looking forward to getting to know all you ladies!

Hi florin

I really want something little and fixable to be wrong with one of us, that way we can fix it and get pregnant :living in a dream world:
Dh did his test this am, results should be back in a few days.

My mum (who was 23 at the time) had a miscarriage, then fell pregnant with me straight away, then tried for 8 years for my brother (who is 30 today!). I will at some stage ask her if they knew why it took so long, but she and I really aren't that close, so hard to ask.

pout we think we've found somewhere else, the previous sale (of the house we are now hoping to buy) also fell through, so hopefully we can buy the searches, which should speed things up!

mrsden Im the same re: jobs, I want to leave but no point really as I wouldn't want to leave get a new one, fall pregnant and then not be able to get maternity pay. Although my companies maternity pay is rubbish, and I'm hoping dh will just let me leave as soon as I'm upduffed!

Pout - sorry i forgot to say i'm sorry you're out this month. It's becoming all too farmiliar isn't it that it is getting glossed over now ...we really need another bfp on this thread. What happens if you come off Metformin? Do you have to take it every day? When are you moving - have you found somewhere?

Welcome Florin - sorry to hear of your troubles. You sound very upbeat though which is good.

Interesting that the vitamins shorten yourcycle mrsd - perhaps there is something in them.

karbea - i can't believe your mother tried for 8yrs to have your brother. tHE MORE i hear of these stories , the more i just think how weird and totally out of our controls. I keep imagining that i'm going to adopt a child in about 5 years and then falling pregnant. arggh boss here.

mrsd It is the limbo thing that seems to stop life going forward isn't it. Do you think you will bother looking for a new job or are you reluctant because of the chance that you will be having treatment? I keep telling myself each month that I will stop with the optimism and get on with new things that don't involve TTC - it never happens and I am cross with myself about it, I'm usually really self disciplined but can't seems to tame the beast of TTC!

About the vit D I'm sure I read that female fertility may be linked to getting enough time in the sunshine and have wondered whether I should brave the wasps & get myself in the garden more.

It's interesting about your Mum Karbea. I hope that your house purchase goes through smoothly. I don't know about you but I keep hoping that a change of house might give things a boost and I'll find myself upduffed!

Hello Florin you sound like you are going through the mill. Good luck with your egg!

Joycep I know what you mean about failure just becoming the norm. I am feeling a bit sorry for myself. Yesterday before I started spotting I was daring to think that it might have happened (coffee and tea tasted disgusting as did Prawn Cocktail crisps, they tasted like raw pork, and my boobs were burning like crazy) so of course when I "relaxed" on knicker watch duty the witch snuck in! Pre-AF, I sometimes feel like King Canut (is it?) sat there trying to hold back the tide - literally! The Metformin is supposed to be taken three times a day and is supposed to help the body absorb insulin more efficiently for people with PCOS which in turn is supposed to stop your ovaries absorbing too much and therefore aiding regular ovulation. I just feel like nothing is working and feel that a bit of a detox of tablets and lotions and potions might be a good thing. Probably a stupid & irresponsible idea.
Leaving here in 2 weeks. Even if we get the house in the saga we can't move in there for another fortnight-ish - arrghh!

Hi everyone,
Been to the drs today and got results of tests. Scan was inconclusive but she said they go by blood resulta and they did show pcos. She had referred is to fertility clinic which is good cos first Dr wanted us to wait for 18months. We have already waited 15. My hubby has to hand in a sperm sample so we have a date for that for when we come back our holidays. We fly out on Sunday :)

sorry about AF pout. It's never gets easier even if you expect it.

izzy it sounds like you're moving forward but I'm sorry your hormones indicate pcos. Mine do too.

If I did get a new job I'd probably have to put ttc on hold because you usually have to work for a new company for a certain amount of time to build up to the maternity leave I'd get with my current job. And to be honest I don't have the energy for job hunting. I know I should probably throw myself into my work to stop me thinking of ttc but instead I have found that I have less and less interest in work and dream of maternity leave instead. I don't feel very productive right now. I'm fed up with it all, it's not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair. If I could lie down on the floor I'd throw a full blown tantrum I reckon. Why do I have to be one of the 2 % or whatever it is that can't conceive without help? Feeling full of self pity and not helped by getting a text to say a friend is in labour. At least I'm going on holiday on sunday, yay for that!