TTC for 10+ months, part 3

[joycep]

The other thread was just about to fill up and so here we are again with a slightly different name now as many of us have been trying for well over 12 cycles now. We had a few great successes on Part 2, with a couple of people getting bfp's on their 17th and 19th month of trying. So let's hope for more successes on Part 3. (Moaning, crying, sadness, anxiety & bitterness is certainly allowed on here!)

Sounds like a plan!

I'm honestly so excited that I actually ovd! Fingers crossed

Sorry about the weather in Scotland ladies, but glad you are getting away nelly. I didn't realise your sister had had ivf either.
Also congrats on the ovulation izzy, you must be thrilled!
Kitty - dying to hear all about the meditation CD! I have been considering taking up meditation or various Buddhist practices as I really think i need to be able to handle this ttc stuff a bit better.
Congrats mr euro on the promotion. You must be very pleased Euro.
Biscuits - the amount of money i have spent on weird things since ttc is incredible. \the only thing i haven't spent that much money on are pregnancy tests as i never bloody need them. I did let my mum know that ivf was £10k a go and i think she stopped breathing for a bit. It's just so annoying how she really believes that if you stop thinking about it, it will happen.

Hope everyone had good weekends..

Hello,

How are we all?
I'm 6dpo and I think I've cysitis, so again at a key point my body will be fighting off anything it finds in my nether regions! At exactly the time of month when it shouldn't be.

We still haven't exchanged, but luckily dh is feeling slightly better...

Just a quick hello to everyone from me.

Sorry for my absence when so much has been happening! We had some time off work last week and decided to go up to Scotland for a last minute break (particularly after I couldn't get in for a HSG this month, which bothered me more than I thought). It was so beautiful and really took our minds off everything. We had good weather in the week but this last weekend was pretty horrid - just meant we had to hide away in the cottage reading books and drinking wine.

skele - sorry AF got you, what a horrid thing to happen

joycep - i've got everything crossed for you

CD11 so not much happening here at the moment. Sorry not to namecheck everyone - will catch up later too

Hi Karbea - I cross-posted, sorry you think you've got cystitis. Painful and not what you need at the vital time of the month. I hope it disappears sharpish.

I've been reading this thread for a while now but this is my first post.

AF got me yesterday. This is our 14th month of TTC. Went to my GP last month who told us to keep trying and that it will happen. I wish I had her confidence.

I'm very impatient and when I decide something I want to happen then and there so I've not taken to this too kindly. I think DH and I have been pretty niave to be honest, I really didn't expect it to be this hard. We're both healthy, don't smoke, aren't over weight, we are both fit and only drink a little so why is it taking so long?

We both want children but didn't want TTC to take over our lives. We haven't told any friends or family as we didn't want the additional pressure BUT after 14 months it is taking over. I spent most of last night in the loo crying because I didn't want DH to see how upset I was that AF got me.

AF very regular, I've been using ovulation sticks for the past 4 months and I am ovulating at the same time every month. It is just so frustrating.

Sorry for the rant but I just feel terrible today... thanks for listening.

Hi Moray. I think you need to press your GP as it has been more than a year. Some experts say that if you are both healthy and dtd at the right time, it should take no more than 3 months. I know I have 10 cycles of perfectly timed swi behind me, plus I'm not sure how many months sperm might have reached egg when we were taking a more casual approach. We are having investigations now. It's a very personal decision, but it might be time for you to push forward and ask for tests for you and your husband.

Just bobbing in. Apologies if this is a very me post but I'm pretty nuke and worried.

Firstly I've been pretty ill this week with same old ibs issues. So was at gps today and picked up my day 5 lh and fsh results and I'm pretty shocked. It was day 5 and my lh was 4.2 and my fsh 9.5 it says normal but the upper limit for fsh is 10.2 and a quick google has confirmed my worst thoughts that I have a high fsh and I know that isn't good.I don't understand, I'm so fit and healthy in terms of diet, exercise etc and my mum and gran didn't go through the menopause til their mid fifties.

So, now to add to the iffy morphology it looks like we have issues with my egg quality too. I'm gutted. Although as dh said, it isn't a surprise to find out we are challenged in the fertility department! And it rules out egg sharing ivf, as fsh needs to be under 8. Aghhhhhhhh! It was day 5 and I think day 3 seems to be the one that people refer to, but I read it doesn't change much.

Maybe I'm never going to do this :-( positive thoughts or any other info much appreciated, I saw the nurse today and she beamed and said well thats good news isn't it? I knew better though!

Hope everyone else is ok, will be a little less thoughtless in next post and talk to you all properly!

Nuke? Not sure what that even should of been! Use, I'm pretty nuke!

wine - oh I hope you are all right - was this the first time you have your bloods taken?. I am not up on fsh levels. But I think you should get your bloods done on day3 and not day 5 as that surely will skew the results....
Is there a gynae you can chat with becAuse I think you need to be advised what this actually means if anything. Nurses And gps aren't the people to talk to for this. But don't panic, Think how many people have babies and probably with a much higher fsh level than this but they just don't know about it. And jade goody s 55yr old heroine addict mother got pregnant don't forget. Heck it seems you don't need ovaries!!

I hope you are ok. I know only too well what it's like when you are given numbers which scare the hell out of you. But I hope you can go and speak to a consultant.

Oh and wine, don't forget last months head Fu** , I know I am
Diagnosing you from afar but you obviously had a CP so you can do this naturally, forget ivf!!

Thanks joycep for this. Well I think they were testing for pcos, because they had an elevated lh on my notes but said this was because I'd been tested in the luteal phase, so it would be high. I am clinging to the hope that a day3 test would be lower, but google seems to suggest it wouldn't be much different. But the, with fsh, even a point lower means an awful lot. I'm not sure what happened last month, but it was very strange. I hope I did conceive, but then maybe egg quality is a big problem for me. Maybe this explains my months where I don't ov, or the pre period spotting?

I am in a bit of despair really. It isn't a devastatingly bad result, but it is very borderline. Coupled with the morphology issue, it isn't sounding great in terms of our combined fertility. Also gutting to know that egg share wouldn't be on the cards. I know at 34, pushing 35, I'm not getting any younger. But I'm fit, eat an amazing diet, drink fresh juices everyday and yet these are all the things they suggest to get fsh lower. I wonder if I was unhealthy ass it would be higher! Also, shocking to think that the menopause is there, on the horizon. I still feel young!

But enough about my woes. How's your waiting going? I'm so rooting for you.

wine - don't despair, honestly the menopause could be 15 years away. This is the trouble with these tests , they just make us paranoid. I know it's scary thinking about things but this is what my friend did with me when I found out my ovarian reserve was bordering on low and she sat me down and said have I got a plan of action, a timeline. It sort of meant facing the despair and worry and just thinking of a route to deal with it. I don't know what these fsh levels mean but as you say they are not disastrous- they are normal- but you should get an expert opinion on what you should do. I know the egg sharing thing rules are crap. Thinking of worse case scenarios, Would ivf be an option if you couldn't egg share? Have you considered IuI ?

It totally sucks why your fsh levels would be high when you're so healthy. I find myself feeling very bitter about this myself and my crappy reserve. It doesn't make sense and like you my mother was mid fifties when she hit the menopause and she drank through all her pregnancies as they did in those days. And totally agree that we should be junkie/alcoholics and then we would have a better chance.

Also people will be conceiving all the time even though their eggs aren't at aren't at their optimum but it takes just one good egg. Wasn't your Dh sperm morph around 7%??

Joycep the latest sperm was 7% which was a big improvement but I'd still like it to be higher...and we could have ivf with some borrowing etc. But now I'm worried I wouldn't be a very good candidate? Can I be cheeky and ask what your levels have been? And did your super gynae have any words of wisdom? It's really helped to read your messages as I feel a bit bewildered by it.

Hi wine

Sorry to hear that this has happened and you have been upset. I totally agree with joycep that you need to go through this with the gynae before drawing any conclusions. Fsh numbers scare me too but try to remember that you are within the normal range. I know that you are outside the egg sharing requirement but given that 35 is the cutoff age for that anyway, it might just be that it is a normal result for your age. Also, you are only just above that cutoff; the numbers go up into the 40s and 50s I think when menopause is approached, so 9 is really way off that. Hopefully you will get your natural bfp soon but if that doesn't happen your fsh is well within the levels needed for ivf. So please don't give up hope.

Also I have tried to find out what the effect of fsh on fertility is and there doesn't seem to be a clear answer. Whilst it is an indication of ovarian reserve it sounds like the day to day effect on fertility is unclear. As joycep says there are millions of women who get preggers with high fsh. Most of them will never know they have it.

I really hope you are ok, try not to panic. It is still early days for you in ttc terms (I know it doesn't feel it) and there is a good chance you had a cp last month. Things really aren't that bleak yet. Sending a massive hug. Xxxxxx

Hi to moray I also lurked on this board for ages before posting. I second euro's comments. After a year your gp should be offering you a day 21 test and an SA for your OH at the very least. This thread is very supportive and informative.

moray also just wanted to quickly say that I am very much at the same stage as you (am approaching cycle 14) and I have my first nhs consultant appointment on Thursday. I have had the day 21 and my DH has had two SAs. When we first started the process of getting tested it really freaked me out and I got so upset. But a couple of months on I'much happier about it; I feel more in control and I've accepted that if there is a problem, then i need to know about it so I can decide on a way forward. Everything about this process has involved reassessing my expectations, and now I'm really trying to take each step as it comes rather than existing in a state of blind panic! Good luck xxx

wine - 7% is honestly fine for a man. It sounds a scary number but my gynae considers that pretty good. My dh has ranged from 6-8%. Anything above 3% is normal but there have been plenty of people on MN who have got pregnant with their Dh's morph of 1 or 2%.
When I had my fsh and lh levels taken I was given a ratio of 1:1 - i have no idea what that means but i was told that was normal. I don't want to delve deeper as i'm sure mine will be high. My ovarian reserve was done through an AMH blood test on day 3 and that came up at 15 which is satisfactory but 14 is Low! I was subsequently told by my gynae that this is low for my age (i'm 32). hence despair and panic set in (i'm a huge worrier) and hence why i've rushed in to iui. I asked her whether she thought this meant i was going to be going through the menopause soon and she didn't seem to think so but i guess it is a slippery slope.

It's so easy to panic with all this business. Us ladies on this thread probably know far too much about fertility- it would be better if we were in ignorant bliss like most people. But don't think your cp was anything to do with egg quality. They say 70% of fertilised eggs fail before the woman even knows....and that's not going to be down to just egg quality, it could be anything.

Don't get me wrong, I totally understand your worry but you have to remember you are in the normal range. And that's a huge positive. think of all those people in their 40s who get pregnant - they are most likely going to have higher fsh levels than this.

Hello all,

Sorry to hear you've been worrying Wine. I don't know very much about test results, but it's my first appointment with the consultant next week so I might do after that. Hope things work out for you. Hope your appointment goes well too Kitty.

I had my first ttc dream last night, I had a very relaxed consultant in it who didn't want to refer me for a hycosy, as he said it was too invasive. Instead he told me to just to relax & it'd happen, though if I was worried he'd happily arrange for me to have my kidneys tested! . It's clearly getting to me...

I'm on CD 20 today, nothing in the way of symptoms & I've even given up convincing myself that not having symptoms can be a symptom in itself. I really hope that I do get referred for a hycosy & that they find a bit of sludge which they manage to clear from my otherwise perfectly healthy tubes. Here's hoping hey?!

Hello ladies,

Feeling pretty positive today, despite the early arrival of AF, because I've got my appointment date for the fertility clinic. Looks like we're all at the same stage just now, pixie and kitty. Appointment isn't until the beginning of November but I was starting to panic that maybe they'd lost the referral since we hadn't been given a date yet.

Welcome Moray. This is the only place that I've ever posted on MN. The rest of it scares me but I've always felt safe here :)

Hope you're feeling brighter wine and that all of the good advice is helping to ease your worries. It's so easy to jump to conclusions in this business.

Fingers still crossed joycep!

wine I don't really know anything about FSH levels but I agree with all the sensible things already said. Try not to panic until you speak to your gynae. Google throws up so much rubbish, it's best not to look although I know that's easier said than done. Your result was still in the normal range so that's good. I wasn't given my actual result so I have no idea what mine was. Although I know my LH must have been higher because of the PCOS. Sometimes I think it's better not to have the actual numbers unless the Dr is going to explain it properly. I don't think it's right that receptionists should give out results without explanation. Also, 7% morphology is good. Above 3 is normal and it never gets much above 7.

welcome moray. This is a very kind and supportive thread that has helped me so much. Is it possible for you to see another Dr? I thought they were supposed to order tests after 12months. The initial tests are straightforward, just a blood test for you and a sperm sample from your DH. I went after 11 months because I knew something wasn't right when we were SWI lots and everyone else I know manages it within 6 months. My gynae told me that if SWI is well timed then a couple should get pregnant within 6 months. I thought my periods were regular but it turned out that I have PCOS even though I have no signs of it. Also, DH has very low sperm so because we found all this out I feel like we've started the ball rolling much earlier and I'm glad I didn't keep trying before seeking help.

madness sorry about AF but good news on the clinic.

pixie I've had a few ttc dreams. The worst are ones where I actually am pregnant and then I wake up and remember that I'm not .

kitty I agree that finding out what's wrong is important and it sort of does make it easier to deal with when you know what the problem is.

euro congrats to mr euro on the new job

joycep anything happening down there?

I'm 16 dpo according to when I thought I ovulated and when FF thought I ovulated so I did a stupid thing and POAS this morning. BFN of course. I really should learn that I am never going to get a positive and that I shouldn't torture myself. So, I must have ovulated later than I thought because AF still not here and no spotting either. I want it to hurry up and show up now so I can book the HSG. I'm totally fed up today, why oh why can't it happen for us?

Morning all.

CD14 for me and I don't think I have ovulated yet. I'm off to see my acupuncturist shortly so maybe she will help push my egg out.

I've contacted the reproductive immunology clinic I want to go to to make some initial enquiries (such as whether I can self-refer) and plan to make an appointment there for straight after my gynae appointment in November (which I expect to confirm us as "unexplained"). It's a bit scary (not least because it is expensive and the treatments if an issue is found are not exactly appealing) but it will be interesting to see if my theory that that is where the problem lies has any foundation.

Waving at all you lovely ladies! I am just popping by to say that I am keeping more or less track of your stories, but seem to be unable to log in at work. So this is on my mobile, which means no name checking or anything social. Just been thinking of you all. Welcome to the newbie, moray, I think. No news here, CD25 which is nearing the end of my cycle, but I have no idea either way. Been ill and very busy with work lately, so not much chance, really. Sadly DH got ill too and had a fever, which bad news for SA quality. So fingers crossed it was not too bad...

Hi everyone - how are we all doing?

Joycep - especially thinking of you at the moment. Do they give you a date to test or anything after IUI or is it just like any other 2ww? Am really rooting for you in any event.

Also thinking of everyone else too and wishing all lots of luck. Hope the Lemon Drizzle household are all back to full fitness now xx

HI everyone,

I'm doing ok. Im 5dpo now and for the last few hours ive been having really painful cramps low down in my tummy...dont know what to think, maybe im just symptom spotting! Have only really had a few cycles since ttc this time so i dont know if its normal for me.

Hello all,
just checking in quick to wave to you all, have been a bit bogged down with courseworky stuff this week and also trying to sort out my first teaching placement Eek! CD12 here, not ovd yet according to monitor, dh sperm results back at the docs and hes going in on fri to get them of the doc with strict instructions to get all the numbers for me to get dr google and you experts on here to help me interpret :)

wine try not to panic about the FSH, like meow and joycep said, people with high FSH can get preg naturally and have no clue they have it, I think the egg sharing limit makes us all panic, i'm right on the cusp for it and will prob be over by the time I get to intervention stage, I think that they set the level artificially low and it shouldnt be used as an FSH healthy level yardstick IYSWIM?

welcome to moray rose