Relax and It'll Happen- at the BESH Spa

[starcuntmole]

Unwind and rest your weary wombles as we cater to your every relaxation need. If you've been getting stressed about failing to fertilise for what feels like five hundred years, and your follicles aren't getting any younger, we have the perfect combination of treatments to send you on your way uplifted, and updiffed.
Pampering experiences from head to toe, and all the bits in between, whose benefits stem from the combination of nature?s ingredients and our therapists? highly trained hands and tongues.
Feel the all over healing powers of touch, with one of our speciality Cuban massages (rum and cigarring compulsory) , indulge in a volcanic mud-cake wrap or lose yourself in our unique water experiences: gin jacuzzi, turkish delight baths, and enjoy the Sechseny pool staffed by our attentive in house swimmers. Finally treat yourself to a mani/pedi (polishes come in the full range of colours from Clearly Clear to Russet)

Complimentary bar.
Please note: Robes must be worn in all pubic areas.

And it was Cha Cha di Gregorio. Because she was the best dancer at St Bernadette's. With the worst reputation. She was the one who started the race with the flags and also stole Danny at the dance.

I hate Cha Cha. She makes Sandy mizz.

Yeah. Bitch.

But HOW WEAK was Danny at the dance? He just allowed himself to be stolen! What a nob

He just went for the sexier option, the utter bastard. And much as I love the film, it's not like Danny says to her at the end 'Oh it's ok Sandy, you don't have to wear all that sexy gear and learn to smoke just to please me, I've bought a cardigan and have ditched my leather for you instead'.

Danny is pretty weak. He struggles with peer pressure throughout the course of the film

I'll be the woman who works at reception in the school. The old bag who blows that whistle at the dance

Cunty as much as I love Jungle Book not sure the Bare Necessities will really get Mr Sol going but right now I'd give anything a go!

I thought that even when I was young: what kind of message is this film handing out? That you have to change in order to be accepted and attractive?

I was thinking of suggesting Grease as the next Palais theme, but we definitely won't

I like the word priggish. It reminds me of Enid Blyton books like 'Summer Term at St Claire's' and the like.

You see, you have Grease, and then you have the feminist nightmare that is Pretty Woman.

Oh God, Pretty Woman!

Fucking pile of shite

That was the film I went to see on my first proper date. Given that I went on to have one disastrous relationship after another right up until MrBoo I think I'm going to blame it all on that. :o

Agreed. FIm also sees nothing wrong with a rich man kerb crawling and buying a woman for a week. She is supposed to consider herself lucky when he rescues her from her life at the end but hey he will still be shagging prostitutes when he is with her because he thinks women are a commodity for sale.

I am having a fry up. Mmmmmm. God, the weather is shit today. I'm getting fed up of this alleged summer we are supposed to have on an annual basis.

What's it like everywhere else? Kat, where are you?

Pissing down here (South London)

Pissing down here (West London) - school fair day in these parts. Deepest joy.

Im in corby . Its shit here too! Im still not dressed.

I'm not dressed either.

I don't know where Corby is.

Is a small ish town in northamptonshire. No note worthy features. A bit of a dump but nite as bad as utter apparently used to be. It has cheap houses and a primark.

I was born in Northamptonshire. Not in Corby though.

I,also, was going to propose Grease fred, but also realised what a Bad Example it sets our young people. I feel we should do one where difference is celebrated, and we can all achieve our dreams if we fight and try and sing loud enough. So I think we should do Glee. And I think I don't mind being Xixes. (hopes no one sees through my cunning plan of Just trying to sleep with Puck) (remembers it's not real) (bugger)

I analysed Pretty Woman in one of my university courses, it totally ruined it for me. All I cared about before that was the fact I knew most of the lines, and she had really long boots. (On same course we discussed 'The 'Female Gaze' using Thelma and Louise. It mostly consisted of freezing close ups of Brad Pitt's abs, and talking about them. It was a Good Course overall)

I ran 10km at 7.30 am If I don't win a baybee now, I want my lie in back.

I have started all these paragraphs with I.

I am self obsessed.

I am sorry.

Yes I have just seen. Handy for Kettering, Northampton, Leicester, Milton Keynes and even London, thanks to the new high speed rail link.

I assure you that compared to my home town it is a thriving metropolis.

Starry that post has made me larf and larf!

At me or near me?

I like that brown spotty dress she wears.

I like romy & Michelle. Who needs men? Unless to pay for your shop on rodeo drive obv. I want to be heather and get her cowboy boyfriend.

There's also that immortal line about their lives being fantastic until seeing it written on paper. Plus they could teach mariah something about gymwear.

Got to go. My shoe is filling up with blood.

I've only seen Romy and Michelle once but I remember liking it muchly.

Starry, laughing with you not at you

Alps, BLOOD? What? What?