Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 16)

[olismum23]

Hello! If you have recently miscarried and are thinking of or actively trying again come and join us! We offer plenty of cake, tea and wine if needed! Come in and laugh, cry and rant as needed, and don't be afraid of asking whatever questions you need answers to and we'll try our best to answer them.

Add yourself to the stats list whenever you are ready.

wttc = waiting to try to conceive
ucl = usual cycle length
wtf cycle = the time after your mc when you have no idea whats going on with your normal cycle

Lets hope this is a lucky thread and we all get our bfps!

stats to follow

Part 15 here

Hello all,

Now at home after being sent home by my two members of staff.....bless them for looking after me. Got up today feeling not so great (tired, back ache and a bit sickly). Currently sat on the sofa with my hot water bottle hoping to be able to squeeze a nap in before lunch. Having some cramps again and coupled with back pain I'm getting my worried head on all over again!

Feeling a bit worried again....what a roller coaster all of this is!!!

IQ am thinking of you, please try not to worry (I know it's easier said than done) Cosy up and relax on the sofa with a snooze and DVD.xx I have a mug on my desk that says 'I love spreadsheets', it was given by a friend that really knows me! I work as a planner what kind of dogs have you got?

Blue i've been a POAS addict the past couple of cycles but aside from OPKs I deliberately don't have any IC pregnancy tests in the house anymore. I was doing them from 8dpo (ridiculous eh) and got so upset every time I saw a BFN and then would get AF i've decided not to test until 12dpo (if AF hasn't arrived by then). My cycle is definitely WTF this month, I'm so peeved I ov'd 5 days earlier than normal.

eve did you manage to get to the GP? Were you given antib's before?

summer a bath with candles? sounds heavenly!

shimmery how is your kitty cat today?

Squeezed in one more SWI last night (so DTD the day of +OPK and both days after, normally would be concentrating on days before but never mind!). But last night was a bit of an effort as we were both knackered but got there eventually! Fertility friend now reckons I ov'd last Friday (if so i'm deffo out for this month!!) but I think it was more like this weekend, fingers crossed time will tell I guess!

Craving some percy pigs so will be nipping to M&S at lunchtime for my sweetie fix! anybody else fancy some? x

pie I'll take a nose at your chart if you wanna post a link?

IQ Lots and lots of positive thoughts your way

I'm actually thinking I may have to stop ttc. I think several things are pointing to me really not being ready/not over losing DS3. I think, more and more, I just feel I want him back, not a different baby. I've completely and utterly lost my sex drive (and I'm a very, um, like-it-a-lot person!) which I can only assume is some sort of self preservation thing - or that I'm depressed. I do actually think I'm depressed. I don't want to see my gp about it though as all they ever do is prescribe anti-depressants and I really don't want to be on them again.

Don't thnk I've O'd yet, but not sure... but in the horrid place of hoping that IF I have, that I don't get pregnant. GOd, my head's such a fecking mess. I was crying lots last night and again this morning (more connected to DP and I having issues - that I think are probably very much connected to my depressed state) and I just... feel lost. I don't know what to do. I was clinging to ttc as something 'positive' but I think I know it's a mistake.

Sorry for being so 'me' and so down... this probably isn't the right place to say this, but I don't know where else to blurt it out.

manda sending big un-MN hugs for you and a large piece of chocolate fudge cake...but on a more serious note...we're all on this thread for v similar reasons so please feel free to share here...it's important to be able to talk about how you're feeling! Not sure I can offer any great wisdom but some time away from TTC may be exactly what you need giving you time to grieve and work things through with your DP and enjoy time with your DCs without the stress of TTC.

IQ keep resting and try to stay calm if you can (easier said than done I know)

pie percy pigs would be fab thanks

manda i hope this is some consolation but i am in exactly the same place as you. i have been in floods of tears since Saturday (but a bit to say on here but thank you manda for sharing - see we are not alone ) my ishoos are the MC, my grandads death and my friend's recent diagnosis.

I too dont want to see a GP as i also dont want to go on ADs. My sister got too dependent on them and i dont want to take them whilst TTC. My company give 7 free counselling sessions through AXA and i phoned them last night, i am getting a psychological assessment tomos then hopefully the sessions from next week. Is there any way you can get some kind of free/cheap counselling? i am so sorry you are going through this and if you want to talk/share then feel free to PM me. I know exactly how you are feeling (i think). This is why i have dropped my days at work as i need to spend time with DS (when i am with him i am in my 'happy place' ) It is hard trying to work out the things you can control which may make you feel better.

I dont know your MC story, were you quite far on? (i say that as you mention DS3 - did you know it was a boy?). Sorry if i have misunderstood.

pie my DH has that mug! he wanted me to buy it but i encouraged his work mates to buy it for him when he left his old job! i said he could have one but only if he took it to work

IQ massive fingers crossed/hugs/chocolate and PMA heading your way. If this continues then give your local MW a call or go see your GP. It sounds like general new pregnancy symptoms but you have every right to get checked out. Anyway - do let us know what crap TV you are watching today (i do miss my mat leave TV shite i used to watch!)

blue thanks for the choc chip cookie - v nice you mentalling too then? i am convinced i have sore boobies (i dont) i put on 2lb at slimming world last night (obviously a baby) and have been v weepy (see above post) so all in all i too am mentalling but need to hold my nerve. just like pie I was also doing POAS at 8DPO but really need to wait for 13DPO to get some real perspective

waves to everyone else - hope you are all having a good day - marathon how is rainy center parcs, you in the pub yet?

Thanks for all your thoughts ladies!!!!

As for Manda don't worry about being 'me' we all have them at time....there is so much more to all of us on this thread than TTC. Were all here for that reason but we are whole people, with lives and laughs, good times, problems to share. We are here to support each other in very difficult circumstances and build each other up after being knocked so far left its hard to think of ever getting back onto the path that your life used to be on.

If you feel depressed - don't blame yourself - being depressed is not in anyway a crime, you have nothing to be ashamed of and this is the perfect place to express yourself. Sometimes you don't feel confident telling your family or even close friends how you feel but sitting behind a screen name allows us all to feel that we can be 100% honest.

TTC is stressful to say the least - don't put pressure on yourself to feel fine or be fine - you have lost something so precious and all of us here to a degree understand how dark that makes life. But only you know how you feel inside, no matter what happens you have a DP and DC who love you and you have all of us here. And being honest you couldn't ask for a better group of ladies behind you - so here is a massive hug from all of us to you.
Xxxx

Yes...mentalling but trying not too! Heavy feeling in uterus, stuffy nose when I wake up, hormonal, just had sharp stabbing pain around left ovary, no EWCM, not sleeping well... first AF after MC would almost be as welcome as a BFP at the moment just so that I know where I am with everything!

Thank you all so much for such lovely words - particularly summer for sharing her woes too that made me feel a bit more normal like I wasn't a complete loon.

Can I just completely push my stuff aside for a moment (classic 'me' coping strategy - pretend it's not happening ) and say for all of you who are mentalling... can we go back to you metalling? It was such a fun mental image to think of you all with black and white face make up, leather jackets, tour t-shirts, grimey denims, headbanging with 'horn' fists punchin the air.

YY i preferred the metalling too. Wanted to swing my non existent greasy locks in front of my face whilst in a mosh pit, waving a CB digital

Ha ha metalling! I did it deliberately to make you all laugh, obviously.

Sending big hugs to Manda, I would definitely see a counsellor if you can. I had counselling once and it was so good for working things through.

Positive vibes and cyber hugs to so many of you, seems like today is a hard day all round for many thread-mates (is that a term? Didn't know what to call us all).

Passing round chocolate hobnobs, which I have taken way too much of a liking too in recent days.

No real news for me. Got some SWI in last night and now hubby away until Thursday night. Not sure where I am with my cycle but if it is 30 days, as I was (mostly) pre MMC, my next AF will be due next Monday. Don't think we got enough SWI in this month, especially with the extra long AF and nothing resembling pregnancy symptoms so far. I didn't expect to get lucky though so no real feelings of disappointment.

Right ladies back pain has become increasingly worse - spoken to the out of hours GP and he has booked me in at the local minor injuries. Possibly cyatica (spelling ?) but small concern of ectopic pg.....genuinely feeling very worried now...wish hubby was home he would know the right thing to say!!!

Will update on my return - hoping all is ok!!!

Xxxx

Hi all.
Wondered if i could join (If i can keep up as you are a fast moving bunch)

MC for the 6th time last week. Bleeding now stopped. Wanted to try again as soon as possible so we have begun, obviously very very nercous and frightened.

Any tips or hints would be great at this moment in time. Thanks x

IQ - so sorry to hear that - when are you going to the minor injuries unit?

Mrsnesbit - welcome aboard although so sorry for all your losses. Fingers (though definitely not legs) crossed that better luck is heading your way.

I've been popping by for a month or so and I don't know what I'd have done without this lot.

IQ hope you get some answers and an end to the pain v soon! Really hoping not ectopic too! Take good care...

Welcome Mrsnesbit also so sorry to hear of your losses, hopefully we can be good listening ears as you move forward.

I'm so so tired tonight...could just be the late night last night or for another reason?! I could barely keep my eyes open this afternoon at work! DH is fast asleep on the sofa so think bed might be calling us both v soon but seriously no energy for any SWI action!

Panic over (until tomorrow when I start metalling about something else)

Been to see out of hours Dr who was very nice and understanding about my post MC current pg concerns. She asked me whether I "felt pg".....kind of looked at her and said "not really sure what pg feels like - so far I've had chest pain, insomnia, freaky dreams and now this back problem". She looked at me and said "mmmm this baby does seem to be putting you through it a bit - it will all be worth it in the end". Bless her for keeping my spirits up, currently feel like an OAP!!!

She doesn't think it ectopic (thank god) but thinks I have a disk problem in my lower back - have some stuff to put on it and drugs to take. hopefully is just inflamed and not a more serious problem but have to go to GP if not better in 3 days!!! Oh dear - well how is everyone else doing tonight then?

Welcome mrsnesbit - obviously not for a great reason but I have found this a fantastic thread full of supportive women......but yes things tend to move quickly here - you will get used to the pace!!!

Xxx

It ate my reply again!!!! Just a quick on as I wanted to answer Manda post. Firstly though

IQ - so glad you are ok. What a lovely thing for the doctor to say. Hope you are getting lots of rest and taking it easy.

Mrs Nesbit - sorry that you have join this thread, I hope that you have lots of good people around you for support at this difficult time. Look after yourself.

Manda - you are not alone in the way you are feeling. I am the same. Wondering if we should both ttc. Although v sad I just can't get away from the feeling i wanted that baby we lost. I really did not think we would get pg being older and on the pill etc. I am sure in time these feelings will fade. You stay strong and look after yourself.

Well as for me, I am feeling much better today. so that was all a bit strange have decide it is one of several things. I still have an infection (although no pain today). I am about to have the mother of all periods. Or it is something else going on. My off the wall idea is it might be implantation pain - have been hanging round here to much :-) So I will just wait and see.

Hope everyone is ok. Sorry not to mention everyone need to do some work! Have a good day it is nearly the weekend.

IQ glad everything is ok - i just read that like a rollercoaster as i havent been on since yesterday. Hopefully it is 'just' sciatica (sp?) and you can get some rest. Sounds like a lovely GP though

welcome mrsnesbit so sorry to hear you are going through this again, 6 times is harsh, but yes we are a welcoming bunch.

went round to my friends last night, 8 of us drinking and i feel baaaaad, in a way i hope i am not PG as i have prob given bean an alcohol addiction already

crossed posts eve glad you are feeling better today, maybe the thrush had something to do with it? and maybe the medication has cleared it for you. ah well - onwards and upwards

IQ so glad to hear that she doesn't think it's ectopic...and that she was nice and encouraging too! Hope the pills kick in soon and the back thing doesn't turn out to be anything more serious...did you sleep ok last night? Are you in work today or resting and taking it easy?

I checked back through my TTC diary from the start of the year and it would seem that there was a pattern of me getting cramps on and off for a week before AF came (which I had forgotten about as this only started when I came off the pill late last year) I then checked and this also happened the month I did get a bfp so as usual there is still no sign eitherway! At least I can tell myself that the cramps I have are 'normal' which I suppose is a good thing!

How's everyone else this morning? Nearly half way though the week already Anyone in need of a caffeinated and decaf available!!

Hello ladies, got 5 mins of peace... and breathe...

Welcome mrsnes! This is great bunch as the others have said. Do you have any DCs already? Have you had any tests to investigate all the mcs?

IQ hope you're feeling better? What a nightmare you're having. Is your scan on Sat? I bet that's playing on your mind.

summer get a fry up sharpish!

blue when will you POAS?

No news here, no symptoms so starting to worry. Off to the mosh pit to metal a bit more...

Hello to everyone I've missed where's missg gone??

marathon hope you're having a good holiday? Am holding off until the weekend before I POAS...if AF not here by then I'll give it a whirl and see...have a project deadline on Friday so hopefully that will keep me suitably distracted for the next few days speaking of which I should get back to work...was really looking forward to a break from this place from Dec so the MC really mucked that up which means I'm still stuck here until who knows when and don't feel I should move jobs as where I am is far too convenient for home and I know everyone and would feel bad taking a new job and then asking for mat leave it that all happened...oh dear...note to self...stop thinking about work and just get on with it!

Blue I read your post and thought it was me talking!

I really don't like my job anymore and was banking on the year off from December. Now not having that is making me really miserable but as we are TTC I don't want to leave as if I left and then got a BFP I would have no maternity pay with a new employer.

We given ourselves a deadline of December. If I'm not up the duff by then, I will look for another job as I can't put it off forever.

whatso and marathon i am in the same situ too! I was supposed to be going on mat leave over August Bank Holiday and was looking forward to my year off. We too have given a deadline of christmas and if i am not preggy then we might stop TTC and look at other job options etc

i am metalling over here in the mosh pit yes yes i am 7DPO and have a sore right boob and am getting AF type cramps (which is too early for AF). Now i had all this last month so am not metalling too much