Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 16)

[olismum23]

Hello! If you have recently miscarried and are thinking of or actively trying again come and join us! We offer plenty of cake, tea and wine if needed! Come in and laugh, cry and rant as needed, and don't be afraid of asking whatever questions you need answers to and we'll try our best to answer them.

Add yourself to the stats list whenever you are ready.

wttc = waiting to try to conceive
ucl = usual cycle length
wtf cycle = the time after your mc when you have no idea whats going on with your normal cycle

Lets hope this is a lucky thread and we all get our bfps!

stats to follow

Part 15 here

oh dear i am going to get flamed for my comment on here but i dont give a rats ass

[scared emoticon]

Afternoon all...thanks for the marathon and well done for getting to zumba...I'm impressed! I did manage my salsacise DVD this morning though I was half asleep when I started doing it - it was 6:30am so I guess that's understandable! Not sure there'll be any SWI until friday unfortunately but then it's the weekend which is good! Having said all of that no CM today so maybe I did Ov in the last few days...if so we might've missed it unless the swimmers from Friday were a hardy bunch and managed to hang in there for a few days If it was ov then maybe I can start to expect AF in the next 10-14 days...

My EPU/docs said that I will be offered an early scan at 8 weeks next time so think we will try and be patient and wait for that when the times comes.

summer I'm sure your friend will enjoy the abfab! and glad the SWI is on schedule!

Ooh...just seen the time...must crack on with my work! Catch up later!

Hello all [waves]!

Summer - you certainly weren't the only one on that thread saying that, I think the OP will come round fairly quickly and will be glad of your comments. She even asked for sense to be knocked into her. I feel sorry for her in a way though, I can't imagine having family say "shame it's a girl" or words to that effect. I know when I was born my family were rooting for a girl as I am the only girl on my mum or dad's side of my generation (9 boy cousins and a brother) but only in a jolly way - no way would anyone have expressed disappointment if I was a boy.

And here we all are just longing for a human being of any variety to call our own....

SWI going well so far this week and DH not going away tomorrow night (leaving very early in the morning instead) so that's an extra day to squeeze some action in! May even have spotted EWCM although I think I may be inventing ovulation/fertility symptoms now through sheer force of will.

I'm also interested in this sperm meets egg plan...what is it?

In the meanwhile I will carry on with the shagging at least once every two days where possible (ie in the same place together), taking my vitamins and crossing my fingers. But only my fingers, mind you.

summer just read your post on the other thread - couldn't agree with you more. Well done for saying that - it needed to be said.

Like so many of you it would seem I have just found out that one of my friends is expecting her second - she had her 12 week scan this week which means she and I would have been due within days of each other .

I am so pleased for her, I know she's had a rough time she had her DC1 through IVF and when trying for 2nd she had a round of IVF that ended in mmc so it is absolutely bloody fantastic news that all is well for her at 12 weeks but can't help feeling a little down knowing I would have been happily announcing my news this week too....

Sorry for post. Generally feeling quite upbeat these days but sometimes it just gets me.

poppy this thread is all about the days and the days so dont worry. you are displaying all the 'normal' signs in that you are so happy for your friend and yet so sad for yourself. this is the place to vent

(knew i would get a flaming on the other thread but i stood by my post - eek)

whatso yay for an extra SWI opportunity! i too am inventing EWCM - or am i? is it real? i guess that given some of us were getting AF in the last couple of weeks that our EWCM is synched too! eeee they do say that women who work together get AF synchronisation - does that work on MN too?

blue are you 'mentalling' by any chance?

poppy I know how you feel. I just found out my workmate is due in January - like I was. She is craving gherkins and salt and vinegar crisps - just like I'd started to do. I'm happy for her, but at the same time all I can think is "that was supposed to be me". And then I feel like an evil witch .

Can I ask those who have continued checking for OV, temping, etc - have your cycles changed significantly? DH and I have started trying again by dtd on days 8, 10, 12, 13, 14 and 16, which would cover my usual OV of day 13, but now I'm wondering if it's just not enough.

I would temp, etc, but I can't seem to face it.

shimmery my cycles were always 28 days exactly (ie get AF on the Friday and the next AF would be on the Friday 4 weeks later)

However now my cycles are shorter which is obv good for my nerves! Last month i got AF on the Saturday and the next one CD26 days later on the Thursday. Also i got AF last monday (04/07) and am already getting EWCM and i detect a stabbing pain in my ovary which denotes OV.

However i know some people on here have had 36-42 day cycles (which must be a nightmare and i feel for you ). I dont know whether that has changed post MC. Mine are certainly shorter now after mine.

i know my DH will be of your DH for getting it 6 times a month!

He's certainly not complaining...

Hi all,

Poppy totally understand where you're coming from. I expect we all know that feeling that's why this is the best place to share It'll be you soon, don't you worry, hopeful we can all lose the plot together with all the mentalling.

whatso here's the smep: www.pregnancyloss.info/sperm_meets_egg_plan.htm DH and I were going to try it next cycle but even by DH's standards (he likes the sexy time) it sounds exhausting! A 40% chance of conception isn't bad though. Having said that the "normal" chance if you dtd every other day is 33% so it doesn't make a massive difference.

Shimmery my cycles changed post pregnancy with dd, they were slightly longer and I had spotting a few days before my AF was due. I suppose having a mc is the same so things can change.

Summer - oh sweetie dahhhrling loving AbFab!

summer trying to stay calm over here even though I am clearly a total control freak not very patient and would just really like to know what's going on in there - the WTF cycle is driving me loopy! Trying to keep a calm exterior but inside (and on MN) not quite so calm at all - you girls get all my questions and probably save me from DH getting v irritated at my less-than-calmness!

poppy I have just discreetly clarified the due date of my pregnant colleague and turns out it's the same week I would've been due but again trying to stay calm

marathon thanks for the link. The cycle that I got pregnant last time I think we inadvertently followed that plan. We were DTD every 2 days and DTD three days in a row roughly when we thought I was ovulating to make up for the fact we'd had friends to stay for two nights so hadn't done it!

I will give it a couple of months and if nothign happens may give it a try. I'm not a fan of POAS ovulation tests though, we tried them for two months and foung them stressful as it rendered SWI on days with no positive result a bit pointless which seemed a shame.

summer so sorry to hear about your friend - hope your gifts give her a little bit of a lift. Also feel free to unload here - I agree with pie, it cant all be about TTC on here. Loved your reply on that thread......utterly brilliant and spot on!!!

pie just having a scan done now as didn't think the blood test would have been worth the cost. Also agree with the other ladies, you should tell your friend. Yes she will be sad for you but she will be glad that you told her the truth.

marathon how are you doing today? I think it will be about 6 weeks on the scan date but cos of no AF not really sure. DH goes away 3rd week of august. Really glad about pg but still freaking out massively - stressing over tomorrow cos lost the last one at that point as well......been cramping and had twinges for 2 days so been resting as much as I can. I know it's out of my hands but currently keeping everything crossed for a good outcome!! Agree with you - don't really feel pg - other than the sore boobs.

Whatsoever sounds like a good plan.....hope your SWI continues to go well....will keep everything crossed for you.

poppy dont worry about the sad posts - all of us are like that.....you feel really upbeat but things just knock you at times.

shimmery I like your style.....when we were trying 'hard' (before MC) I would pounce on hubby at every turn.....he complained at one point that I would "wear it down to a nub" if I carried on.....it didn't stop me but it did make me laugh!!!

Hubby has just bought me a plate of fruit and my pregnacare tablets......at least one of us has any memory . Couldn't remember loads of words today at work, went round the one way car park the wrong way today, woke up between 3 and 6 this morning and had two horrendous/scary dreams. I think the lack of sleep is finally getting to me!!!!

I'm having period style cramps - no bleeding so far but it's like a hot/burning sensation down low!!! It's not painful but it's uncomfortable and feeling really worried that it's all happening all over again.

Feeling so right now!!!

Don't panic IQ AF cramps are very normal (as our lovely friends on here told me earlier in the week). Get some rest and try to forget about it (impossible I know), I'm sure all will be well in the morning.

PMA, stay strong, we're all with

sends a virtual hand to hold

you ok IQ? holding your hand but am sure it is all perfectly normal

having to trawl through MN to find this thread now the 'threads i am on' is buggered!

IQ - before the MC my DH did once say "but it might fall off..." when I suggested we try every day for 8 days running. He rose to the challenge admirably though .

I hope everything is OK. Try to rest up and not panic, and know we're thinking of you.

Hi all,

Back from France yesterday after epic journey home involving being soaked through to underwear in apocalyptic thunder & lightening storm on way to train station (at 6am), missing airport shuttle connection by half an hour due to train being delayed (sorted by my fab DH who called the bus company and doing his shmoozing (he's in sales) and getting them to come back for us), flight then diverting to another airport due to weather and us having to be bussed to yet another airport 2 hours away to get another flight. And this was all after a very late and boozy night ending with one final fully-clothed jump in the villa pool at 2am!

Have been trying to catch up, but a lot has been happening, so please forgive me not name-checking. Except .........MASSIVE congrats to Marathon and IQ !!!! Am whooping as I type! That is fabulous news. The PMA is obviously doing its rounds. Hope you are managing to stay relatively sane at the moment though although I suspect not. I have everything crossed (well, not everything - see para below ) for these little easter beans.

Didn't let evil AF spoil my hol. Was very light and only lasted 3 days (cue, more POAS) so got down to some steamy practice SWI in the massive (and totally awesome) Porcelenosa shower we had in our room .... on several occasions (there's just something about being on holiday in the heat....)

DD is back on Saturday, have missed her loads, but have spoken to her every day. Dreading the phonebill coming in now!

Off to pick up my nephew now. Will catch up properly later.

Happy Thursday everyone!

glad you had a good holiday, am at your shower action loving your strength and fortitude in getting home in one piece too!

someone made me a coffee earlier and i couldnt drink it obsessing already but it is only 1DPO so i am getting a little bit ahead of myself!

Hello MissG! Good to see you're back and had a good time. I'm impressed with your shower antics, we've done that a couple of times and always ended up swearing we'd never do it again, having sprained a muscle slipping mid thrust! Could have been much worse I suppose Know what you mean about hot holidays, it always seems to turn the switch on for me too.

IQ where are you? We're worrying about you, come and tell us you're ok.

Summer can I have that coffee? DH is away at the moment and DD was up practically all night with her teeth. I'm soooo blinkin' tired! Can't believe I want to have another one to keep me up all night Off on hols tomorrow with DH's DCs. A week with three kids Doesn't sound like much of a hol to me, think it's going to be exhausting.

No symptoms here so still in denial. I did a CB test yesterday and it's gone up to 2-3 weeks since conception so there must be some hormones there.

Hello Shimmery, Whatso, Poppy and everyone else waves

Afternoon all, thanks for your kind words and hand holding. Had a look on the NHS website and they suggested drinking water, which I did and that sorted me out a treat. Had a pint and a half and the burning and cramps went away - have been keeping myself topped up at work today to stave off any pains......so far so good.

Hubby is on a course all week where he is meant to be 'preparing mentally for his time away'....they have a bonding session tonight (meal and drinks) which means he is staying over - gutted. He will be 'in the field' literally next week for two weeks so wont be able to come to scan with me - very but sis is coming so i don't have to go alone. Bless him for his sweet ways though - he made me promise this morning that I would send regular updates via text and ring him if i needed anything and not try to be strong on my own if i needed him even a little bit. Pg has definitely bought out the best in my husband!!!

MissG welcome back after a marathon journey home - pleased you had a really good time with lots of 'special' time with DH!!!

Marathon glad to see your hormones are on the increase. How long since doing your last one? I'm waiting until next week to do my other one - then hopefully mine will have also increased....keeping fingers crossed!!!

summer I'm enjoying your obsessing it makes me feel less alone!!!

Hi to all waves - hope your all enjoying the count down until friday!!!

Evening all.

Hope everyone is well. This thread moves so fast.

IQ - hope you are ok, soon the weekend for you to rest up

Miss G glad you are home safe and sound sounds like a wonderful holiday.

Summer hope your friend enjoys the ab fab. Really is a classic. Very thoughtful of you and I am sure she will appreciate them.

Off topic - just had screaming match with DP. Ds would not do as he was told, I wanted to get him in the car, home and sent to his room. We were only round the corner. DP shouting and DS shouting and getting smacked bum.

I tried to calm things but got shouted at so shouted back. He has gone out now. As it is all my fault.

Going to get DS to bed early and follow him. So fed up today.

sorry :-(

Hi Peeps,

It does move fast!

eve sorry to hear you've had a bad day. Sending some {hugs} hopefully DP will have calmed down by the time he gets home. It's so easy to get caught up in the moment isn't it when the little ones are screaming! x

IQ Glad to hear all is well and you won't have to go to the scan on your own! It will be nice to have somebody's hand to hold!

marathon Fabby news about the hormones increasing!! I am also utterly exhausted today as have been awake since 4.45am! I woke up and just couldn't get back to sleep as my mind was racing, typically DS then didn't wake up until 6.45am so I could have had a decent lie-in! Thursday night is my night 'off' duties but I was too tired to go out -booo! Where are you going on hols?

summer 1DPO, whoop! I am still about 7 days away (if my cycle is regular that is) from actually ovulating! Am relieved have got a few days yet though as DP is quite unwell with a stomach upset at the moment and definitely not up to SWI. IKWYM about coffee! After the m/c I actually weaned myself off it and my daily diet coke. Don't feel any better for it mind you! I think somebody posted a link to the SMEP above :)

missg your journey home sounds very eventful but all that SWI would have made it worthwhile! I can't remember the last time the shower was used in that fashion in our house!

shimmery 8 days running !! I am very impressed! That's a lot more than the SMEP asks (basically DTD every other day from CD10 (if you ovulate mid-cycle), then for 3 days after postive OPK, miss a day, then once more for good measure)

Hi to whats, poppy, blue and anybody else i've missed! I still get down days too :(

I had lunch with my friend today and told her what had happened. She was, of course, brilliant and said she'd had bleeding at 6 weeks so went to the EPU but was a hematoma in her uterus so harmless. Am so glad i've told her. I found out today that another friend had a m/c too so that makes at least 6 friends, horrible horrible horrible!

Better dash, DS out of the bath and running around wet refusing to have a towel near him! x

eve here you go me and DH always have our worst rows over DS, we both get v irrational too.

pie sooooo glad you told your friend, bet that is a weight off your shoulders, thats what friends are for, there for the good and the not so good times

marathon here is the coffee might be a bit cold now but you can whack it in the microwave for a minute - that should do the trick. and yay for your HCG! soooo excited for you

IQ good tip on the iced water, seems to have done the trick then.

well i spotted some bona fide EWCM tonight so looks like today is OV day i guess i was completely ahead of myself but all good as me and DH are ready and raring to go with the SWI - he was on the lash last night i need to check out that SMEP - although if it involves temps then that is faaaar too technical for me!

i had to hide that thread in pregnancy in the end, some of the posters were getting so nasty about us who had lost babies or had still births (calling us attention seeking and 'tales of woe') it all got a bit offensive and i dont have the energy to defend myself! (seems a troll got her way on there too - wonder what she was saying - the posts were all deleted)

right off to drag DH away from his gardening and for some action

Hi to all!!!

eve sorry to hear about your argument with DP.....sometimes tempers get frayed and you just have to blow your top and then things settle back down again. Hope it doesn't take too long to get back to normal!! Xx

pie glad you were able to share what's been happening with your friend. Life is so much better with good friends around.

summer hope you had some 'productive' time with DH.....shall be keeping fingers crossed for some more BFP's next month!!! Yeah the water has sorted me out a treat - tried ice, warm and normal tap temperature - found the tap stuff the most effective.

With drinking lots of water I've stopped the cramps but my stomach is HUGE.....it is big and round and hard. Not sure if this is bloating due to pg or just because my body isn't used to this much liquid. Before pg only needed about 3 drinks a day - I just never felt thirsty - now I'm having about 4/5 pints.....the toilet and me are getting very well acquainted....again not sure if this is to do with the pg or just my extra water intake. But unlike many people on my Facebook, who I think I should start deleting, I refuse to complain.

Sending super fertility vibes to all those SWI and calming thoughts to everyone on the WTF cycle and chilled feeling to everyone else who is waiting to try again or waiting for OV day. Thank you all for your support!!
Xxx