Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 16)

[olismum23]

Hello! If you have recently miscarried and are thinking of or actively trying again come and join us! We offer plenty of cake, tea and wine if needed! Come in and laugh, cry and rant as needed, and don't be afraid of asking whatever questions you need answers to and we'll try our best to answer them.

Add yourself to the stats list whenever you are ready.

wttc = waiting to try to conceive
ucl = usual cycle length
wtf cycle = the time after your mc when you have no idea whats going on with your normal cycle

Lets hope this is a lucky thread and we all get our bfps!

stats to follow

Part 15 here

marathon I was paranoid enough last time that people were going to figure it out, let alone now that they all know we'll be trying this time! But at least I think everyone (hopefully) will have the sense to keep their suspicions to themselves before asking the question so I guess we just have to be thick skinned about what others might be thinking! Not totally easy though.

missG glad to hear your holiday coming round soon - here's hoping AF comes along way before then

Hi All (including all who were so nice to me on my MC thread :) ) I've come to join you.

I've been postponing due to not getting a BFN until now (didn't want to start trying until my hormones had settled down), but this morning it was finally here. I've another couple of weeks to wait for AF (so I understand) but I fancy getting started anyway.

I've even started (and half completed) the 30 day shred in preparation - and to try and lose my excess weight. I will succeed!

Blue its taken 3 weeks for me to get a negative. I hope yours comes soon.

So sorry I'm not keeping up; been feeling rather negative (blah, blah). You know how it is. Really felt in limbo and that I was waiting for something that wasn't going to happen but...

Marathonmama You and I are clearly going to be cycle buddies as I got a positive OPK today!

So now hopefully I can pay you all a leeetle more attention rather than obsessing panicking wallowing being so insular.

Who am I kidding? The TWW without obsessing? But I won't be so down

Oh, only used opks once before marathonM in December and O'd the day after my positive. As I understand it, depending on which part of the srge you've caught, you have between 12 and 36 hours until you O. Really hope you've caught the beginning giving you the chance to somehow hop on DH, as it were. Failing that, can he get UPS or someone to collect and deliver a sample as a very express delivery... I jest kinda

Only thing I'm a bit about it we'd SWI'd ourselves out - every day from cd11-16 when the novelty had clearly worn off and we were knackered A couple of days off, then this morning... followed by positive opk this afternoon. So we haven't covered as many prior days-in-a-row as I'd have liked...

ANYWAY! blue Your MD sounds like a sweetheart. I really miss that kind of person in the workplace (especially after working fo the home office where everything is sooooo politically correct and everyone is trained to within an inch of their lives in diversity and not offending people to the point were you literally are scared to say anything to anyone. You lose the true human element that makes life...life.) And when I say workplace, I haven't worked for a few years now, but y'know what I mean?

missG My af turned up about a week after my negative test (so not long enough for it to be a true hormonal cycle but nce of my body to keep things ticking over 'on time' as that's when af was due to show, give or take). I hope you find similar so that your holiday can be filled with lots of holiday swi free of having to lug tampons with you!

welcome, welcome.

It feels really good for us all to be starting this together... here's hoping for lots of bfps soon.

Blue what a sweet MD. My big boss doesn't have any children and frowns upon discussions about dogs and kids!!!

MissG feeling very jealous of your break away....hope it's very relaxing and enjoyable for you.

Mandahugnkiss brilliant name.....has put a big on my face!!!

On the issue of SWI - have also found the same problem. We try to get as many days in as possible but always find ourselves tired out by 3rd or 4th day......annoyingly though can guarantee that as soon as we stop the the next day I OV!!!

Big hello to all of the returning ladies!!!

Xxxx

Bit and fed up...was feeling 'in the mood' and was just getting myself sorted/ready when I found out I'd just bled again...and more than anytime in the last few days and a few clots too (sorry TMI) totally put me off DTD and I'd really though the bleeding had finished a few days ago so rather miffed with everything this evening! Roll on getting all of this out and finished and a bfn so that I can feel more 'normal' once more...in fact would be nice to get to AF so that I properly know where I am!

Shimmery I looked up the 30 day shred thing...you're v v brave...looks like the workout from hell! Think I'd collapse in a heap if I tried it!

manda glad you're feeling a bit more positive, I think being up and down is normal with all of this to deal with...go easy on yourself but feel free to let it all out on here! (says BlueCrane after having a rant herself!!)

Oh Blue you poor thing. I can completely relate to how you're feeling, you want your body back and to have some control again. I was the same with all my random bleeding and felt so relieved when AF finally arrived. Hope you get back to normal soon. If the bleeding is heavy it might be worth calling the EPU or your doc?

Oooh cycle buddies Manda how exciting! The 2ww is nearly upon us! I'm going to try not to obsess about it as chances are low but know that in 13 days' time I'm going to be all over the place. At least I'll have company

It won't be helped by the fact that I normally get some spotting up to a week before my AF that I'll be convinced is implantation bleeding. Grrrr, why isn't this easy?

I'm begging that egg not to dodge all the (half dead) sperm.

It sounds like you did a pretty good job of covering the bases, even if you did miss a couple of days. According to the smep, you're supposed to dtd for three consecutive days on the day of and after the +ve OPK result. Other websites though say it's more important to dtd in the days preceding the +ve, so who's right I wonder? We'll be flat out (literally) if we try to do it all.

It is nice to have lots of other people to talk to who are in the same boat. Let's hope for BFPs soon. Then we can all stress about scans....

Nice to meet you Shimmery, sorry you're here but pleased too (IYKWIM!)

Waves to MissG, Insomnia, Whatso and anyone I've missed

It's Friday so all round!

sounds good even if it isn't yet 10am thanks marathon

Feeling a little better this morning, had a few cramps last night too which I wasn't v pleased about but it's not heavy bleeding more like brown water with some clots (sorry TMI) so hoping it's the dregs of what's left to come out!

So glad it's friday though...am soooo tired...but have my brother SIL and 8month old nephew coming to stay for the weekend! Really looking forward to seeing them though and it will be a good distraction from everything...am wondering how our 2 bed flat is going to survive a just crawling mini person though!!

Blue sorry to hear that - very similar to what happened to me. I kept bleeding (one day heavy enough for pads but mainly just at pantyliner level) for about 5 or 6 days when it started again but it does seem to have stopped for good since then. On the plus side, this last bit of bleeding will probably result in you getting your BFN and beign able to move on with the SWI!

I haven't POAS yet (forget this morning until it was too late) but will give it a go tonight to make sure I've got my BFN.

marathonmama waves back!

And hello all - thank heavens it's Friday! Watching Glasto on telly tonight with wine and a pizza and then another wedding tomorrow for me. With a nice hotel stay so hopefully some more action - although I will be wearing spanx to fit into my dress so I better remember to do a quick change in the bathroom before DH sees me or there will be absolutely no chance of any action.

LOL at the spanx whatsoever enjoy the wedding and the hotel SWI!!

Am definitely hoping that this latest bit of bleeding/dregs will bring along a bfn!!

Good morning all

I am back on the sofa AGAIN!!! Back to work on Monday so making the most of it and ignoring the house work!

blue - sorry to hear you are so up in the air, think we all understand how that feels, just as the bleeding slows down and you think you are getting back on track and then it starts up again. see it as your body getting back to normal. Hope you enjoy having the visitors.

Whatso ever - I have thse very same knickers :-) very sexy they are too. Enjoy the wedding.

Shimmerypixie good luck with the shred it looks like to much hard work for me.

All of those who are DTD you go girls - can't wait to get back to it, but there is part of me that thinks I should just not go there in case it all happens again. Not getting any younger!!!

On the upside I can do something about my weight - so the poor dog has been dragged out for a long walk this morning.

Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Blue It's bloody frustrating, non? In my second cycle , af had left some three days previous, and I was due to go on holiday in a couple of weeks (went to Greece in May) so I opened the 30 Day Shred dvd touted on my post natal thread as 'Amazing!' to find that into my second set of jumping jacks I'd started bleeding full flow again! I just took that as a sign that I wasn't ready for any heavy duty exercise even though I was five weeks after erpc and consigned the dvd to the drawer where it still languishes.

eve I'm sure the dog loved it, really. DP has a dogue de bordeux (aka The Turner and Hooch Dogs) but she has to live at his mums as we just don't have the room here. We He walks her every day, though.

Temp dip this morning that usually signals O for me - should officially be in the tww tomorrow... not feeling hopeful though. Apart from only managing yesterday (today has been far too busy and DP is at his Mums with his DD tonight) I have this horrible probably irrational fear that my tubes will have been blocked by the induction. TMI alert - the baby delivered in a clot the size of a bowling ball.It was shockingly huge. And my logic thinks if my uterus was filled with blood (as the size of the clot suggests it must have been) then the tubes could have been filled with blood too? I asked my doctor about it and she was unsure whether it would have and whether the clots would just eventually be reabsorbed but did offer to send me for a hsg if 'nothing happened' after a few months of ttc (she knows I usually fall very quickly - DD - 1st month, DS1 - a single condom accident, DS2 - 2nd month (aged 35), DS3 - 1st month (aged 37))

See manda that's as good an excuse as any for me not to try the 30 day shred dvd which I'd already concluded might be way too energetic for me at the moment!! So so sorry to hear about your MC experience though! Have no idea re. implications for tubes etc but would've thought they would be willing to check everything a little earlier than if nothing has happened in a few months!!

Right...I'm off to sort out the flat ready for family arrival later this evening...really hoping my lovely nephew sleeps well tonight and doesn't wake us all up super early in the morning as I'm shattered after first week back at work and could do with a bit of a lie in probably unlikely.

Happy friday night all

just a quick one did test this evening - know it should be morning but have done previous test pm.

It was a BFN in the bathroom, but when I took it to the light of the window there was a very faint line.

So what do you girls think???

eve just back read a little - you had your mc on 10th June? How many weeks were you?

It seems lots of us here were still getting faint positives two weeks afterwards (and in my case, even longer at over three weeks). It's such a confusing time.

eve remind me where you're up to in your cycle with relation to MC? If no chance it could be a hangover from MC then I'd test again in the morning and see what it shows...here's hoping good news for you!!!

I just ordered indian takeaway (well, delivery, technically). Is it too soon, as my O day, to say the baby made me do it?

Yes, I think so too. Gah.

The future baby made me do it?

That reminds me, I still haven't read The Time Travellers Wife (planned too, having heard good things). Infact, I've only read one single book since DS2 was born just over 15months ao which is woeful considering I used to devour book upon book before him.

Morning all

Thank you for the replies - the line got darker over the next few hours. MC 2 weeks ago - wishful thinking to get it behind me. I have a scan on Tuesday morning so will leave it til after then and hopefully get BFN.

Never brought so many test - Tesco's shares will rocket.

HugNkiss go for the curry just put it down to your hormones.

Have a great weekend everyone.

eve hope all becomes clear at the scan on Tuesday...damn these hormones!

I had more 'dregs' last night including some large bits which wasn't so pleasant (sorry TMI) but seem to have fitted back into my one of my pre-pg/mc bras this morning which is very exciting as was wondering if it would ever happen!! Loving having my nephew staying but has made me quite that I could've been introducing him to my bump and looking forward to introducing him to his cousin at Christmas just got to keep hoping and trusting that it will all work out next time around and that it won't be too long before I can introduce him to a bump/cousin!

Happy Saturday all...

blue it's not pleasent to carry on losing 'stuff' at this juncture BUT it's much better that your body is doing it itself rather than not.

And, yes, the sad moments for what now isn't, and what might have been are completely normal. DP and I had one when we were walking the dog the other day, talking about her going to be neutered next week. He said he'd have liked a litter from her but see previous post about space constraints - it's just not possible. He was then saying he couldn't imagine her as a mother as she still seems so puppyish even though she's fully mature but that it was just 'maternal instinct', wasnt it? I pipe up with 'nobody ever expected me to have kids when I was younger, I just didn't seem to have a maternal bone in my body' and he laughed 'Yeah, just look, now you have three!' To which I quietly responded I had had four. THen he got all sad and said 'I know, I haven't forgotten' And he squeezed my hand and we walked in silence for a while, lost in our own thoughts (he was, and still is, very affected by our loss - it's easy to forget how it impacts on them too sometimes).

Anyway. On a brighter note, my temp shot up this morning, so it seems yesterday was indeed O day. And, as always before, nips are senstive now. It's a real comfort to know 'm at least O'ing now even f we don't have any luck this month.

Ah, and blue I thouht the mini-heatwave isn't due until tomorrow and monday?

Ladies I feel like I've missed something......have had all my normal OV symptoms but so far no positive OV test - has anyone else had this following an MC. I feel like everything is gearing up but I know I'm coming to the end of my fertile cycle and still nothing in sight!!!!

Feeling a bit concerned as wanted to start trying again next month, now I'm worrying that OV hasn't happened.....am I worrying over nothing???

Manda totally agree with you - it is weird how we get wrapped up in stuff because it is all happening inside of us but the hubby's really do take it hard. I think they try to keep strong for us though and don't say much about it but then you suddenly get a little window into what their thinking and it makes you feel sad but close in your sadness (if that makes sense)!!!

Hope all of you are enjoying the fact it's saturday - think we will be having one of our special "bbq's for 2" tomorrow if the weather is any good!!!

Xxxx

Hello all! Well this is the second post I've written, the first was inexplicably lost by MN. It was so eloquent and profound, I'm sorry you won't get to read it

Blimey Manda, you're a fertile one! Can you pass some of that this way please? 3 kids plus dogs eh? I'm not surprised you don't have time to read! I haven't read anything other than "The Baby Whisperer solves all your problems" and Grazia mag since dd was born. I used to devour novels on my way to work and was always on top of the bestsellers list. Ho hum. The Time Traveller's Wife is worth a read though.

Insomnia, it's common not to ov for 1-2 cycles after a mc and very common in the first cycle apparently - see www.pregnancyloss.info. It's bloody frustrating, you just want your body to get back to normal so you can get back on the mission.

Blue hope everything clears up soon.

MissG where are you???

Anyone I've missed, a big hello!

Well, DH is back so we'll dtd tonight, bit late now but you never know... I've pretty much dried up so don't think it'll do any good.

I'm here Marathon! The same thing happened to me the other day, I wrote an epic story and it disappeared . Will keep my fx that it's not too late and wish you a fun night!

Was in Edinburgh all day yesterday at meetings. When I got to back to Queen Street Station in Glasgow, my DH picked me up ....... and surprised me by whisking me away to Lodge on Loch Lomond for the night!! My DD packed me a bag as she was in on it too. DH is therefore very much in the good books, and it was the perfect opportunity to get down to some serious SWI (not so much fun having to go help my FIL clear out his house today with a red wine hangover though). There will be no for me tonight!

Blue so sorry to hear about more bleeding. Glad you had your nephew over. I am with you on the Christmas thing. I had gotten way ahead of myself and thought so much about what it was going to be like with a newborn and my 20month old (as he will be by then) nephew. . Christmas 2012 will have to do

Whatsoever did you get your BFN? Hope so.

Eve it took 4 weeks + 4 days for me to get a BFN. Much longer than I expected tbh. Now, I am 41 days after ERPC and still no sign of AF! Frustrating! Will need to keep testing every fews days, will cost a small fortune!

Sorry if I've missed anyone. Welcome to Shimmery.

My friend went into labour yesterday, I'm waiting to hear from her OH, could be anytime! And its DDs 15th birthday tomorrow, so got to get organised for her BBQ tomorrow (may have to do a sun dance though, still not looking too promsising here, but I am optimistic)

Oh, and Manda, you're so right. My DH doing that last night reminded me how amazing he actually is. And, I had been annoyed at him as he hadn't told his dad and Stepmum about her miscarriage. We told them today, and on the way home, DH said that our hasdn't wanted to give them such sad news over the phine, which is fair enough I suppose.

I am envious of your Ov signs. Still no sign of anything happening here.

Thanks for the info marathon - currently realising that life is not likely to get back to normal before hubby leaves......it's gutting to know that the MC means I will probably have to wait until Christmas before I can try again......that is a very horrible feeling but I have to be realistic and know that it is unlikely to happen before he goes away.

It's so hard because the doctor said wait a month and go again - at no point did she say anything about possibly not ovulating......I'm feeling down again now!!!! Was stood in the co-op behind a couple who were hugging and kissing and I just knew she was pregnant, you couldn't see anything but I remember when we found out we were just like that.....when she leaned over to pick up a copy of "pregnancy and you" I wanted to go up to her and ask how she did it!!!!

A couple of the girls from work had MC's and were pregnant the next month.....one even had an ectopic and was pregnant by the next cycle.

Alright time for a I suppose I might as well enjoy something over the next few months!!!!