Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 12)

[KnitterNotTwitter]

A safe place for everyone on the TTC after MC rollercoaster. Welcome and come in - virtual wine and chocolate for all, and lots of support and hand-holding until you get your BFP!

The thread moves fast but don't let that put you off - feel free to come along and stay to chat; or dip in and out with any questions.

If you want to join the stats, just add yourself to the list:

WTTC = waiting to TTC
UCL = usual cycle length

Good luck to all - here's hoping for lots of healthy, sticky BFPs by the end of the thread

For reference here's a link back to the previous thread

Latest stats to follow in a moment!

emoo yes i'm on my first "proper" cycle. i had started to think things had gone back to before ds i'd have a few days bleed 1 day off and another few days bleed. which is what my af was like this month, back then i was a regular 28 day gal. but now with this and i keep thinking implantation but i don't actually believe it is. i'll just have to see what happens.

mamap enjoy kent.

Dachs I'm sorry they weren't more supportive , at least it's known to them now and they've booked a scan for you.

Dachs pleased you rang, but sorry there weren't nicer to you - hope they are better on Monday.

Welcome, Collie, I think a lot of us joined MN after MC or EP, so you're not alone. I only joined last week becauase I'm finally ready to TTC again (I think....) and know I will benefit from somewhere to stress out the support.

Knitter that's really interesting about getting you to complain to the hospital. Has it made you feel better about what happened? (sorry, better is obviously the wrong word here) I often think I should have complained about my treatment for my EP last Jan, but at the time didn't feel I could cope with doing it. I changed hospitals instead, but still have nightmares about the treatment I received (or lack of it!).

Morning ladies,

Can I just say LAdyBee - how on earth do you do it? Not only the detail you give to each individual but in the comment to me you even managed to cross reference a post written by Pink, God knows when, about a notepad???!!!! But yes, I bet you are right, isn't it funny when we do that. I regularly remember people's names in my dreams that I would have no clue remembering in RL, then forget them again when I wake up!

MummyA - you actually made me LOL this morning when you were caught by Collie doing a little streaker dance!

Will be thinking of you today Mousebacon.

Knitter - sorry about your last few months. I know what you mean about maybe not giving yourself enough time at the time and it coming to nip you in the backside a few months later. As you can prob tell from quite a few of my previous posts I have been having some ok days and then some very low days recently (and this started a few weeks before I even started the Clomid). Sounds like your ordeal with the ectopic has been appalling though and I am pleased that writing the letter is helping give you a bit of closure on the situation. An apology can't change events but I am sure it must help towards healing the emotions from that event. (((hugs))) for you.

Collie - as I have been told before, no questions are stupid. Ask away

Can I just ask? I have been nosying at a few of your charts and I just don't get them at all. Emoo - so you suspect you may start AF soon, but why? I thought if your temps stayed up then it could poss mean you are pg? I have no idea so would love some clarification for typicals please ladies.

Apologies in advance for the mememe post here:

Having read lots on here and elsewhere about clomid, I'm getting a bit concerned that they're not planning to monitor me at all - especially since I have ovarian cysts (though not PCOS) and had a large one removed when I had surgery for the EP last year. So, from what I've read I should be phoning and asking if I can have regular scans. But - stupid question alert - who do I ring? My GP, the consultant, his secretary??? And what do I say? Chloe - am I right in thinking you're not being monitored either - did you ask anything about, or did you not know about it (like me)?

Also, different question entirely, I've been monitoring temp for the first time and its always around 36.1 - is this really low?

lilly i can't answer your first question as i have no experience with that, but for your second, i just changed mine to see what it was in celsius as i use farenheit as that's what my thermometer is. and it changed to 36.00 (96.8) which apparently used to be the average according to google when i looked the other day.

sorry chloe i don't understand the charts very much either, unless they're obvious with big crosses on etc. [bgrin] i'm learning as i do mine.

Does the temp drop on the day af starts or before???

Morning all. Just marking my place on the new thread.

Welcome to Collie, sorry you find yourself here but these ladies are wonderful!

Chloe - my thoughts are all over the place at the moment! You're correct about the chart - yes, as long as the temps stay high, and AF hasn't started, there is a possibility I'm pregnant . I feel like I'm sitting on a fence at the moment and am about to fall off one side or the other - I'm getting intermittent period-like pains, which is why I think AF is coming and haven't POAS yet. On the other hand, my chart is still very beautiful, and my LP is one day longer than usual. I just wish I hadn't had 3 nights of disturbed sleep . Someone else, can't remember who, was saying that their temp was higher when they woke up early. aaaaarrghhh sorry for the mentalling!

Lily - I would ring whoever started the Clomid. And 36.1 is fine, and steady is good, means you're more likely to get a helpful chart. To an extent, it depends where you're sticking the thermometer!

Cep - temp can drop suddenly on day of AF, day before, or gradually fall in latter half of LP.

Knitter - thanks for starting the thread, and sorry you've been having a rubbish time of it. Did the 6-page letter of apology help you, do you think? Did they sound genuinely apologetic and tell you how they were going to change things for the better? Or was it full of excuses?

MummyA - thanks for the champagne! I promise I got ceremoniously smashed used it appropriately to celebrate the new thread!

Mouse - thinking of you for your ERPC today, and hope you have gathered enough support around you to help you through the next few weeks.

Wombat - thinking of you for your scan today.

Hello to everyone else who's around today.

Morning all, thanks for wecloming me.

Hadrian so sorry for your loss too. How are you feeling? Has your cycle retured to normal yet?

I just don't know whats going on with mine. I beld for 2 weeks after my m/c then had over a week of EWCM, then nothing for about 5 days, now more EWCM. Still no AF, although my UCL is 40 days. No idea where i am in the cycle though its all very frustrating.

My BBT thermom arrived today though so once i've figured that out it might help??

Emoo, whats WTF? Hope you don't mind me asking? xx

lily re my complaint. It's not too late to send a letter in. St Georges, Tooting was my hospital and they were actually really grateful for the complaint if that makes sense. It gave them the chance to review and rewrite the entire care pathway for pregnant women who enter hospital through A&E. One of the elements of my complaint was that I was treated with no extra care/consideration than someone with a broken leg. But losing a baby is more than just a bad injury.... :(

The hospital has apologised fully for the errors and the pain caused by the result of the errors and having that does give me a degree of closure that I wasn't expecting.

One thing that surprised me was friends attitude to the complaint - they felt that as I was alive and it had been free I really shouldn't grumble. BUT that wasn't how the hospital saw it at all and they have told me that as a result of my complaint it is likely that many womens lives will be saved. For example they are going to get funding/equipement that allows them to do gynae ultrasound outside the hours of 9-5!

It isn't too late to write and I'd really encourage you to do so. If you want to see my letter as a template feel free to PM me and I'll happily send it to you.

Thanks for the hugs everyone else - yes it has been a rubbish few weeks but I am feeling much more positive this week.

One of the other things that the councellor has suggested is taking Evening Primrose Oil and that does seem to even out the high's and lows of my hormonal cycles which should mean I don't crash so low next month....

emoo glad to know it's obvious when it happens then. [bgrin] i'm just being impatient, i know that and i know it must be bugging people me going over similar things all the time. Once this first cycle's over and i can chart a full cycle i'll be much better honest.

Lily - yep I am also in thr group of no care throughout the Clomid. However, if you want to push for this then I think you should contact your consultant/secretary as when I rang about side effects the gp advised me to contact the consultant.

WTF means 'what the fuck' collie

Forgot to say collie, if you have a look above the messages there is an acronyms list which will help you when using mumsnet (mn) as lots of people abbreviate lots of things! you get used to it.

wombat you will be fine lovely, best of luck xxxxx

Thanks Chloe, i have been reading that but i didn't think that made sense.

I don't know who you ladies keep up with this thread! I'm supposed to be working from home, but can't help keep taking a peek as its all really helpful!

collie it is a very fast moving thread. you tend to get a bit addicted if you're not careful. I seem to be on here most of the time at the mo. It can be difficult keeping up and unfortunately you can miss peoples posts. just use it as is best for you. The ladies on here are amazingly informative, and so very helpful and lovely.

Twitter good for you for putting in a complaint - clearly it needed to be done and things will never change unless people do what you've done. Rotten that you had such lousy treatment though :(

Collie welcome :) Dip in and out as you want to; ask any questions you like, no matter how daft you may think they are. Oh, and we do a good line in ranting and venting too :)

Wombat thinking of you today, good luck xx

Mouse hope all goes well for you today too xx

Shiny new thread! May it bring a positive tidal wave of bfps :)

Hello lovely ladies!

Mouse I am so, so sorry to hear your sad news. I am so sorry that you have to go through this all again. ((hugs))

Hello to collie

wombat good luck for today.

lily my average temp before ovulation is between 36.0 and 36.2 ish. Post-ov is between 36.4 and 36.8. It's all a bit of a muddle until you get a pattern over time, really.

cep I promise you, it does get easier to see newborns, be happy for friends, get involved in baby talk. Even before you get the BFP you're looking for. It really does take time. I was distraught when my lovely sil got pg 1st cycle after suffering a miscarriage at the same time as me, but it is lovely seeing her now. I'm only ever slightly envious, even as my age gap between dc creeps towards 5 years.

I'm a bit confuddled by the list, mummya. I should be on cd3, what should you be on, does it all look right to you?

&knitter glad you were able to raise some concerns withg the hospital, and i'm very glad you got a decent response with them. If it can help to ease the pain somewhat, then it can only be a good thing.

emoo Nice looking chart!

I'm gonna start my SMEP on day 10, seeing as I ov silly late. I'm gonna be knackered! Yes, izz am gonna try with the ov sticks, only once in the pm, and also temp, and see how it goes, God, we're going to be knackered

dachs good news for scan, what concerns were you wanting to discuss?

Hows all the updiffed? sick as dogs and sore as hell, I hope?

Off to finish the housework, take ds to the park with his bike, no stabilisers, I'm a v proud mummy, and then back here to make tea. The joys of a day off, hey!

Just a quick post from work to let mouse and wombat know I'm thinking of them.

mouse - hope you're doing ok x

wombat I was kind of hoping to see an update but realised that unless you were actually planning on posting from the scan room, that's unlikely. Hope it's been a good one x

Hi - not a hope I can keep up with you all but just wanted to pop in and say mousebacon so sorry for your loss. Life is so unfair at times. I hope you have lots of RL support to help you through this difficult time.

Emoo like your chart! Fingers x'd for you.

All ok here, just watching the days slowly tick by and hoping for the best.

morning!

cep dont worry about asking the same questions, the knowledge must be passed on! (in a few weeks, you will be telling other women how to do it ) I think if you have got your first temp jump may have just ovulated. Its not unusual to get a bit of blood at the time because the drop in estrogen can cause a bit of lining to shed. I may be wrong, but if you get two more high temps in a row, FF will mark the red lines.

lily have you done the free fertility course on FF? Its a great way to learn about charting. If you havent signed up already, click on a link to someone elses chart, and sign up from there, that way you both get 5 free VIP days. 36, could be low- pre-ov temps but its different for everyone, you really need to do it for a month or two to find out what your pre-ov temp usually is. Hope you can get monitoring sorted.

collie we call the first cycle after mc/erpc WTF because nothing seems to be normal and anything can happen!

knitter your letter story is very inspiring. I have thought about doing something similar several times but always chickened out. Can I ask was your counsellor a specialist in mc's?

wombat thinking of you xxxx

YRMOTB my stats are OK now. no one else has said anything, so shall we just change yours?

somebody slap me with a large wet fish, I just tested at 9DPO (BFN)

On phone so will do proper catch up later but just to let you know Wombat Bean measures 7+3 with a hb of 160 bpm!!

Never felt so shocked and relieved! Xxx

HOORAY FOR WOMBAT BEAN !!!!!

Oh phew phew phew!!! Nice one wombat, enjoy that relief!!! xxx

mummya i can't slap you cause i'd have to slap myself, so did i today even though i think af is coming

i've been thinking about my cycle and looking at my chart here i think i actually ov'd on cd12 which would be about right on my previous shortest cycle of 24days. When i was temping pre last pg i was consistantly 96.8 which i started off with on my first temp before it went up to 97.odd which would mean that i'd be due on monday so the slight cramps and bleeding will be af related.

wombat you home yet hon?

xposted as always WELLDONE WOMBAT so pleased for you.