Ancient Egypt; where the regal BESH barge floats gently in De Nile.

[owlboots]

Glittering seductively in the evening sun, crewed by swarthy slaves, waited on hand and foot by bare-chested manservants bearing a rudimentary form of gin.

We have golden temples decorated with hieroglyphs for sacrificial offerings (and woo from the soothsayers) if required, and The Pit is full of asses? milk.

So, put on your eye make-up that goes out as far as your ears and jewellery so weighty it leaves dents in your head and step out to survey the peasants on the banks.

Come join the 30s TTC if your womble is as ancient and crumbly as Tutankhamen! Egypt; the thread where everyone eventually gets to be a mummy whether they like it or not.

Don't forget the implantation secs next tuesday then truffles with the added benefit of fooling convincing the other half you value him for something other than baby making.

absolutely Rocket in my haste to post I didn't mention we did the sechs for the last 2 days just for fun too! Shock horror. Also, OV was actually Wednesday not Tuesday so am clearly going a bit mad. Will be looking out for symptoms from mid next week!

Whoop Truff. Well done. And impressed on the SFF!

Still quietly menkulling, won't be testing tomorrow as, erm, might have accidentally used up a test today. I fell over and landed on it and a bit of wee came out. You know how it is.

But obv was too early (9dpo indeed). If only I hadn't tripped over my copy of TCOYF.

In other news MiniG has now hidden my thermometer. Aaaaagggghhhhh!

GaGa step away from the piss sticks! Definitely too early, I'm slapping you with the crocodile carcass. Maybe on Wednesday we can start eyeing up your kidneys.

Truffs impressed with the sechs marathon

I'm trying to persuade the FF charts that I'm going to lay an egg soon. Am considering wearing chicken costume in the hope it might influence my disobedient ovaries.....

Anyway off to dip some sticks to look for a surge and then demand the sechs from Mr Sol.

I did something really stupid last night. :( I googled a couple of ex's - the two most horrible ones who made me feel bad about my weight & looks. Without being too mean because god knows I've had(have) my struggles - they both now appear to be with women who resemble space-hoppers with heads on. And the Flemish arsehole who refused to go to Scotland with me was DANCING in a fucking KILT in fucking EDINBURGH! Tossers.

Oh I had that, Pony. The guy who made my 20's miz and refused to move to London with me (despite actually woking there himself) immediately shacked up with a girl who looks like a boy in frigging London when I finally found the cojones to dump him.

You're in sooo much of a better place now.

Obv he worked there. He didn't do anything in Woking to my knowledge.

mylittlealpinepony if they google you will they find you and TGB looking chuffed with the bear? A wise woman (possibly Jackie collins) once said that the best revenge is living well... My ex has very poor privacy settings on face book and is bald with a paunch having had wonder-abs back in the day! Most satisfying

I weed on a stick too, tripped over ladygoneclumsy and also fell on a mid stream test far too early but I did faint in tesco so got excited! Was perhaps hangover and not a baybee as was not a winner.

Bitey what dpo are you on? I'm only 9

10!

OK, wanna do a "not pee on anymore sticks til Wednesday pact"?

you're on! Wednesday it is!

C'mon trippers - get yer biros out!

bitey This is true of course - just annoying you know. Is it "wrong" to want to google and find a picture of a sombre funeral procession? Gaga - Yes, the one in Edinburgh said "I don't want to move house, I don't want a girlfriend and I don't want more kids". Within weeks of me walking out he'd moved house... in with a woman who had kids. Although I'm glad he's gone - the photos made me feel "funny" inside - always expected to see him on Crimewatch, not Edinburgh.

PS bitey Not sure who's husband/partner TGB is - but if you recommend him I'll do the sechs with him too!

Oh dear! Which one is yours?

haha I've got a jailbait (jb) who is 12 years younger than me. He doesn't know anything about the 70s - although I tried to show him yesterday when I stumbled across a minging house on interweb. He was very perplexed last Sat when a friend and I sat here singing "Dogtanion, Dogtanion ... one for all and all for one, Muskahounds are always ready"!

Impressive cradle snatching skills there pony TB (the boy) was born in 1978 but for some reason knows more about 70's tv and general media trivia than I do. I think he just has one of those spongelike brains for that sort of thing. Plus his BF is my age so that might have helped.

Ha ha Bitey my husband is TGB (the geek boy) and although it was clearly just a typo, I feel inordinately proud that he could be shared amongst the BESH.

I'm just 4 DPO and managing to quell the menkul for now by staying drunk for most of the weekend keeping occupied. Am most looking forward to Wednesdays' POAS / IAR extravaganza. Clearly if there are BFPs on the barge, it's only a matter of time before mine follows non?

I've had a lovely morning watching last nights' Strictly whilst TGB sleeps off his hangover. Am feeling a little peckish now so may need to rouse him for breakfast. (pliz to note: this is in no way related to my coming over all uneccessary after watching an unexpectedly raunchy rumba on strictly and needing to join my husband in bed. Oh no. No siree.

P.S saw Stewart Lee's 'vegetable stew' last night and was a little disappointed. Had to make up for only 7/10 funniness with several rum & gingers, which helped the laughter along!

Bring on some BESH barge BFP's!! MountPony I used to love that cartoon dog

I snogged Mr Sol at a party when I was 15 and we 'went out' for a summer. I randomly stumbled across him again when I was 30, sad and thinking I was destined to always end up with wankers.....

He's at bloody work again though so I think any chances of winning a baybee this month are slim to none

I am vey, vey impressed at Alps young, virile man-possession. Mine's 3 years older but from a whole other country so can't do much 'Do you remember [insert TV programme of choice]?' I met him in my 2nd year over here but he was so bloody shy it took me a while to make him talk to me (or it might have been the language barrier akshully )Anyway, he's mine now fo-evah :)

I have question - answrs pliz on a postcard.
If I had a mc do I need to wait till next droid or could I go straight to ovulating? I have been having an awful lot of pant snot and presuming it's shagtime but then saw some random people on a bus here talking about how they were waiting on the droid after mc.

It's a personal choice milano - There's no reason why you should wait for the next droid - you should ovulate as in a normal cycle. Some medics prefer you to wait - because it's easier for them to date the baybee if they know when your droid was as ov could be delayed due to mc. Depends whether you want a baybee or to make a mw's job a smidgeon easier - although tbh a 12 week dating scan pretty much does the job.

Just one last question milaono, why were you checking your pant-snot on the bus?

I tried straight away, Milano. If I counted first day of mc bleeding as day 1 I ovved a week later than I would normally expect (was temping and using OPK's). However, had a crappy 7 day luteal phase that month so think was not a viable month despite all teh sechs. Hormones prob needed a bit of time to rebalance themselves.

My GP OK'ed it anyway (although EPU told me to wait but I ignored them). If you use OPK's then you should get round the dating issue.

Depends if you feel ready, hon. I desperately wanted another baybee and didn't really see how waiting was going to make me feel any less sad about the one I lost sooo...

I love Dogtanion by the way. And Dungeons and Dragon's, Cities of Gold etc etc. In fact I have bought MiniG the box set of Dungeons and Dragons and he is watching as I type this.

Children of the sun! Doo doo da doo doo do aaaaah having a remenice too watching back to the future it must be the day for it! Apologies there truff and ski was spelling jail bait as gaol bait!
Thinking of booking a snow boarding holiday in February, could this bring an ironi-diff about?

Yes, Bitey, it prob will. Go for it.

I'm waiting and booking a last minute one if not diffed by Christmas. Skied when pg with MiniG but feeling lot less gung-ho about it since having the mc. If diffed will channel the cash into a nice beach holiday instead (Skeggy Thailand, Maldives, - missing a season could have its compensations!)

bitey It's worth a shot - my ski hol is booked & paid for - last 2 weeks of jan. Should I get diffed this cycle I'll be right in the middle of ms misery! I don't have a problem skiing whilst diffed though - I'm a member of a hardcore ski club & friends have skiied up 'til and including their EDD - in fact one went in to labour whilst skiing - but that's another story.