Ancient Egypt; where the regal BESH barge floats gently in De Nile.

[owlboots]

Glittering seductively in the evening sun, crewed by swarthy slaves, waited on hand and foot by bare-chested manservants bearing a rudimentary form of gin.

We have golden temples decorated with hieroglyphs for sacrificial offerings (and woo from the soothsayers) if required, and The Pit is full of asses? milk.

So, put on your eye make-up that goes out as far as your ears and jewellery so weighty it leaves dents in your head and step out to survey the peasants on the banks.

Come join the 30s TTC if your womble is as ancient and crumbly as Tutankhamen! Egypt; the thread where everyone eventually gets to be a mummy whether they like it or not.

Chompme what did you do for 3 hours before your usual getting up time - did you go back to bed?!!

I have just come back from the needle lady. I luff her - she is like a walking breathing encyclopaedia of baybee making stuff.

I get lots of freebies but I would swap them for a better job (with a reasonable boss)

Milano

Bitey did you test using shit internet cheapies? Try a FR willya? For me?

sunshine I did go back to bed, fully dressed with wet hair but couldn't sleep as FDH was breathing really loudly the inconsiderate git!

pisamater all I have in my handbag are two biros, 40 green fags and the ice scraper. Please to help yourself to this booty except the fags

Bitey pliz to tell me what green fags are?

Sorry to bother you Barge-dwellers. I need help with a spot of menkulling. Have developed panic that it's all a mistake and I'm not actually diffed.

Pliz to be whacked with business end of asp until I gets a grip. [pull yourself together emoticon]

Foxy what's brought on the menkull?

SunnyD i learned today that 3 other people at work had recent BFPs (thats approx 10% of our full-time staff including Moi). Thought how brilliant it is, then thought I hope they all work out ok. Then thought about odds of all 4 pregnancies sticking. Then started to menkul.

It's a simple train of thought really - as well as being fucking stupid. Am really not normally a panicky person, so assume it is hormone-related menkul.

Anyway I don't think that crocodile is going to be big enough...

I work in an office. On my floor there are about 70 people. Most of them of women. In the past year 6 people have been diffed. All 6 of them went on to have healthy baybees. Quit your menkul.

Fanks missus! That is what is so great about the Beshettes - all my menkuls are instantly sorted, and with only a small amount of bruising around the kidney area. Can we put the croc back in De Nile now? It is starting to look really pissed off, and that can't end well.

Menkul over - croc back in De Nile.

Well done SunnyD

Now, 50 lashes for me. I just cried at a blardy John Lewis Christmas ad.

gin Your baybee will be fine. We have three women in our department - TWO of us had emcs at 36 weeks! D finished work on the Friday & laid Monday morning, I finished work on Friday and hospitalised Tuesday (laid Thursday). We is speedy.

milano House is cheap as chips - obviously there's a spanner in the works in that one has just come on the market today at nearly 30k cheaper but with a shit bathroom. For 30k we can have gold taps! 'Tis ridiculously cheap at under 300 a month mortgage.

Howdy BESHies (oops sorry, a bit behind the freds!)

Am with you on the need to HTFU after I found myself inexplicably tearing up at the article on the Wills & Kate engagement in tonights' Standard! Also, I had my hair 'Brazilian blow dried' tonight and got an entirely disproportionate rage at not being allowed to wash (or even wet) my hair until Sunday! No actual, as in physical symptoms though at 7 DPO so I must just be a loon.

GiniestFox am glad to see your menkul has been slapped out of you. Just for good measure I'm going to add a few nipple tweaks and rabbit punch.

MountainHoss nice house move conundrum to have! I'm practically salivating at the thought of a £30k bathroom. Good work on all teh sechs as well

Sunshine glad you're enjoying the neegles. I've been having reflexology for several months and although it hasn't yet won me my baybee I feel very zen for at least 24 hours afterwards. My foot lady has suggested a shiatsu (smirk) specialist for helping to obtain diffment. I'm considering an intro session to see what I think. Who am I kidding? She told me they've jointly had several winners who came to them with fertility ishoos so I'm basically going to hand over my bank detail.

Oh don't truffs - I bought a house about 6 years ago and got a designer in recommended by a friend. I gave her a budget of 6k but could've gone to 9. Anyway, the silly twat came back with a quote for 24k! Which to put this in to perspective, was a little 2-bed cottage in the arse end of Belgium - NOT a townhouse in Belgravia. I would not dream of spending that type of money on a bathroom unless there was chilled Bollinger coming out of the bidet to wash my arse with! So, really don't know what to do right now. Prefer house A but B is so much cheaper. Bugger. They're only about 150m apart so there's no "location" argument - we don't intend to spend all our lives here so it's not as if we're saying "we'll retire here". Maybe just go for the more expensive one as it'll only make 100 euros a month difference on the mortgage anyway. Gah.

Well I nearly passed out in my class at the gym last night, felt dizzy & tired all day. So, seasonal sniffles, over-tired or OMG MENKUL? (bearing in mind am only 1DPO)

drunkfox Statistics were invented to fuck with our heads. I find blatant ignorance of any such thing very effective.

cross-posted alps
Let the menkul begin .

truff I am very jealous about your Brazilian blow-dry. I have fine, shit, straight as a poker hair and would LOVE that blow-dry - but the hairdressers here look at me as though I'm speaking Greek if I suggest it. :( Please to show photos? milano I am wondering if they think I want a pube perm!

Bollinger coming out of the bidet to wash my arse with

Pony I have a full on lady crush on you

laurie haha I am re-thinking the whole "chilled" bit though - not sure anyone needs freezing cold bubbles on the foof!

I am also fascinated by the brazilian blow dry truffle In which direction does the landing strip point?

ladygoneandputideasinmyhead If no sign of droid by the end of the working day will be a fR on the way home

skihorse 1 DPO is plenty of time to start menkulling. I start right after the SWIing and sometimes even during!

Lunch time fumble update: still no droid

PS sunshine green fags are minty marlboros and a rare delicacy in an area with very few shops so I stock up in tesco

Where is everyone?

Do I have to come over there and poke a piss-stick up your wee wee?

Getting a FR on the way home snowpony that will bring the rusty one fo'sho'.

Pah! You're clearly not a dog in my household - they can barely raise themselves from the sofa when I get home - unless of course I'm home via the butcher's!

Oooh exciting POAS action. Wee bitey, wee bitey - it's your birfday, it's your birfday.