Avast Behind! Full of salty seamen and buxom lasses, the Gin Palais is heading off in search of Pirate Booty! For those brave BESHly wenches in their 30’s, TTC since the Black Death.

[BarbiesBeaver]

Ahoy Gin Hags, behold the Hendrick?s Palais, the finest sea goin? vessel that ever left these God forsaken shores. Packed with comely wenches and salty seamen, I be lookin? for a BESHly crew to travel the seas in search of booty. Land lubbers lackin? a twisted disposition need not apply.

Let me shiver yer minges with tales of the fearsome Droid Monster, who raises his bloody head each month, and the dreaded 2WOOFL, where the vaguest signs can be espied from the top o? the Crow?s Nest.

Get ye to the Brig, yer scurvy dogs, where Roger the Cabin Boy will see to yer needs, or apply the Cat O? Nine tails to yer britches if ye should mutter the oaths of Babydust.

Drink up me hearties, yo ho(es).

Anyway... am off to the gym now for a class. Jailbait is babysitting and cooking dinner before starting his night shift. :) This goes some small way to sitting on his arse all day on the Xbox.

(to make up for)

Areola is the rudity, Rie. Not areole, which is a bit of cactus.

Full pay!

Swings and roundabouts lyra. I'm back at work on 1st November - all ML at full pay. Whilst in the UK you have the "right" to take a year, I feel it benefits only the very "comfortably off" or those who never work anyway - because the rest of us need to pay the bills. Obviously if your husband earns a shit load you can afford to take a year off taking SMP and if you're on benefits you're laughing anyway.

Back in the real world I need a full time wage! Damn me for trying to make a go of life and not sit on my arse and damn me for not marrying a rich bloke!

Dunno. My work only pay the basic. i.e 85% for 6 weeks (which I didn't get as had just changed jobs), then SMP (which only goes up til 9 months). Luckily I was still entitled to my company car allowance which helped a lot (as had payed car off anyway). And MiniG's Dad was a Lecturer so we weren't exactly filthy rich. But I managed with savings and belt tightenings because I wanted the time with him at home. But I work full time again now sadly. And many people do manage on less so I don't think a years mat leave is only for the rich.

I know people who've managed a full year and definitely aren't massively well off. They've given up a lot of stuff to be able to do it and I know it's been hard for them.

Mmm, try being self employed, will only get statutory from the off set. But luckily have been saving like a mad thing and don't have a massive mortgage or I think we'd be fooked. No idea how long I'll be able to have off, just going to play it by ear but I am hoping to be able to pick up part time SE rather than FT permanent when the time comes (think I will worry about that in 15 months time)

RieRie am gutted for you, thats a MASSIVE head fuck droid being late, so sorry was really hopeful for you. Shit dog wanky droid. (wheres my message? :() You too occie tis shite.

OMG lozzer I am so glad your bro is ok, how very scary!!! and your menkulling sounds like it is extremely well founded. Everything crossed for you. How oss would it be if the FC triumvirate all diff this month? Thats a point... Wheres mountie? I'd say I am 50/50 shitting ti and pleased.

Barbie your snack choices are erm, interesting :D

Ha, remember me telling you I was going to tell my BBF prior to tomorrow night in case she squealed a lot? Well I got a text of her today asking me to call, which I did and she opened the conversation "I am afraid you are going to think I am a bad friend!!" Turns out she has been stalking lurking on here (did I mention she got me on to MN in the first place?) and saw the news before I managed to get in touch with her. Oh and yes she did a fair bit of squeaking down the phone at me. Now everyone wave to princesslurker please :O

Looks like I will be carrying out an experiment this month. How many symptoms can I spot despite not having had and SWI

Tomorrow morning may be ok, although I suspect egg will've shriveled by then. I wish the bloody thing dropped out, in the manner of a chicken egg, at least then you'd know...

Bitch slaps all round, except Lozza who gets a special fondle.

What's wrong with right now saltypoos?

I am so weepy this evening. I have just been crying in the bathroom. I'm supposed to be going out this evening. I'm not generally a crier I must say. We have just been arguing about his mother who causes an argument every time the subject of her comes up. She demands our presence every few months in some location or other, and starts making a fuss about Christmas about now every year. MrA and I always have to stay in the caravan because we don't have children. If we go on holiday with them we get the crappest room because we don't have children. We haven't had a holiday on our own for seven years and we wanted one this autumn but she has decided we must make another pilgrimage to the shrine of her grandchildren and worship them all together en famille that very weekend.

I can't cope :(. I just want some time off everything.

They may not be "rich" your friends, but perhaps better off than I. If we were to survive on jailbait's wage alone we'd be homeless pdq! Anyway, as we previously said, everyone is different and I am bored senseless and can't wait to get back to work. I ride my horse, I go to the gym, I do the housework, I cook from recipes, I bake cakes, I walk the dogs, I shop, I meet friends but fuck me is it boring.

Aries You are busy.

They do live oop North Ski, so have the benefit of lower living costs. But it was mostly doing nothing but paying the bills for a year.

That's the thing isn't it? It's not actually about how much you earn, but whether you earn enough to cover your outgoings. You could be on crappy wage but if your mortgage is low then you're ok. Or you could earn tons, but have a massive mortgage and old debts and be screwed.

I have worries that being on maternity leave might be boring. We shall wait and see.

Aw 12point Sounds like you're having a hard time of it at the moment and do indeed need some time off. Might a night out take your mind off things a bit? Come here and I'll stroke your hair and massage your feet for a while.

Aries my love. Didn't want to smush you into another post as you deserve full attention. Bah to evil MIL, can you not go on hols and Christmas and risk being the evil ones? I guess it would probably cause more hassle, but how blissful not to have to deal with it?

Can you take some time off from things? Cancel tonight, unplug the phone, pretend the world does not exist.

Oh rie tis just not fair. come and have a snuggle. Sack of going out tonight if you don't feel up to it.

Men seem to be terrified of upsetting their mothers though apparently. Even if the said mothers are mental and behave unreasonably because they have always been allowed to because everyone has always been too cowardly and spineless kind to tell them to pack it in and behave like an adult.

I agree with Muser. Sometimes you have to make a bit of a stand to break the mould. What does Mr Rie think? Here, have a go on Cap'n Jack. I think he could maybe do one more today.

TB has been known to call his mother "bollock" (in jest but still) so I think it depends on the mother. Is very hard because some boys get VERY defensive when it come to their mothers and she does sounds like a very controlling specimen. He has to understand that YOU are the important woman in his life, not her. Is horrid you have argued about it tho, not what you need right now, petal.

Thanks for your kind words. I have made my feelings ever so clear over the years, but whenever the subject comes up, then a pained expression haunts his face, the head goes into the hands and I am told that HE is the one to deal with her if we don't do what she wants. I even yelled at her once "For fuck's sake!" when she was being particularly ridiculous, but it doesn't make any difference. Last year she demanded we go to France at the height of the summer season to celebrate her birthday altogether en masse. We told her in advance we couldn't go, but she went ahead and booked us anyway. This makes us sound very feeble, and I can't describe really why she is so difficult to deal with. Emotional blackmail I guess. The other thing is, they have recently lent us a lot of money and we are indebted to them :(.

Do you know, sometimes I forget that other people can come in here

Oh Aries, that's no fun at all. MILs can be strange creatures. It is considered a victory round here when BIL actually realises his mother is being unreasonable. Fortunately TH is a bit better at standing up to her, but she still specialises in guilt trips to make you do what she wants. I'm just a mean DIL who stands up to her - someone has to, none of her family will. So although your dynamics are probably different I can understand the aaaaaargh of it all. The money thing really can't help either :(

Can you tell MrA he really has to man up and tell her you're not coming because you've had a really busy summer and you need some time just the two of you, and you'll see them some other time? Sell it as she'd get more time with the grandkids if she doesn't have to spend time with you too? I'm sure you'd thought of that already.

On a complete tangent, for avoidance of all doubt, droid is definitely here. So I shall just wait hopefully for news from Lorry.

Well, I won't get SMP or whatever the benefits equiv is because I worked about 2 hours a week too little to qualify for SMP but about 2 too many to qualify for crappy benefits, so we'll be on zero plus TYF's wage, which is NOT a lot, trust me. Now I'm Dole Scum trying to find a job, which is proving more difficult than I imagined and won't have worked long enough for a new employer for them to not be able to boot me out for a spurious reason (but really being pg) or being required to pay me SMP properly, so I am screwed either way. We can't rely on cash from the ILs, as mine are pensioners and not very well off and his are rich but massive tightwads (not that I expect to be given handouts for a second, just pointing out facts before anyone asks if the wider family can help out).

Is a good job we hate socialising, don't drink or smoke, are massive skinflints and rent a nice but small flat in quite a crappy area that makes it much cheaper than it would be elsewhere. Things are going to be ridiculously tight, but neither of us are hey big spenders anyway, so we will just have to manage. I only got £200 a wk with my last job and managed perfectly well, despite having £200 a month debts to repay (evil Ex rang up loads of debts in my name and I've never been able to prove it, even though I've tried my hardest, so I have to shell out. Despite fact Ex is on over 45K a yr ). I'm still managing to pay them ok myself despite being on virtually nuffink now!

Not everyone takes a long time off because they want to 'sit on their arse' and spend their partner's cash (I don't take a penny off TYF). Some people don't have a choice, some people do it as a choice despite money being punishingly tight, because they think the pros outweigh the cons. Some people want to go back to work early and start earning good cash again as soon as poss. Some go back to work cos they have to and wish they didn't. Some people can't wait to go back to work, some find that being a SAHM is the most important thing to them. Every single case is different and no choice is wrong or better for mother/baby. Including those who do chose to let their husband paying for everything (who will be willing, so it's not like they're sponging if both are happy). We're just lucky to have all these choices.

PS re: MILs. I think we all know of Ye Tales of My MIL. And the fact that he wouldn't confront her if he found her raping, then sacrificing, disabled babies to Satan. I feel your pain, Rie She sounds a bit unhinged, tbh.

I've just spotted that Julia Roberts is starring in the film of Eat Pray Love. I don't know why but that just makes me want to hurt people. (wheres Jack?)

PS Hello Princesslurker! Top news about PocketRocket, eh?