Avast Behind! Full of salty seamen and buxom lasses, the Gin Palais is heading off in search of Pirate Booty! For those brave BESHly wenches in their 30’s, TTC since the Black Death.

[BarbiesBeaver]

Ahoy Gin Hags, behold the Hendrick?s Palais, the finest sea goin? vessel that ever left these God forsaken shores. Packed with comely wenches and salty seamen, I be lookin? for a BESHly crew to travel the seas in search of booty. Land lubbers lackin? a twisted disposition need not apply.

Let me shiver yer minges with tales of the fearsome Droid Monster, who raises his bloody head each month, and the dreaded 2WOOFL, where the vaguest signs can be espied from the top o? the Crow?s Nest.

Get ye to the Brig, yer scurvy dogs, where Roger the Cabin Boy will see to yer needs, or apply the Cat O? Nine tails to yer britches if ye should mutter the oaths of Babydust.

Drink up me hearties, yo ho(es).

ocarina I think everyone handles things differently - but there is no denying that Bear is a happy & quiet baby - although he has his moments! He can happily scream for an hour in the evening. But I didn't get in to this whole shebang blind - I knew it was going to be hard, I knew that I was going to have to forsake trips out/cinema/drinks etc., etc. and so I've not yearned for that. I knew I wasn't going to get much sleep and so tbh have not had many surprises thrown at me. when he cries and screams I cuddle and comfort him knowing that "this too shall pass". The only "difficult" bit I suppose is that so far I've been a bit of a wimp weather-wise - I've opted to stay at home or take the car if the weather is pants. I think it's possibly harder to adapt if you're used to a crazily hectic social life with lots of spontaneous happenings. Planning must be your mantra!

ARies, he has a couple of bibs which read "50% mum, 50% dad, 100% thistle". No Scottish stuff yet but he does have a babygrow covered in welsh dragons from my mum (the Welsh dragon).

I didn't "get" the whole baby smell - I think (from what jb says) it only lasts a few weeks - so I assume it must be foofoo/uterus! I use burts bees stuff on him so he smells of heaven anyway.

This might sound bonkers too - but I've always had animals, and so I've been used to feeding, watering and cleaning them first before my own needs.

Well I wasn't used to putting her needs before my own this morning when the fucking cat started pawing and mewing in my ear at ten to bloody four. I then shut her in the kitchen where unwisely I had left some leftover chicken tikka and rice on the worktop, and she jumped up and ate some, puked it up, walked through the orange puke and traipsed it all over the floor. I was awake by then and in droidal meltdown. Not an ideal start for the birthday boy when he woke at a nice, reasonable hour.

Rie i was addicted to MiniG's smell, and then one day it was gone. Think breastfed babies keep the lush smell for longer and then it starts to go away when you wean them onto food and they eat a significant amount. That's when the poo starts smelling yucky too.

Ski I think it very much depends on the personality of the baby and you still might be in for a hell of a shock next time round. MiniG was lovely but would not be put down. At all. We HAD to do attachment parenting because he made us do it! So he lived in a sling/my bed/my arms for first 4 months, then he started commando crawling at 4 months so slightly got a break by letting him roam the carpet. Plus I was going through a nasty break up while miniG was still small. But you are right that it's good to have realistic expectations. But would never change things for the world.

Aries So you say you were covered in vomit & shit before 6am and he was asleep oblivious to it all? Welcome to motherhood!

I used to marvel at friends babies who would sit happily in a bouncy chair watching wortld go by. Ski do you still do horses? I used to look after one three days a week and I could NOT combine with a baby too so if you do, hats off.

Rie I sympathise. Fucking cat puked all over hallway floor this morning. Only narrowly avoided miniG trampling it round the house.

Cass wise words! I feel similar to you re the 9-18 months bit. Like Ski says, I think it all depends on what sort of baby you have. They're all so very different and some ARE much harder work than others, there's no denying it. People used to say to me that going to work was easier than looking after children, and for a short time I might have agreed. Now though I would actually give my right arm to be at home full time as I enjoy Mini O's company so much. In fact, my positive spin on TTFC taking longer than I'd hoped is that I get to spend more one to one time with Mini O than I would have been able to if I'd now had the babe in arms that would have been the case if the 'plan' had worked.

(I'm not trying to suggest that you don't go for it soon Ski, I am just finding the silver lining in my own little cloud!)

Does Ski do horses? Is the Pope Catholic? Or is the Chief Rabbi Jewish? Or is the Archbishop of Canterbury an Anglican? Or is Richard Dawkins an atheist? Have I covered all bases ?

Lady - sounds like Mini GG and Mini O were similar. We also had the not being put down thing. I think BF babies also take longer to sleep through the night as they get so used to the cuddles. I stopped BF at 17 months and not long after we started getting much better sleep (although it may also have been that he was just ready by that point to sleep through too!)

Rie not sure why we have cats. I nearly trod on a humongous rat that had been deposited outside the back door on Wed morning. At 6:50 in the morning that was not the start to the day I had wanted. After narrowly avoiding squishing it more than was already the case I had to go and get the dustpan, shove it up against the wall to pick it up and run up to the bin with it's head hanging over one side and it's tail dangling over the other. BLEEUUGHHHHH

Yeah, they do sound similar Orchid, he still doesn't really sleep through. I am still breastfeeding though twice a day but in theory have night weaned (he's allowed once it's light outside). Looking back I think MiniG might have had reflux when tiny (HV said not) as he was sick a lot and hated lying down. He point blank refused the moses basket from day 1! I also used to piss myself laughing when reading evil GF - routine? WTF?

Anyway. Babies, schmabies. It's Red Friday, so we should be drinking gin and squabbling over Cap'n Jack.

Do I do horses? I smell of horses AS I TYPE! Was supposed to be riding to the pub today and back - about a 4-5 hour trip - we got a mile and turned back due to torrential rain. I have my own and was back riding 6 weeks after my c-section.

I haven't worried about routine too much this end - well, bath is at 8:30 and I like him to go to sleep after. But I just decided that I would live by his routine whilst he was so tiny.

Sorry about the droid Rie. I was absolutely sure it was your month :(. Still got everything crossed for Lozza, of course.

I think if I ever got a BFP I would be 75% bricking myself, which leaves only 25% for excited. That doesn't sound good, does it?

Why me not got no message :(?

Lyra reckon your percentages are better than mine . I haven't even POAFS yet (though they have been purchased & are in the boot of my car, gulp) & I'm already 98% scared, 1% shock, 0.5% Ahfuckit & 0.5% neeeeee excited.

Someone just did "aureole" on Countdown. Snort!

rie isn't that that garlic mayo jobby

Our evil cat barfed all over the sofa this morning and now I've washed the (frankly rather aging) covers the feckers have fallen apart. We can't afford a new sofa. And I'm shit at sewing.

There were swarms of cutesy babies in the swimming pool today, I considered nicking a ginger one.

I always thought the smell was johnson's baby wipes?

Naw, Lozza , it's that thing you get in the sky over Finland.

But what do you do with Bear whilst you are riding/mucking out, Ski ? Do you have family around to help out? I'm interested because I was always desperate for my own horsey but put that dream firmly on the backburner when MiniG came along.

But then I was single Mum for much of his babyhood and de facto single Mum during the week now as MrG away.

Good luck, Lorry. What flavour sticks did you go for? Plz god not the evil Digitals?

Owlie but no because that smell doesn't persist when they are toddlers that shit themselves. It's a special nekkid baby smell.

What are you doing watching Countdown Rie ? You should be doing something with Brie/Walnuts/Seaweed* right now...

*not all at once. Blurgh.

I can't be arsed. We're going down the Italian.

Did I spell aureole right? Is it the northern lights, garlic mayo, or the circle round the nip?

GaGa I'm on livery so I don't have to do the work myself. If I want to ride then my boyfriend babysits - either at home or at the stables. He finishes work most days by 10am so we've the day free. I'm happy to leave the baby in the pram when I ride in the school but jailbait's not having it - I hope he chills out about that. No family for 400 miles.

Full livery?! On mat leave wages?! Do you do a byline in selling your body/criminal activity we should know about? V lucky though, esp with the 10am jailbait finish - would have been v. hard to give up a horse I imagine. I'm rather

Rie I think an aureole is sadly not a rude thing at all

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aureola

I'm on full pay and my livery is but 195 shiny euros a month.