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Conception

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Planning ahead!

178 replies

decafgirl · 04/09/2005 09:53

Is it just me who's planning ahead before she's even ttc? I've decided to come off the pill at the end of December and have started to drink decaf (v. difficult!), eat more fruit and veg, cut down on the vino etc. Am I mad to plan this far ahead?

OP posts:
mumswish · 12/10/2005 09:42

Mine has gone mental since I came off but because it was sooo low when I was on the pill DP wont do it with me as much cos I always said no. So now hes making me wait.

LOL

kleggie · 12/10/2005 10:00

Tell me about it Muppet!

Whilst taking the pill (9yrs, same as you) I only ever really fancied it during the seven day break when for obvious reasons we couldn't. Poor old DH thought I just didn't fancy him.

Now I'm not taking it I feel 18 again. In a good way. Without any of the attitude, teen angst, acne, poor music taste, questionable fashion sense, conviction that life is soooo hard on me etc etc

Kleg

PS I wasn't really like that at 18

spod · 12/10/2005 15:29

Message deleted

Harrizeb · 12/10/2005 15:56

Ladies can I join you here please?

I have been TTCing but we have had to put our plans on hold until Feb/March next year .

I feel a bit of a fraud being on a the full TTC thread.

Artoo · 12/10/2005 16:01

Hiya Harri, come on in

I'nm a bit of a fraud too, as I'm really trying at the moment. I did a lot of planning ahead though, so I'm hanging around for the moment

My info is:

Started July 2005
First
34.

Hugs,
Artoo.

mumswish · 12/10/2005 16:14

Ok,

this is my first, I'm trying from around end of dec/bed of jan (if I can hold out much longa) and I'm 21.

Anything else?

Harrizeb · 12/10/2005 16:18

Hello Artoo thanks for the welcome.
I've seen you on the Beanies, Bumps and bikini's thread I think.

My stats:

Me 34
Trying for no 2, have DS 2.5yrs
Trying from Feb 06

H x

mumswish · 12/10/2005 16:43

Girls - Completely different topic has any of you been on the pill and if so how long after you took your last pill did it take for you to start bleeding? I took my last pill 2 weeks ago (yesterday) and still nothing. Its 31 days since the first day of my last af and I'm confused.

pussycatmomma · 12/10/2005 17:38

Hi everyone, I just wondered if there is room for me in here? I have been a mumsnet fan ever since buying one of the books, and am often found browsing through the different threads. I dont really know where I fit though....heres the deal. Im 30, dh 33, married for 15 months, me totally desperado to start trying for our first bambino. Dh is trying to hold out for a while....My sister has been going through IVF and today got her results - BIG FAT POSITIVE! It was important for both of us to concentrate on my sis for a while, but now shes pregnant we are all estatic. But am not sure where this leaves me! dh official line is we will start ttc in jan , but we arent using any contraception, just being a bit "careful" at peak times. Am I anywhere near the right thread?? I read your posts and am scarily like decafgirl, I have pregnacare and folic acid in bulk in my bathroom drawers. Would be lovely to have the support of other mad girls like myself xxx

loubag · 12/10/2005 20:54

Hi everyone!Great to see lots of us in the same boat!
ttc as from this weekend!
first
me 31
dh30

muppet3 · 13/10/2005 08:55

Good to see I'm not the only one on here who's started TTC recently If it's ok I'd like to lurk around here a little longer ...

TTC since last month
This will be our first
I'm 27

Mumswish - I guess it depends what kind of pill you're on. I was on Cilest, and every month 'false' AF started 4 days after my last pill of the packet. Unless I was super stressed (like when we were moving house ... oh boy, did stress play havoc with me that month). Although since I stopped taking it altogether, I haven't had any bleeding for over a month now.

Glad I'm not the only one with the increased sex drive! Dh is complaining now that daily is too much oh it's great after all those years of him whinging the other way...

jersey · 13/10/2005 09:03

Hi welcome to all the new girls, in answer to the questions

when are you starting ttc? Nov 05
is it your first, second? Second
age? 34

When on the 7day break pill my periods continued on the same pattern they had been on before. Now on femulen and will let you now in 2 weeks, haven't stopped yet.

We can call this thread the planning ahead and just started thread I think!!!!

jersey · 13/10/2005 09:08

pussycatmomma yes your in the right place. COngrats to your sister, mine is still debating IVF as its her only chance.
muppet3 your welcome to lurk, I will be when we start next month .
hi harrizeb also seen you on the other thread, I'm between the 2 myself. Welcome.

Apologies if missed anyone.

Goodluck with the planning xxxxx

mumswish · 13/10/2005 09:10

I was on Microgynon and without fail during my 7day break I bled (prob false af as said before) but I havent even bled yet.

kleggie · 13/10/2005 10:23

Hi Harri, seen you over on the other threads, welcome.

Ditto pussycatmomma, think your assertion that we're all 'mad girls' is not only frighteningly accurate but probably a great suggestion for a new thread title. Seeing babies everywhere, staring intently at calendars counting and re-counting what day we're on, gazing one second too long at other people's bumps, sudden irrational interest in cm, ooh it goes on and on... quite mad I'm sure.

Anyway, so everybody know what page we're on again...

me: 24
dh: 23
first baby
ttc when: well er, that's a toughie. Not technically being that careful, but not trying as hard as we plan to in a couple of months.

I'm actually being a bit glum about it all day. Haven't told anybody in rl that we're ttc apart from my boss, who I told in confidence yesterday (work's all a bit up in the air, redundancies expected, voluntary retirements suggested and I wanted her to know in advance- my job's safe btw). She is 36 and has a 4yr old dd and on telling her she said, "work wise that's fine I'll get you all the maternity waffle, but on a personal level can I suggest you wait. I love dd but wish I'd waited much longer. Don't throw it all away now." Left her office a bit confused, stewed on it a bit, felt angry and then wondered if she isn't slightly more clued up than I am. I know each woman is different, but I get on very well with my boss, she isn't just projecting her own dissatisfaction onto me, I think it was just her honest advice.

I'm not changing my mind, but am disappointed that the first reaction I had was a negative one. I'm not telling anybody else till I'm 12wks pg and have started dreading the 'Ooh I'm so pleased for you' in case everybody is secretly thinking the same as my boss.

Anyway, shut up Kleg you're waffling again.

Morning all! Looks like the bright weather's packed up and gone on its hols. There's truly nothing worse than Norfolk covered in drizzle!

Kleg

mumswish · 13/10/2005 10:27

Kleggie,

Do what you want to do, if you want to wait a little longer then fine, but if you feel that now if the right time to have kids then have them. No one will be thinking about why hasnt she waited they'll be too happy about the news youre telling them.

HAPPYFACE · 13/10/2005 11:07

just saw this and thought i'd add, as soon as i was married 1st thing was have a baby, been with dh 8 yrs now and dd is 3.5 and ds 13mths.
even though i did all my homework etc nothing can prepare you for how hard having a child is, i was 26 when i had dd.
I will tell her to do everything she wants to do that you can't do whilst you have children before she has them and ideally i think about 30 is right.
having said all that everyone is different and children are wonderful and i also worry about being too old, dh wants one more!
we'll be 33 and 35 then but not fully decided another 12 mths yet to think about ttc!
good luck with whatever you decide, i'm sure it'll be the right thing for you.

jersey · 13/10/2005 11:08

Same here Kleggie, its your life if you want to TTC go for it.

All I get is when are you having the next one!?!?! Not telling them hopefully soon.

pussycatmomma · 13/10/2005 15:46

hi all.....thanks for nice welcome jersey and kleggie. Its nice to know we arent on our own, us mad girls:-) The overzealous-ness we feel is universal im sure. Just had a little wonder about something....Do you all think that your dh will ever want/yearn/need/ache for a baby as much as you do? Mine is very ok with children/wants a family but never has the same air of desperation about him as myself. My mum says this is just a man thing, and seeing it in my brother-in-law, im thinking along the same lines. But my dh sees my hopeless baby addiction and i think feels concerned that he doesnt feel as strongly, and maybe mistakes this for being "not ready". Any thoughts? by the way , I always seem to log on when no-one else around- sorry! hugs x

Normsnockers · 13/10/2005 16:09

Message withdrawn

muppet3 · 14/10/2005 08:45

Kleggie - that's a disheartening first response - big sympathy. But don't be put off by it - it definitely won't be a typical reaction. Only you know when the right time for you is, and it's as simple as that. I'm in a career where I'm supposedly a high-flier with exciting prospects ... and in my last appraisal I asked my boss to stop pushing me on as I was planning to TTC and wanted the 'right' role in terms of hours and stress as opposed to the 'successful' or high-paid one. It's not a choice I would have felt comfortable making a couple of years ago, but in the last year I have concluded that now is the right time for me. I was worried about dh not feeling as strongly as I did. Really anxious actually. Didn't want him to blame me down the line. But in the end it was him who sat me down and asked if I would have children with him . I feel much better about the joint hard work ahead after that.

pussycatmomma · 14/10/2005 13:12

Kleggie, |Im in agreement with Muppet....Only you and your beloved will know when the time is right. When dh and I first mentioned children, his familiys' reaction was horrendous - he has 4 sisters. They all with their partners years and years, and of course all able to wait years b4 babies. They all thought we were rushing things and we had plenty of the "just enjoy being married for a bit" comments. Now we make our own decisions and leave other people to their own opinions, after all , its our life. Stick to us girlies when you want some sound advice - we understand! x

muppet3 · 19/10/2005 19:02

This thread seems to have gone a bit quiet Managed to resist the temptation to test again at the weekend, and accept that my cycles just haven't got started again since coming off the pill (5 weeks ago and counting). Mind you, once it gets to 6 weeks or so I think I may chance another test just in case there's a better reason.

On a different topic, I've been offered the flu jab at work ... but given there's a chance I may be early-stages pregnant, is it ok to have it? The chance of getting a doctor's appointment to ask is zero ...

jersey · 20/10/2005 08:23

Hi everyone, AF arrived yesterday so offically TTC now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Muppet not sure about flu jab, I would guess not a good idea.

After all planning, couldn't find my digital thermometer to start temping!!!! So going to be a few days late starting when I can get to the shops to buy another.

Good luck everyone. How are you doing decafgirl haven't heard from you for a while?

decafgirl · 20/10/2005 13:26

Hi guys, sorry I've been away for a while - we moved house recently and haven't got the net at the new house yet! Hope you're all well.

I totally think my sex drive has vanished because of the pill muppet3, I adore my dh but 99.9% of the time I don't have any of those 'special' urges I'm supposed to! I'm really hoping that when I come off the pill next wednesday! it improves dramatically. I'm sure dh does too!

GOOD LUCK JERSEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

decafgirl xxxxxx

OP posts: