1001 Fallopian Nights: The BESH-Harem Opens for 30s TTCs & their silk pyjamas. Sherbert on tap. Baklava made by doe-eyed boys freely available. Kelims provided for SWI. Hookahs optional but welcome.

[Headbanger]

Scented silken tent opens its flaps* for business. Nubile veiled houris available for deep tissue sandalwood massage for that pre-droidal unease. Starlit pit tended by gleam-eyed sheiks proffering rum-soaked dates on golden platters. Goatskin rugs laid beneath hanging brass lamps for the un-PC BESH to frolic in furs. Intriguingly tarnished lantern housing benevolent Zita-Genie buried beneath piles of embroidered cushions. Don your curl-toed slippers & coin-fringed skirt, and I'll see you in the corner with a young Omar Sharif and ice cubes made from Tanqueray laced with desert honey and no you can't talk to him he's mine...

Chiropracty (is that a word?)? Hmmmmmm. I wonder what s/he would make of my back and neck. Maybe they'll cry out with horror and say "I'm sorry ma'am, there's nothing I can do for you. Get thee to a surgeon!"

Oh and Cass, glad you are feeling ok thus far. Must be a big relief x

Nah 12pt they'll have seen it all before (in the nicest possible way)

Are we making you feel better about the stealthsecks?

No, Sallie not selfish, I find it comforting too. Click on Polly's name, luvver. That's excellent news re. sickness CassterSugar. Where is Edie? Making me feel guilty writing all diligently unlike me.

glad to hear you aren;t feeling sick, Cass

Ah yes ^ prize thicket. Oh my goodness its a proper baybee!!!!!!!! Pretty lady bump there to pol but VERY scary doll in the back ground :o

er to too

btw re FF, think all the extra bits are due to getting the VIP upgrade for the first 30 days after you have joined.

GreenStuff it is indeed a hideous doll - it's a Dora explorer bath toy head for messing with the hair... my sis bought it for Moo for xmas and unfortunately she loves it.

Really glad to hear you are feeling good and getting lots of rest Cass.

I have just baked a lemon victoria sponge and some toblerone cookies. I'm not one to boast, but fuck me they are delish. It has only taken me 6 yrs to get to grips with cooking with fructose in our shit oven, but by jove, I think I have it cracked now.

Do you think RieRie is on the job right now?

And how exactly do you stay slim, PooPoo? And before you say you are not, I have seen the picture!

She feeds it to all of us lot instead Why the fructose pol is there an allergy in zee house or just for general health reasons.

I think rie is exactly where I should be :( cant be arsed tho, no wonder i haven't won a baybee...

Just finished bottling ketchup and am very also apparently i smell of garlic so a bit at forcing my advances on the boy.

btw you are not doing anything to disabuse my belief that you are super mum pol

I'm not :(. And it ain't gonna happen either. BAH.

Give me a toblereone cookie immediately. Although actually I wouldn't be able to eat one as I feel extraordinarily sick.

Mountie and GreensLeaves I generally eat a very strict diet of cardboard and vodka due to intolerances to all cows diary, sugar and yeast. Due to abusing my body in the past I get recurrent infections of thrush in my gut which gives me weird new intolerances and can make me really ill. Which means none of the following: cheese/milk/yog (except goats), no bread, pizza (wah!), cakes, fruit juice made with concentrate (too much sugar), dried fruit, mushrooms, vinegar, soy sauce, booze (except gin, vodka and champagne).

I can't even have sweeteners instead of sugar, as they have the same effect on the thrush. I can however have agave nectar and fructose. And since being diffed I am indulging my sweet tooth, although trying to use fructose instead of sugar, although I have failed with the toblerone cookies. Poor Scropey has similar ishooes to me but much worse. Tis a pain in the arse to be sure.

And why aren't you doing it, young lady?

Oooh, prey tell about the abuse.

I'm really not Salad, I'm more or less a SAHM (work 3 evenings a week) so have lots of time at home with MadamMoo. And I like cake. Hmmm.... I can't buy it, so I have to bake it meself.

Oh Rie is MrA not up for it? Go on, have a cookie, it will stop you feeling sick. Works for me anyway.

oh i see poo that sucks and i do wonder what is left for you to eat. (cardboard obviously) i love the agave nectar tho, is very tasty in coffee although cooking with it would be rather costly i imagine?

aries poor show old girl. perhaps you can hop on in the middle of the night without your dad (or even your fella) noticing? :o

i like baking too but its ALL gonna be about the pickling for the next few weeks. I only made viccie sponge once and it came out a bit wonky but tasted good and rose, so thats half the battle. I am better at fridge cake. no skill just throw some good ingredients at it. My chef friend is doing a pastry course in sept, cant bloody wait to be chief taster :D

Oh Polster you poor thing. Yet you make all these delish foodstuffs!

I don't know why I'm pukey. Certainly not diffed as I've had a droid since the last Secs. And it wasn't a light half hearted affair either. Prolly just exhausted. Can't have it ce soir because MrA has to go out and finish some work in the pitch dark. And by the time he comes back I will be comatose in bed. I wonder if we make a jizz pipeline from his place of work so we could have remote sex . Any thoughts on the mechanics?

just reverse my idea and he can hop on while you sleep :D

Bah. Any chance of the morning romp, Rie?

No yeast in VS Mountie. VS is generally a bit boring I agree but I put lemon essence in and it kind of sparks it up a bit. Got a lovely recipe if you like? Its more like a merangue mixture, no butter either.

Abuse of my body was generally of the smoking/drinking/drug-taking kind, plus the fact I never cooked, or ate veg or fruit. I lived on coke (of the fizzy kind), speed, green, wine, lager, cider, takeaway, marlboro lights. Breakfast would consist of can of coke, Double Decker bar and bag of hulahoops. Mid morning snack would be some kind of pastry or sandwich from the delivery van, lunch would be in t'pub, dinner (if I bothered with eating) would be takeaway or restaurant on way back from pub/club. I basically did that from 18-30 and was in a fine fucking state by the time I got into my 30s. I am definitely paying for it now... But it was fun at the time!

leave a postit stuck to your fod saying "have your wicked way with me, just don't wake me" ;)

Rie can you get him to JIAP and use turkey baster? He PROMISED to updiff you this month!