What would be the ^worst^ and most unsuitable Christmas present you could possibly receive?

[moondog]

For moi I think gift set of cheap oil 'infused' with some grass herbs along with some dried out spices and a crap mortar and pestle.

A Gimp Doll. That would be awful. Oh no wait a minute, FIL gave me one 2 years ago.

After the gimp doll anything is a welcome improvement.

Bath stuff, I hate baths its just floating in your own skin and dirt in slightly scneted water. Vile.

Any alcohol gift sets, the wine is always rank and I just don't drink them.

And any novelty DVD game, or drinking game set. No.

Tanee, no an average size one, which pretty much stopped working after a few weeks. Pepper grinder, that is

Anything my MIL buys me. Cheap frilly bags, cheap slippers, cheap frilly hair clips, bows and ribbons. I am really not a frilly type of person and hate cheap shit. However, the excitement of having a female personage to buy for after two DS's was clearly too much.

The worst one ever was the Christmas after DD was born - a pair of Snoopy pyjamas. Size large. I have no idea in the world why she thought I'd like it, but she doesn't actually think about whether the recipient would like the present or find it useful, but whether there is a red money-off sticker on it - she then selects a victim for the vile item.

I have asked DH to tell her not to get me anything but he refuses as watching me give an Oscar-worthy performance of how lovely it all is, is one of the highlights of his Christmas

This is the mn police .... slubber step away from the internet, I repeat move away from the keyboard until your alloted time....

Sextoys from the inlaws

Well that killed the thread

Ummm - just hope they hadn't tried them out first .

Sorry, I'm still thinking about Fattipuff's pepper grinder.

I once got a yellow bath bomb. It was like sitting in a bath filled with warm wee.

Mmm warm wee... This thread is getting positively kinky .

What on earth is a gimp doll?

Yees I was wondering that, but after the sextoys and warm wee, I became afeard to ask!

Thank you EachPeach. I was norty but feel suitably reprimanded.

Jux a gimp doll, is exactly what is says on the tin. A doll dressed in bondage gear with a zippable face mask on. What sort of look do you arrange your face into when your FIL gives you one? Sadly, I did not know the answer to this question 2 years ago.

Where on earth did he buy such a thing? and why?

Ah, this reminds me of when I was first married to 1st H, and his Nan gave us a toilet roll holder in the shape of the rear half of a Beetle car, made of earthenware. She obviously thought it would go well in our first flat. It never made it to the bathroom wall funnily enough.

EachPeach, I believe he got it from Brighton. I believe he got it in an attempt to make his new DIL shriek in suprise and alarm and fall backwards in her chair in the manner of a Monty Python MrsPepperpot.

herbietea, g-strings, ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

My god, I came on this thread for some light relief and instead I have been totally corrupted.

OK, now a gimp doll is on my Christmas list! along with wee coloured bath bombs, naff undies, a vibrator and Jonathan and Darlene Edwards Greatest Hits Volume 2.

My god, I came on this thread for some light relief and instead I have been totally corrupted.

OK, now a gimp doll is on my Christmas list! along with wee coloured bath bombs, naff undies, a vibrator and Jonathan and Darlene Edwards Greatest Hits Volume 2.

When I was about 10, I had been saving my last big present from my mum until last - I can't remember what it was I wanted, but I recall there was something definite I'd asked for. I opened the gift to find...an electric blanket.

I was a generally polite child, but I was so taken aback I couldn't do anything but sit there silently in dismay. I remember it especially, because there had recently been a Watchdog or some such consumer program about the dangers of electric blankets catching fire. It was never used. That was my worst present ever. If I were ever given another one, that would be the most unsuitable present ever. That and the odd metal dog-faced sex-mask from Coco de Mer that someone put on another thread.

slubber he must be demented
I am just stunned.

Crusha

MY BIL bought his wife a dishwasher once.

Also I believe one year she was the happy recipient of an iron.

My worst present would be slippers - hate 'em.

Or Playboy jewellery.

a dog