Do you follow the want, need, wear and read Christmas present rhyme?

[ricketybeauty]

Does anyone else try to stick to the "Something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read" rhyme/ theology (??) of presents? From Mum and Dad at least!

I've tried to the past couple of years - maybe gone for 2 x want presents and then a present from Santa and stocking as well. The year I was pregnant with my second, I went absolutely mad and got her tons of stuff and opening really felt like something we had to get through rather than enjoyable.

But, my point really is what do other people do for the "something they need element"?

I see what you mean, sorry! I don’t tend to bother with the novelty pants or so on myself but I will wrap up a nice item of clothing (like aforementioned Elsa coat.)

I grew up in a financially constrained household. We used to get socks/pants etc (sometimes nicer than normal) in our Christmas pile.

As teenagers toiletries started appearing too.

i actually didn’t dislike it and I don’t like some of the consumer aspects of Christmas. My whole philosophy tends to be a few more expensive things than lots of cheap stuff.

My son's presents will include all of those.. but like most, I'm not putting a random limmit in one.

What if he wants books that year? Sorry only 1... Or there are toys but they need 2 or so to play.. oops poem says no.

Why limmit it? You don't need a random rule to stop yourself from spoiling your kids, just don't spoil then.

As for needs... It depends, I like to do consumables and useful things like tooth brushes, pens, water bottles etc. But more fun then normal ones. So themed around a tv show or game he likes. Minecraft tooth brushes etc.

Or things that they need for specific interests or clubs or activities are good.

Furniture and room stuff also works well for bigger "needs"

No. I detest it as being irritatingly worthy, joyless and middle class, dictating that only certain gifts are right to give.

In my opinion - something to wear - most people choose their own clothes. If it's a child, it's your responsibility to clothe them without pretending it's a gift to them.

Something they need?? What, like toothpaste or socks? Again if they need it, it's not a gift, it's a necessity.

Something to read - because it doesn't matter if they don't like reading, books are a moral good apparently.

Gifts are meant to be about what you think that person wants. Not what you think they should be allowed to have.

Give LESS or don't give at all, but don't pad it out with non gift items (unless the person asked for it or you know they want it)

Well yes, I would have to say one book only because quite frankly the book shelves look like they are going to collapse being so full!

For me, it actually does help to have a loose structure to stop myself going mad with presents - different strokes for different folks etc. You're probably different.

Stuff for bedrooms is a good one though...

We never used the rhyme and we’ve never padded out the pile with pants / socks etc like a pp I’d rather give less than just wrap up anything . My adult daughter often gets PJs for Christmas but that’s because she asks for them .

Swim bag I get, we quite often buy DS’s hobby stuff for gifts at Christmas, cadet kit etc. But there is no world where Lego is a need, just don’t bother with a naff poem if it’s going to make you break your own rules!

My kids are adults now so were around long before a twee poem was written - but I always did modest stockings, padded out the tree presents with things they needed, new pj’s etc. and bought 2-3 things they wanted

When I was a child from parents we always got a main present plus a couple of things that would match with it. So for example if the main present was a Barbie Doll then the matching gifts would be some Barbie clothes or accessories.
We also got an annual (eg Bunty - I wish they still published them) and then a stocking - which was things like bubble bath, stickers, novelty key rings, choc coins, socks etc.
So not really the "four things" of the poem but essentially main gift, matching smaller gifts, annual (or book) and stocking.

(we also got gifts from aunties/grandparents but they tended to be random stuff that often we weren't that interested in)

Well that's the point isn't it! It's my own rules I can break them if I want 😂

I don't make the children quote the poem, like saying grace or recite it to myself when I am going around the shops.

What if you'd lost an important bit of lego from a kit? I reckon you could classify a replacement as a need??

My user name clearly shows you always Need More Lego 😂😂😂

(Lego is my hobby....)

No, if they need something then they should have it anyway. Not as a present.

Always did need but that’s because of my background

as a child we couldn’t afford much so bundling the need into the Christmas pile made it much more exciting and more things to open . and sometimes the “need” thing was a nicer version - a jumper little more expensive than the basic Asda one for example. Coloured rather than plain white knickers

and that habit has stuck - never bought much during the year and then a big pile at Christmas and birthdays

but I am a natural saver too because of that - I learnt to delay gratification as a child and that is also something I have passed down the family line which does wonders for savings. No impulse purchases saves quite a lot over the decades.

If you haven’t got a million spare pieces of Lego around your house that could be a replacement I’d say you’re not a die hard enough Lego fan to be able to call it a need 🤣

Fair

Yes we do. The "need" is usually something for his hobbies (gym and footie), which is always happily received. The "wear" now hes a teen is a new shirt /hoody whatever, (when he was little might have been new PJs. In fact the rule works really well for teens!

It’s a great rule of thumb for teens or adult children who have expensive needs and wants eg branded clothes, make up or perfume, and need expensive tech for school, expensive kit for hobbies etc. I think it is a bit joyless for younger children.

Books and clothes are essentials, not gifts, for little kids. We always had a book or annual in the stocking to keep the DC entertained first thing though.

I think it’s better to stick to a budget and a number of gifts at that age and only buy things that they will be excited about. If they want Pokémon PJs, that’s fine but I think a swim bag might be a step too 😂 But you know your child.

That sounds so bloody miserable and the thought of it is the complete opposite to mine and my families Christmas. Ours is a time of joy, excitement and magic and we all have a pile of fabulous presents to open You can shove something I want,something I need etc 🤢

No because I’m not a 🐑

Oh god yeah, I do like to make sure we don't have any joy. I don't even let them put the one lump of coal I've given them as their "need" on the fire.

🙄

Not a jot! I’ve never really thought about it but have realised that my immediate reaction is that something my child needs shouldn’t be a present. It’s my responsibility to make sure they have what they need outside of present-giving. Not that I wouldn’t chuck in a brightly striped flannel to a stocking. But main present is want and frivolity.

OK.

Father Christmas does this for us, along with their stockings.

Mummy and Daddy buy the big ticket items.

Agree.

We usually buy our DC the things they need; they both have sensory issues with clothes so they are functional only - they hate wearing most things so would never covet a new jumper for example, and we use the library every week (reserving the books they want to read) so that discounts three of the presents 🤣 Though to be fair, I do usually buy them a "special" book each year, but still, one book and one other item would be pretty miserable.

No because it's a bit joyless and I'm all about the joy at Christmas.