Do you follow the want, need, wear and read Christmas present rhyme?

[ricketybeauty]

Does anyone else try to stick to the "Something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read" rhyme/ theology (??) of presents? From Mum and Dad at least!

I've tried to the past couple of years - maybe gone for 2 x want presents and then a present from Santa and stocking as well. The year I was pregnant with my second, I went absolutely mad and got her tons of stuff and opening really felt like something we had to get through rather than enjoyable.

But, my point really is what do other people do for the "something they need element"?

Yes plus stocking fillers. I follow something similar for birthdays too. Especially when they get soooo much stuff from other people!

No I dont, I dont understand it. Children should have books, clothes and anything else they 'need' whenever they need it. Not for Christmas. Or at least if they are getting those things for Christmas they shouldn't be in replace of wants, they should be extras on top.

We have been doing this for the past 3 or 4 years and my parents now do it for my kids too. We tend to buy two of each plus something from Santa and a present from each other plus stocking, although I’ve told my son if the things he wants get very experience he’ll only get one or one expensive thing and one smaller thing. We also get a new family board game that I usually give to them on Christmas Eve.

We also add ‘something to do’, so that might be play doh or some kind of craft set or the kids science sets like build your own robot arm, sometime we get them tickets for a kids theatre show, last year I got Bluey’s big play tickets for the weekend before they went back to school.

Need wise we’ve bought them oodies, onesies, new headphones, a new hat/scarf/glove set, a travel box for Lego (comes with a pull out drawer and a Lego board on top), foam pogo type jumping toy that could be used indoors (ADHDer who needs to expend energy in the morning, thinking I might get him a small exercise indoor trampoline this year!!!), last year I crocheted them both a blanket and they got nice electric toothbrushes. Some people might say those aren’t presents, you should just buy them and yes we were buying them anyway but it’s something else to unwrap and they loved it! They were actually very excited to open their Frozen and Lion King oral B toothbrushes 😂

My kids really like it and I like it as it focused my buying.

I’m definitely going to add in “something to do” I’ve got two very into crafts at the moment so that’s perfect for something I know will get used on a rainy day when they are fed up!

Oooh, ouch!

Maybe more inclined to do that for birthday, DD (7) will be getting a new dance class bag and gymnastics clothes, slippers/pajamas, gymnastics bar/mat, football boots and tickets to a show. Mainly hobby related with a day out.

Christmas is much more magical and our time to restock the playroom for the year so we get things to do as a family and will last such as board games and craft supplies, smaller treats like beauty bits, lego, a soft toy for the youngest. Then usually one main present that is along the lines of a bike, scooter, dolls house, train set or tablet.

They know Mum & Dad work to earn the money for gifts and they choose them. They then ask Santa and his elves to build the toys and deliver them.

I think of it as a guideline amd then go a bit mad anyway. I'm determined this Xmas to go a little less mad with 'extras'. It gets overwhelming for all.

My work friend says she always did 'big, medium and small' which is probably closer to what I try to do for the main presents.

'Need' for me means something related to hobbies that they would like but didn't think of themselves. That would have been a big part of my gifts as a kid as I had an all consuming hobby.

My parents were very minimalist and a bit stingy. Christmas was still magical, but I definitely go a bit overboard these days to compensate!!!

Yes, i used to pad out presents with need stuff by getting things like PJs, slippers, stationery with a favourite character on, or for teenage years maybe a football team logo. I think I stopped around mid teens when I could see that DS wasn’t over enamoured with these extra gifts and would probably have been just as happy without them. Although I do still do it to a certain extent eg shower gel.

No, because my kids get the things they need when they need them, they don’t have to wait for birthdays and christmas. Plus if they started opening pants and socks on Xmas day they’d think I’d gone mad, they aren’t fun at all.

Some kids are happy to have these things, especially as extra stocking gifts. I wouldn't do them as part of a total of just 4 gifts though.

Everyone seems to do things very differently, it's interesting how the stockings come into it all as these seem to vary a lot, which makes it hard to know what the total amount of gifts might actually be like for each child.

its the range of size of the stocking that’s blown my mind! Ours are just the standard small size you’d get off Etsy so whatever we get is fairly limited in terms of size!

@ricketybeauty I think that's a lovely little poem and don't find it 'totally miserable' as some of the more consumerist posters on this thread do!

What is maybe more miserable is getting to the middle of January and realising you have a big pile of 'stuff' that might not get used or played with.

I love Christmas generally as well, to me it's not all about the presents. I think it depends on the ages of the kids as well. We have always done one person opening a present each - even from very much young kids - and then everyone appreciating what they've receive... so it's not a big pile on.

Ours are grown up now, but on the 'needs' part - socks always feature heavily and are used and appreciated. Another clothing item that goes down well is a nice chunky hoodie in a make they like. Pyjamas or nightie type thing.

And no, never did Christmas Eve boxes with PJs in etc - although that sounds fun. It's horses for courses really.

NB we also had the same (smaller size) stockings for each child each year. Grown ups don't have stockings in our house - maybe they should, cause then I'd get one?

As adults or older teens “needs” are different especially if you’re receiving it as a gift rather than paying for it yourself. I love getting gifts I need but my focus on my dcs is wants when it comes to Christmas & birthdays. Yes they may get extras like a new dressing gown, fluffy socks or branded clothing we wouldn’t normally buy but I feel if a child needs something parents should be automatically providing this not passing it off as a gift. Although I teach them to appreciate everything and they do. They get stuff from an elderly relative that goes straight in the charity shop pile, but they smile and thank her telling her they love their gifts because they know she means well.

We have unopened or unused stuff for months especially when dcs were younger. I wouldn’t think it’s a waste of money just because its not played with by mid January, we don’t splurge through the year what they get for birthdays & Christmas is it unless they buy it themselves, so I’m happy as long as it eventually comes out, which they do because I know my children and what they like.

My older 2 are very much into the whole beauty skincare trends for tweens/teens, I’d go mad if they opened everything they got last year all at once, thankfully they know there is no way I’m buying the latest trend throughout the year but they know come Christmas they will have new products they can enjoy for months. Dd2 said to me last week she can’t wait for Christmas as she’s almost out of the Sol de Janiro shower wash she got last Christmas. Once it’s out she’s on the bog standard soap or shower wash I pick up from honebargains.

We stick to this completely and then do stockings as well, stockings in my house are little bits and bobs, nothing fancy. The kids get so much from family under the tree too and it would be overwhelming otherwise. Plus buying loads of crap to fit into my small house is not my idea of fun and I have serious eco-anxiety.

Yes. Daughter got a bag for her ice skates as a present.

I do buy gifts from all of those categories for my DC and DH.
They always get new pyjamas for Christmas which is the need and also wear!
As DC got older they may get clothes that they really want too, and probably need but maybe not that specific brand. I always buy DH some clothing for xmas cos hes rubbish at biluying it himself. My DS has now moved out and asks for household stuff!
But they also always get fun stuff and I made sure they always got the toy they really wanted.
I always got them a book for Christmas for years, and still do for one DD but mostly they read on kindles now and DS sadly doesn't read at all. I always ask for a book for myself.
I guess I loosely follow the rhyme, for DC and DH and for my own gift wish list too. Not limited to 4 gifts thou, especially for DC.

We kind of follow it though in the stocking and we’ve expanded the amount of categories so they are rather overstuffed. It’s a guideline to focus when shopping and so the stockings contain similar but individualised and the same number of things. Categories can overlap for sure. And we do have socks in the stockings 😁 Also sometimes an overflow sack/pile as I’m not good at sticking to my own rules.
For something to read it’ll be a nicer book than the ones we get throughout the year perhaps hardback or for littlies a gift set book that comes boxed with a toy. Something to wear isn’t always clothing, can be jewellery, a watch, cosmetics for older, scent, dress up things, headphones. We don’t have a need category but that could be anything I suppose, perhaps they may need another toy if they only have the 1 they wanted most or a computer upgrade for college.

We don't do that but we've always done one main present plus a stocking and books. I'll caveat this and say I have 3 dcs same gender and v close in age so lots of toys were shared and we have a big family with generous grandparents, aunts and uncles. So they were never short of stuff!

The main present was always quite big and something they really wanted. Often a big Lego set, one year a shared playstation, that kind of thing.

Stocking gifts were carefully chosen to be fun and one or two would be a bit bigger than your average stocking filler. No PJs/socks/toothbrushes etc.
I only included toiletries once they hit the teen years when branded stuff felt more desirable to them. There was always some chocolate and sweets, a Christmas decoration for the tree, something fun and sociable to play with on Christmas Day.

So no huge piles here but thoughtful gifts chosen with care. They're young adults now but still love their stockings 🤣

I don’t use the poem but I do follow my own structure.

We do:

• A sack from Santa containing a gift from their list, a pair of PJs and a book, plus a stocking with a couple of small toys, sweets, accessories and toiletries
• something from their list from us
• a surprise - something they’ll love but haven’t thought of
• a board game
• a craft/art gift
• something educational (e.g this year one is getting the science kit from the bargain thread)
• a few books
• a gift bag containing a new outfit for the day, a few other items of clothing e.g branded hoodie for older DD, fancy dress for younger. It also always contains new underwear and socks

I don’t stick to this absolutely religiously - if there was something else I saw or that they really wanted I would get it, but it stops me going mad and helps create a good range of gifts. My two do get a lot of gifts from family too.

For me the clothes and underwear aren’t to ‘pad it out’. It was tradition in my family when I was growing up. One year I didn’t get new underwear and it felt really wrong having to go and get old ones to get dressed - I was about 12 and I was actually a bit disappointed! My two both love opening the clothes bag and seeing what they’ve got. However, if they weren’t interested then I wouldn’t continue.

My two would also appreciate a new swimming bag. Maybe not a dull functional one, but a sparkly one or a character they like - absolutely!

One thought - one reason we don't stick to anything like this rhyme is that DD has a really tiny family. She basically gets gifts from Santa/us and her grandparents who normally stick to one gift of around £20 or so.

It may be different if you have a large family and I can imagine that some families find it useful to control the onslaught.

We popped into Hobbycraft today as I needed some new needles to sew badges to DS cub uniform and they were both pointing out the sets they would like for Xmas.

I also find they really think about if they want something if they are told ‘choose two things you want’, they don’t tend to rattle off every advert they’ve seen on Milkshake! When DD only wanted smaller things I got a few bits and bundled it as she wanted a new doll and some clothes for it; the clothes were about £10 so her second ‘want’ present was two outfits, a sleeping bag and a carrier for her doll all wrapped together as DS’s was a £60 Lego set.

DS has it sussed now and opens his wear first (as that’s the most boring 😂) and his ‘wants’ last as they are the best ones. Clothes wise I tend to buy a couple of outfits and make sure it’s character stuff they like.

They also get stuff from my parents, stuff from IL’s and our best friends (and I buy for their kids) so they have plenty of presents.

No I think it’s quite sad. I have her birthday in December too so I buy around 20 presents ish and split them between the two days and then dad does a bit of his own shopping and then she’ll get a handful off her grandparents. This is a range of clothes, toys, crafts. I never woke up to just 4 or 5 presents as a child and I don’t want to do that for my child either. The excitement is presents when they are young and then they learn it’s about spending time with the family and having that as they grow too.

No, it's a bit joyless. Mine get what they NEED during the year. I won't pawn off one of their presents with a necessity.

Last year my daughter absolutely loved the little gifts that were wrapped to bulk it out were at the age where a pair of pants if they are frozen is brilliant in her world.