Poncetastic Christmas 2024

[StiffyByngsDogBartholomew]

@vivajen hasn't posted on MN for a year so I've taken the bull by the horns. I can't wait any longer !
Wherever you are, Fellatio, here's to you. I hope you're brining a turkey and had crafting authentic organic woven tinsel somewhere.
"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.
So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.
Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.
Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

🎄🎄🎄🎄

@TheWoollybacksWife I am, thank you, I'll look after I've showered.

"Question, how much liquid do you use for each?
Also do you feed the top and the bottom?"

Just the top. I pierce it with a skewer in several places and then use a calpol syringe to feed it. Probably 8 per feed

I’ve never made mincemeat before - can anyone recommend a recipe?

@MrsForgetalot I use a good quality jar and add loads of orange lemon juice and zest, brandy, nuts, glace cherries everything we like. No sultanas him indoors doesn't like them. I do it about now and let it marinate until I make mince pies when I use a recipe that has blobs of marscapone mixed with icing sugar on top of the mincemeat. I'm a believer in winging it. Then I use any leftover mincemeat in the gin or the ice cream.

blobs of marscapone mixed with icing sugar on top of the mincemeat

oh my! Can you share the recipe?

I'm new here, please can I join?

I normally host christmas day for between 6 to 11 people but this year I'm having a year off (and plan on sitting at home in my PJs eating and playing with DD's new toys) so have lots of free time for christmas craft poncing!

Last year I made an advent calendar for DD (wooden, decoupaged and painted!) which I need to fill. This year I'm thinking of making my own tree decorations, looking into needle felting...how difficult is it?

I think you can't go wrong with Delia (uses suet, meat or veggie) or Mary Berry (uses butter). I'm sure there are loads of others.

Delia says soak ingredients overnight and then heat in low oven for 3 hours.

Mary says bung it all in saucepan and simmer for 10 minutes so not really more trouble than pimping a jar.

Both recipes make quite a lot, especially Delia, so reduce according to what you need but this year's will be fine next year.

https://www.maryberry.co.uk/recipes/christmas/special-mincemeat

Oh my goodness the poncing thread ! Have been working stupid stupid amount of shifts so haven’t been able to join in , but now I can!

Christmas fruit went in to soak last week , along with the sloe gin being done . Seven cakes to make this year , so cleared the boot room and got my Christmas cupboard tidied up so I’m good to go ! Love reading everyone’s preparations

@Isthiscorrect can i ask how you use the grape vine to make the wreath base? Presumably it won't last till christmas though? I've also got a grape vine that needs cutting back.

@Magnoliasunrise I just cut long lengths when I'm training the vines. Strip the leaves and then because they're a bit unruly for an amateur like me I use a plant pot or something the size I want the wreath to be and then just wind it around and round winding it over and over and tucking the ends inside to keep it all together. It just dries out then so you can use it for autumn or Christmas, anything you like. I did learn by trial and error so apologies if it doesn't work perfectly for you.
I don't wait for it to dry out. So I just start adding stuff as I go along. Of course the actual grapevine wreath base isn't very thick in diameter but adding cypress trimmings, eucalyptus etc all makes for a good base.

Absolute genius!!! Thanks so much. I know what ill be doing next weekend then.

@PanettoneSoprano needle felting is actually really easy! And quick results - you can finish a figure in a couple of evenings. I was bought a kit to make a robin a few years ago and loved it. It's a really relaxing thing to do, just build up the felt slowly and keep stabbing the heck out of it!

My pouncing goes more towards crafting and OTT decorating, DH fully embraces the cooking and baking!

Currently decluttering and deep cleaning the house here. I bought a few more glass and brass candle sticks at the car boot. I found a wreath base in a charity shop and have been eyeing up the local hedges on my walks! I also bought 3 huge metal stars from vinted and DH spray painted them gold. Going to hang them on the wall in the sitting room

Seven! You champ!

@HannahDefoesTrenchcoat thank you

Before I use the same recipe I always use, any recommendations for a 6" Christmas cake recipe?

I'm just baking biscotti & stollen bites from Advent. Kitchen smells lovely but the recipes seem exceptionally wet 🤔 so I may use Nigel's stollen one again this year & look for another biscotti recipe too. One that's not going to run away off my tray!

@Magnoliasunrise, did you post your cake recipe at all? I missed it if you did!

I don't know which recipe you normally use @lucysmam but Delia has a helpful guide to scaling Christmas cake recipe up or down (at least that's what my brain is telling me...hope I'm remembering correctly!) so if you don't already use hers that could be a good option. Your biscotti loaf looks great!

Classic Christmas cake recipe | Good Food (bbcgoodfood.com)

Here you go @NoWordForFluffy I used Pedro Ximenez sherry in lieu of brandy and also swapped about 200g fruit for roughly chopped whole nuts - brazils, pecans walnuts think i used this time. I also soaked the fruit for about 4 weeks and just kept topping it up with sherry.

Pedro Ximenez sherry is used by Nigella in a lot of her xmas recipes and you can get it in Sainsbos.

It is a bit drooly!

I'm a wannabe ponce. I've got loads of ponceworthy stuff but I often work right up to Christmas, including Christmas Eve, and I run out of energy. This year I am determined to start my poncery in good time, so I can at least get a wee bit in before it's all over.

All these cakes look fantastic. I’d better get a shift on, I’d like to eat it in December. Dark chocolate and Guinness good housekeeping cake again, veganised.

DH has agreed to hosting on Christmas Day, so no longer any good reason to rein in the poncing

Sorry should have also said I dont add the 150ml brandy to the mixture in the first step coz i've already soaked the fruit and then i think it would be too wet

It must be cake season as there were 3 of us in Lidl just now, staring in bafflement at the empty shelf where the raisins should have been! I’m normally better organised

This seems early for cake making, no? Stir up Sunday is late October/November isn't it?