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Christmas

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Original poster

Gentle thread for those of us who would just like Xmas over with

149 replies

Durango · 22/12/2022 22:27

It feels like you’re not allowed to say it.

But i don’t feel excited by Xmas, I don’t feel the magic, I don’t feel cosy or sparkly.

I feel like I’d like it to be summer. I’d like the sun to set past 9pm. I want the kids to play out. I want the whole bloody false joviality over and done with.

Anyone else?

OP posts:
ChristmasCwtch · 22/12/2022 22:56

Of course you can say it. We’re all different. I embody Christmas all year round, so I get bored with summer 😂

What would make Christmas better for you? Do your kids enjoy it? Is there something nice you’d like to eat/wear/watch/listen to that would make the festivities more enjoyable?

Becsim · 22/12/2022 23:17

I can’t wait to get back to normal. I like the routine of normal life. Maybe I’m
boring 😅Christmas makes me feel anxious.

endofthelinefinally · 22/12/2022 23:25

Yes. Anyone who has lost a child or someone they love will be finding this time of year extra hard. It is impossible to get away from all the hype and enforced jollity. It is just a case of getting through it as best we can.

Poke · 22/12/2022 23:27

Yes, I’m not a fan. Much prefer summer.

I go through the motions, but don’t get any enjoyment out of it.

Twobigsapphires · 22/12/2022 23:32

I’m not a fan either op and just want it over with. I’m tired and need a break, not a house full of people all the time. Nothing over the festive period us for me. I love my family and friends I really do, but cramming every into a week or two is exhausting.
can’t wait until my kids are older and I can go away for Xmas.

IndeedDanielJackson · 22/12/2022 23:34

@Becsim I'm the same, Xmas makes me anxious. There's so much pressure and 2 of my dc have Xmas birthdays! Honestly my favourite part of Xmas is the quiet of boxing day when it's all over and I can relax and just curl up with a book or my cross stitch and a dvd.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 22/12/2022 23:36

@ChristmasCwtch there is nothing that would make me feel good about Christmas. I really don't like any of it. I can't wait for a January...

Sugarfree23 · 22/12/2022 23:42

Op I get it. Totally get it.

There are moments I'm looking forward too, my youngest and his surprises, but so much of it is an exhausting faff!

Poke · 22/12/2022 23:45

Same. I fantasise about a sunny holiday every year.
But with 3 children and a large extended family it never happens. One day!

AbsolutelyDrambulous · 22/12/2022 23:49

I can't wait for it to be over. I'm a single parent to a 4 year old and her behaviour is appallingly bad at the moment and every day is just a constant battle. Even though it's just us 2 on Xmas day, it won't be relaxing in the slightest..That's even if she'll let me have a full night's sleep. Currently surviving on broken sleep every night. I can't wait for the sodding day to be over and be done with it all. Feeling resentful about it all.

DoubleShotEspresso · 22/12/2022 23:54

I literally cannot see through to the other side yet.
Of course you can say it OP- it's not a great time for many....

spiderlight · 22/12/2022 23:57

I was feeling really Christmassy in late November and was determined to have a lovely one this year. DH killed it stone dead with moaning about how it was too early every time he saw so much as a fairy light, and I've spent the past three weeks ill with a hideous cough, haven't been able to do anything I'd hoped to, and I can't go on the planned post-christmas trip to DH's family because his dad has COPD and can't risk catching it, so I'll be home alone from the 27th-29th (which will be nice in a way but I was so looking forward to seeing everyone). My best friend is coming to stay for NY but she and her partner split up last night and she's not in a good way, so that will be a very different few days to what we'd planned, and I am just so exhausted from coughing. I have to make it fun for DS though.

AnnieSnap · 23/12/2022 00:05

@Twobigsapphires sadly DH and I found that going away doesn’t work very well either. If you stay in a hotel etc, it’s manically Christmassy, if like us one year, you try renting a villa in a lovely warm place in a Christian country, nowhere is open to book a meal for that day, so you find yourself trying to cobble something together on an unfamiliar cooker. So I f you’re going to do that, go to Asia, the Middle East etc!

DH and I don’t really like it. It’s nice to visit family on Christmas Day (where we don’t have to organise anything), but we hate the enforced, manic joviality for weeks before and a full two weeks when it arrives. I look forward to March when I can plant seeds and see the promise of Spring everywhere.

hesaidshesaidtheysaid · 23/12/2022 00:29

Same here, hate it, it's all so false.
We spend the rest of the year recycling and trying not to be wasteful then Xmas comes along and it all goes out the window! Completely bonkers, excessive and greedy.
Roll on spring and more daylight.
And don't get me started on the guilt adverts on the tele! Humbug all the way from me

Original poster
Durango · 23/12/2022 00:39

ChristmasCwtch · 22/12/2022 22:56

Of course you can say it. We’re all different. I embody Christmas all year round, so I get bored with summer 😂

What would make Christmas better for you? Do your kids enjoy it? Is there something nice you’d like to eat/wear/watch/listen to that would make the festivities more enjoyable?

We have lots of lovely Xmas food but :

  • I had to buy it
  • i had to think what to buy
  • i had to plan the menu
  • i had to work out the dates this would run out and that would run out
  • i have to think what comes out of the freezer and when

I love watching Xmas movies - but they’re all watched now!

By virtue of the fact everyone wants to relax and enjoy themselves - there has to be someone who absolutely isn’t relaxed or enjoying themselves to pull all the strings.

The mental gymnastics of presents, food, people, secret Santa, Xmas nights out, who’s sitting bloody where at the table is EXHAUSTING

Thank you for your post though - I can genuinely feel your Xmas spirit coming through! I wish I did enjoy it

OP posts:
Fourfurryfeet · 23/12/2022 01:00

I usually love Christmas, but df has just had to move into a nursing home, which I feel very guilty about. I know he's not happy there, but I just can't manage him with us, along with dc and work.

So Christmas day will now be 30 mins drive each way to bring him here, dp will sulk as he would rather it be just us, I can't drink, then driving him back to the home he doesn't like. Shitty this year and I can't be bothered at all - not done usual prep as so much time taken in recent weeks by df, and as all prep falls to me it just means lots won't happen. And the one present I really wanted, I ordered so df could give it me, has now been declared undeliverable even though I was in all day, returned to sender, and now put of stock so can't be reordered. So passed off!

constantindigestion · 23/12/2022 01:03

Really not feeling it this year. We are skint so haven't been able to buy the kids much, and living in a tropical country (whilst lovely) doesn't make it feel Christmassy.
Also feeling a little cynical about the commercialisation of it all, and societal pressure to do everything that's related to it. Feel like I'm
Just doing it because I'm supposed to. I'm not religious by any means and I just can't see the point.

WorryMcGee · 23/12/2022 01:20

I kind of do, and it makes me feel sad. It’s my DD’s first Christmas (she’s 8 months) but I just had my third cycle of chemo yesterday and I feel like utter shit. I’m so tired, don’t have any appetite, I look like hell, it all just feels unfair and spoilt 😞 we’re going to stay with family so it’s not like I have to cook etc but the packing and travelling feels like a lot in and of itself. DH looks like he’s about to drop because he’s beyond tired as well.

CookieMoolier · 23/12/2022 02:19

I'm the same OP. I lost my job a couple of months ago due to long Covid. Been trying to get a new one but I need to rethink how I explain how I lost last job. We are really skint this year.All our money has went on gas and leckyy( prepayment meters). Our shitty car has died and is getting scrapped. We need a new cooker after New Year. Usually I have cupboard full of food. We have older children so spend money on my 16 year old DD( she didnt ask for much- roller boots). My DS is in his twenties and isn't come to us on Christmas as staying with girlfriend . He says he coming for New Year though. My father in law is terminal with cancer and unable to eat much as undergoing chemo.
So Christmas will be very quiet . Can't be arsed this year and I usually love Christmas

CookieMoolier · 23/12/2022 02:21

@WorryMcGee for you 💐

ItsMeHiImTheProblem · 23/12/2022 02:23

Me too. I do it for my family, my kids are grown up, so it's just for my mum really. None of my kids are coming to see me, which makes me sad, but then they just see it as another normal day too. It's cost me too much as they all just wanted money, so I'll have to be very careful and frugal in January. Roll on the summer, I long for warmth and sunshine and long days!

Greatly · 23/12/2022 02:27

Hi all. Christmas couldn't have come at a worst time this year as my dsis is very ill in hospital a 3 hour drive away (and in Central London so hard to drive to anyway). I just want Christmas out of the way so I can get back to visiting. I've just seen there's more train strikes in the new year. Meanwhile my dh and dcs are all at home determined for me to have a lovely Christmas and I am going to have to grit my teeth and pretend it's all marvellous.

Theoldwoman · 23/12/2022 02:31

Well it’s certainly summer here, it’s been around 39 degrees Celsius all week which just makes going out so hard. I suffer from migraines with the heat, my pup has kenn cough so we are stuck at home basically. Can’t wait for Boxing Day.

HowVeryBizarre · 23/12/2022 04:57

Of course you should be allowed to say it. It has got to be the time of year when there is the greatest pressure for everyone to conform to this bizarre, essentially extremely conservative idea of what family is and what “a proper Christmas” should look like. I actually love Christmas but tbh I am really starting to get extremely tired of having to produce a magical experience for my now grown up kids where any deviation from tradition is greeted with howls of outrage. I gently suggested going away this year only to have my eldest guilt me because I am supposed to continue it now for his kids. For how long? Shoot me now!

Greatly · 23/12/2022 05:15

HowVeryBizarre · 23/12/2022 04:57

Of course you should be allowed to say it. It has got to be the time of year when there is the greatest pressure for everyone to conform to this bizarre, essentially extremely conservative idea of what family is and what “a proper Christmas” should look like. I actually love Christmas but tbh I am really starting to get extremely tired of having to produce a magical experience for my now grown up kids where any deviation from tradition is greeted with howls of outrage. I gently suggested going away this year only to have my eldest guilt me because I am supposed to continue it now for his kids. For how long? Shoot me now!

I also have grown up (early 20s,late teens) Christmas dictators. I'm doing a big chicken for xmas lunch because its cheap and for me, stress free because I cook roast chicken so often. We normally have an extremely expensive fillet of beef. On learning of this, middle dc was so put out they flounced upstairs.