I’m dreading Christmas Day as my dc have barely and gifts

[Bluebellberry]

Things have been finically dreadful for us.
I normally love Christmas but this year I am dreading it.
We are struggling so badly we only have a couple of very, very small low cost gifts for each child. I am so deeply ashamed.I am dreading seeing their faces on Christmas morning. They only asked for 2 small things bless them but I still feel an absolute failure.
I have absolutely nothing to give to my siblings or parents.
I have nobody to talk too irl as close friends and family don’t have money issues.
Is anyone else in this position?

I was always the one with less than my friends. It genuinely didn't matter, everyone's Christmases are different. Make some magical traditions- even if its just always watching the same Christmas programme or something like that.

Will your family give them any presents?

I come from a family that was very poor for quite a few years and had very few presents. Your children will know you don't have much which is why they have only asked for low cost things. But still try and make it a fun day. I still enjoyed Christmas because my mum made me it a fun day.

And don't worry about presents for adults in your family. That really does not matter.
Do your parents really not realise you are struggling?

I couldn't afford many gifts for my children a couple of years ago so I instead made hand made vouchers.

I wrapped them seperately so they had things to open and they included things like

Girls pamper day

Trip to the seaside

Trip to crazy golf
Trip to the zoo
Movie night

Etc and i then managed to pay for the gifts as we needed them through the year. They were allowed 'spend' one voucher a month.

Many were cheap eg Trip to magical forest where we just went to a local forest and took a picnic.

For the zoo and other things I was able to use wowcher / groupon throughout the year to get cheap tickets to places thing I managed to get 3 x zoo tickets for £18 and again we took our own food.

Still to this day whenever I ask my children what they want for Christmas they always ask for the vouchers.

I don't know how old your children are but I also managed to make mine 'baking kits' pretty cheap.
It was literally cornflake cakes but they really enjoyed it. I put some cornflakes in a sandwich bag and decorated with Christmas pictures (again drew myself) then bought a large chocolate bar from the supermarket (own brand) for 89p and some sprinkles put them all together nicely and it was another gift they could make.

The works have things for 99p that are good too.

I don’t think it’s about the gifts.

One of the only gifts that I remember when really young was a wrapped box of Tesco brand Frosties cereal. I wasn’t usually allowed sugary cereal. My parents that year in retrospect had no money but this gift was absolutely magical to me. My dad and I sat on the floor had a cereal picnic and watched cartoons.

Are you able to afford a small box of Celebrations or similar? You could do hide them around the garden and the DC could hunt for them.

I’ve been there OP and I know how shitty it feels. I used to buy only 3 toys for each dc, and then bulk out the tree with clothes, chocolates (yep I used to wrap up the £1 selection boxes!), bubble baths - that sort of thing. So they still had plenty to open but a lot of that they needed and I would’ve had to buy soon anyway. I still pretty much follow that formula even though I can afford more.

Can you talk to your family? If they have no money issues maybe they can help you out?
I would definitely help my siblings out.

Christmas pass the parcel (you can use the gifts you have if you cant stretch to extra sweets or choc) , so for each extra layer make up Christmas themed forfeits you have to do before tell a snowman joke , do a Father Christmas impression etc.

A snowman hunt - draw some snowmen and hide them round the house

Any party game but Christmas themed- Simon says, musical chairs/statues, charades , dancing competition etc.

Have a look on Twinkl, the teacher resource website (they have a free membership level) there is usually some have good ideas on there. And Pinterest has some good suggestions as well.

And please don’t worry, my family didn’t have much money when I was growing up and we always enjoyed Christmas- you don’t need lots of presents, kids are happy being played with .

And hey , you are doing great, chin up and all the best !

I echo the suggestion of charity shops. I spend half my life in charity shops and they're full of toys, games, books etc at very low cost. I appreciate that sometimes even a spare £1 might be out of reach, though

How old are they? Lots of people having clear outs and giving things away on local Facebook sites, maybe have a look? If they’re going to be gifts from other family members that’ll take the pressure off.

Agree that it’s highly unlikely your DC will remember what they got for Christmas in the great scheme of things depending on their ages if they’re primary school age and under. You got what they asked for and presuming they’ll get presents from other family so they’ll have presents to open.

Teens are old enough to understand that you’re doing the best you can and lots of families are in the same boat. Don’t ever feel ashamed about your financial situation. The fact you love your DC enough to want to give them more is enough.

Make the day special in other ways. Family games even Hangman if you don’t have board games, drawing funny pictures of each other, best joke competition, watch a movie together, a walk together, have a dance off. They’ll remember that more than the presents in future.

It’s easy to say but very true. Some DC will get lots of expensive presents and spend the rest of their day gaming or on their expensive new phones, some parents will drink too much and have fights/fall asleep, dinner will get burnt, police might get called etc, etc. Just enjoy your day with your DC.

I can only remember one present I got as a child, but I do remember fun times. Honestly my kids don't seem to value their toys at all. They do love playing games together etc

They do have the important present in their lives, your love.
I have been there. I actually bought my DDs presents once on Boxing Day after been paid, with her alongside me and she was little! She was so so about Santa till that day....

Time together is the real present. I swear I remember our struggles together fondly and in detail, but not so much all the presents I got her once I got in a better situation.
Regarding grown ups, just say the truth to your family. Surely we can all understand, especially in the middle of this.

Can you stretch to a roll of cheap lining paper and some pens to bulk out the presents? Drawing on lining paper and laying on the floor playing paper games like noughts and crosses and squares is great fun. Dig out any old magazines you might have laying around to make collages etc.

A pack of balloons for 'keep uppy' and make it competitive, have teams, stick the sofa in the middle of the room as a net so it's like volleyball.

One of DDs favourite presents was a big roll of bubble wrap lasted her ages and like the lining paper is cheap but large to bulk out the pile.

Ask around for old newspapers and cardboard boxes and make up some flour glue for papier mache.

Christmas is about spending time together and it's the novelty things they'll remember not a big pile of plastic.

Don’t be ashamed. Speak to your parents and siblings- hopefully they will be supportive and helpful.
What age are your children?

This! If someone asked this i would have a look for good condition items I’d be glad to see going to good use. Or get to a charity shop or car boot?

Oh and bog standard playing cards and use chocolate for wagers, learn different games to play. If anyone in the family has small hands you can get card holders for quite a low price on etsy and amazon.

No shade meant here at all but I’m actually surprised at how shocking I find that suggestion.

Is it just me?

If you tell us which county you are in then people may know of more local resources?

I would echo filling the day full of treats, as a kid if I could have had pancakes for lunch and alphabites for dinner I would have thought it was the best thing ever especially if we could watch cartoons all day. Netflix do free trials but make sure to cancel.

There is a make £10 a day thread on the Money Matters boards on here and on Money Saving Expert. I used to do surveys and Swagbucks to make a little extra to pay for Christmas and birthdays.

Oh OP. A lot of people are struggling with it this year, moreso than usual.

What I remember from my childhood Christmases is the year Papa fell backwards into the freezing pond, the hilarious game of Newmarket my Granny took way too seriously, the year we had our parents best friends over and their kids, the year my sister hosted with her family and in laws coming and my dog took a shit in my boot, when my brothers came down from where they lived with their Dad and our other grandparents and my cousins and the year we were all too sick to eat so had to have Christmas dinner the following weekend just me, Dad and Mum.

Could I tell you what gifts I got, how many or whether anyone around me got more or less/more expensive or cheap? Absolutely fucking not. I can't even remember what they got me last year.

Give them quality time, because thats what they will remember <3

As a child the only presents I can remember was a red jumper my cousin also got one and she was smaller than me and we mixed them up, I know now our parents sorted it but I refused to wear my jumper after that as I was convinced it wasn't my one.
I can also remember a doll and a teddy but only because their was a photo of me with them.
What I do remember is playing games and laughing so much playing a game called "killer"
I don't even remember the dinners.
Search Facebook market place for free things as books games dvds are hard things to sell now so many people give them for free.

Aww this is sad, look on Facebook toy appeal in your area. There’s also Facebook pages people donating toys etc. I have given away loads of almost brand new things my kids never played with . I was in a charity shop the other day and there was lot’s of brand new toys there .

Hi OP. What age are your children? Like others said, if you want to PM me, I have some things I could pass on.

I would go and look in the charity shops. Half of the presents for my two are second hand including he main presents and some other bits I’ve made! Books are usually less than 50p in the charity shops

I also wrap a tube of tooth paste, tooth brush, flannel, notebook, pens that sort of thing to bulk out the stocking

definitely speak to your parents and siblings it wouldn’t take much money to get a few more presents. £10 for each child would make quite a difference