Can’t say it to those close to you? Come say it here. Judgement free zone.

[OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow]

I’ve 4 grown kids. They are all here for Christmas. Ds1 is going home today. I can’t wait. (Of all of them hardest to get on with, hates his brother-it’s mutual. He’s a lazy git.) I’ll be able to relax when he’s gone.
I am also looking forward to dh being in work tomorrow so me and Dd can sprawl on sofa watching shite.
I also hate Christmas cooking.

Mil, dh and fil are allllll in the kitchen trying to cook. It’s a once a year thing. Everything is frozen or ready made from the Yorkshire’s to the gravy. All you have to do is pop, ping and fucking serve. They are making such a meal out of it. Or rather not! The kids are starving hungry and I’m getting progressively drunk. It’s not that hard! I could have had the whole thing on the table a hour ago!

Recovering from Covid, still get very tired, very quickly and no taste/smell.
Cooked for 10 on Christmas Day with no help. Tidied up all the pots etc. and continued to offer drinks/snacks as no-one else did anything.
Presents received weren't great, clearly not much thought gone into any of them.
Neighbours are being stupidly loud, I hate this house so much but trapped as catchment for good schools and detached house are well above our price range
I used to love Christmas but now I am starting to hate it.

It does feel good to write this all down and not be judged

Dear sister

I am not neurotic or crazy; I just don't like you.

Yours sincerely
Sarah JP

Stop bloody sniffing! Just blow your nose. Job done.
Ugh. Snort, snort, snort, swallow.

we have a lovely life. Nice flat, grumpy teenage boy (nothing extra), stupid -but lovely- cat. My H has been wfh for the past 5 years. I have been working out of home for some years, but wfh in the past 2, as I work for a foreign bank. Kid has not been in school since beginning of december due to a minor toe surgery.
I love them and everything, but I want all 3 (incl. the cat) to fuck off for just 1 whole day. Nothing more.

It's the minute things that grind me up:

• "when is dinner going to be ready?" I haven't even started, so what do you think?
• "what's there to eat?" There is a kitchen with fridge. open it and figure it out. You are 16 ffs.
• every single time i close the bedroom door to practice bass my H has a very important thing he can only do in the bedroom. Like lie on the bed and play on his tablet or read. It's as if we didn't have a sofa. Or he let's the cat in. And she has a thing about my bass guitar: loves hiding behind it, but when I pick it up she has to start biting my ankle. every single time..... I am extremely aware how much m playing sucks. I have started a few months ago. I don't need him pointing out my mistakes. Or the cat biting harder when she doesn't like the genre.....

I just want 1 day alone. is it too much to ask for?

Bloody hell MUM! I know there were sibling rivalry issues and your brother was favoured because he was a boy and, yes, it was unfair, but for goodness sake speaking at his funeral was not the time to bring it up.

I wish DP had bought me a gift that he'd chosen instead of things he got me to buy then give to him to give me on xmas day. It actually made me sad more this year than it has before, he does this every year. I feel a bit like a spoiled bratt but seeing all the lovely thoughtfull gifts (not expensive either) friends on facebook got off their DPs made me feel extra sad, don't know why.

I had my DF round on both Christmas and Boxing Day as I have for the past 8 years since my mum died and before that had both him and my mum for the 7 years prior to that. My DSis always goes away at Christmas so I have no choice but to be stuck with him every.single.fucking.year...

I have to admit I am getting a bit resentful that we have no choice to go away at Christmas or spend a Christmas day with just my DCs.

DSis does see him and he goes round to hers for lunch every so often ( she lives about 30 mins away) but I live very close so I am the goto person if he wants anything/ needs any help. DH and I want to move somewhere about an hour away ( about 20 mins further on than where DSis lives) but not sure if we will be able to do this.

I love DF to bits but he drives me a bit potty as he is quite self obsessed and drones on about the same old boring crap every time I see him ( at least twice a week) I feel really mean thinking this way but it just doesn't seem very fair that most of this fall to me.. ( doesn't help that MiL also lives nearby- DH is also the goto DC even though his DB and DSis also live quite near. )

Can't say this to anyone as feels mean but nice to be able to voice it here.

I'm fed up of my in-laws favouring SIL over DH!! It's all so subtle and slowly crept in over the years, so they don't even notice. But DH does. I hate the quietly sad resignation in his eyes when he sees them yet again favouring her and her kids.

At least DH and my Dad get on great!

DSis, how on earth have you encouraged your 3 girls to produce Xmas lists with only highly specific designer items on? It's not having standards, it's breathtakingly entitled. I love my DNieces but I wouldn't even get that for myself!

It's wasn't Christmassy at all this year. I didn't feel Christmassy one bit and I'm sad about it. I genuinely am wondering if I need antidepressants or something because it has been a hard year and I expected Christmas to be like the sigh of relief at the end, but I felt no joy at all. Annoyance that we had to cancel our pantomime visit due to thoughtless relative potentially infecting us with a known active Covid case, sadness that a friend died on Boxing Day and she hadn't told many people how unwell she was, and just this blank sort of...... if I could describe the feeling it would just be a massive sigh.

Christmas Day:

“Do you need any help?”

Well, 4 hours ago when the veggies needed peeling, the table laid, the pets fed, the dishwasher emptying - yes please - but it’s a bit late now as I’m carrying the roast turkey and trimmings to the table!

MIL: What time is dinner? I’m starving! I thought we were eating at 1?

Me: (under my breath) Really? All that smoked salmon and cream cheese, Quality Street, Pringles, peanuts, crisps and Prosecco that you’ve been consuming non stop since you got up not taken the edge of your appetite then?

DM: it is rude to tell me you didn't want the flowers I sent you last week.

It is rude to "helpfully" point out things that need doing in my house.

It is rude to refuse to open your main Christmas present until you get home.

It is rude to say "next year we'll do it differently" as you are leaving.

Just because I am your daughter does not make it acceptable. When you say these things, you are being rude!!!!!

We've had a lovely Christmas at DD's and could really have done with coming home for a few days peace on our own. Instead dd has come back here for a week complete with her dog. It's chaos and I'm counting the days until life is back to "normal".

I want a divorce
I want you to keep the dogs and children
I want a flat for one ,I’m happy to pop in each day and cook your dinner ,but then I want to go to my own home where everything is where I left it ,and I never have to clear up anyone else’s mess

Why do we do this to ourselves EVERY YEAR?!

I'm staying with parents, brother and his girlfriend who is a grown 28yo woman but acts like a 5yo that's had too much sugar, 24/7. She puts on baby voices, tries to tickle my brother every 5 mins etc. Can't have a conversation with her at all, she either completely misses the point, randomly shouts something out or does some impression/quotes a TV show. Exhausting. Oh and my dad is constantly cycling between telling the funniest stories of his life and getting furious over nothing and wanting to punch everyone. And that's when he's not ridiculing my poor mum for putting on weight or looking old. She lost her mum exactly a year ago, he has zero compassion. B***d. 16 hours to go.

DH and MIL had an almighty row Xmas day, MIL cried a lot. SIL and her fiancé sat on the sofa looking smug as fuck. MIL then ignored me and her grandchildren. I had to bite my tongue to not tell her how petty she was then being, sitting in her bedroom the morning after and ignoring me and my kids. We ended up leaving theirs a day early.

@DifficultBloodyWoman

I love my husband dearly and he is a wonderful man but if we have to do one more thing ‘together’, I’m going to start digging the foundations of a patio.

Ooh, digging a patio, that sounds fun - maybe it's something you could do together?

Sorry, couldn't resist.

I don't belong on this thread, but sending sympathy / strength / wine / an alibi to those who need it.

@FlipFlops4Me

My lovely DH had a stroke last June. He has recovered partially but does his very best. My DS and DIL invited us over to theirs - her first time hosting - and they did a great job of it. She really did. I was so grateful.

My DSis came with us. And was her usual snippy self - it's as if she doesn't realise that the expressions on her face show how irritated and pissed off she is. All the time.

DH told me that he'd felt every sneery look at him (he is blind on one side, and a bit clumsy with cutlery - but he's my miracle and I love him with a fierce, protective massive love). He said she made him feel as if he hadn't the right to sit at the table with the "normal" people. I could have cried for him.

I'm not going to ask DS and DIL to invite her next year..... she can be alone and bloody like it.

Wow - your love for your husband shines out of this post - it's so lovely to read, and so very rare on this website.

I laughed at the “then fuck off some more” comment. Funny line.

At 7 months preggos I’d be signing the “I’m so tired I must rest for the baby” song whilst sitting on my ass demanding mince pies and die hard.

@Totalwasteofpaper

My mil invited herself for the full period we were off 23rd -28th and it is my last childfree Christmas.

She won't shut up about my BIL who isnt here because he was too cheap and lazy to come home she is enmeshed with and favours to an outrageous degree. Bil got gifts worth £1k, we got a baby monitor which is a joint Christmas present combined with baby gift a regifted bath set and mens jumper worth £200 max.

It also transpires she gives him about £400 pm - he is a grown adult man with a job.

She brought fuck all down with her and keeps trying to drink my good wine.

Dh is a mix of sad angry and wanting to keep the peace.
I can't relax in my own home.
I hate it. It's shit.

I wish she would fuck off to the far side of fuck. Then fuck off some more.

Now I'll go down and smile at her and ask her she slept while tidying up after her and making her drinks despite me being 7 months pregnant

Forgot to tag the comment! Woopsy!

My children wanted Christmas away from home. I was and am ecstatic. I sent cards, told them postage is so much to buy their own gifts, since last year I gave them tat.
It has been an amazing Christmas alone.
So blooming happy.

"Christmas Day:

“Do you need any help?”

Well, 4 hours ago when the veggies needed peeling, the table laid, the pets fed, the dishwasher emptying - yes please - but it’s a bit late now as I’m carrying the roast turkey and trimmings to the table!"

Yes, yes, yes to this! My mum sat downstairs on Christmas Eve waiting for me and DH to finish work at 5pm. Then sat and watched us make stuffing, profiteroles, gravy, peel all the veg... We were knackered after a long week, and she didn't even put the bloody kettle on for us, I had to make her cups of tea! I asked her to peel potatoes but they were muddy and she doesn't know how to use our peeler

This is completely expected though, it's always been this way. She gives cash to us every Christmas which, in her mind, buys her a festive, full board break at our house.

I love her and I know when we arrange her visit that she'll never be willing to get stuck in with anything, so I put up with it because one day I'll miss having to turn my back and mouth terrible things to the ceiling.

My stepdad spent Xmas Eve, Xmas Day and Boxing Day moaning about what a burden my Mum is in front of her. She has dementia and then she's crying because she feels bad. He refused to eat any of the food we bought and sat in the corner, arms folded. Probably my last Christmas with my Mum ruined by this selfish prick.

Had to stay in a b and b as none of my family offered us to stay with them and felt really left out and excluded same as last Yr because we don't have children.

Another family member decided it was the right time to let slip a 15 yr old family secret when drunk and got a present from last Christmas from my Dad who died this February. He bought me a thing about what a great daughter I was - we hadn't spoken for 10yrs before the day he died.

Next year I just want to fuck off somewhere sunny.

Second vote for an incredibly moving post @FlipFlops4Me. More power to your dh's elbow (good one and less good one).