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Original poster

Would you expect to provide all alcohol over Christmas for your young adult children?

185 replies

MacNTosh · 21/12/2021 18:11

DC’s all at Uni are home for Christmas and it’s lovely to have them all here, but I’m feeling a little miffed about them drinking any booze we get in ie. bottle of gin was drunk in one night, I had two drinks they drank the rest. Dh and I have cut down the amount we drink over the last couple of years which has coincided with the dcs being older/going to Uni. I can’t work out if I’m being a bit miserable and should just accept that they’re enjoying not having to live on a budget at home and just let it go or if they should be getting their own drinks at this age.

Christmas Day/Boxing Day will be covered as various family members are all bringing wine etc as are we.

They have part time jobs so have money in theory although one has spent everything this month.

What do you think?
A. It’s Christmas, they’re students, provide all the booze
B. They should buy their own some of the time

OP posts:
Kbyodjs · 21/12/2021 18:36

I would say A but if you don’t want them drinking something specific (like your gin) then just say “you’re welcome to have one but don’t drink it all as I want some tomorrow”

Bellsandsnow · 21/12/2021 18:36

Lol I would just go to Aldi and get cheap booze and maybe hide the nice stuff? 😉 We bought our own alcohol when we came back from uni but that was mainly because my parents drink cheap wine.

Twiceover · 21/12/2021 18:37

A - would never have occurred to me to buy my own booze at home as a student. But didn't have siblings to get stuck in with - sadly! Certainly wouldn't begrudge this for my own kids when the time comes.

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza · 21/12/2021 18:37

I remember my folks instituted a rule - there was a cupboard beside the wine cellar for the plonk. We could drink as much plonk as we wanted (it was positively encouraged) but absolutely woe betide you if you decided to go poking about for a bottle that “didn’t look that expensive”.

One notorious incident made it into the speeches at my sister’s wedding!

Itsnotdeep · 21/12/2021 18:37

A, I haven't bought the booze yet, but mine will drink prosecco with me, and then vodka stuff in the evenings. We don't drink together at other times really, so although they got home last week they haven't drank anything yet.

AMerryNickelChristmas · 21/12/2021 18:39

@WhatHaveIFound

A. It's Christmas and they deserve to have lots of lovely stuff to eat & drink after a term on a limited budget.

Having said that my own DD can only manage a couple of gins, not a whole bottle...

I can't imagine my parents would ever even consider only having one bottle of gin in for us. When we say what days we're coming, my dad asks "what do you want?" And makes sure there's aa good amount of a good variety.
LizziesTwin · 21/12/2021 18:40

I provide the alcohol we drink together but they buy their own for when we aren’t there.

babouchette · 21/12/2021 18:41

My parents only ever had wine at home, no spirits, so this wasn't an issue for me. I had to bring anything I wanted with me, then endure the teeth sucking if I ever poured a G&T!

I'd probably just let them have it for the sake of familial harmony, although maybe drop some hints about replacing the gin before the shops close for Christmas!

AMerryNickelChristmas · 21/12/2021 18:41

The reason they necked the gin is because you didn't provide beer or anything else.
I would also drink the gin if that's all you provided.
I think my dad would bbe embarrassed not to have enough drink in.

Rosieparkerss · 21/12/2021 18:42

Oh come on! A

About10thusername · 21/12/2021 18:43

A - it's Christmas!
My elderly parents still get the booze in for us and we're middle aged.

Viviennemary · 21/12/2021 18:44

I sould expect to provide alcohol but I wouldn't expect a bottle of gin to be drunk in one night.

MrsLarry · 21/12/2021 18:45

A.
There might be a time when they won't be home for Christmas, so enjoy it while you can.

If there's anything specific you don't want them to drink then hide it.

goodwinter · 21/12/2021 18:49

A, but totally fine to earmark stuff you like for yourself so they don't drink the lot!

UndertheCedartree · 21/12/2021 18:53

Drinking a whole bottle of gin is a bit much! I mean of course it depends what you can afford. If it was me that would have been it as I wouldn't have been able to replace it. It's one thing to provide drink on CE, Christmas day and Boxing day but not all holiday, surely!

FreeElf · 21/12/2021 18:53

If money isn’t a problem let them enjoy Christmas all together! It’s really hard having to watch the money as a student, so holiday time it’s lovely to go home and not have to stress or worry about how much everything costs.

Thethreecs · 21/12/2021 18:58

I've the utility room stocked with all their favourite drinks. I always make sure there's plenty in to cover the holiday. I never had to buy alcohol when my parents were alive and that was even when I was married and had my own kids.

I love seeing them all together having a few drinks and having a laugh. A bottle doesn't last if there's a few drinking the same drink, also teens can handle drink much better.

I use to hate going to dhs for Christmas, they'd say they got drinks in and you'd be handed 4 cans and that was it. They'd have a shed full of drink but you never got any of it, it was mainly for their friends and themselves.

TwinkleTwinkleLittleStarFightr · 21/12/2021 18:59

How often are they drinking? I mean, was it a one off for the first night back home? And I presume they’ll have a drink at Christmas and new year. But surely not every night!

PegasusReturns · 21/12/2021 19:01

A - it’s Christmas and they’re your DC!!

WeRTheOnesWeHaveBeenWaitingFor · 21/12/2021 19:03

If you can comfortably afford it then why not but if you’re on a budget then you’ll need to get them to chip in.

UndertheCedartree · 21/12/2021 19:03

@AMerryNickelChristmas

The reason they necked the gin is because you didn't provide beer or anything else. I would also drink the gin if that's all you provided. I think my dad would bbe embarrassed not to have enough drink in.
Isn't that a bit entitled? I mean alcohol is expensive. I get one bottle in as that is all I can afford. If someone had drunk all that then that would be it and I would think they should be embarrassed not me, personally!
stillavid · 21/12/2021 19:05

I would certainly provide all alcohol but can afford it.

If it is a struggle financially for you then let them know.

4pmwinetimebebeh · 21/12/2021 19:06

A

Christmas1988 · 21/12/2021 19:10

A- I’d just buy regular brands though like Gordon’s gin or Teachers whisky I wouldn’t be getting expensive stuff if they don’t appreciate the quality.

Pickersgill · 21/12/2021 19:11

As long as I can afford it, it would be A. Even as a 40 something one of the joys of going to my parents house is the unlimited food and drink. Nowadays I send them expensive bottles for presents but they still see it as their mission to fill us full of drink when we visit. They've started on the kids now Grin

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