Do you have an "Impossible To Buy For" DP? Come hither, share your frustrations and your ideas

[SweatyTits]

I have an "Impossible To Buy For" (ITBF) DP.

There's just nothing he's particularly 'into' and he's pretty happy with the simple things in life.
We don't do 'big' presents for each other so that makes things easier but I still find myself wondering what on earth to get every year!

Added to my DP's pre-existing ITBF-ness, my mother insists that I buy all of her presents to DP as well. And, as if that's not enough it's also my DP's birthday a week before Christmas.

So, DP's ITBF-ness is tripled because I have to buy Christmas presents from me, Christmas presents from my mother, and birthday presents.

We don't do 'big' birthdays though so a few little things are okay.

I usually get DP a jumper or a hoody of some kind, a few bottles of expensive/unusual booze, and a few books as standard.
I also tend to get him a few bits and pieces for his office which would be a horrible, soulless white box if it wasn't for my flourishes

I've bought him a fancy advent calendar but that's not really a Christmas present as such.

At the moment, DP is developing a small hole in his jeans and I'm excited because it means I have another present idea - NEW JEANS

Ladies with ITBF DP's.... tell me your tales of woe, and let's share some ideas!

We don't do gifts because we tend to save and but stuff for ourselves when we want it.

Instead we book a few days away in the Easter holidays as MIL takes the kids for us. Nothing fancy mind, just a train ticket and a travel lodge does us!

We do get the kids to choose a token gift for each other so they have something to give but that has been all sorts from a pen, slippers, aftershave, dressing gown etc.

One of my issues is that DP just buys himself stuff when he wants/needs it throughout the year. DAMMIT. I have kind of banned him from buying himself things in the autumn/winter months so I can get him that thing for Christmas.

A surprise trip away would be lovely but we can't leave our dog so holidays and trips away are out of the question.

FiL is our problem. He has a couple of hobbies but has already got the latest and best of everything. He doesn’t drink and if he’s not at home or at his hobby, he’s working. Also a January birthday.

So far, all I can think of is winter gloves for his motorbike. Do you think I can get anyone in Wales to check his bloody glove size?!

My dad is impossible to buy for, retired, decent pension, house owned outright. If he wants it he buys it. I've bought an RHS book and a biography of someone related to plants.

Dh and fil. Neither drink, theyre not enthusiastic gardeners or diyers, not into sport and the things they are into they have nearly everything to do with it already and are also fussy about what they do get 🙄 I tend to go with pjs, belts and some form of chocolate but it feels very unexciting both to buy and to watch being unwrapped

I have one of these. He does have hobbies but he works in the industry his hobby is in so can get everything he wants on trade for that. He also buys himself the things he wants when he wants them. AND his birthday is in fucking December too. I never know what to get.

Yep. My DH has hobbies but things related to them have been done to death over the years and there’s nothing he needs now. It got to the point last year when I asked him if there’s anything he’d like and he asked for rope. I refused to buy that as a present and told him to just go and bloody buy some rope! His birthday is very soon so I’ve also been trying to think of double the ideas.

He does enjoy cooking so for his birthday I’ve taken a bit of a punt on a Spicery kit as I’ve seen it recommended so many times on these threads. Hope he likes it. And he wanted a belt. A bottle of whisky is standard but then I’m stuck!

I feel I have bought DH everything interesting that I can afford to buy him and now it's just the same boring crap:

Trainers
T-shirt
Gig ticket
Alcohol
maybe Chocolate

Alcohol, Chocolate and Gig tickets at least always get used.

Trainers and T-shirts are more hit and miss as half the time he complains they don't fit even though I get the size he says/wears.

Neither me nor DH are bothered about presents. We used to do a £10 spend on each other in the Pound Shop but now we've upped it to £20 to include Home Bargains.

Have you tried going a bit rogue? Maybe some lego? You can pick up Star Wars sets from around £20 so it wouldn’t be a huge waste of money if he looked at you like you’d had a bump on the head.

Or falconry/zookeeper experiences? Or a blacksmiths course (you can get a day making a knife or bbq tool in a forge for quite a reasonable price). Or a day on a race track, or a foraging experience, or a cooking lesson (curry, bbq, making sausages etc). Boots/trainers, aftershaves, satnav/dash cam, there’s a woman in Brighton who does experience days teaching everything from how to use power tools to making garden seats out of pallets, so I expect there would be similar in other places, a retro games console, an evening course, magazine subscriptions, TicketMaster vouchers, glass blowing experience, hair trimmers, a wet shave at a proper barbers, pig & hen bracelet, a guitar/ukulele, a camera &/or lesson in how to get the best out of it, sock and boxer subscriptions, a new phone, a fit bit, exercise gear/clothes, a nice watch, a posh man bag, rucksack or briefcase, a weekend bag, a silk tie if he has to wear them, a tie pin, cuff links, if you’re near the coast, a wetsuit and bodyboard, some very expensive whiskey, a selection of cigars from somewhere like Selfridges, beginner’s fishing gear, a sea fishing trip, if he’s a chocolate fan you could fill a box with every sort of chocolate known to man, you can get subscriptions for treats from different countries (the green Kit Kats from Japan stuck in my mind), tickets to a vintage cinema or a monthly cinema pass, a UK city break, you could sponsor an animal either abroad or in the UK (lots of sanctuary’s do this, as well as Dogs/Cats Trust and they send you updates on your animal throughout the year), grow your own Venus Flytrap/cucumelons/purple carrots, an ice shaving/slush puppy machine or a basketful of puppies.

It's experience days that work well. So far it's been: trying out diving, steam trains, walking experience, falconry.

My FIL is so difficult. He doesn't drink, doesn't read, doesn't cook, not into sports or gardening. He doesn't eat out nor go on holiday. He doesn't appreciate exotic food or quality stuff. No hobbies. He likes films, but he has already got Netflix and Amazon subscription.

We stopped buying gifts for his birthday as it is too stressful to get things, but we try to buy something for Christmas. He is a nice man, but I really don't want to waste my time thinking about gift for him.

2 years ago we gave him Amazon voucher and a Christmas jumper as a joke but he didn't like it. He even didn't try it on. Last year, we gave him a nice box of chocolate hoping it is ok as he used to like chocolates but now he says do not buy chocolate anymore as that makes him constipated
Honestly I don't know what to buy for him anymore

Not terribly exciting but just ordered a couple of books I think he’ll like…the new Richard Osman one as he really enjoyed Thursday Murder Club and Dave Grohl’s autobiography as he was a huge Nirvana fan in his youth and loves Foo Fighters. It’s a start!

@Sn0tnose do you know the name of the lady in Brighton please?

I have a referral code for £10 off at body shop if anyone would like it

DH is an absolute nightmare. He never needs clothes as mostly in workgear covered in overalls. Doesnt read, listen to music or have any hobbies. Theres only so much fram, tractor and landrover ornaments I want in my house.

I accidentally felted a lambswool jumper of his in the summer so I might replace that. My only great idea (new swim/beach towel) I've given to my DM.

Doesnt drink either. Bloody annoying.

Yes have this same problem. He usually gets whisky, nuts, PJ's, maybe a book ( but he's less keen on that). Likes his old comfy clothes!

One year I bought an experience gift. The company went bust before he could book it so I've gone right off that idea.

For your older DP I can suggest the Utility Vest - my dad saw someone wearing one and was all "OMG it has ALL the POCKETS" It's basically a waistcoat/gilet with extra pockets, sometimes sold as a fisherman's coat. That might just be my dad.

DH just wants an Ooni pizza oven.

I have just bought a car was set for mine. He is as impossible as all the others above!

I’ve got dh:

A canvas of the kids (we have a new one so needed a new canvas!)

3 cd’s

Waterbombs and launcher

Slippers

Can you make a hamper ? One year I made my DH and bought him posher stuff than we normally have - naice chutneys, jams, coffee, crackers chilli sauce etc, he loved it

I dread Christmas every year. I've suggested to DH that we just buy token gifts but he loves present shopping and feels hurt I feel it's such an effort.
His mum was into present buying too and was still doing her Christmas shopping up until she died. She always put a lot of thought into what to buy people.
Anyway, I digress. DH doesn't drink or smoke. He likes reading sciencey stuff which I have no clue about. Has tonnes of unused aftershave. His hobby, he has specific taste for what he requires.
His numerous wardrobes are bursting with clothes. The latest gadgets he fancies, he buys himself.
The bread maker, he talked about that I knew would be used once and left to rot I bought in desperation and guess what...
He gets the predictable shower gel, socks, pjs, racket grips, chocolate every year.
Glad I'm not the only one feels like this.

My DH is the same, and buys himself stuff year-round that would make ideal gifts, too 😭

Best things I brought him were a Subscription to www.thespicery.com/

Olive Magazine subscription

Bluetooth shower radio

Cheese making kit

Chilli sauce set

Zorbing experience

This is my DH too. I always end up trawling these threads on MN looking for ideas! His hobby is biking but he just buys everything as and when he needs it, so I can't really get anything directly useful.

HOWEVER someone once linked to belts made of used bicycle tires and THAT turned out to be a fab gift - it's recycled, vegan (DH is veggie), useful AND sort of related to his hobby. That was a really good gift!

The other thing that went down well has been something to make or build over the holidays: Lego ship in a bottle (he likes boating), a personalised jigsaw of his bike (it was a fab photo from a bike trip he did one, had lots of sky and sea in it so really good jigsaw!).

He also gets a calendar of the kids every year, but we make it a bit of a joint effort, so as well as photos of the dc we stick in little drawings or one year we did Dad Jokes on each page too.