Help me politely tell someone their gift is awful

[Dollyparton3]

So..... every year my parents spend a not insignificant amount of money on a hamper. Every year the same hamper from the same company contains the same items.

For the last 3 years the hamper itself has gone straight in recycling, the food items have gone into cupboards (I removed 3 packages yesterday that were out of date).

The wine that is included is not to our taste. Hubby and I are big wine lovers and to us this stuff is a bit like flavoured vinegar. I found 4 bottles of the wine untouched yesterday, I don't even think it's the sort of thing we can regift to others in a hurry.

Here's the dilemma. I told my parents very delicately last year that although the hamper was lovely, we didn't make use of half the items throughout the year so we'd really prefer something that the whole family can enjoy this year. Hubby was there when we said it. There was a definite conversation, I also said that some of it wasn't to our taste so it had gone to waste.

Yesterday morning I got a text from the hamper company saying my hamper yet again from them will arrive tomorrow. I'm now making plans to take all the food straight to a food bank.

I'm not a material person as in expectant of gifts but I do get really frustrated with waste. Especially when someone else is spending good money on something we absolutely won't use. Any thoughts on how to approach this?

I would like to say in support of OP, I have received hampers that have had some genuinely weird shit in them. I'm sure it appeals to some people, but I just couldn't be arsed trying to find a use for rosehip and jalapeño chutney and anchovy paste.

I also don't like risotto 😮

Hampers usually are a bit rubbish aren't they. You get a few nice treats but they're bulked out with rather humdrum stuff. And if I'm given one as a gift there's a good chance it arrives after I've already bought all my Christmas shopping myself.

In our house it goes in the cupboard and probably does get eaten eventually, but I'd rather have just a box of chocolates or biscuits.

I think you just have to say that you didn't like it much and you ended up never using half the stuff.

Just give to food bank.
End of.
Thank them for the generous food bank donation

Who throws away risotto rice? What a bizarre thing to do!

And why don’t the kids eat the biscuits at least?

I would throw away rice. Its the one food I cannot stand- just the smell of it makes me want to vomit. Its the only food i cannot stand.

It’s not wasted if it’s going to the food bank

"Give it to a local school as a 'prize' so they can raise funds."

This is a good idea but might be tricky timing since it presumably arrives only a few days before xmas.

Can you ask at you local nursing home if there is a resident that gets not visitors/gifts for Christmas and give it to them ?

I consider all unwanted gifts part of my charitable allocation for the year, and buy a few general treats after Christmas and think of those as my present.

Donate the hamper, buy a nice bottle of wine you approve of, and think of your parents when you drink it.

orange jellies covered in chocolate

Bagsies!

You can keep the boil-inna-bag sossidges, though.

Cook with the wine.

Just give it to the foodbank. No need to be shitty about it.

Say thanks, donate the food. No drama

Are the hampers set ones? I’d phone the hamper company and see if you can swap it to one you may prefer? Or see if you can swap for their decent wine?

You could even donate it as a raffle prize for charity. At least then, it would make me feel good that its doing some good for someone!

I was thinking this, too.

Don't eat chocolates or biscuits, throw away risotto rice, won't cook with the wine, pickles not to your taste. Your diet sounds very boring.

Here!!! There's nothing wrong with kale . . .

It sounds like it might be from Carluccio's?

My mother in law is a bit like this. They bring bags of cake, chocolates stuff like that AFTER Christmas- I just say thank you and give it to the food bank. No harm done really and people get something really nice 🤷🏼‍♀️

DingDongSchadenfreudeOnHigh

Here!!! There's nothing wrong with kale . . .

people may have only and possibly limited access to a single ring or a microwave oven.

People in bed and breakfast are often lucky if they have access to a kettle LaMarschallin

It's bloody disgusting that there are tens of thousands living in poverty like this in a country as rich as ours.

Cook the risotto rice with the wine - there are hundreds of recipes using these two ingredients.
I don't drink wine (but I do cook with it sometimes). I don't eat sweets. I do eat biscuits occasionally. I wouldn't eat a boil in the bag sausage. I don't eat pasta so if there are packets of fancy pasta in there I wouldn't use them either. So I think if I received that hamper I wouldn't eat much of it either. I think hampers are a tricky present - it's very unlikely that everything in the basket will be to someone's taste so there is likely to be quite a bit of waste.
I've received quite a few food items this year from various people - none of which I eat! They'll all be getting subtly re-gifted.

I think you should just donate the hamper to a charity so that they can raffle it. A lot of the items sound unsuitable for a food bank - look at a food bank's list of desired products to see the kind of things they take. They take things that are easy and cheap to cook - most people needing to use a food bank also have to be aware of electricity costs and risotto rice takes a lot of cooking! So if you did pick out the things a food bank could take you'd still end up with a lot to pass on somewhere else.

Freecycle it

Is it this one?

generous hamper

I'd say this is more a timing thing , you may have had this conversatuion a year ago but they probably forgot, plus they probably just put in an order for a few hampers at same time, so find out when they order their hampers , then next year contact them just before, say begining of December and say mum you know the lovely hampers you usually send us from x company, i found last years one wasnt really stuff we use, if your planning sending hampers again could you order one of the cheese and wine ones heres a link...or the kids would prefer this ...assuming its a company that has a selection of hampers most do,i suspect if you make it easier for them this might work. If the company doesnt do anything to your tastes then just ask them not to order one for you at all.

it sounds like their gift isnt awful its just you dont like it , its a pity it arrives so late as there are so many great causes would love a lovely hamper to auction or give to someone who would love the treat

I am returning all unwanted gifts this year, it’s empowering.
No longer will I accept seven little tubes of hand cream when I don’t use hand cream.
I’ve discovered that’s the beauty on online delivery presents, I can return them without telling the sender, the sender gets the money back to their card. They’ve had the fun of buying, I have the satisfaction of not wearing a jumper two sizes too small.

Im going to push the ‘lets only buy presents for the children’ thing next year.

Send exactly the same hamper to your parents next year. That will teach them