Poncetastic 2016

[WaitingForEgg]

Ok this thread may commence from midnight in honour of Fellatio. I sadly abandoned last years mid run due to pre-eclampsia and early birth of my December baby and therefore fully intend to throw myself fully into this years festivities:

"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

Let's surpass all poncestastic pasts please

This is the style of wreath I will be making this year. My Hobbycraft basket is filling up

Selfiestick, I don't think it's too late for bramble brandy. I only mine yesterday - a mix of big and small, depending on the patch. I wouldn't use them if they were dried up or over-ripe though...

Two attempts at poncing last year. could not find a photo of finished wreath but this one was work in progress.

I have been reading and loving the poncing threads for years, so I get the reference, but I have to commend this thread for having the most incongruous opening line ever.

Christmas sweater bunting = adorable.

Perfect ornament for a 14-year-old boy: bacon!

selfie the brambles are in their finest week where I am- after a couple of weeks of collecting small bags at a time we got about 2.5kg in one smAll patch te other day. Would have gotten same again yesterday of I hadn't disturbed a wasps nest

I'd say go for it- just watch out for underground wasp burrows! It looked like from all the unripe berries there is at least a week or two left of picking.

Hurrrraaayyy
My second poncing year. Made a wreath with pinecones and dried oranges last year, plus alot of toddler pining with salt dough Dec's and raffia etc etc
Have already made my christmas cake, puddings and mincemeat which are all ticking over nicely.
Actually got myself accidentally pissed in the middle of the day making the mincemeat so I have excellent hopes for it
I'm aiming for kind of peacock colours with an decadent eccentric vibe as my overall theme this year.
Can't wait!

Thanks cookie!

taxworries Diary of a Quilter has a great (free) stocking tutorial

New to poncing, looking forward to it

First year formally Poncing.... Last year made 20 crochet Terry's chocolate orange covers for nursery. Not sure what I'll get done this year as I'm due Turnip2 on the 16th December!

Pic attached.

Also made countless mince pie Santa plates!

Ahhhh. My happy place. I'm definitely in this year as it's our first proper family Christmas at home. I'm so excited! I am about half way through my present shopping so my thoughts are turning to decorations. Need to find a good source of pine cones in Midlothian if anyone has any ideas?

I'm thinking of spray painting a polystyrene wreath form in a peacock colour, wrapping it in Ivory organza and decorating with peacock feathers, charity shop costume jewellery and hessian roses

Similar fireplace garlands too

Oooh. I'm not sure I can do a full on ponce, maybe a poncette if someone can help me ?

Our holly tree is doing berries this year like it's never going to do them again. Can someone send me a link to a holly wreath recipe ??

rowboat Dalkeith country park? Saw a few last week but for once weren't collwcting them (have bags of them so far) or somewhere like vogrie. Or if you are lucky, like us one of your neighbours might have a tree which drops millions on the road.

My DS insists on Aunt Bessie Christmas Puddings with all roast/Sunday/Christmas Dinners

Yayy! So happy, came here specifically to find this thread. I have more time this year so will be more poncey than the last couple. I don't know what I want to make yet but I do have lots of home grown lavender, chillis, mint and some rosemary too. Any ideas?

taxworries, those felt ornaments are gorgeous but I can't believe how much the patterns are! Still a bit tempted but need to have a word with myself...

Right, I have now read the thread updates (hadn't refreshed earlier).

Stubble that's brilliant, but... 20? 😮 Is the pattern somewhere on t'interweb or did you make it up? I'd love to see DH's face if that was encasing his usual chocolate orange in his stocking. He does a fair bit of eye rolling at my Christmas crafting. This was his face at the sprout jumper --->

Thanks for the bunting love! If anyone wants to make them the pattern is here, it's quite easy and quick. There's limited designs with it but it's quite easy to make them up - I just draw them on squared paper and knit them up.

www.theknittinghut.co.uk/free-patterns

Was a bit disappointed to see that the apple butter recipe wasn't heavily reliant on actual butter this is why I need to diet Still looks good though, and DS might like it. How long would it keep for, do you think?

I've not had the chance to go
Bkackberrying this year, am all envious of those who have had a good haul.

Yeah, 20. She was in 2 classes plus added helpers (and a couple of extras for gifts) I had cramp in one hand, most difficult was the leaves I'm not good at detail The pattern is free, I had to amend it slightly as I crochet loose.

Chocolate orange is here: beatonsmismanagement.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/freebie-festive-pattern-crochet.html?spref=pi&m=1

Holly leaf was from Attic24 blog: attic24.typepad.com/weblog/holly-leaves.html

There's a few patterns for Ferrero roche holders too, my fave is a booklet here: www.khh.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/2015-christmas-knitting-booklet.pdf

I love a bit of Christmas Poncing

I am pintresting like a woman possessed.

fantastic. i might actually have time this year considering i dont have a wedding (5 days before christmas) to plan, and i am no longer working. yay

That's weird, I am sure I posted earlier this morning.

Well anyway, just wanted to say thanks to Stubble, I am definitely doing that for DH. He will be super impressed. Or will roll his eyes. Either way I will be amused.

It does look good!!

DH reminded me, I made stollen for neighbours last year - which was a huge success. Can post the recipe if anyone wants it.

Yes please stubble!