Poncetastic 2016

[WaitingForEgg]

Ok this thread may commence from midnight in honour of Fellatio. I sadly abandoned last years mid run due to pre-eclampsia and early birth of my December baby and therefore fully intend to throw myself fully into this years festivities:

"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

Let's surpass all poncestastic pasts please

Welcome Dora
For a second reading your post I thought you might be my DM as she is currently having her kitchen and craft area renovated! She is not from the states though so safe to say you aren't her!

hairspray I hope your DHs fingers are ok! I'm using your hamper list for inspiration - I'm going to do a couple of 'sweet treats' hampers with mini Christmas cakes and biscotti, choc, fudge etc and would like to make most of it if I can! One question though - I don't want to spend loads on jars so what would be best to put the stuff in?

I'm loving the cheeseboard - do you think it's overkill for just me and dp though?!

The range had some very reasonably priced jars I saw somewhere. I have made interesting frackers for cheese and bonfire toffee previously. And homemade cheese. That was quite a year!

Depending on how many jars you need, Ikea do these for 80p each, 500ml sized.
www.ikea.com/gb/en/products/cookware/food-storage-organising/korken-jar-with-lid-clear-glass-art-70213545/

These ones are nice too, I could see fudge/sweets in these, a little bit pricier though! www.ikea.com/gb/en/products/cookware/food-storage-organising/vardagen-jar-with-lid-clear-glass-art-40291926/

I'm thinking about mini Christmas cakes too. I've never made my own one all by myself before, let alone miniatures! When I've made them at school (back in the day ) we used Heinz treacle pudding tins, but I think they might be a bit large for what I want to do. Does anyone have any suggestions?

littletike
It was my dad but he is ok now! I think it is still bandaged mind you!
I get my jars from lakeland, their own brand ones are really reasonably priced and for "sweet treats" fudge ect. I either use lakeland gifting presentation bags or I pop them in hummus pots I have collected and cleaned out all year, line with waxed paper and pop a circle of colored card with a label on the lid.

I have just been donated several largeish clip top lid jars and I am not sure what to do with them yet but I will find something I'm sure! Not a fan of the layered cake mixes or things like that so I may have to be creative!

Also just come across these gift bags on the Lakeland website - they'd be nice for fudge www.lakeland.co.uk/71892/12-Reindeer-Treat-Bags

Finally catching up! Have been meaning to post since the thread started.

Am aiming to be more poncetastic this year and get the dc involved so we'll be going all or for paper chains, snowflakes etc rather than the more grown up look we have had in the past. But before we do anything else, we must make the cards which we've been doing every year for c. 15 years. No idea what we're going to do...

Would agree Xmas dinner in Xmas eve is great. My mum did this with us and it had the added benefit of filling our tummies so we fell off to sleep really quickly. I tend to do big meal on Xmas Eve which is a mash up of various Euro traditions (we always start with Polish mushroom and cabbage pierogi) but still do a big meal on Xmas Day, but I have been known to start menu planning for Xmas week as early as May. This year I'm planning to be more spontaneous and am going to leave it to Xmas Eve to see what meat I can get for the next day!

The only thing I have managed to do do far is to get the quince brandy underway as had a good crop this year.

Baggy, I use tuna tins for my mini Christmas cakes. They worked really well last year. Had to be thoroughly washed, mind

Oh oh oh I want to play!

I have already been foraging for chestnuts and made a trial run of chestnut and chocolate roulade with rest of chestnut paste in the freezer for later.

Going to my mums for the big day so she will do most of the big stuff but I am thinking I will try some stollen, ginger cake and maybe attempt the peppermint bark.

We are having a cheese and wine party the weekend before so any recommendations for Christmassy nibbles would be great.

I am also really feeling the natural decorations this year. I am definitely going to make my own wreath and will try and find some holly and mistletoe to pick. Also very excited about the flavoured gin!

Here is a pic of the bauble wreath I made a couple of years ago to help get in the mood. It's still sort of going strong but I wish I'd been arsed heeded the advice to stick the baubles on as they all ping off everywhere!

TyrannosaurusBex Yes a thorough washing, I wouldn't fancy a fishmas cake!

Love that bauble wreath! I bought a cheapish one from tesco last year and gussied it up with holly etc. I wanted to make sure I had a sturdy base!

TyrannosaurusBex wouldn't fancy a fishy cake! I got a larger sweetcorn tin prepared, I was a bit taken aback when it was white inside though - now second guessing myself and wondering if there is something inferior about a sweetcorn can compared to other tins!

Good food mag arrived today. Cant wait to have a good look through for some new ideas.

Not really an eggnog fan but these look nice ...

What is eggnog? I always thought it sounded a bit grim, do you have it hot or cold? Is it like a Snowball? It seems like a confusing subject to me

Hairspray, it's sort of like a thin, alcoholic custard. Americans seem
to love it (as did the Brits in the 19thC) but I'd rather have mulled wine

In America you can buy it in cartons, like milk Behold!
I'm not a fan. I tried an Eggnog latte from Starbucks one year and it tasted a bit like a runny pancake.

I got my Christmas cakes made today! Seven 3" cakes, using sweetcorn tins. I only had 4 tins so had to make them in two batches, but they turned out well. They're wrapped and in storage waiting their first feed in a couple of weeks. Just need to decide whether to fully ice them or just to a marzipan and icing disc on top of each of them.

Ooh not a fan of custard so maybe I won't bother with it! Stick with mulled wine and cider! Buying it in cartons! That gets a F- for poncing effort
Lovely cakes Baggy!

I had spiced apple juice with rum at Greenwich market the other day and it was amazing. Need to try and recreate it at home This may require going back and trying a few more samples. Purely for scientific research purposes of course

That is a thing of beauty, Tartle.

Baggy Fully ice those babies with spiky snowy looking icing and finish with a retro ribbon and plastic merry christmas decoration!

Thank you Mathanxiety. It was really easy- an old wire coat hanger and a bumper box of baubles from tesco. Just snip the end, make a circle and thread the baubles on. Then twist it back together and hide hook with a ribbon. Hardest thing is stopping the bloody baubles pinging off the hooks and hiding under furniture!

THANK YOU DORA! I am defo getting some of that periodic table oilcloth. Only problem is my dining table is circular and much wider than any fabric, so I will need to sew two lengths together. I am not sure it will look great but on the other hand, permanently smeary glass isn't a great look either but it will protect the table and be more practical for everyday than the bare glass.

Not much poncing here yet. Been on holiday, and not had much time since. I am working up to a chutney. Still don't know what our Christmas plans are but I expect i will make puddings but not Christmas cake as it never gets eaten. I fancy a good sticky gingerbread cake instead but will need to make that on Christmas week. I am also going to make a few sweets for myself gifts nearer the time.

I am going to get DS (4 yo and special needs) to ponce and make tobleroranges for his nursery workers. He can't actually hold a pen but I know he could manage to post bits of choc orange onto a toblerone! We can then wrap in foil and festoon with Christmas stickers.

I would be more excited about Christmas coming if i were not woefully behind with my poncing!

I've just made a small batch of chilli jam, I'll post a photo once I've labelled the jars with a public safety warning about its fireyness

Voilà!

LaChatte they look so sweet!

They're lovely LaChatte!