Pics with all your children's presents hurt me at Christmas

[pinklady159]

I know its not anyone's fult but i find Christmas so hard and feel like im failing as a mum last year i could only get my son 2 presents so i wrapped up so cardboard boxes so when i took pics it looked like he had more this Christmas is going to be even harder my ex left me in August and ive had a horrible year i don't think i will be able to get my son anything I know hes only going to be 20 months and wont remember but I used to love Christmas and want to make it so special for my little boy :( xx

Mrs D V
I agree that piles of presents doesn't mean loads has been spent. I buy from carboots, pound shop etc. seeing my sons face light up when he sees his pile of tat is worth it, even if it is just cheap stuff that will be broken within a week.

The piles of presents are meaningless really, just extras. You don't need them to have fun.

candypops14 - you're right. It looks like the OPs first post was copy and pasted onto Netmums (because the 'sad' emoji didn't translate into Netmums).

Her second post is also exactly the same on Netmums.

Dodgeville.

Think posting pics of kids with tons of presents is not classy and rather insecure somehow, have no problem with a few holiday snaps or other family events. There can be a benefit to sharing such things, I posted one pic of us on holiday in the UK one summer and had no idea a friend was about to go to the same place, she contacted me and I was able to give her loads of tips for things to do. Also I like seeing what friends are up to generally.

Not sure if the OP is genuine, but would say to anyone with little ones that they enjoy Christmas without being showered with gifts. Indeed for very little ones it can all be a bit much to take in. I never spent that much on DDs as babies as I knew relatives would spoil them.

Hi all - as usual, we do advise all our members to be aware that not everyone on t'internet is who they say they are, and that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

Thanks everyone.

www.netmums.com/coffeehouse/seasonal-chat-arts-crafts-814/christmas-new-year-799/1390225-pictures-your-children-all-their-presents-hurt-me.html

Nice of you to post on both Mumsnet and Netmums. Do you have a PayPal address?

OP said:

" I know its not anyone's fault but i find Christmas so hard and feel like im failing as a mum.."

She is not judging anyone's pile of presents, is she?
(like MrsDV I am a pile person by nature but my budget means its all tat .

She is just saying she feels a bit shit about it.

She's had some good advice to ignore / don't look, and how to make a budget stretch a long way, and that small children are less bothered than their parents usually about the gifts they receive.

Just as 'pile' people don't want judged then 'I find how others DO Christmas' people maybe need a bit of understanding too?

I should declare that, like MrsDV, I am a 'pile' person (for different reasons)
Mrs DV.

My budget means its mostly tat.
I am currently being judged on another thread as belonging to a certain Class of people who 'do conspicuous consumption due to the class they grew up in'

Yeah, you've interpreted it that way haven't you?

So what's the idea, all mnetters and all nmums should send you money? Has it worked? starts composing a sob story Otherwise, posting this on FB might get more responses with offers of actual help because people there know if you are real.

Think posting pics of kids with tons of presents is not classy and rather insecure somehow

Always has to be a "reason" for some people doesnt there, rather than someone just posting a picture of their children and their presents...because they want to! I love my children - as do I assume all posters. I love buying them loads at Christmas. I love taking photos of it all. And now according to some people that makes me insecure

If your last remark was re my post, Leaving then yes, I've interpreted it that way.

Have you interpreted it differently?

Laguna - it is a 'Class' thing, apparently?

I don't get jealous over the Christmas presents photos, I don't think much about them at all apart from I hope they don't get burgled!

I do get a little jealous (sad?) over photos of people round at their extended families, having fun, playing games etc.

Both of our families are not like that at all, we do as much as we can to make it fun for our children but I'm looking forward to them having children and having a house full of family at Christmas time.

Oh right, thanks for telling me that pebble! So Im an insecure AND low class person then! Always did say me and DH would have drowned on the Titanic as we would have been in the steerage!

I'd rather be low class and deemed as insecure, than give a shiny wee shite what some random people on t'interweb think of me.

I only have people I like on Facebook. Therefore I like to see them enjoying themselves, whether that be with 1 present or 1000 presents.

Well I'm common as muck. Must be why my kids actually want stuff to play with.

And as Mrs D V said, I don't think anyone will want my cheap tat

Hiya, been thinking about your thread this morning.

Had a couple of ideas:

If you can save a £1 on your shopping each week, thats 8 stocking fillers.

Love the balloon in a box idea!

Also have you heard of swagbucks? If you have a look at it it's really easy to do, I do it whilst DD naps or for an hour once shes bed or whilst shes occupied. I easily get £15 a week amazon vouchers which I use on my DD's christmas presents! EVen if you did the bar minimum you;d still have £20 of vouchers in time for Christmas. I hope I'm ok to post this, I wouldn't normally.

I know its not about presents and it's so so hard but I thought I'd throw in some ideas on making a little bit of cash to get a few extra presents if you want to.

Who actually has their presents wrapped in October to take pics of? Insane.

Op, if you are real, you've been given great advice here. Start being more imaginative, and remember that your dc won't have a clue about Xmas, or any expectations this year. FFS.

Laguna
Not me that thinks that, but me wot was told that on t'other thread.
(I've never been on 2 threads about same thing before and it is frying my brain!)
I'd be right there in steerage with you, btw!
I grew up in poverty, had a brief bit of time with some money (20 years ago) and am in poverty again atm, and insecure to boot, but I'll not have the 'Class-ist' stuff chucked at me as well

Happy to be COMMON with you, MrsDeV

I was a wooden toy and craft kit / educational book person ALL the way when they were small (I think we DID make sock puppets!).
But now they are getting bigger it's getting harder.
Ds would like a HollowLens or a MacBook this year. Yeah, right
he is 11, and is getting a 2nd hand drum kit I found on Gumtree for £30.
Dd, 8, wants 'our dog to have a puppy'. Yeah, right
She is getting someone's passed down mini-trampoline. And a bracelet kit.
And the satsuma, and the chocolate coins.

Hey social media is terrible for anyone's self esteem. My son is 3 and so far has only had 1 or 2 presents at Xmas and birthdays. X

You know the world doesn't revolve round you. I like seeing people's pics of their kids Christmas presents.

My parents had little money but we had a great Christmas.

'You just have to remember that the real spirit of Christmas actually has nothing to do with presents and material things.'

Too right! There's the roast and booze! Nothing says 'Christmas' like gluttony and drunkenness.

Are you near a Poundshop? You can get lots of bits in therexx

We have 9 children, youngest 3 months, and we don't buy a lot for them at all. Last Christmas the 2 youngest got joint presents as they're very close in age (they were 16m and 2y 3m at the time) Only about 5 in total. We have a small budget and stick to it. It looks like a lot as there are a lot of them to buy for. I put one pic on Facebook last year of the presents but it was only because our puppy had gone to sleep on the living room floor and she was really well camouflaged.. It was a 'spot the dog' type thing.

What annoys me is birthdays and people sharing pictures of piles of presents for that. ours get 1 present each for their birthday, nothing big and showy either. Our 10 year old had a Lego set recently, that was it. He's really into Lego and was thrilled.

As long as he's happy and loved that's all that matters, he doesn't need to grow up thinking he's entitled to everything he wants for Christmas 'just because'.. Our 2 year old has a flashing bouncy ball, not a tiny one, it cost a quid, he loves it. It doesn't need to cost a fortune, just enjoy him, he will be happy :)