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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

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Pics with all your children's presents hurt me at Christmas

160 replies

pinklady159 · 26/10/2015 01:26

I know its not anyone's fult but i find Christmas so hard and feel like im failing as a mum last year i could only get my son 2 presents so i wrapped up so cardboard boxes so when i took pics it looked like he had more this Christmas is going to be even harder my ex left me in August and ive had a horrible year i don't think i will be able to get my son anything I know hes only going to be 20 months and wont remember but I used to love Christmas and want to make it so special for my little boy :( xx

OP posts:
glenthebattleostrich · 26/10/2015 07:21

Also, paper and crayons with a few stickers.

Do you have a charity shop near you, you can pick up books and toys for pennies in our local one.

Ledkr · 26/10/2015 07:22

Nobody that really matters, either posts pictures like that or even buys that much for their dc.

I've been a single parent so I know what it's like to be struggling but I did make good use of the local pound shops and they still had lots to open. I wrapped up everything and just put sweets and bubble bath in the stockings.

Social media is full of sad unhappy people trying to justify their "amazing" lives to anyone who looks at it, I think it's tragic. Don't look at it, spend the time playing with your dc, that will mean more to them than presents.

Ledkr · 26/10/2015 07:24

Op, the Salvation Army do fantastic food parcels and toys for the children. I used to do referrals for the families I work with but I'm not sure what the criteria is. It might be worth you finding out.

Ledkr · 26/10/2015 07:28

Don't know if it's finished but I got some amazingly cheap toys from sainsburys toy sale on Saturday. Lovely car/road mat for 2.49

d270r0 · 26/10/2015 07:34

Check out car boot sales, you might be able to find some nice toys and clothes for super cheap prices. (Less than £1) A few little hot wheels type cars might make his day and I'm sure you could pick those up very cheaply.

MilkyChops · 26/10/2015 07:36

Children don't realise until they're much older that presents are the norm. A 20month old won't have that 'entitled' feeling.

Put your pyjamas on together on Xmas eve and watch Wallace and gromit and eat cookies you baked together. Then leave one for santa with a carrot and milk and go to bed.

In the morning santa may have brought him a few small special things for you to play together. He'll be over the moon.

And.

Fuck everyone else!

It's stupid spending hundreds of pounds on stuff that doesn't get played with or isn't appreciated. It teaches children to be ungrateful and that money grows on trees. I find it hard to believe that people get themselves into debt over Christmas.

toastednutella · 26/10/2015 07:39

Don't feel bad! Kids don't care, why should they.

My kids have a ridiculous amount of presents as we have a very big family, so they are being spoil by cousins, aunts, uncles, grand parents, but the little ones receive mainly clothes, one was given a pack of toothbrushes when he was 2 (he did enjoy cleaning his teeth then). If I was putting a pic on social media, it would probably look a lot worst than it is.

Leavingsosoon · 26/10/2015 07:40

Do it YOUR way.

My children have one present each and a stocking. I don't take pictures of the present(s) but of them :)

TheWoodenSpoonOfMischief · 26/10/2015 07:41

It's such a lovely time of year and there are do many things to enjoy without spending money.
Lots of things people have suggested and also things like seeing the Xmas lights, listening to carol services.
People mostly remember the lovely things they did as a child not how many presents they got.
It's not always about how much you can spend

Mehitabel6 · 26/10/2015 07:45

I agree fieldfare - I can't understand why people want such masses of presents, never mind photograph them. Time is your greatest present. Lots of Christmas magic to be had for free.
Try car boot sales for presents or charity shops.
Love the balloon idea and a 20 month old will like the big box more than a present. My children's best 'toy' ever was a big cardboard tube that came from inside a carpet roll.
It is all about memories- nothing to do with what you buy.

Mehitabel6 · 26/10/2015 07:48

This thread makes me feel quite nostalgic. Lots of great ideas without spending money and you can have a far better time than those who just pour money into it and then have to photograph it to prove it was great!

waitingforcalpoltowork · 26/10/2015 07:52

my friend has 7 (soon to be eight) kids every year she does this with easter eggs (ten plus each child even the unborn one) birthdays (huge amount for each child plus gifts for the younger ones so they won't feel left out) and christmas i dont bother looking now

Amazemedontbeacunt · 26/10/2015 07:54

Maybe all the people posting pictures of piles of gifts understeer tree have wrapped a load of empty boxes too....

Amazemedontbeacunt · 26/10/2015 07:55

*under the not understeer bloody autocorrecting git of a phone

ssd · 26/10/2015 08:01

dont go near fb at Xmas time, its enough to make you put your head in the oven! I hate the show off pics of loads of presents, the one person I know who does this has her mum buying everything anyway cos shes too lazy to work and spends anything she has on herself, yet she pretends she's the perfect mum on xmas day...

and op dont feel so bad, at that age all he wants is a cuddle from his mum and you sound very loving, so he'll get plenty.

Minisoksmakehardwork · 26/10/2015 08:02

Don't worry about what other people do. It is beyond crass to publish all these 'look at flossie's massive pile' photos - I know people who do it for birthdays too. Big pile of pressies, helium balloons and banners draped across 'ready for X in the morning'.

We have 4dc so splurging in that way is never going to be an option. They have small stockings, one gift from their Santa list and one thing from us that they really want. £shops are a great resource for a bumper pack of wax crayons. That and a roll of lining paper, happy child scribbling away. Especially if you draw round them. Look on Pinterest for 'diy' gift ideas. Guaranteed you will have things in the house that you've never thought could be repurposed.

This year in our house has been awful for the 'I want that'. They're watching far too much nick jnr TV with adverts. But at 7, 5, 3 & 3, it is to be expected. We'll just be managing the demands with they can't have everything they want and if they're desperate, they can save for it.

Your son is so much younger so enjoy the lack of demand while you still can. And enjoy a lovely Xmas with the 2 of you. I suspect you're feeling down more than usual because of being alone as well.

Making memories with decorating the tree, paper chains (happy childhood memories for me), spending time not money. Those are things which kids remember. Not who bought the biggest/most presents.

GingerIvy · 26/10/2015 08:08

I see a wide variety of pictures on my FB at Christmas. We have some friends that are determined to keep their Christmas more meaningful and less commercial, and thus they only get a few presents. Some are financially struggling, some are not. There are other friends that go overboard. A few don't celebrate Christmas at all due to their religion.

Don't allow yourself to get caught up in "competitive Christmas-ing." Do what works for you and be happy. You cannot stop others from posting their pictures, and they are not posting to make you feel badly anyway. A 20 month old child is not going to be upset over how many presents are under the tree. I've been in this situation myself. You can spend time being upset over it, or do your best and enjoy the Christmas in other ways. I'm not trying to sound flippant, but it really is what you make of it.

Artandco · 26/10/2015 08:14

That's a crazy amount for one child to have. We have always just done one main gift and a stocking here. Means more money leftover for fun events before Xmas like ice skating/ seeing Santa etc
We could afford thousands, but I think it's daft and completely unnecessary . I can't believe they play with half of those huge piles

GloriaHotcakes · 26/10/2015 08:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

00100001 · 26/10/2015 08:17

he's not even two.... the amount of presents you give, isn't linked to how much you love your child you know. Confused

AllMyBestFriendsAreMetalheads · 26/10/2015 08:19

Balloons in a box sounds awesome, my 19 month old would love that.

Children won't love you more because you buy them more presents. I can't remember half the Christmas presents I got as a child, but I remember loads of things we actually did together at Christmas.

Qwertybynature · 26/10/2015 08:29

Agree with everyone else who said deactivate Facebook. Any child under 5 is probably more interested in the box the toy came in.

Bakeoffcake · 26/10/2015 08:32

A phrase I love is "comparison is the thief of joy"

I think it would be a great idea to have that phrase at the top of every single thread about Christmas.

GirlOverboard · 26/10/2015 08:34

Even if you only had £5 to spend this Xmas, you could buy your son DOZENS of presents from a mixture of car boot sales, charity shops, Freecycle and pound shops. You should stop feeling sorry for yourself and start being a bit more imaginative.

tiredvommachine · 26/10/2015 08:34

Are the answers helping OP?

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