How many presents?

[messystressy]

We normally buy four or so presents for the kids, but keep getting told I am being cruel - that they should have a "pile". I am quite happy to remain as we have done, but just wondering what the status quo is? Might be worth saying that they would get maybe two additional presents from relatives. Am I a Scrooge? We do love Christmas in my house, decorate the house in a complete tacky over-the-top way, see Santa, visit reindeer etc....

I don't have a set amount of presents that dd gets, I buy her stuff she's asked for or I know that she'll like. She gets small stuff from relatives but she's never received a stocking as I buy her pyjamas and stuff she might get in a stocking throughout the year.

Again, everyone is different, but for me the stocking is all about little things that they'd like and that kept them occupied for a bit on Christmas morning to allow DH and I to get showered and dressed and get the lights on etc downstairs before going downstairs for the tree and big presents.

So little puzzles/games/jokes/magic tricks and comics and something to cuddle as well as "Christmas" pants/socks, sweets and toothbrush (one with a character or something rather than the usual bog standard ones). As they get older it's harder to get anything in there that keeps them occupied :) so it tends to be a magazine and edibles including hot chocolate sachets, dvd, memory sticks, key rings etc. It doesn't need to be tat. I rarely buy them anything throughout the year other than maybe a book or magazine for holidays or good reports etc. Birthdays are in the Summer so that works well with the spacing.

Yes if I was only getting four presents I would get four things they want, as it's Christmas! If they want clothes and books then fine, but I wouldn't buy those things just for the sake of sticking to a poem! Mine get clothes when they need them and books all year round.

Oh yes, I do buy clothes all year round - no choice really as they grow so fast - I'm not really into the "half mast" look for school trousers though thankfully they wear shorts outside school pretty much all year round so that helps. I also shop a lot in the sales so they do have "designer" type hoody's etc but I paid half price so it means they are just the same cost as a normal one.

I am struggling to find things for ds1. He is 18, at uni so doesnt want ps4 games as his console is at home and he doesnt have time. I buy him clothes as and when he needs them and I struggle to think of clothes as presents. I want to buy him pressies rather than just give him money.

It's getting more for us the older our son gets. He's 7 now, will be 8 on Boxing Day and we have a baby now who will be 8 months.
The baby will be lucky if he's getting £50 spent on him but he literally doesn't need anything so why would I spend a lot? I buy him toys , clothes etc as and when he needs them.
Older boy has done a list, bearing in mind this is for his birthday as well and it adds up to £300. He'll get everything on it. I've probably spent £100 on other bits for him throughout the year when I see things he would like. He's such a pleasure to buy for.
We probably have around 20 relatives who buy for them too.

We were really skint when older son was born and we have enough now to spoil him so don't see why we shouldn't.

My DC (6 and 8) get one 'Big' present, in previous years this has been things like a big Lego set, bike, climbing frame. This year they're getting a laptop as a joint present, as it's more money than we'd usually spend the rest of the presents will be cheaper but there will still be a reasonable pile under the tree. Each child usually gets:

A board game
A craft or art set (Qixels this year)
Branded clothing that we wouldn't normally buy (eg Minecraft hoodie)
A book set (£5 from The Book People)
A small Lego set
A DVD (or box set if cheap on Amazon!)
A selection box
Often an Xbox game but not this year as they'll have the laptop

Plus a stocking with chocolate, an annual, Coco Pops, pens, notepads and one or two small bits of tat that Santa sneaks past Mum

So that's a decent pile with plenty to open, but not a ton of plastic crap, and not an overwhelming amount of new stuff. They both have spring birthdays and don't get bought stuff through the year (apart from clothes if they need them but then it's the cheap supermarket stuff). They don't get much from extended family either, just a small gift from the GPs.

I've always done a pile for my now 12 year old. She has the biggest bedroom of the house, full of crap and I have a loft full of unappreciated toys and games.

I now have another daughter who is just 9 months. This year it's all going to change. One main present and a stocking for them both, family presents under the tree. I want the baby to grow up appreciating things.

Im pleased to see only one shared present. Dsis always got in first, twisted DM round her pinky and declared we are sharing x again this year. No say from me or younger sis ..
I hated it. And she never shared.

You should seriously make sure it is shared equally and they both really want it before going ahead.

We've done some shared things in the past such as games consoles but it's easier with 2 who have very similar interests and we always made sure they had a controller each and games they would both like - some shared and some individual so that they could play together or alone.

mine get loads. And it still comes in under budget. But thats thanks to bargain hunting _

and these threads always bring out the 'i prefer to give my child a goat for Christmas but it isn't actually for them its for a family who need it'

Festive Goats.

My boys are quite capable of sharing thank you for your concern!

My mum bought me a goat for a village in the third world somewhere once as an adult though!

Jw35 was it festive?

I bought Ex MIL a camel once. I loathed her. It was wonderful

Sally we occasionally do a shared present but only if we know it's something both really want. They are both boys, 17 months apart and have very similar interests. It's not something one will ask for but the other has no interest in.

This year they are getting Lego dimensions for the ps4. Something they will both love and can share (but haven't asked for outright as they know it's expensive , they're gonna be stoked)

Some years we haven't done shared presents as there wasn't anything that both would have liked at the same time.

As for the want/need/wear/read poem sucking the joy out of things......

Want: Lego set
Need: New rash vest & summer hat with their favourite characters on, I refuse to buy character related clothing the rest of the year so a) this is a big treat for them and they love it and b) it's summer here at Christmas, they can't wait to go to the beach to wear them Christmas afternoon
Wear New dress up costume, Hulk or Captain America, Doctor or Fire Fighter
Read Thomas the tank engine 68 book box set or Lego Character encyclopaedia

My boys were thrilled with their gifts that year and I'm pretty sure following a poem didn't suck the joy out of Christmas.

When me and my brother were kids the sole purpose of the stocking was to keep us in our rooms until a reasonable hour of the morning!

It was my favourite part of the day, waking up at 4.30 ish to see my stocking at the end of the bed, then waking my brother up and opening them together in my room.

They usually contained a few little quiet games like top trumps or jacks, a book, puzzles...we would play with them until 7ish, then go wake my parents up.

I'm reducing the 'pile' this year.

The idea makes me very twitchy, but I am sick to death of drowning in stuff. I haven't set a budget, instead I have written a precise list and intend to stick to it.