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Christmas

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Original poster

I'm not getting the kids a Christmas present

113 replies

IsleOfRight · 04/11/2013 08:18

Well, not strictly true. I am going to get them stockings. These have things like an annual, maracas, a puzzle, choc coins etc. But not a big present from us as both sets of grandparents getting them a big item each and both have a birthday withing ten days of Christmas (one before, one after). Does this seem reasonable?

OP posts:
StitchingMoss · 04/11/2013 08:19

Totally. Most kids get far too much for Christmas IMO! Grin

NorthernLurker · 04/11/2013 08:20

How old are they? Mine are 15, 12 and 6 and would be upset not to get a present from us - although our big present isn't especially big by the standards I've seen on here - usually around £50-60.

NorthernLurker · 04/11/2013 08:21

Stockings come from FC in our house so it would be like getting them nothing you see.

wakemeupnow · 04/11/2013 08:21

Why not go overboard OP and chuck in a satsuma !

BoohPear · 04/11/2013 08:21

No. It's not their faults when their birthdays are. I would be gutted if I only got a stocking.

LoreleisSecret · 04/11/2013 08:22

Why? What point are you trying to prove?

Isildur · 04/11/2013 08:23

If it works for your family, it's reasonable.

It's not as though anyone in real life is going to show upon your doorstep and berate you for the entire Christmas period about not doing it their way, is it?

When I was small, our parents didn't give us a gift 'from them', but we had one present each from Father Christmas; then when we were older, one present from them.

We didn't have stockings. No one is in therapy. Grin

CrotchStitch · 04/11/2013 08:26

Not convinced really and I am against blatant overspending on kids just for the sake of it. How old are your DCs and will they receive gifts from lots of family besides their GP's?
Also do you intend to put the money you have saved into their savings, take them out for some treat days etc?

gamerchick · 04/11/2013 08:27

No don't bother with the satsuma.. you'll totally spoil them then Hmm

If they're very young then fair dos.. but I would have been crushed just to get a stocking and I didn't get very much for Christmas as a kid anyway. Unwrapping is the best part.

Still they're your kids.

wonderingsoul · 04/11/2013 08:29

i d ont think its fair, its not ther fault they where born close to christmas...

i think you have to ask your self if you would buy them a birthday present if they where born in march or april.

i get that its hard mine have birthdays nove and december, but they still get two sets of presents

Sammie101 · 04/11/2013 08:35

I was born on Boxing Day and still got a fairly good amount for Christmas. As a child I would have been a bit upset with only a stocking tbh. From 13 when my mum left I didn't get half as many presents but I was at an age where I could understand that presents actually cost a lot of money, that we didn't have. But still just a stocking at that age? I would have felt a little upset.

HenriettaBrain · 04/11/2013 08:40

I think it depends on the age of the children

DropYourSword · 04/11/2013 08:43

I always thought the stockingI was the best bit! made my mum promise fin a very young age that there'd always be a stocking, even if there was nothing else!

FunkyBoldRibena · 04/11/2013 08:45

I don't celebrate christmad but WTF???

milk · 04/11/2013 08:47

YANBU :)

Mckayz · 04/11/2013 08:48

I think it is cruel. DS2 has his birthday 2 weeks before and he will still be getting Xmas presents.

nancy75 · 04/11/2013 08:51

Does it seem reasonable? - No it seems mean.

ICameOnTheJitney · 04/11/2013 08:52

I often read about this kind of thing on Mumsnet but didn't really think people did it,....then last year I overheard a child of about 9 talking to his friend in the school yard...the 9 year old was saying "I only get one present" and his friend...a girl...said "Oh...but I suppose it's a big one!!" and he said "No." and looked very uncomfortable.

I think it sets them apart and they see their friends having a pile to open and feel sad....mine don't have expensive things and we don't really buy toys all year...so they get about 20 gifts each...some things were under a fiver...it's not a lot.

monkeymax58 · 04/11/2013 08:53

I don't celebrate Xmas either but think it is a bit unfair.

Aeroaddict · 04/11/2013 08:54

I think it is a little unfair not to get them a main present for Christmas. My best friend at school had a birthday around Christmas, and I know she used to hate the joint Christmas and birthday presents she always got. The main present from you doesn't need to be expensive, but it seems mean not to give them something to unwrap.

Clutterbugsmum · 04/11/2013 08:56

DD1 birthday is a month after christmas and she gets as much spent on her as the other do whose birthday's are in March and September.

aintnothinbutagstring · 04/11/2013 08:56

If both sets of GPs are providing lots on christmas day, I don't see the problem, they wont be lacking will they? I have a christmas birthday but my extended family didn't give us big presents only small token ones so my parents provided enough presents for both days. Or you could buy them clothes if they are old enough to notice the 'hardship' and that won't add to the tat.

BrianTheMole · 04/11/2013 08:57

I think its mean. One of my dc has a birthday close to christmas, I'd never do that to him. Its bad enough when family try to get away with that, but his parents? Just no!

aintnothinbutagstring · 04/11/2013 09:00

From your stocking ideas it sounds like they are young so YADNBU, context in this case is everything, older kids are more materialistic and theres more peer pressure.

Isildur · 04/11/2013 09:00

Some people just do not have spare money though.

The OP might be doing this out of choice, but for lots of families, buying gifts for the children, even one each, would mean putting it on credit, which they may not have access to anyway.

The threads on here from people living in absolute poverty are not figments of the imagination, and telling parents they are 'mean' and that their children will be set apart if they only get a book and some sweets is just horrid and unnecessary.

The things mentioned in the OP will be a lot more than many children get this year. It isn't cruel, and there are probably loads of kids who'd rather £5 was spent on dinner for the whole family, that plastic toys just for them.