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Christmas

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Original poster

I'm not getting the kids a Christmas present

113 replies

IsleOfRight · 04/11/2013 08:18

Well, not strictly true. I am going to get them stockings. These have things like an annual, maracas, a puzzle, choc coins etc. But not a big present from us as both sets of grandparents getting them a big item each and both have a birthday withing ten days of Christmas (one before, one after). Does this seem reasonable?

OP posts:
SteamWisher · 04/11/2013 09:04

If their birthdays weren't near Xmas would you get them a Christmas present?

Tiggles · 04/11/2013 09:05

I guess it depends on age and if they believe in Father Christmas.
If they get (or make) you a present for your birthday and Christmas then if they believe their stocking is from FC, then would they be disappointed that you didn't reciprocate a gift? Equally if they know the stocking is from you then I don't see a problem at all.
But if you are really not getting them a present just because their birthday is close to Christmas then I think that nobody in the family should get anything for Christmas and just for their birthday or it seems very unfair!

aintnothinbutagstring · 04/11/2013 09:07

That is true isildur, not only that but I live in a small flat and there's no way I would buy my children 20 presents each even if I could afford to as the place would be overrun by plastic tat or lots of little bits I have to keep track of and I don't think its healthy anyway to teach your children that Christmas is all about over-consumption.

wonderingsoul · 04/11/2013 09:08

isildur.. but thats not what the op is saying

its becasue its so close to christmas, the presents dont even have to be big. they could be a £1 colouring book.. so long as the child has something from them.

shes asking if she can get away with itBECASUE its so close to christmass. which is a horrid way to think.

ill admit i would prob spend more on my kids birthdays if they where not so close to christmas, but they still get things they enjoy and still get made a fuss off.

wonderingsoul · 04/11/2013 09:09

or even a day out,.. no presents but a day out some where.

thanksamillion · 04/11/2013 09:13

If it's because you think that they get too much 'stuff' could you do something else instead? I'm thinking along the lines of a special trip out, a subscription to something etc.

My parents are very good at recognising that as the DCs have birthdays close(ish) to Christmas and we live in a small house 'stuff' isn't always the best option. It also means that the DCs get things that last a bit longer, or great memories.

aintnothinbutagstring · 04/11/2013 09:15

they could be a £1 colouring book

They are doing a stocking which presumably will cost more than £1, so big presents off GP's and a nice stocking off mum and dad is not enough for children these days? When my parents were kids of the 60's they only got a bloody stocking and that was that. Especially if they are young they won't know any different anyway.

Xfirefly · 04/11/2013 09:17

I'm one of them people with a bday very close to Xmas. I actually hate it. family would always try to get away with giving me one present...which would be my Xmas gift too...my mum would be so pissed off because she would buy Xmas and bday presents separately. it wound me up when my bday was associated with Xmas.

please don't do the same to your children. would they have more presents if they were born later in the year?

at the end of the day it's up to you what you get buy don't not buy them a bigger present because someone else is..or because of their bdays.

MARGUERITE18 · 04/11/2013 09:17

I would buy them pressies - if its because of money then hit the bargain threads, the works and poundland

if its too many gifts then get cinema vouchers, show tickets, theme park tickets or character clothes and bedding

Sirzy · 04/11/2013 09:17

Why not get something like the 2 for £20 toys from asda and give them one each - at least then they have some form of present from you.

I don't agree with the idea of not giving them anything just because of when their birthday is. My birthday is close to Christmas and my parents were always careful to make sure that my birthday and Christmas weren't merged into one

Original poster
IsleOfRight · 04/11/2013 09:18

Should have said, they are 3 and 1. So wouldn't notice if they didn't get anything at all.

OP posts:
wonderingsoul · 04/11/2013 09:19

if its due to money then of course.

but the op hasnt said that.. and of course the kids will know and feel sad that they didnt get some thing thoughfull of mum becasue they dared to be born so close to christmas. maybe not when they are young but they will when their older.

FreakoidOrganisoid · 04/11/2013 09:20

Ds' birthday is ten days before Christmas. He still gets separate presents. They don't have to be big or expensive, just something to open. Although saying that my dc do have to choose between present and party for their birthdays so last year he didn't have a birthday present from us to open-also considered mean by many!

moldingsunbeams · 04/11/2013 09:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gamerchick · 04/11/2013 09:27

If they are that young then it's probably fine. As I said it would depend on their ages. 3 and 1 wouldn't notice.

aintnothinbutagstring · 04/11/2013 09:27

So they won't even remember will they? And if they have so much, they won't play with it anyway, do you really want your house to be taken over by items from Poundland because MN told you to?

My best friend is very restrained when it comes to xmas and her dd, she will often club up with her mum or dad to buy her daughter a bigger present rather than lots of small tat presents so her dd will not have a massive pile to open at xmas but one big good quality present. Sometimes reading the Christmas thread on MN can skew your view of other peoples Christmas's, don't think every child has 20+ presents to open on xmas day. And I do believe strongly in quality over quantity, if I only had £20 I'd rather spend it on one present that will last than 20 presents from poundland.

hallowisitmeyourelookingfor · 04/11/2013 09:30

At those ages, then I think it's reasonable (I wouldn't do it myself, mainly because I love buying them stuff and also because we are financially in a position to spoil them). They won't know and will just be pleased to have presents.
But for future years, no. As pps have pointed out, they shouldn't be punished for when their birthdays are.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 04/11/2013 09:37

As children we always had our one and only main present in our "stocking", well pillow-case. We were always more than happy with that!

  • There are lots of different ways to do Christmas - I'm thinking of going for a minimalist approach this year as broke and can't face the hassle, also feeling it's got too commercial and want some simplicity
BobaFetaCheese · 04/11/2013 09:37

I would do it, esp with their ages.
Ds1 will turn 2 just before Christmas, he's not getting anything from us for Christmas as he'll still be bloody opening birthday stuff, if he notices christmas next year he'll get stuff from us.
Ds2 will be 4 months so he'll get nothing for Christmas from us.

WaitMonkey · 04/11/2013 09:40

Honestly, I love buying Christmas presents for my children. It gives me great pleasure to find something they would like, wrap it and see them opening it on Christmas morning and it would really upset me, not to do this. Your dc are young and obviously won't notice. But as it seems the only reason your doing this is because they have birthdays close to Christmas, I would be interested to know if this is something you plan doing every year ?

GwendolineMaryLacey · 04/11/2013 09:40

My dds will be 6 and 2 a fortnight after Christmas. So yes they get lots of things all in one hit and the house looks more like a branch of Toys R Us than it does usually, but they get bugger all the rest of the year. I wouldn't penalise them just because their birthdays are soon after, it's not their fault. January birthdays are shitty enough anyway.

LoreleisSecret · 04/11/2013 09:40

Buy the kids a present Op.
You know it's mean otherwise you wouldn't have posted.
Yes they may not realise but, why would you not want to treat your children ONE day of the year.

Grinch.

wakemeupnow · 04/11/2013 09:41

If they are 3 and 1 then forget the satsuma.. make the most of keeping it minimal whilst you can Grin

OneStepCloser · 04/11/2013 09:41

ds will be 5 two days after christmas, it does seem like overload but he gets presents for both, its not his fault that he was born at christmas. I agree they are both young so wouldnt notice, so I presume its just while they are both so young? You wont get away with it when they are older Grin

Meglet · 04/11/2013 09:43

yanbu. If they're 3 and 1 then keep everything to a minimum.

We were inundated with big presents from relatives at that age. I used to buy a few small bits from the NCT sale.