I'm not getting the kids a Christmas present

[IsleOfRight]

Well, not strictly true. I am going to get them stockings. These have things like an annual, maracas, a puzzle, choc coins etc. But not a big present from us as both sets of grandparents getting them a big item each and both have a birthday withing ten days of Christmas (one before, one after). Does this seem reasonable?

Her birthday present has very often been either craft materials or new clothes that would be needed for late winter or spring.

Yes, you are being unreasonable and tight!
It's not their fault their birthdays are so close to Christmas.

Meanie

Meh.

Ds was 3 and 3 weeks at Xmas last year. He got a stocking and a Mickey Mouse soft toy. Ds2 was six months. He got a shapesorter. Their eyes lit up. There was loads of uunwrapping.

This year they are getting way more. A pirate water table from Little Tikes, Octonauts stuff, Smurfs stuff, a train set, cars, books etc. Probably double the budget but this year I know what they want because they both have fairly clearly defined interests. The little one is obsessed with soft toys and loves each one on sight, also loves trains. Last year it just wasn't necessary...

Enjoyworking Enjoy!
All sounds delightful

I don't believe Christmas is about the presents, certainly not about how many you get.

I got a lot of presents growing up but the spirit of Christmas wasn't there. I may have had whatever toy I'd pleaded for but I never had any feeling of joy or warmth or festive spirit. So now I don't really have any fond memories of Christmas as a result and all those presents are on a landfill somewhere.

As long as kids get something that will make them happy that's all that matters. It's much more about having a happy time with your loved ones and creating life long memories imo.

If you are genuinely really struggling financially then yes it's reasonable. If not then no I think it's very mean tbh.

Dd1 has her birthday around Christmas time. She's asked a few times to not have any birthday gifts from us in order to get a bigger main present for christmas (Santa brings the small gifts, mum and dad buy the big presents)

However we still always get her a 'main' birthday present, as in something she really wants, but doesn't cost the earth eg. Minecraft subscription this year.

It's really not MEAN

They are tiny children, not much more than babies, who will be thrilled with stockings, and are getting big presents from grandparents. When my eldest was two and a half he had a stocking, and we had other gifts for him under the tree. It took him ALL DAY to open the contents of the stocking, which just had little bits and pieces in it, but he wanted to play with everything. We scooped up all but one of the bigger gifts and saved them for other days/regifting/his third birthday. The others have been the same until 5 or so when they had got particular ideas about what they would like to get.

OP, it sounds great.

Each to their own, I suppose !

I don't remember any Christmas before about six!