Fellatio's Poncetastic Christmas Thread 2011 is.....

[FellatioNelson]

open for business. Knock yerselves out.

I still don't know what sand dollars are, are they naturally occurring Yank?

aStarInSrangeways, why not have a chocolate log or roulade instead of fruit cake or pudding? Although I'm wondering if Soreen could be manufactured into a cake somehow!

Hurrah!

Christmas has begun!

Off to order that wreath and consider Chrostmas cake.

Ladies - I have hit the heights of ponstasticity - I made me first christmas cakes last week I also have 4 lots of fruit that have been slowly drinking brandy or ammaretto since January for 2 puds and 2 more cakes :) New jars for chutney and bramble jelly arrived this morning and the bottles for sweet chilli sauce and various flavoured vodkas.

Yes Liketo. Technically they're skeletons, which is a bit weird I suppose! Here People use them with seashells, etc.

That sounds nice Fellatio . Good idea!

I have already made blackberry vodka, cherry brandy, and lemon/orange vodka for my assorted alcoholic family, and am halfway through a quilt for my niece. Do I get smuggery points, O great ones?

cheerful, sand dollars are what we call sea urchins. They fossilize differently in different parts of the world.

I have star anise heads and I have made pickled plums in pepper and cinnamon and star anise, and they will be wrapped with ribbon and tied with a little star anise had as a tag. I feel waaay poncey but simultaneously outclassed by you lot.

I deserve a bosom?! My thirteen-year-old self is flattered.

I love blinis - they are really easy to make anyway. You can buy buckwheat flour in tesco and waitrose, and you just make batter with a pinch of bicarb and do them like normal american-style thick pancakes. We have them with salmon and red caviar at Christmas because DH can't have meat just then.

I'm really hungry for those parmesan bites - recipe?

RockStock this is me

4 oz Plain Flour
4 oz freshly-grated Parmesan
4 oz Butter
1 medium Egg
Few drops of very cold water

I also sometimes put some thyme or oregano in as well.

Mix the flour, butter and Parmesan in a food processor and process quickly to blend.

Add the egg and whiz again. It should all come together in a ball, but may need a touch of iced water.

Wrap it in clingfilm and chill it for at least an hour in the fridge before using.

Roll out on a well floured surface to about 3-4mm cut out in mini biscuit rounds and cook in a 190 oven for about 8-10 minutes - just keep an eye on them really. Top with whatever. JUst thought of another nice topping - spinich, steamed then mixed in with boursin and a good grating of nutmeg. Very Yum.

Ooh Fellatio great idea! I shall be using that. Perhaps in a large round glass bowl with mini battery operated lights and greenery added to the cranberries.

rock they all sound amazing!

Can anyone give me either some nibble ideas or a smoked salmon starter for 2. DP and I are having a very romantic Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve this year. Any ideas? I'm thinking champagne with something in it. Nibbles or a starter then full Christmas dinner with a vintage red then Christmas pudding with all the trimmings.

aStar - excellent! They're are all really easy nibbles to do - and from the bits I've put down already, you can have about 20 different combinations from this lot alone really. The pastry can be made a week in advance to be kept in the fridge and just cooked as needed, but it also freezes well.

It is all easy, but impressive stuff that tastes delicious but takes no real time to make.

Prolific - I've got loads more, and some great smoked salmon ones too, so will post a load later as ought to get dressed and do stuff first (it's already 11am for me!)

OK, own up. Who bought all the garlands from Bloom. Hmmm, HMMMMM.

Out of stock. Buggers.

GiganticusBottomus can you share the timings for fan ovens and Delia's cake please? I don't want mine to be all dry and I have a habit of overcooking things to make sure they are done.

TIA

i go away for the weekend and this appears, fantastic! we are always away at families house over christmas so there is a limit to the poncetasticness of my christmas but i do try! the decorations always go up the first weekend in december, when we also spend the day at the Bath christmas market.

tinsel will be banned in the reception rooms but will be allowed in the kids rooms which they can decorate themselves!

my mil loves red onion chutney so i was thinking of making some for the first time ever. anyone got a good recipe? we have a slow cooker and i was wondering if i could make it in that? never made anything like that before but love the idea. can i reuse pasta jars and things like that or do i have to go out and buy 'proper' jars?

TheSkiingGardener - I do the in my fan oven at 130 with a cartouche on for the first 3 hours, then an further hour or so with cartouche removed. Seems to do the trick, never dry. I also feed it regularly and it is always deliciously moist. (that's for a 9" round one, for a 6" I would do 3 hours, taking cartouche off for last 40 minutes, 7/8" ones 3½ hours, cartouche off for last 45.)

And, I didn't buy them all, honest.

Thanks Rock that would be great :) Want to go all out for this meal
11am with you...oh dear it's nearly 10:30 and I'm just eating breakfast...it's safe too now the dc are napping!

Thank you Rock.

Amateur question here, I have just looked up cartouche and I'm still not sure what it is . Is it a greaseproof paper cake hat?

I thought it was a circle of greaseproof which is slightly bigger than cake which you then wet under the tap and pop on cake.
I also make long double folded strips of grease proof for the outside edges of cake tin tied on with string.

I use Keith Floyd's recipe and that is included in the instructions.
Hope that kind of helps!

So yes a cake hat!

Yes it does, thank you. Didn't know about wetting it too.

So, a wet cake hat.

Can't believe all the bloom garlands have gone!

Right my blank wreath arrived this morning (just a willow weaved plain one) and tonight I'm going to attempt to make this

pinterest.com/pin/95720253/

or maybe this

pinterest.com/pin/213389857/

Oh decisions, decisions.

I'm also definitely making blinis, possibly for Christmas Eve - I think I'm going to go for poncey buffet and champagne cocktails Christmas Eve