Fellatio's Poncetastic Christmas Thread 2011 is.....

[FellatioNelson]

open for business. Knock yerselves out.

It's £15 on Amazon!!

The Christmas Magazine is out now, and also Good Housekeeping's Christmas recipes special edition.

I've just been in Dunelm Mill, and they have their Christmas things in. Spotted some woven willow hearts on a ribbon approx 20x20cms, painted white, the ribbon is naff but thought they would suit those having a rustic or Scandi theme, only £1.99 each. Great potential to ponce up and make fab. Also have children's Christmas fleece throws at £4.99, 120x150cms. Not poncy in themselves but there is a cute gingerbread man one.

Blathers the book here lands on the table at brekky on last day of school, not that I try and extend the season by any means necessary oh no

Ooh - Taffeta - could you share your granola recipe? I've been toying with the idea of making a big batch and putting some in a fancy jar for my DSis's gift.

All your plants and flowers sound lovely! We've moved to a new house with a garden this year, but haven't done too much with it yet. I'd honestly not thought of using it for growing my own floral displays and Christmas decorations. I'll sharpen up my gardening skills in 2012 and be ready for some serious poncing in that direction next year.

bestponceyribbonforhomemadejars

I hyperventilated over the red snowflakes (a la Nigella) last year, but didn't get it....I'm having it this year though, dang the expense.

£2.29 a metre? really?

[cheapskate]

10p/metre

I know it's nowhere near as nice, but still....

It's cheap compared to last year...by the time I discovered it it was £26 a roll. Feck knows how many metres, but I couldn't justify it.

Am currently busy selling all my child's toys this year to pay for it.

I also love the East of India/Gisela Graham ribbons but they are sometimes a bit papery. I got some ribbon with gold lettering on last year and my Mum said it made her think of funeral wreaths. Hmm.

Taffeta- were you TaffetaCat? Who made me spend unspeakable amounts of money on wrapping paper?

how about this?

incidentally, to return to the mini christmas cakes, I am very tempted by the 12 days of Christmas option, especially as teachers won't compare notes so I could leave out the hardest ones

I had something similar to that, and East of India I think. Buggery, that'sanother website to add to my list.

Going back to the flavoured salt...if I make it now, will it go damp? Or does it being in a kilner type jar stop that?

Bucharest - you just reminded me. Whoever was looking for Kilner jars, Hobbycraft have lots, and prices looked very reasonable to me too when I was spending much too much money on bits for DD's birthday cake last night..

Blimey, the personalised stuff only cost £2 for 2m worth postage and I only got that for my nephews coz I rarely see them!

Kilner jar should stop damp.

You an get East of India stuff on ebay, I got a pack of labels for 99p. With teh ribbon that's actually most extended family gifts covered (parents and Grandad always demand request cash so no wrapping there)

oh how beautiful is this? I need it.

Blimey they saw you lor coming didn't they LMAO?

(compare jute bags on ebay with that website- equal ponce value, massive £ difference)- I get Bucharest as it's international postage but.....

on which site, Peachy? Midpac? I have to say I haven't looked at bags, but last time I shopped around for paper and (very specific) ribbon they were better than ebay.

(note I am not one of those paying £2 a flipping metre for ribbon, though )

99p/metre on ebay
32p/metre

I don't know quite how it happened but unseen poncetastic forces made me order that Sarah Raven book .
Today the postman delivered me Paula Pryke 's wreaths and garlands , full of beautiful things to make , not just for Christmas , but many different occasions ( from Amazon , used book so not expensive )

In the card/wrapping section of John Lewis yesterday I got 6x2m of 2inch wide very shiny gold ribbon @50p each (down from £2 each) so if anyone is doing a red/gold theme hotfoot it to John Lewis.

Midpac, jute ones.

I would decry the person making huge profit on ebay but DH might be annoyed, what with his ebay store and all

Although I think I might be missing a trick here: DH sells stage lighting, if only I could get him on board imagine the Christmas decs we could have... no chance though!

Just bought large candy canes from Tesco, pressie wrapping for nephews sorted. More usefully so are the actual presents needed to go inside (Bop It, teh ball ones, £10 in entertainer down from £20- result, I ended up buying 5, friend's DD, ds2, friend's ds, 2 nephews)- anyone worked out how I am financing the ponciness LMAO. Also ordered stuff for first 3 cakes and fig jam, but performing tomorrow so will have to ignore for a few days now (one day to perform, 2 to complain that I am too old)

If anyone is interested have just bought a few reduced Christmas stamps on here: Christmas rubber stamps some are naff some are not!

Taffeta/TaffetaCat here

Granola recipe:

About 1/3rd of a bag of Sainsbo's TTD porridge oats
A few handfuls each your choice of seeds and nuts, I use:

• pumpkin seeds
• sunflower seeds
• desiccated coconut
• chopped roasted hazelnuts
• roughly chopped pecans
• flaked almonds
• macadamias, chopped if Christmas

Zest of an orange Teaspoon of vanilla extract Pinch of salt

Mix this lot up a bit.

In a large roasting tray lined with baking parchment, put approx 50g butter, 2 tbspns golden syrup and 2 tbspns demerara sugar ( you can use 1 tbspn each golden syrup and honey but I haaaaaaaaaaaaaaate honey ).

Set oven at 150 C and shove tin in for 10 mins for butter to melt. Swirl it all round to mix. Add oaty mix and swirl round so all oaty stuff coated. Bake on middle shelf for around 25 mins until all golden, stirring round every 10 mins to ensure it all gets cooked evenly.

Once cold break it up if necessary and add dried fruits of choice. I usually add sultanas and at Christmas cranberries. You can also add shards of dark choc at this point but only do it once its completely cold otherwise, well you can guess what happens.....

Apparently the poncey Heston Blumenthal Christmas puddings are already in some Waitrose's. I asked in ours yesterday and they won't be out until the 17th.

I'm going to make my own puddings but might have to see if I can get one just to try it.

In my Waitrose weekend thing it said thy would be out by now, but not in my local one either. Not sure about getting one though. I have two Christmas Puds that have been maturing from a couple of years ago. Not sure I need another, and not sure if the Heston one is going to be so last years thing.

Have made my Christmas Cake though. Brandy bottle is looking distinctly emptier

Ours is quite a small store so I think they've been holding off as they don't have the room. When I asked, they said they were in the warehouse but not in the store until the 17th

Ours isn't a small store but let's jut say that due to it's catchment area it doesn't carry any premium goods!

Need to go to the one in the posh market town for that.