My New Life

[JustCosy]

I have no idea how this transformation happened. I am in my 40's and have spent my life as an Atheist with tendencies and inquisitiveness around the New Age and witchcraft. I am from a family that was heavily into Satanic practices and witchcraft. I now realise and understand that my life has revolved around a generational curse, that is going to END with me.

I don't even know how my beliefs began to change, but for the last 6 weeks, I have immersed myself in everything Jesus/The Bible/The enemy/The word etc. This almost felt involuntary. And I feel like I have never seen myself or the world in such a clear and logical way.

I now consider myself a Christian and know that this is not something I will ever deviate from for the rest of my life. I'm rather lost in all this - I feel that I need to be baptised, delivered and to find my place.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has gone through this kind of shift with no prompting? My life was fine, I wasn't seeking anything more. I am happily married and was excited for my future.

And yet here I am, unable to like, watch, buy or listen to the things I used to. Completely unable to live my life as I had before. It almost feels like I have spent the last 40 years, blind.

Sorry if this makes no sense, I'm on this journey alone and whilst it isn't lonely, I'm just wondering if this has happened to anyone else lately?

My own experience of Jesus is much more lifelong and gentle, so not like yours! It sounds like a Damascence conversion, and more power to your elbow! Have you found a local church/ Alpha course ( or similar) / home group to help you?

I went from being a weak Christian to suddenly being on quite an intense spiritual journey. I am looking into a Catholic baptism but I wish there weren’t so many hoops to jump through. I wish my parents had had me baptised to be honest.

I have been reading my bible a lot and I am surprised about how interested I am. Normally it would have sent me to sleep, but now that I feel I have a personal connection to Jesus, reading the Bible seems extremely relevant and not just like a history book, which it did before.
i think there’s a lot of people getting a wake up call from God right now, I think there are many people like us who are coming to faith later in life.

I live in a small village with a church 30 seconds away, but not sure how to approach it. Everytime I go in there, nobody is there. I have a lot of churches around me, so maybe I'll start trying them all? :)

It's quite shocking to me, how suddenly it feels like my eyes have been opened and everything makes sense. I've started my bible now, but I was rather intimidated at first, a bible reading plan has helped. I'm still on the Gospels though. Still trying to overcome 'mum brain' and get back into reading in depth now that my little one is at school :)

If you feel like adding Catholic churches into your explorations, you will find the scripture readings for every Sunday (and weekday) here www.agapebiblestudy.com/ with notes to help you prepare and understand the context of what you're hearing.

I hope your new life continues to be enriching and supporting.

I was also intimidated by the bible at first, and i mainly stick to the bits specifically about what Jesus got up to, because i find joy in that.
I find some of the history very complex and I wish I had a religious background to fall back on because it feels like I’m starting from scratch. When I do get to church (because I don’t drive) I go to the week day afternoon sessions because I feel less self conscious and the shorter sessions are less overwhelming for me. I don’t know any of the songs and i never know when to stand up or sit down. Also I’m not a fast learner :-(

@DeanElderberry
thanks for the bible study link, it will be helpful to broaden my knowledge without getting bamboozled

@Happyinarcon I honestly don't think you should worry about the sitting and standing bit and if you're getting it right. I feel quite certain Jesus isn't bothered!

It is enough that you are there.

I'm a long term Christian and I learn every day.

..becoming a Catholic is taken seriously, and there are RCIA courses for adults. You can still continue to grow your relationship with God, pray and go to mass, read your Bible etc etc but RCIA is about ensuring you fully understand the faith that you are commiting to and being Baptised into. In some Christian denominations, the sacrememts are only seen as symbols ... this is not the case for Catholics.
There are some great resources online too.
Called To More on YouTube is excellent as are Fr Mike Schmitz, Fr Casey Cole, Bishop Robert Barron and many more.

Even a small village church will have a website with details of the services and vicar. You could go along.
Personally I prefer a larger, modern CofE church.
I think you might be wise to try a few different churches and see which one feels like home for you - some are more welcoming than others, some are more liberal than others.
There is a massive variety amongst Christians and that’s fine, it’s okay to have different view and options on things within the faith.
Alpha is a good place to start, although when I went to an alpha course I didn’t feel ready to pray and I felt like a bit of a lemon as everyone else did! To be fair no one else seemed bothered that I didn’t pray, there was no comment. It was quite a few years before I ever went up to take communion too and again it wasn’t a problem, no one ever said anything.
Welcome to the faith, it gives me great comfort and strength.

I can strongly recommend the She Reads Truth resources for Bible study. They are stunning books with space for responding/journalling/taking notes. You can do the daily reading on the app for about £2-£3 per study (each study lasts anything from 2-8 weeks) or for free on the website. The books aren’t cheap, but I love them and have been a monthly subscriber for about 6/7 years now. DH also subscribes to He Reads Truth to get his books too. They are an American company but now have a U.K. base to ship within Europe. I think they are worth every penny and the cost is equivalent to about a fiver a week, so if that is affordable for you (I know it isn’t for everyone) then I do recommend them. I love having a guided study and all the extra resources in the books are so helpful - they give a ton of background info which helps if you’re unfamiliar with the context. As a monthly subscriber you also get the app downloads for free and I use it alongside the books as they have writers who write a little prompt or response each day and that’s often helpful to see someone else’s perspective, or if you’re not sure what to think about a passage.

I freely admit to being a bit of a Bible nerd - love delving deep in, have a theology degree and preach regularly in my church - but still love (and need) the guidance of a regularly scheduled study.

I came back to faith suddenly and with gusto despite not wanting to. Its like God dragged me unwillingly back to faith. Its been about 5 years and I'm much more settled. I initially felt very sad I'd missed out on 25 years worth of worship. I'm very happy with my church community. It's been good for my marriage and my family, especially my children.

Bring a Christian is so challenging it's hard to really do as Jesus would have done but every little bit helps.

Try a Catholic Church. It might not be your cup of tea.

I really recommend starting the bible in a year by Fr Mike Schmitz. It'd be a good way to get through it.

You're doing the right thing focusing on the gospels. I did some reading around the gospels to understand the history. Nick page is a good Christian historian. I loved his history of Christianity. It's funny!

I also liked "Can We Trust the Gospels?" By Peter J Williams.

A really nice app I would recommend is Lectio365. It has a bible reading morning and evening and is a very gentle and contemplative way to spend time with God. I particularly like the evening ones and find them the perfect way to switch off and end the day.

https://www.24-7prayer.com/resource/lectio-365/

I was very much a lapsed Christian for a large chunk of my life but recently came back to my faith very strongly when not expecting it at all. I'm now reading the Bible daily and studying it, I feel more and more like listening to Christian music, Christian podcasts and finding other Christian communities online! Any other subject and I'd say I was obsessed! 😅I do try and balance my other responsibilities!

Perhaps it's a sign of the times, a sign that the 'end of days' is at hand, that's why so many are re-awakening to the faith now.

As someone who was brought up in a massive Christian family and knows no different (but did make my own decision of faith at 18) I'm really excited about people coming to faith like this!

I would maybe try to look for a big church where they might have groups for those who are at an early stage in their faith. You'd be very welcome in a smaller church too (my dh is a minister in a church of around 40-50) but it's really hard to run Bible studies for the whole range. My dd at uni goes to a huge church, where they regularly run groups for different categories of people, sometimes they run during the sermon on Sunday mornings and sometimes in the midweek in homes.

The YouVersion Bible app is also really good and has lots of reading plans, videos etc as well as pretty much every English translation of the Bible, so you can find your preferred one.

Hi and welcome to the Christian faith @JustCosy! How exciting, my conversion wasn't as dramatic. A friend made a comment about church, I realised I needed to go to one, but hers wasn't suitable. Started praying and a flyer came through the door for a children's holiday club at the local Baptist church. DS1 went & loved it, I followed & started attending services regularly with DSs 2,3 & later 4.

Ask God where you should go. I would also recommend the Freedom in Christ course, I believe it's now called Disciple.

I was going to suggest this too. It’s great! I like the morning and evening dovetailing of the day!

https://jubd.uk/rETOcy
This the YouVersion bible app, which you may have discovered already. There are loads of bible reading plans, some short and long. Advent ones tend to be excellent. (The short website is because I pinched from my husband as he was preparing Alpha resources earlier).

There’s also on the app, a “Bible in one year” with Nicky and Pippa Gumbel. “The Bible with Nicky and Pippa Gumbel is a daily plan that takes you through the whole Bible in just one year. It's for anyone looking for a simple, structured way to read the Bible. Each day is broken down into short, bitesize readings: one Psalm or Proverb, one Old, and one New Testament reading, alongside commentary and practical insights from Nicky and Pippa.” I can’t work out a fancy link for this one, so sorry about that!

No new suggestions to add, just wanted to wish you well on your spiritual journey/transition/awakening!
There is so much out there now, it can get very overwhelming.
Hopefully you can find a church that feels right for you. They all have something to offer- you don't have to stick to just one!
Let us know how the next little while goes for you!

I'm so glad you're on this journey, and so resolved to learn and set a new path for your life.
Please do find a church, because the enemy will look for an opportunity to derail you, and you will need the support and friendship of others on this journey.

A church with an active local presence will have a website, so look for a few, and resolve to go to a church somewhere every Sunday until you find the one that fits best (I say "fits best" because no church is perfect).

Enjoy the journey. I became Christian as a young adult with no family background of faith, but not your background of satanic practises. We have a new Christian in our church who has also just come to faith and is pulling out of some of the things you describe.

Keep going!

Thank you everyone for your wonderful suggestions and links. My new huge study Bible arrived today, so I am starting that tomorrow along with a study plan. Next step is to find a church 😍

Wow, that was awesome to read. I want to say congratulations strangely.
I experienced this a couple of years ago, it happened during COVID at the lowest point in my life and can only describe it how you did as "involuntary".
I became a Muslim, though I am also a Christian and a Jew as Islam is of course these faiths combined. I suddenly started reading the bible, Torah & Quran and something clicked in me, I stopped listening to music (or at least was more conscious of my choices with the respect of the lyrics and the artist) and I just became a lighter person, more at peace.
Enjoy the experience and know that God made that happen for a reason, everything in your life has brought you to this change. Begin prayer and embrace this new you!

Just to add, something of interest to people may be to look up "the dark night of the soul", it might resonate with some. It's a complicated thing to discuss and comprehend but it's common and on YouTube people have shared their experience and how they became spiritual following that time in their lives. Not saying this happened to you OP but just putting it out there for anyone going through it!

You might appreciate This Instagram profile. Young guy called Ged who is a social media influencer (way younger than me!) whose life has been radically transformed since he came to church, and then to faith, kind of out of the blue, coming up to a year ago now. He’s using his platform now to share openly about how God’s changed his life

@hihoo
I stopped listening to music (or at least was more conscious of my choices with the respect of the lyrics and the artist)

I haven’t stopped listening to music, but I have been very upset about some (practically all) of the song lyrics I hear. Not just new releases, a lot of the 80s tracks as well. I didn’t realize how inappropriate and unpleasant they were. I don’t see why so many songs have to be about drugs, sex and depression, all aimed at kids and teens.

Thanks again all, I've been enjoying your replies and suggestions!

Music has always bothered me, I've not listened to mainstream music in a long time. But recently found some Christian music by Hilsong that I'm enjoying. Particularly this beautiful song...