How do people with office jobs make pick up time?

[Duv]

I live in London about an hour from my office in central London, and have my 1 yr old in a nursery that operates 8am-6pm. This just about works for us as I WFH a fair bit and have some my office core hours are 10-4.

But we are planning on moving further out, outside London and commuting about 1.5hrs. Looking a nurseries and childminders in the local area of the new town almost none are open beyond 5.30, and 5 seems to be the norm, with some only open till 4! I appreciate 1.5hrs is a longer commute than most, but even if I had my existing commute time (and I think 1hr is pretty normal for a central London job) I have no idea how anyone is managing to pick up their child before 5.30? Aren't typically working hours 9-5.30? How are you guys doing it?

Nanny. No money left ever.

Would finding a nursery or childminder closer to work help?

The vast majority of people I know who have both parents working office hours out of the home have grandparents who do shit loads of childcare. Everyone else, parents have changed jobs or changed their hours to fit with children.

I work 22.5 hours spread over 4 days and mostly work in school hours.

Take turns WFH and take turns doing drop off and pickup. Also are you sure this move is actually possible? I wouldn't want to sign up for that kind of commute without some kind of amazing payoff - no point having a stunning house if you never see it.

One does dropoff and stays late, the other goes into work early and does pickup. And of course a 1.5h commute is bonkers.

I'm a lone parent have a WFH agreement some days, and on others I have permission to leave early to get back in time for pick up and then make up hours in the evening, which has not made me popular, but needs must unfortunately. That's on a 1 hour commute too.

Are both of you working 5 days on site until 5/5:30pm? If so I think that will be very difficult to sustain with a longer commute. Most families will use a mixture of opposing WFH days, compressed or flexible hours or part time work.

We found childcare close to where we worked rather than close to where we lived.

I'm a childminder and I've noticed pick up is getting earlier and earlier now. Most are gone by 5pm. I usually only have one child here for dinner these days.

I would say a 1.5h daily commute for you both, plus a nursery age child is probably impossible for any length of time.

Those I know with a longer commute work alternate days in the city. Or, one works locally.

I have known so, so many mothers end up quitting their jobs / changing career because they double commute + pick up thing is so impossible to manage.

I'm considering doing this as a temporary last resort if I can't get a place locally, but it would be much more expensive and mean taking my LO on a 3 hour public transport commute daily which would not be sustainable for either of us.

Don’t move further out. Moved closer and live in somewhere smaller. Or get a job somewhere closer to home .

school after school clubs are finished by 5/5.30 so that’s 7/8 years of childcare for 1 kid, longer for more.

I have always needed 8am-6pm childcare. I never chose a nursery or school that couldn't provide this, and my job and home can never be more than 50 minutes apart. I just wouldn't choose a longer journey or a place with poor childcare options.

Oh God don’t do that OP, delays and cancellations are bad enough without a toddler in tow, imagine having to squeeze onto a packed train with a tiny child, it’s not doable.

Me and my partner WFH a lot, though the precise amount is a bit tbh. We are not planning on daily commuting 1.5hours. i

Sometimes I wfh. Other times, when I'm in the office, OH collects as his work is close by.

Pre-covid/WFH people would either do a combination of grandparents and childminder (picking kids up at 630/7) or would have a nanny-share.

Yes, the only parents I knew when dd was primary age who both worked FT who didn't have local grandparents willing and able to help with the kids had an au pair.

We have no GP support so made sure we both had WFH roles before we had a child. It would have been almost impossible without that.

Only way we did it was change working hours so one of us started work at 7am and work until 4pm and did pick up, the other did drop off and finished work later.

I'm surprised by the opening hours you are finding as I'm in a middling Northern town where lots of people work steady but not particularly high-flying jobs and all settings I've come across are open til 6. Most children seem to be collected around 5 though which suggests people work shorter hours on pick up days, are WFH, are working PT or are able to use some sort of flexi time.

Look at different areas. I’m in a commuter area to London and our nurseries all open until 6pm.

I work slightly shorter hours on the 2 days I work in the office and make up the time on the other 2 days wfh (work a 4 day week, big corporate firm). DH works in A&E so we can't share the pick-ups/drop-offs unless he happens to have the day off (which usually means he's either working nights or the weekend). It's very, very hard and I am jealous of colleagues who are able to tag team with their partners!

We stagger our working hours. I'm lucky that I can walk to school in my "lunch break" (don't get time to eat!) then at 4 DH takes over. It's a bit hectic but works ok.

Previously DD was in preschool 9-3 and I picked her up and caught up work in the evening. Don't recommend that though - knackering and no free time at all!

This is the best option imo. Your child spends 3 hours a day with you rather than the nursery.

We share drop offs and pick ups and wfh whenever possible. Colleagues leave early and do another hour or so from home.

If you're going fire a commute that long you need a nanny really. You could find another family locally and share a nanny between you.

Most people with office jobs don't have a 60-90 minute commute.