Getting Advice via Internet Forums - Employers of Nannies, Nannies, Childminders etc.

[nannynick]

Someone posting information on a website, asking for advice about a situation, happens often.
Sometimes that person is an employer, sometimes they are a childcare provider.
If no one is able to connect that persons message, with RL... then there isn't a great issue. But sometimes those in the know, can connect the message with RL.
Is there a soluition to that? We all like to be able to discuss things with our Mumsnet friends. The CAT system is terribly slow (as it's a human), and we may not know our Mumsnet friends in RL, so only have their Mumsnet username as a means of contact.
Posting about a situation at work - can be very educational for others. Such as a childminder posting about problems getting parents to pay on time, will result in other people saying what has worked for them in the past. Employers of nannies will ask for advice about how to handle a situation, be it redundancy, a nanny who is often sick, or what gift/bonus to give at Xmas.
What is the soluition? If people don't discuss things then they bottle it up and it explodes at a later date!

But they use the same pc? ?

I would absolutely hate to think that my children were in such unprofessional care.

If you had read the other thread before it got deleted you would know that raeanne was on a playdate at my house. Hence using the same pc!

(Im not working today incase anyone jumps on me..I just have my dc with me)

I forgot to change the login before I posted!

Jenna

Judgenutmeg- Thats a little unfair. There are 3 children here at the moment and they are drawing in the kitchen with Rachel. They are warm, well fed, safe, entertained and happy.... They have been supervised, safe, and happy 100% of the time today!

How can her employers children be in her care if she is posting merrily away? Do you mean that she is 'on a playdate' without her employers children? How can they be her number one concern and how can she attending to their care and development if they are with her but she is engaged in personal entertainment. Is this what she is paid to do?

I'm frankly boggled by this.

That's such cobblers.

Sorry pressed post to soon.

I was going to add that just because a nanny is having problems with her employer does not mean the care of the children will suffer in any way.

For the time that Raeanne was on the computer I was playing with the children..no different to if one of us had been in the kitchen making dinner! Infact better levelof care as we were both in the room together.

I think this is a bit personal now..You don't know any of us but you are happy to shoot the poor nanny down straight away!!

I think posting personal informatio about your nanny/your employer falls in the same category as posting rl information about anyone really. i.e. don't post anything you wouldn't want people in rl to read.

I have come on here and posted information about my personal life, nothing that intimate, but enough information, ie town I live in/things about me, that it wouldn't be hard for people in rl to recognize me if they wanted to do so.

no-one really knows who reads these forums. My family don't know I come here, so similrly they might come here and I don't know. so surely the best way is to change as many details as possible so as to not make it obvious who you are.

as for Jenna, or whoever she is, I suspect she posted on that thread deliberately to alert the nanny in question to it. pretty low if you ask me.

Dear me, it all sounds very unprofessional, and Losttheclock hasn't had an opportunity to discuss things with her employee, yet Reanne & Jenna are between them, discussing with the nation on various forums.

I would be surprised if the relationship has not already broken down.

FWIW, and I know it is a bit off subject, I don't think it is reasonable to be paid for Good Friday. Bank holidays are normally paid on a pro rata basis, and entitlement accrues throughout the year, not as soon as you start working a different day. (For example, if someone works for only 6 months of the year, they are only entitled to half annual leave allowance and half bank holidays). But I think the employer (by whatever nom de plume) did the right thing by trying to find objective information about the situation. It shows she was taking the employee's concerns seriously.

The decent thing to do would be to take those children home. Their mum must be rather upset.

Mum is at work

and why should they go home they are having a lovely time playing together..... wtf!

And if I was employing you, and discovered you were supposedly looking after my children, yet posting on the internet about me whilst they were in your care, I am sorry, but I would sack you. This is a breach of trust. One thing to raise issues such as this in your own time, not on your employers.

""she is amazing with your children, caring and loving and they respond to her very well and are incredibly happy
in her care"".

well she obviously ain't that great or her employer wouldn't be sacking her.

Wannabe- The nanny is my friend and she alerted me to the post not the other way round....! I was sticking up for her...LOW...LMAO [grin}

If you are going to post at least make sure you get your facts straight!

Ive had enough of this now. There is NO need to personally attack someone on a thread surely, its just nasty and unecessary!

Good grief.

If someone is posting on the interweb for advice, leave them to it, even if it's about you. Contact them offline and discuss.

Leaping onto a thread and letting rl into mn is weirdy and creepy. Have some dignity ffs.

Wanna be- again if you had read the post that you are quoting from and weren't taking my quote out of context you would know why the nanny was having problems!!!

I don't see that the nanny did anything wrong posting for advice and support on a nanny forum ... and I note that neither employer nor friend of employer launched into a defence of the employer on that thread

I honestly think the difference here is that the mother / employer has not been given the same courtesy

It is a sad situation all round. I hope the nanny comes out of it with as much dignity as the mother is

I agree with WanderingTrolley

JudgeNutMeg do parents not get together and discuss what their nannies do? on here
I was a nanny for many years, with excellent references and the children did colouring etc, while I did cooking cleaning and ironing for the children, and I might add jobs for the parents! How does that help the children's developement? If they were too old for a nap would do it while they did colouring etc! why can't the nanny take some time out to do something for herself? Even if it was just a cuppa
Parents who go out to work get a lunch break and can get out for an hour, nannies can't!
I don't think too many details were given on NJ, I've discussed problems on there at times and helped the others too but without giving names etc

"Ive had enough of this now. There is NO need to personally attack someone on a thread surely, its just nasty and unecessary!"

so you jumping into a thread that had been posted by someone wanting advice (under a namechange so not intending to reveal her identity), telling her you know her and know her nanny and how wonderful her nanny is and how much her children love her is not in any way personal? oh no.

was to Twig btw.

Is this going to turn into a nanny vs parent fight debate?

Jenna - I read both threads - the deleted one and the one on NJ and I didn't have the slightest issue with the employer - she asked for advice, refused to divulge details and from what I can tell she hadn't even done anything wrong in the first place (quite OK to include Bank Hols in annual leave entitlement of 24 days, rather than paying extra when your friend didn't work that day anyway). However the posts by you & your friend have come across as 100% unprofessional. You are BOTH being paid today, why do you think it ok for only ONE of you to work at a time, whilst the other comes on here to have a go at someone, give away their names and a whole host of other details in order to 'out' the employer.

FFS.