My 4y/o will be in school from 7:30 till around 6pm

[wm2]

I’ve just been offered a new job, i assumed it was 9-5 because online it says the office closes at 5pm. I had 3 interviews and at stupidly I never asked to double check.

Once I got contract to sign it said the hours were 9-6 or I can work 8-5 4 days a week. Fridays are a late start and early finish which is great. After school club finishes at 6pm so my only option is 8-5.

breakfast club opens at 7:30am and I don’t drive so unless I get taxis to work I need to get the bus for 6:40am. My sister lives round the corner and has offered to pick my son up at 6:30 and take him to breakfast club for 7:30am.

My son needs a little time to wake up in the morning before I get him dressed so I’d need to be waking him up at 5:30am.

5:30am - 6pm seems like such a long day for someone in reception but I don’t have much choice, it’s been a struggle to find a job let alone one that’s strictly 9-5 and no weekends.

I feel incredibly guilty, is there any other single mums that had to have a routine like this? Did you see any changes in your child’s behaviour? Anything you found that helps?

Thank you

@blahblahblah1654 I can encourage whatever I think is appropriate! And for a single mother it is, if you don’t like that you can keep your bias to yourself!

@Mumofkidsx3 you are entitled to your opinion, as I'm entitled to mine. You don't need to be sensitive/angry about it. I wasn't.

@blahblahblah1654 your opinion is about mine and wasn’t asked for. I was replying to the actual thread question. Don’t reply to me anymore I have no desire to hear your entitled opinion.

@Mumofkidsx3 I'm not sure if you understand what "entitled" means. You just keep repeating the word in the wrong context.

Good luck with getting everything and congratulations on the new job 🥳

I also don’t think it is appropriate to encourage someone, who has started a thread asking how to cope with her new full time job, to work part time and claim benefits. Where is the money tree?
Also whilst her childcare costs may seem high to start with they will reduce and her salary may increase.

it’s not just about money though, there has to be a balance for family life, it’s not wrong to consider all the options and that’s all I was saying.

Oh OP, I really feel for you in this tricky situation. But just couldn't do it myself - getting yourself ready and presentable for work plus your child ready for school is such hard work in the Morning, especially if they're already knackered! Talking from experience!
I would honestly continue to look for work elsewhere with more suitable hours instead of starting and struggling! What about when your Sister is ill / has annual leave / training days etc.. Children going to School absolutely changes the dynamic to all of your lives. It's a lot! Best of luck and hope something works out for you

Someone may have already mentioned this but if you do 9-6 at least you can take him to school yourself and he gets a bit more sleep. You’ve then only got to find cover from 3-6.30 ish rather than the mornings too.

I agree. Save me the hand wringing about “where is the money tree?” and instead let’s worry about how our benefits system is relentlessly exploited and defrauded. I have no issue with genuine people claiming for genuine reasons.

Exactly @Jellycats4life, for last 14 years I been working, and struggling to balance child care, family life and I had no clue I could get help, until I got to my wits end and lost my job because of my child needing me (he has medical and SEND). So it is fact that people who need the help don’t always know they can get it. Let’s not auto assume that when someone mentions benefits it’s a negative. Just advise to check out individual personal circumstances and how the system can help WHEN required. Take care all 🥰

Sorry but it's far to long a day for a young child especially if they are in school.There is significant evidence tired children struggle to learn and your child will be permanently exhausted doing that so the knock on effect is potentially huge. I was in childcare for 10 to 11 hours a day 5 data a week from that age and absolutely hated it. I actually really liked the person who looked after me but I missed my mum and she missed a lot of us growing up. She now regrets it. Have you thought about asking if there is any flexibility on the hours?

Your dc will be ok but I expect you will burn out. I couldn't even sustain 4 days a week with 2 little dc's and had to drop to 3.
I'd look for a different job.

I agree. I really don't think it's worth it. It will be a horrible struggle for you and your child. I'd keep looking even if it takes a long time to find the right job. There are jobs with more family friendly hours.

@Jellycats4life
" instead let’s worry about how our benefits system is relentlessly exploited and defrauded. I have no issue with genuine people claiming for genuine reasons."

Benefit fraud is peanuts compared to tax avoidance. It's not hard to work out which is targeted by government and media.

It's really hard but all of mine managed long days when they were little. I found childcare during school holidays to be much more difficult and expensive though. Good luck with everything!

I would do 9/6

Take to school yourself and if need be drop at breakfast club 730/8

He gets to stay in bed till 7ish

How far is school away from your house

Giving you an hour to get to work via cycling

It's the bus that's makin Fb day sinking so you need to find a better way to get to work

Then a cm to pick him up from school. Back to hers and you pick up

He will be shattered. The first term esp as hits towards December and dark and getting up at 530 just isn't feasible in the long run

Xxxx

If your sister is able to come to you to pick son up 6.30 could she get him up at 6.30? And be at yours sort his brekkie and teeth? Maybe you could pay her a little for this and do the taxi on one or 2 days a week?

Can you not offer a female student lodging in exchange for her giving your child breakfast and taking him to child care?
Or consider sharing a house with another single parent who works late shifts... and you pick up two children, for example.

Why do people think OP has a spare room for an au pair or lodger, given her tight finances? Or to buy a moped?

OP, you need to take this job and use your sister, nothing else is practical with you starting next week. I would get a taxi on Tuesdays or Wednesdays so your sister is only covering three days and your LO gets a couple of longer sleeps in the week.

Once they know you at work, you may be able to get a lift with a local colleague, hence leaving later. Or they may let you WFH or have a shorter lunch break once they trust you to do the work.

Try it and see.