The problem is shown by the poster who just said that the grandchildren and childcare IS the GPs responsibility, because the GP is the OPs Mum.
No. People never stop being parents, but their responsibility in a day-to-day basis for the minutiae of their kids lives stops. Standing on your own two feet is part of being an adult.
Perhaps in some circles, adult children never really ‘grow up’ and become independent. Perhaps they continue to cling onto their parents and their parents to them and flying the nest and becoming grown up doesn’t happen. You see it with alt children who expect to eat regularly at their parents, or to be driven around like teenagers, despite living elsewhere. It reminds me of Denise in the Royle family, she’d have expected Barbara to do everything, because that was her role as a mother. But Denise was the eternal child - that was the comedy of it. But sounds like there are people like that in real life.
Are these people also still constantly ringing their Dad to come and do bits of DIY that they could learn to do themselves…but never actually even consider because ‘that’s Dads job’ or dropping their ironing off for their Mum to do? Sometimes parents encourage this too…they allow themselves to be at the c
beck and call if their adult offspring and will cancel anything else if one of their kids makes a demand. Perhaps OP’s mother has been like this (or not) and sees that before the child arrives, it’s time to draw a line? Why did OP assume this would happen? Is it that she lives in an area where people don’t use childcare and grandparents do lots of it? Perhaps it is more the norm where she lives, but it will never be everyone having local, parent based childcare.
Fortunatelybthe vast majority say the OP is being entitled and brattish. They don’t sound mature. This surprise pregnancy and child isn’t the height of mature thinking and planning, and neither are the thoughts in childcare. Sorry if that sounds harsh. How’s the time to do some growing up and taking responsibility.