Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

Parents sending children to cm while they are on holiday themselves

663 replies

susiemumof · 17/05/2012 12:29

Not looking for a argument or aibu type thread.

Am new to cm and have a 6mo mindee 60 hours per week, mum has a day off next week (which she did not even need to tell me about) but has said she will still send said mindee as she would like a day to herself.

I actually offer a large discount on days when mindees are not with me so can't even put it down to wanting to get her monies worth.

Was just really wondering how common other childminders have found this?

It's obviously no problem for me to have the child and I am loving my new job, it just makes me a bit sad for the baby itswim.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
scottishmummy · 21/05/2012 21:54

speak for yourself,I'm guilt free using nursery
don't assume guilt because you feel it
why would I be guilty at being a provider and good role model
and i think the working mum deserves a medal for being so driven,and industrious.

Original poster
susiemumof · 21/05/2012 22:04

Eastnorth, god knows why I've not hidden! I still find it laughable that my op has triggered this reaction. Like naughtymummy's childminder my parents know I'm available to look after their children during contract hours whether it's work or something else. I've had a couple of early starts/ late finishes the last few weeks for one thing or another.

I was asking specifically about how common it was to have a child for the full day when the parent was off, it's not something I have ever done myself and I was surprised the parent was doing it seeing as how I also charge less on these days.

It was a total innocent question, like I said in my op it's no bother to have lovely mindee and her mum did not even need to tell me she was off. I was just surprised that she was off but was still sending mindee. Not because I think she does not love her enough or that she should be shackled to her child as she has no business working 60 hours a week Confused

OP posts:
EclecticShock · 21/05/2012 22:08

OP, it's my homes opinion that you might be being disingenuous now. It was blatantly a judgement on your client without actually knowing her situation :(

EclecticShock · 21/05/2012 22:11

Typo, should have said honest opinion. It really is no concern of yours, unless you are seriously worried about her welfare, which you don't appear to be.

Original poster
susiemumof · 21/05/2012 22:13

Yes you are right eclectic! I am ready to admit it now. I totally judge any woman who works 60 hours a week and has children. I can't imagine for the life of me how any mum would ever work that many hours in one week! Thank fuck it's not me.

OP posts:
thebody · 21/05/2012 22:15

Can't belive this still running and some of the posts have been fierce but it's an indication of the difficulties and predjuces of being a working mum in our society.

As a full time working mum who runs a child minding business, 10 hours a day 5 days a week I work far longer than any of the mindees mums.

The guilt of this has now made me give notice and I finish soon.

Please take it from this cm and many others on the thread that I certainly don't judge mindees parents and don't care a jot what they are doing when I mind their children as long as they pay me on time and in full.

I think susie sounds a lovely caring cm with the child though but it's best to keep parents on side as babies and toddlers can't write cheques!!.

eastnorth · 21/05/2012 22:15

But I don't think you did judge her when I read it, I got the impression that you were surprised and not that you thought she was a horrible mother.

EclecticShock · 21/05/2012 22:16

Fwiw, I'm glad its not me either, it's not an envious position IMO but needs must sometimes...

monkeymoma · 21/05/2012 22:16

it was NOT an innocent quetion

"how often to parents send children to CMs on days when they're not working and how do you feel about it?" = genuine innocent question

posting about one family's circumstance to slag them off is not, it was not necessary to profile that family and it was very unprofessional

eastnorth · 21/05/2012 22:18

How did she profile the family?

scottishmummy · 21/05/2012 22:19

you also work 60hr week Susie as cm
if the mindee is with you 60hr then you're presumably charging eg claim to be working

meaning your own kids dont get undivided time and precious moments with their own mum...
as you too work and invoice for a 60hr week

eastnorth · 21/05/2012 22:21

Yes but divided time is better than no time scottishmummy.

scottishmummy · 21/05/2012 22:28

finally suspected susie fessed up to being judgey cm
as many said all along
now she can post away til her wee heart content
I knows a mum who works 60hr week (oh aye it's Susie) well she knows another mum who works and...

Original poster
susiemumof · 21/05/2012 22:29

Yes Scottish I was being ironic in my last post [sigh] I am well aware if mindees mum works 60 hours a week then her childcare needs to cover these hours as well!

Monkey what post did I write that on? Asking how others felt about it? Give me the time of the post.

OP posts:
Original poster
susiemumof · 21/05/2012 22:30

Did you honestly not think I had realised I put in a 60 hour week as well? Seriously!

OP posts:
thebody · 21/05/2012 22:33

Actually eastnorth, not sure I agree with that as its harder for your own Dcs to see mum pay far more attention to another child in 'their' house.

Children of mums who work outside the home give their children undivided attention at home.

Cms children usually don't half share mum they are last on the list and share their toys, pets and garden as well.

Not moaning that's the job but it's incredibly hard on minders own children.

That's why I have given notice.

FunnysInLaJardin · 21/05/2012 22:35

ah well, thankfully my CM doesn't judge me, because doncha know tis the last thing a hard working professional mum wants. She'll be judged enough at work as it is.

And in a different life that 60hr a week mum would have been me.

eastnorth · 21/05/2012 22:39

Yes the body probably is hard but I bet you have managed sports days and things and at least been there. You know your child better than anyone else. It's heartbreaking my nanny taught my son to ride a bike and it wasn't me. Things like that make the difference.

I bet susiemumof will see the baby walk first before the mum too.

DuelingFanjo · 21/05/2012 23:44

"they are last on the list"

reall I doubt that very much. If I were a childminder with kids of my own they would still be first on my list. i think any childminder who says differently is barking.

InterviewMAD · 21/05/2012 23:50

I wonder who would a CM save first in a fire...

Tanith · 22/05/2012 05:23

A bit of a silly example, MAD. We have fire procedures that rely on advice from the fire brigade. We evacuate them all together, unless they are asleep upstairs, and the fire brigade has told us to leave the professionals to rescue them. The door has to be closed and the window safely ajar.

bigpaws · 22/05/2012 06:47

Comments are very unreasonable. Some of you must live for a good confrontation - a bit like the playground bullies.
I am sure the original OP was raising this due to the 60hrs this 6mth old is left? That is an extreme case. Two of my CM families are on maternity leave, however I still mind the toddlers 2 days a week - wont go into lengthy detail why as it is obvious. However, mum is at home and kids come to me. Parents are happy, kids are happy; I'm happy. These children aren't left childcare for 60hrs a week though (even when both parents are working)
Susie, change your arrangements to charge full pay regardless of child being off. Think of this thread and remember you are running a business - you don't owe your clients financial favours. Working
Mums get paid holiday entitlement - you are a working mum too.

thebody · 22/05/2012 06:49

How silly interview and what bad taste.

I can assure you that my Dcs were last on the list and that's why I am giving notice as stated before.

Sports days, oh dear that's just funny. My youngest dd runs for the county, I had to miss all of her races and heats as it was during My WORKING WEEK and I have 4 under 4 every day so couldn't possibly go.

Not moaning but please don't let this turn into how lucky cms are to be with their kids all day as any cm can tell you that's crap and they are put last.

It's not an easy way to stay at home with your own kids and earn cash, it's a job like everyone else's with good and bad aspects.

FayeGovan · 22/05/2012 09:34

I don't get your post thebody

why did you choose to have 4 under 4 every day if you didn't want childminding to impact so much on your family life? you could have cut your numbers and made it to sports day or whatever

thats the beauty of childminding, you choose how many kids you take on and how much you earn

when I did it I only have a couple of kids and so didn't earn much

but it suited me and my family

that way its doable, not a screaming nightmare...

redglow · 22/05/2012 10:18

When I did my ofstead course which was gone with childminders, all fifteen said they were doing it to fit in with their own children and might go back to their other jobs when their kids have grown up.

I think it's a brilliant job to fit in with children, as is nannying and taking my own children.

But like Faye says 4 under 4 is hard work and your own wouldn't get a look in.

Swipe left for the next trending thread