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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

hmmmm parents home late again and my son 10th birthday hmmm

135 replies

happychappy · 02/02/2012 18:54

not happy

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Flisspaps · 02/02/2012 18:56

Are you a CM or a nanny?

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:07

nanny so no even at my home. The kids granddad has come from Italy and its his last night and my husband has planned really special night. They knew all this and rang 10 minutes after they were supposed to be home and said can I stay. What else am I to do leave him alone in the house?
pissed off

OP posts:

Flisspaps · 02/02/2012 19:08

:( Bugger, was going to suggest implementation of late fees if you were a CM (and at least you'd be home)

Ringing 10 minutes after they were due back is not on, even with a nanny, surely?

BIWI · 02/02/2012 19:10

Goodness I'd be angry.

Obviously you can't leave the child, but would it be possible to take him to your house, and insist that the parents come and pick him up from you?

I realise this will interfere with your plans somewhat, but at least you will be in your own home and with your son.

And then you need to sit down with your employers and have a serious chat about their time-keeping and boundaries.

(and I speak here as someone who used to employ a nanny - I would never have dreamed of doing this!)

missismac · 02/02/2012 19:12

Bung him in the car or whatever, leave a note saying where you & he are (at your home) and go. They are outrageously taking the p here & you need to make it clear that you won't tolerate it.

Their kid is safe and in your care, but your child is not missing out on his Mum being at his special birthday celebration.

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:14

cant its far tooo cold to drag him out on a 20 minute journey to my house. Dont get me started on this.
they can home once on a monday and asked for hime to stay with him for 4 nights and didnt want to pay me for it. They go away alot and feel that I get the time off other times.
ITS MY SON FUCKING BIRTHDAY!!!!!!
They know as well

OP posts:

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:15

we had a discussion about birthday presents this morning

OP posts:

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:20

just got another phone call they are half an hour away. Had my pissed off voice on so they know I'm not happy

OP posts:

BIWI · 02/02/2012 19:22

Take him home. It's only 20 minutes - he won't die!

If you don't, you're being a bit martyrish about it. When they come home, will you just fume silently and seethe resentment? Or will you actually say something to them?

If you take him home with you, and make them come and pick him up, then you are asserting yourself - but not in a way that they can fault.

You need to make it abundantly clear that this is unacceptable and that they can't do this to you.

Flisspaps · 02/02/2012 19:22

In that case, I'd head home with their DS in your car. Yes, it's cold but you can wrap him up warmly (how old is he?)

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:27

he's 3 and asleep. I generally have taken him home but he has been awake at that point. Its seems so mean to him to drag him out of bed to go into another bed then be dragged back again and woken up again because his parents cant reasonably organise their time or let others know their plans. If they had rang an hour or half an hour before I could have done that and all would have been fine (ish).

OP posts:

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:29

I see all these parents complain about their nannies/childminders and wonder how many think how much we put up with.

Dad rang and asked if I was okay and I said it's DS birthday and theres a massive dinner planned they are all sitting waiting for me to eat. He said we are 30 mins away. hmmmm That all I can really say

OP posts:

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:29

I saw a couple of jobs advertised recently and have been considering applying for this and a number of other niggles of a similar scale

OP posts:

SauvignonBlanche · 02/02/2012 19:31

They're taking the piss!

littleducks · 02/02/2012 19:32

Hope they are back now, but seriously I wouldnt worry about taking your charge home, let the car run to heat up and take blankets.

Original poster

happychappy · 02/02/2012 19:33

in many ways. Its one of the main differences between nannies and CM. You can just charge them and get rid no problem. Can really say too much you're so dependent of clean references.

OP posts:

Heswall · 02/02/2012 19:35

Are you still being paid whilst you bitch about your employers mumsnet ?

Flisspaps · 02/02/2012 19:36

I hope you the OP is being paid whilst her employers arse her about, apparently not for the first time.

missismac · 02/02/2012 19:38

Who are you going to be 'mean' to your 3 year old charge, or your 10 year old son? I'd have put him in the car, taken him to mine, let the parents collect him from there and they can deal with the flack.

Alternatively I'd tell them next time it happens you'll be phoning social services to come & take him as you have other commitments and have to leave on time. It's what the nurseries round here do, I don't see why you shouldn't do it too.

They are incredibly disrespectful, but as someone else said you do sound a bit martyr-ish about this situation.

stuffthenonsense · 02/02/2012 19:38

Oh thats awful....hope your son is not too disappointed....as for this family...they care not about inconveniencing you at no notice...how would it be if you took your extra time worked tonight, in the morning, no notice, then they will be late for work and maybe appreciate you a little more (clearly dont do this if you well get sacked but how watertight is your contract?)

hohohoshedittant · 02/02/2012 19:41

I don't think you should wake a sleeping child and drag him out in the cold for the sake of 30mins. If they were hours away it would be different. As a nanny you should always do what is in the best interest of the child no matter how annoying the parents may be. I would have a firm word with them though. Maybe tell them you'll be coming in an hour late tomorrow and see how they feel about that.

Your son is 10 so will understand why you're late and you can make it up to him another time.

PommePoire · 02/02/2012 20:15

Heswall, OP's charge is asleep and the parents should have been home by now, so she's certainly done all the tidying up and straightening and is now on her own time, which reasonably she can use to let off steam on MN, no?

BIWI · 02/02/2012 20:19

Goodness, Heswall - read the flipping posts properly!

anewyear · 02/02/2012 20:25

But how does the Op know they're not hours away!!
Any one can make a phone call and say 'Im half an hour away'
And why should a 10yr old have to understand his mums gonna be late on HIS birthday simply because her employers cant get their act together!!
Martyrish..Really?

rubyslippers · 02/02/2012 20:27

That is so flipping rude of them

I employ a nanny and would never dream of not ringing especially when I know the nanny has plans

I think you need to say something and soon

It is not acceptable for them to to do this

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