Be honest and tell me how painful it will really be giving birth??

[Chelle1986]

You see I've been really lucky in life and have never been hospitalised or broke a bone of anything that has caused me loads of pain - touch wood. And I'm really worried that because of this I won't be able to cope with labour....am i being stupid? Am 6 months currently.xxx

rhinocerous through a cat flap type pain.

does hurt.

allot
allot
allot

but gas n air is lush, as are epidurals

yy it hurts,

BUT you will cope with it, somehow. I never understood how much it would hurt and tbh wish I had had an inkling as it was a bit of a shock.

You'll be OK. Try not to be fearful of the pain - that will only make it worse.

Chelle, what IS the worst pain you have had?

You will be able to cope. I'd never broken anything or been in proper pain before, either. It was INCREDIBLY painful and shocked me to the core, but my body took over and I just went with it. Remember each contraction won't last longer than a minute or a minute and a half, so you could count to 60 during each one (if you're still able to count!) and then it will be over.

Anyway if you can't cope, there is pain relief - no medals for doing it without any! (the only reason I did was because I was at home and didn't like the G&A)

Worst pain I've ever had - god I don't know! I chipped a tiny bit of bone off my ankle once and that hurt alot - but I just cannot picture myself in labour! It just seems like its never going to happen!!

C.xxx

Of course you'll be able to cope with it, millions of women have done it before you. Yes, it hurts, but it's "positive" pain, if that makes sense, and delivering a baby will be your proudest achievement. Giving birth for me was like running a marathon. At the time you think you cannot bear it any longer, you work so hard, it feels like an impossible task, you do not think you can keep dealing with the pain any longer, but you DO, you find something within yourself, get to the end.....and it's the most incredible feeling of achievement with the most amazing prize. Within minutes you will have forgotten all about it. Sorry to sound so evangelical, but that's how it was for me (and I did it again, twice....).

The thing is, there's no comparison and no 'average pain'. Because I can tell you it felt like being torn in half but you don't know what that feels like. And one woman may experience labour as painful but utterly manageable and another as so excruciating she thinks she is dying.

The best advice I can give to you is to try and be open to whatever birth you are given. Think how you'd like to cope, look at breathing and water and drugs and everything else you'll have as options (breathing not an option though really but ykwim), be mentally prepared and positive. Don't beat yourself up if it doesn't go to plan or it isn't like somebody once described.

My contractions lasted 2.5 minutes with a 30 second break for the last 12hrs. It was nothing, nothing, nothing like the textbooks said it might be and I was in utter shock. I wish I'd not been convinced it would be a certain way and just taken what had come along.

"Within minutes you will have forgotten all about it."

3 years on and I can remember it in the most minute detail. It's just soooo different for everybody.

its not that bad , more like bad period pains (labour) and a chinese-burn in the fango (actual birth bit).
Im a major cry-baby...i howl when i get a papercut ,but i have given birth 5 times , with very little pain relief...(disclaimer - had epidural with twins because i was forced to have it ,but stupid midwife forgot to tell me you had to press the button to get the drugs! , so really had nothing with twins) .

Sometimes I think the best thing is to go into this confident and open to what happens.

You don't really know what your personal pain threshold is. I don't think hearing other people's horror stories is going to help because for every horror story there are so many positives that we don't hear about.

I think every labour is different.

There are women who have pain free labours.

Mine weren't pain free but more uncomfortable, I'd say. And very tiring.

You have so many ways available to you that will help you cope.

Get your TENS on at the first sign of labour. Gas and air is also great later on.

Make sure you have privacy and space the way you need it.

Make sure you have someone you trust and who knows what you want throughout your labour. It helps a lot.

Don't panic. Don't let fear take you away.

And you have the option of epidural too.

i had chipped bone in my coxics (spell?)...thats defo a worse pain than birth/labour.

Excrutiating, but no probs with an epidural.

drloves, the thing is you are talking about your labours and deliveries. 'It's not that bad' is your experience and dismissive of those women for whom it was really rather bad indeed. I have a very high pain threshold. Have broken bones and not been checked for several weeks. I don't cry with pain. Labour? Hell on earth.

But but but Chelle, I had a malpositioned baby and an intervention heavy birth. It is not the norm. Most deliveries are straightforward. I am not trying to scare you, just let you know that you could ask a million women for their experiences and none of them will be indicative of what yours will be.

I think the trick is to have a 'coping' plan and then get stuck into practising it when you are in early labour and not even in much pain. If you can do it then, it helps build you your endorphones, rather than trying to ignoring it for as long as you can and then suddenly realising you can't cope and just don't know what to do with yourself.

hth

very painful but not comparable with any other pain you get by hurting yourself - it really does feel like a different "positive" pain. I am a wuss and I managed with just gas and air - twice - and both huuuge babies. You can do it - try not to worry. Good luck!

I have never broken a bone or been in hospital for anything other than getting my tonsils out when I was young. I was induced and got to fully dilated with just a tens machine - then had to have a forceps delivery as monitors showed ds was in distress so had a spinal but it was honestly manageable. I think staying calm and understanding fully what my body was trying to do as well as slow controlled breathing during contractions made a world of difference for me and the way that I experienced the pain.

ShowOfHands - it's 100% true that once I was clutching my new babe I forgot all about the pain of the previous few hours (I was actually laughing hysterically), but as I went into labour with the next one it suddenly came back to me...."oh no, I remember now...."

my labour was very painful. I was thinking, kill me now. if it's honesty you want! i have no idea what my pain threshold is. On that occasion it went out the window, becuase i was in an exhausted state b4hand. Had had 5 months of crippling spd, and about 48 hours of no sleep before hand. Long labour, stuck baby, bad bad tears.
thats what happened to me.

Like others have said, I think you need to look at your choices like pain relief, labour/birth positions etc as if you feel prepared for all eventualities you will feel more in control whatever is thrown at you.

I have had 2 very different labours. Both very fast, but with DD it was more hard work and tiring than excruciating, but with DS it was so intense and fast that it was like all the pain was condensed into those few hours IYSWIM. But you will cope. I just kept telling myself that I'd already done months of pregnancy and this pain was just for a few hours. This too shall pass , type of thing!

Good luck!!

Painful, but while with first I was terrified (unplanned induction, so hurt more etc), I went into second quite confident- actually stayed at home til almost the last minute, dealt with cx v.well etc. Still got an epidural in the hospital- and it was bliss afterwards.

I think that the fear of the unknown can make things much worse.
I had two induced labours and one birth spontaneously [well following a sweep]
The first included some painful and scary contractions which I found hard to cope with.
The second had the same but because I was familiar with that pain seemed much less painful or scary.
The third I would say never got beyond uncomfortable. Whether because of confidence, familiarity, position of baby or just third time eh looseness I don't know.
Try not to get tense and scared [easier said than done], remeber that millions of women have done this and are still smiling, put yourself into the hands of a good midwife if you can.

No one can say. It's different for everyone.

For me, I would have much preferred death.

I had epidurals with two of them. The second one, I didn't have time for one.

I will never forget the pain of that.

It scarred me.

Imagine trying to shit out a filing cabinet !

See I never understand

'hurts more than you ever can believe possible, but you'll cope'

Well I never coped with my first. Just because it ends at some point doesn't mean the woman coped at all!