Support thread for those of us who are requesting an ELCS after a previous traumatic delivery

[withorwithoutyou]

Hello everyone.

I have noticed a lot of threads regarding requesting ELCS lately, probably because I am in the process of trying to request one myself!

I just wondered if it might be useful for us to have a support thread where we can talk this all through as I know it can be a challenging process to go through.

Can I please also ask in the nicest possible way that anybody contributing to this thread can respect our desire for ELCS over VB? Thank you!

Anyway, I'll start - I have one DD, born 20 months ago by forceps after failed ventouse. She weighed 9 pounds 11 and I am concerned this one will be heavier! I am 30 weeks and have my first consultants appt tomorrow where I will be requesting an ELCS!

my god having the most horrifc dreams, had headaches or the last 3 weeks, this whole will they let me wnt they?? is making me so annxious
feel as tho i cant enjoy my pregnancy with this worry hanging over my head, dnt no if iam wishing the appointment closer or not, want it over, why am i getting myself in such a state fear i guess!! aaaaggghhhh

Eek, I've got my CS pre-op appointment this afternoon. I have to meet the anaesthetist and midwife, have tests and go through the paperwork. Feel both excited and nervous, not really sure what to expect. Have you had yours yet 30ish? I'm sure it will make it all feel much more real. I thought I was having some twinges last night, but thankfully all seems to have calmed down today.

Hi Sophie, sorry you're having a horrible time - have you got your appt booked yet? It's so hard not to feel anxious I know, I would give you advice but I've been stressing for the last 3 months so I'm not much help! How many weeks are you now?

Ealey - wow let us know how your pre-op goes, good luck with it. Glad you're not having any more twinges.

I met with the senior m/w today to go through my previous birth notes. As expected it was all very distressing, still feel upset now, wasn't really at all cathartic either because it just reminded me what I could have in store for me in 9 weeks.

Anyway, the upside was that she said she was going to write to the consultant and recommend a section. I asked her what I should do next if he said no to doing one, and she said he wouldn't say no. I don't think I'll believe that though til I've been given a date, so another 3 weeks to wait.

Oh, and I reversed my car (which I've only had for 3 months) into a sign in the hospital carpark and dented my bumper. Not a great morning.

Off to vote soon!

Aw sophie, know what you mean about mad pregnancy dreams ive got them too, and SPD/PGP so no sleep for me the last 4 months! Never mind even less when baby arrives! LOL !

ealey - good luck with pre-op assessment - how exciting!

withorwithoutyou - so sorry you are having a crap time and that your app to go through your birth notes was not as helpful as it could have been. But the one positive is the M/W saying they wont refuse a section - thats unusual so it must mean something...even though my consultant agreed with me re: section all the midwives still say I should VB! So thats really positive for you.

Ive voted already - off to midwife appointment now!

Hi all, great thread, can I join? I'm not even pregnant the second time yet, but am thinking about having a second and definitely want an ELCS, but am scared I will get told no when it eventually happens. My birth wasn't as traumatic as most of yours, but after a pregnancy of being told everything was fine I was prepared for a water birth in a birthing centre and got there when my contractions were about 10mins apart. The MW just felt my belly and knew straight away it was breach so sent me back to my car to go to a main hospital to get scanned, we got there when I was 6 minutes apart and they told me it was breach and said they recommended and EMCS, which I had and was fine. Had loads of problems with feeding and when we came out of hospital my MW left me at home for 5 days before a visit by which point my DD had lost so much weight that she had to be admitted to the NICU (she was only 5lb when she was born so couldn't afford to lose much at all). Anyway she is now fine, but I have lost all faith in MWs whether in pregnancy, birth or after. The only people I have any faith in are the surgeons and nurses that performed my EMCS. In your first pregnancy I think you are naive and trusting and believe everything you are told, as I did, but now I know if I have a second I will not believe anything I am told by MWs. I don?t want the unknown next time I want to know exactly what is going to happen and to feel in control (or as in control as you can be in this situation.).

hiya, iam nearly 18 weeks got my consultant appointment at 20 weeks.

my mw says section is the best option for me, but untill the consultant says so and its in black and white then i wnt believe it.

she said well if he says no we will contest it and go to consulatant mw then another consulatnt if we have to, so she is behind me.

its funny as she said straight off go for vb then after 5 mins of talking to me she went full circle and said c-sect def best for u. (if only the choice was hers eh!!)

so what tests do the do on pre-op appointment?? do they also tell u horror stories to try and get u change ur mind?

withorwithoutyou i would say ur deff getting a c-sect after that, will u have to meet the consultant again or will they just write to u??

Hi mendipgirl, from what ive heard in RL and on these threads ELCS after EMCS is not usually a problem so hopefully you wont have too much trouble getting one - have you tried contacting the hospital where you had your DD and asking what the policy is? It might put your mind at rest for TTC? Anyway welcome to the thread!

That's a really good idea mookle, I hadn't even though of asking about their policy. I will do that.

Sophieandbelly at my preop two weeks ago, they give me all the information I need (leaflets about cs, aneasthetic etc), took swabs for MRSA, gave me my date and time, give me acid reflux tablets (I will need to take one at 10pm the night before and another at 6am the morning of the cs), explained the procedure, mentioned the cathetar and asked me to sign documentation to give my consent and to prove that they have been through all the dangers involved and worst case scenarios for example if i need a hysterectomy, cathetar due to bowel or bladder perforation etc. I remember signing consent forms when I had an emcs last time but I don't think it ws explained in quite as much detail! They also told me not to eat or drink anything from midnight the night before - not even a sip of water.

Hi sophieandbelly and mendipgirl. Sophie, that's really positive that your midwife is on your side and is prepared to fight your corner - it helps so much to have someone in the system working for you. Hopefully you can get some peace of mind in 2 weeks. And I'm sure it won't be a problem getting agreement to a elcs after a breech emcs. Withorwithoutyou, sorry you didn't find your appointment helpful, but if it got them on side then it was definitely worth it so well done you!

Just back from pre-op. It was all fine and rather mundane really. They did the usual blood pressure/blood tests etc., gave me some medication to take beforehand, and a really nice anaesthetist talked me through the pain relief options. I'll be having a spinal block which lasts around 2-3 hours, followed by some kind of suppository (nice - but at least they insert it during the op) which lasts around 18 hours and lots of paracetamol. They say if all goes well I should be out in about 48 hours, which would be an improvement on last time. I'll be either 2nd or 3rd, so there'll probably be a few hours of waiting around beforehand as I have to be there at 8am. I did wonder if anyone was going to talk me out of it but they didn't. The midwife and anaesthetist both asked why I was having it. When I told the midwife it was partly because the baby was an unstable lie she took one look at one my bump and agreed that it looked transverse which made me feel a bit better! My hubbie got a bit green around the gills when we were talking spinal blocks etc - I think he'll be more scared than me!

Ealey yes had mine but didn't speak to anyone about the aneasthetic (sp?) A spinal or epidural was mentioned but i'm not sure f I have to choose one or if they are both the same? Off to google!

Withorwithoutyou: you exactly describe the birth of my DC1, following hours and hours and hours of back-to-back labour with no pain relief. I felt as if I'd been in a severe car crash for weeks afterwards. DC2 was ELCS, and it was the best decision I ever made. Relatively painless, and instant bonding with DC2. Marvellous.

Ealey x posts! I too have to be at the hospital at 8am! Not sure where I am on the list! I have also have to go to the hospital for blood tests on Monday so that they can match my blood group! Nobody tried to talk me out of anything at the preop they just wanted to get the paper work filled in!

Hey 30ish, so we can be thinking of each other at 8 on Tuesday morning! I was told I could have a few sips of water with the medication, but that was it. I was only told that I was 2nd or 3rd because I asked (it depends if the woman who is 2nd goes into labour before then!). I'll be doing the paperwork on Tuesday. The anaesthetist said that spinals and epidurals feel much the same to the patient, the difference being that epidurals can be topped up for hours on end and spinals are one-offs that last a couple of hours. Because it's only a short operation they do a spinal at my hospital. I think it varies though?

Thanks for your post Antoinette, that's reassuring to hear. I must admit to having a bit of a wobble at the pre-op - suddenly being surrounded by a medicalised labour ward made it all feel a bit more scary, but deep down I feel it's the right decision. I hope I have as good an experience as you.

30ish and ealey - thanks for posting about the pre-op the info is really handy to know. Glad it all went smoothly for you...getting excited for you both now

Hello mendipgirl and welcome. I'm sorry to hear of your experience - that sounds very scary. I can relate to your mistrust of midwives, I feel the same unfortunately. I think you'll probably have a very good case for ELCS if you've already had one section.

I can totally understand you wanting to be in control too - that's one of my main issues, I don't want to take my chances this time, feel like I've done that once before and it didn't have a good outcome.

Sophie - that's great that your m/w is behind you. As an insider she's in a really good position to get you to speak to a sympathetic consultant and help you make your case for ELCS. I hope the next two weeeks goes by without too much stress. To answer your question, yes, I have an appt to see the consultant at 3 weeks - the main thing I'm worried about is him not being there and having to see a registrar instead, but I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

Antoinette - your post is really reassuring, thank you. It's always lovely to hear from ELCS graduates who had a good experience.

Ealey and 30ish that's useful advice about the pre-op, thanks.

mookle - thanks, I'm hoping that it's positive that the m/w was supportive. I haven't discussed any of this with my community m/w - dreading her attempting to talk me out of it!

I should go to bed, but can't tear myself away from the election.

Sorry I have taken so long to reply withorwithoutyou... BF was so much easier this time (not that it is ever easy)- milk came in 48 hours after birth, and I just kept buzzing whenever I needed baby passing to me during first afternoon and night. Pain relief is an issue if you plan to BF as I was told not to have anything other than PCM and Brufen.

Now then ladies, am getting a tad pissed off about 'my birth was not as traumatic as yours' comments! It is not a pissing contest! If it was traumatic for you, then it was traumatic. It is so easy to use this as yet another way of making ourselves feel bad. We do not need to be competitive about that!

DD2 is now 17 days old, and ELCS is just a pleasant memory. Worst thing for me was being apart from DD1 for the two nights. Photos are great this time - soo empathize with feelings around photos following traumatic birth.

I feel so about midwives and how they abuse their power (not all obviously). This time around I was still quite meek and mouse-like on the post-natal ward - I was terrified I would get in 'trouble' if I complained too much... esp in relation to pain relief. Even though just on pcm and brufen, my meds were late on more than one occasion, and pain was really unpleasant, and took a long time to get on top of again.

I am so glad this thread exists to help you guys, just it was not around for me

Hey, thanks for that stinkypinky, that's encouraging that you're milk only took 48 hours to come in.

Sorry your paind meds were late, that sounds rubbish. Should I put some paracetamol and ibuprofen in my hospital bag just in case do you reckon? Or is it different (stronger?) to the stuff you get over the counter?

SO glad you've got happy memories and photos from your ELCS

Do not take any meds with you, but make sure you have plenty to come home to. They are just the same as you buy over the counter, but best to leave it up to them to dispense and record meds given to avoid overdosing. pcm every 6 hours, brufen every 8 hours, even if it doesn't fit in with their meds rounds.

I sneaked in my arnica though, and wish I had managed to source peppermint cordial, as shoulder pain was horrid.

My milk took 5 days after DD1.

I'm worried about post op pain relief too - I'm popping paracetemol every few hours now to deal with sinusitus headaches .... really can't see how they can cope with abdominal surgery too! They only just dull the head pain.

Went and got my arnica tablets today from boots, and some handgel, small toothpaste and toothbrush .... really want to get a bag packed this weekend. Am only 34 weeks but I wouldn't hesitate to rush in if I thought things might be kicking off early.

It's one more way of taking control of the whole event!

LovetheSea talk to the anaesthetist and/or Surgeon prior to op so you know exactly what you can get. Different places have different policies. Do you plan to BF? as this will influence your options. I wish I had asked for Voltarol suppositories - had surgery before and they were fab.

I felt pain was manageable on my meds when given on time. There is some benefit to experiencing moderate pain as you are unlikely to overdo things. Unless you feel pain it is hard to not run around like a mad thing and do everything for you and yours.

Rather have a sore tummy than a sore fanny any day!

Don't worry about post-op pain. There really isn't that much of it. Pain medication is very effective and only really necessary the first two days, at which point your milk won't have come in anyway.

I agree with stinkypinky - sore tummy over sore fanny any day. I shudder when I remember the blinding torture that was the three weeks that followed DD's vaginal birth. In comparison, DS's elCS "pain" was very mild and short-lived.

God I'm shivering at the memory of episiotomy stitches + attempting to have a wee.

thanks for the info re pain meds stinkypinky - this is one of my concerns as was left for hours on end after episiotomy without pain relief and shouted at for crying in pain so was going to take pain killers in with me but fair point about recording meds and overdose. Can you have voltarol supps while breast feeding?