Sad/worried about c section /microbiome worries

[Rooandtwo]

Hello

So I feel like I’ve posted a lot recently as I have tried to cling to the hope of somehow getting to have a vaginal birth, or at least go into labour despite my baby presenting as breech at 38 weeks. Today I went for an attempted (but unsuccessful) ecv with who I believe was a very skilled consultant who was fantastic and has really helped me to start accepting that I will have a c section next week. He believes the reason the ecv failed may be due to a mildly heart shaped uterus or similar, and so I feel a little better just knowing that this is most likely a problem with me and not with the baby. I am not considering a vaginal breech birth because this is my first and I have found the evidence of increased risk in this department convincing.

One reason I think I’m struggling (abject fear of c section/cutting/surgery whilst awake aside) is that my mum had two very natural straightforward births with me and my brother. I’ve also spent time on hypnobirthing and a lot (in hindsight maybe too much) of research and now it feels like I can’t meet hardly any of the needs I have got into my head that my baby has. In particular, I’m so saddened by the research that suggests how a baby’s gut bacteria is compromised by c section and the time spent in hospital. I’m worried the recovery will compromise my ability to compensate for this loss, or to breast feed etc. I also know this is somewhat control freak/perfectionistic of me. I felt I could carry and birth my child largely independently and now to know I can’t do that has left me reeling.

I know all of this can be processed I’m just struggling to get there I suppose. It’s been a very tearful week. I hope this is my last support seeking post, it’s just become hard to find people who really understand. There’s a lot of ‘so long as the baby is healthy that’s all that matters’ noise around me, and I am of course so grateful for that and for the fact I have been able to carry my own child even. But this turn of events has really crushed my confidence so I still do sometimes worry something may be wrong. I also feel guilty for the ecv now it has been unsuccessful - but it felt that I had to do everything I could to get what I still feel would’ve been the baby’s best start in life. I have managed to accept that the experience of child birth was for me, and facing my fears of surgery is something I will of course do for the well-being of my baby, I am just still struggling to regain a comfortable perspective and not to feel so heartbroken at what, for me, feels like a lot of losses to what I hoped my child to have as an entry to the world.

I hope this makes sense to someone and doesn’t just sound like obsessive spiralling. As always, grateful for any replies. I really hope one day I’m someone who has supportive words to offer others here.

Hi, there’s actually some very recent papers not confirming any relationship with neonatal gut health and birth type. I’m a midwife and I remember a study day with the author of the original paper which prompted the vaginal seeding craze being very clear that that was a completely unintended consequence of his research and, he felt, massively distracted from the main outcome in his mind which was that ‘any breastfeed’ nearly completely negated the impact of birth mode on any measure of the neonatal microbiome completeness or health. So even one colostrum syringe which is something I achieve for all the c/a babies I are for if the mothers wishes (or they’re not latched on continuously for the first few hours after birth which is a surprisingly common occurrence!). Really embrace everything you’ve learned in your birth preparations and very good luck 😊

I’ve had 4 csections by choice and have breastfed all 4 children with absolutely no problems. My children aren’t sickly and the threads on here about how many illnesses or antibiotics children need when they start nursery always shock me as this has never been my experience.
4 very healthy c-section children here.

You don’t need to seed your baby. The bacteria you are worried about them not encountering are found in vast quantities in breast milk. I’m a senior lecturer microbiology and do a fair bit of microbiome related research.

Go easy on yourself. It's fine to grieve the birth you're not having, even if it's not rational. My first was a c-section because I had a complete placenta previa, so the c-section was well planned and 100% life saving and I was still devastated at not having the natural birth I hoped for, even though my baby wouldn't have survived it. If it helps, me and my kiddo have a great bond, breastfed for ages and he never gets sick. So the birth is only one small component of all the things that go to making up a healthy and happy mother and baby. Good luck with the section and your new baby and let yourself be sad. But don't do what I did and read loads of natural birth stories to make you feel even worse.

I did hypnobirthing and had an emergency c section in the end - but still found the hypno prep reassuring and helpful to keep calm. So that bit may not be wasted!

I completely get where you're coming from. I was induced and it wasn't progressing so it was decided I'd have a c section. I was so upset. Like you my mum had natural births but always after being induced and has always (unhelpfuly) told me I've got child baring hips and thighs. I was also really worried about the breastfeexinf after. All your worries I had.

It went SO well and I'm planning another! I finally had my debrief last week (16 months later) and it was good to talk things through.

there's a lot of stigma around sections and I'm still sad I didn't have a natural birth but I can't say anything bad about the section.., the recovery is hard but some of my friends have had huge tears and haven't been able to sit down so it's swings and roundabouts!

Oh and absolutely no problems breastfeeding. DD got it straight away and my milk came in right on time.

With the knowledge you now have, baby is breech and cesarean is the safest method of delivery, I would focus on the practical things. Can you start expressing colostrum to build a supply which will get you through the first day or two before your milk comes in. I think this will also encourage your milk supply which can be delayed after a section. What can you organise to ensure you have the best nutrition after the birth? can you meal prep and freeze some nutritious food or get ingredients in for healthy smoothies to easily make in the hazy first few weeks which can help your recovery. Rather than reading reams of info online about things you have less control over now please try to focus on practical things that can help. One or two last pregnancy yoga sessions, relaxing baths, naps when you can. Try to relax and enjoy these last few days with bump and good luck for the birth.