Unable to see my baby in NICU due to covid restrictions

[francesca26]

I feel so alone I needed to post this to see if anyone else has been or is in a similar situation.

I have been in hospital since 30/12 for a scheduled induction. The process didn't start until 31/12 due to how busy they were and I was on a ward with several other women. One of these women tested positive for covid on 31/12 just as my contractions started and I was informed that I had been 'exposed'. I didn't think too much of it at this point and was just focusing on birthing my baby.

At 17.57pm on 01/01/22 my son was born at 38+4 . He had breathing difficulties and was 'grunty' so was taken straight to NICU, I had a brief cuddle but hardly any skin to skin.

The NICU doctor then informed me that because I had been 'exposed' that I would not be able to visit my son in NICU at all, even though I was testing negative. 💔

It has now been over 24hrs since I gave birth and I have had no contact with my baby. I have been put in a segregated room on the post natal ward. I'm not allowed to leave and can't have any visitors.

My heart is honestly breaking. I also have a 2 year old at home who I haven't seen for 4 days now.

Baby is improving and although he is still on oxygen, the levels are much better than they were. However I've not got any time frame on when they think he will be able to be moved up to post natal and be with me.

I feel like this is really affecting my mental health. I know my baby is in the best place but I am being treated like I have covid, even though I am negative and double jabbed.

I just don't know what to do with myself. I'm stuck in this room, without either of my children and I can't leave unless I discharge myself which they have advised me not to do incase baby is able to move up at some point.

😢💔

I can't believe there's nothing that can be done for you to be able to see your baby OP. People are saying you can't stay in the side room because there wouldn't be a toilet - but you've been testing negative for days, why can you not visit the side room for a couple of hours? In PPE for the walk from one from room to the other if needed. Any of the staff could have been unknowingly infected and pose more risk than you.

What shit times we are living in where no one finds a way for a mother to be able to see her new born baby. Mind you NHS maternity services are not fit for purpose and haven't been for a long time, 15 years ago when I gave birth I ended up getting an independent midwife as the 'care' was so awful - it was so totally different with an independent midwife I really cannot recommend them enough. The NHS is about ticking boxes and avoiding getting sued, there is no interest in common sense or treating people as individuals.

I really hope someone sorts this out for you today OP.

Covid or not this is surely kidnap

Seriously? Do some posters not even think for a second before they post?

It's more harmful for the baby to be separated from its mother providing the baby doesn't contract and die from covid. There is also the possibility that covid could be taken into the Nicu risking other babies not just in relation to covid but from essential care in the event that key staff catch it.

The op's baby had breathing problems - not a good combination with covid.

The risks of a covid related issue and the potential impact on those around you have to be weighed against you not seeing your baby for a week. In the kindest possible way op, some parents whose babies spend time in the nicu are separated permanently from their babies or from the child/young person they hoped they would grow up to be.

This is a blip. Have some counselling if you need it but be thankful that in probably less than a week you will be going home with your baby. Meanwhile make the most of having rare rest after giving birth and get yourself into a fit and healthy place to look after your baby.

Congratulations BTW.

I work in a hospital and omicron is causing even more problems than the previous variants. It’s spreading across wards including non covid ( patients tested before hand in admission but then become a later positive day/two later by which time they’ve spread it to others or the staff It’s causing outbreaks everywhere). It’s very contagious and despite apparently according to media mild it’s causing some very sick people still.

I’m not saying this situation is right at all and I’m so sorry that people are being put in awful situations across the hospitals when it comes to visiting and being with loved ones. It’s hideous. Trust me staff hate it too.

However we are damned if we do and damed if we don’t. Can you imagine if an outbreak in NICU was traced back and babies got even sicker or died. There would be an uproar. Maybe This situation can be reviewed if the op doesn’t test positive on a pcr?

Also NHS staff can’t all go to work with a household contact, in my trust if you work in a very vulnerable area with patient contact like NICU you can’t. There are risk assessments to do to consider the risk of that staff member and the area they work.

I think it’s a case of being cruel to be kind. A covid outbreak on nicu would be a tragedy. I think NICU have the strictest rules if all wards as there are babies hanging onto life by a thread. Hope you are reunited with baby soon and then you will have the rest of your lives together.

@Dollywilde

I would be asking where baby would be if baby were testing positive, and ask them to move baby there so you can both be considered ‘potential positives’ together rather than baby a negative and you a potential positive. Newborn and mum should be treated as one IMO.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, it must be horrendous.

The baby is in NICU- the mother can't go there. The baby had/has breathing difficulties and needs oxygen- are you seriously suggesting they move the baby into a potential covid positive room or a potential covid positive person into a NICU ?

How are we nearly 2 years on and NICUs still have no contingency plan for situations such as this other than to ban the mother from seeing the baby? The OP can't be the only one in this situation yet as someone due to give birth in the next month it is a situation that never crossed my mind as being a possibility. I'd contact your local paper, not necessarily all guns blazing but people need to be aware of what is happening,
What I don't get is if the OP was testing positive she would be able to end her isolation on day 7 if she had 2 negative LFT. She however is not allowed to end her isolation until day 10 despite the fact she isn't even positive. I'm presuming she's double jabbed, if she was on the outside world this would mean she wouldn't need to isolate at all am I missing something here?

It’s hard OP, but I was 3 days before I could see my preemie daughter when she was born. I had a c-section and was unable to get out of bed. Then when she was in for her second of 7 weeks, my husband got norovirus and we had to stay out of the unit for 48 hours (even though I wasn’t unwell) In her 4th week I had to stay away because I had a cold.

Protection of these extremely vulnerable babies is vital. People need to understand that. Units have to follow IC guidelines and these will always err on the side of caution.

I'm not one for kicking up stinks but I'd make an exception for this. It is a health emergency for mothers and newborns to not be close.

It happens for many reasons and isn’t a health emergency.

It's more harmful for baby to be separated from you than the potential exposure to covid given you're testing negative!!

This comment is more harmful to mothers who are separated from their babies in NNiUC. Please be more careful when making silly statements like this.

Theories around attachment are all well and good but when these theories are applied to babies in NNICU, any theoretical benefit often comes at a real risk to the babies. All this “it’s so important to do…..” rattled round my head when my baby was fighting for her life in NNICU and it added a layer of pressure and guilt to me that was entirely unnecessary. NNICU mothers are more at risk from PND and this narrative contributes to that.

If your baby is stable you could ask them to bring baby to your room to visit? Seems extreme to me.

@Rainbowbrite2022 my sympathies. It's a particularly difficult combination at the moment because Omicron is so infectious, and patient tolerance of restrictions is so much lower than it was at the start of the pandemic.

All our patients are asked about covid symptoms/contacts twice before coming into the building, and then a further time by the clinical team treating them. That's three screening checks. But we're still having patients where it comes to light during their treatment that they're waiting on a PCR or someone in the family has covid. We're aerosol generating, so that causes a whole load of extra stress and cleanup for everyone.

We also ask all patients to self-isolate before GA, but a cursory read of threads here makes it clear that plenty of people aren't doing so. Which, again, has knock on for other patients who are put at risk. Just as the OP has been.

I agree with you: damned if you do and damned if you don't. It's just not possible with current hospital design and overload on the service to keep all patients seperate. So, with disease levels so prevalent in the community, hospital-acquired infection is inevitable. And, in somewhere like NICU, potentially devastating.

OP: congratulations on your beautiful baby boy. This must be heartbreaking for you. But it is only a few days and you'll be taking your new son home. Try and focus on that?

*I’d contact your local paper, not necessarily all guns blazing but people need to be aware of what is happening.

Don’t do this. It will solve nothing and only add stress and pressure to the staff and parents in the unit. If you genuinely want to raise it, use the appropriate channels for complaint. But in this situation your baby is being well cared for, is not at risk. They also can’t stop you from leaving. If you want to be home, ask to be discharged.

I'm presuming she's double jabbed, if she was on the outside world this would mean she wouldn't need to isolate at all confused am I missing something here?

Yeah - you're missing that the outside world isn't full of desperately premature babies, reliant on all the powers of medical science to survive, and for whom the slightest sniffle could be lethal.

I was sick for nearly a year after I had my baby. I didn’t see them for 4 months. I was unconscious in ICU.

I then spent another 7 months in hospital recovering. So I do understand

For those saying it’s a human emergency. Or whatever. My and my child are as close as a mother and child. No problems bonding.

There are things that do happen to some parents and the child turns out fine. As horrid as it is for both. Hope this helps reassure you.

@Neurodiversitydoctor

)In this case I agree that although morally its absolutely deplorable its unlikely to result in a successful case. However absolutely there are instances where suing the trust is proportionatde Of course in cases of gross medical negligence no one is disputing that. The most that has happened here is that someone has misinterpreted infection control procedures and erred too far on the side of caution, over a bank holiday weekend when the nation recorded it's highest ever number of Covid cases. Of course the HCPs should be showing OP compassion , but I don't think being aggressive and combatative is helpful here.

I don't think its "aggressive" to want to know what the plan is for new mothers separated from their babies. We have had the pandemic for nearly two years now, some trusts have really stepped up others less so.

The problem is not the obvious need for infection control in NICU but the apparent lack of communication or any other support in place for the new mother who is isolated in a room.

Its this lack of communication which is at the root of many complaints which are not "gross negligence". Too often its the only way to get anyone to talk to you.

OP: Has anyone talked to you about trying to express milk if you can, maybe seeing pictures or any other support available to new mothers in your situation?

I was separated from my eldest whilst in special care and me bedbound and it was a miserable time but at least my DH could see the baby and report back. What options have been suggested by staff to help you look forward and plan for when you can hold your baby?

[quote OnceuponaRainbow18]@Neurodiversitydoctor

I’m so glad you’re an ex nicu doctor, you sounds soulless[/quote]
@OnceuponaRainbow18

I haven’t even made it through the whole thread but your comment os disgusting. Shame on you.

@rainydogday

If your baby is stable you could ask them to bring baby to your room to visit? Seems extreme to me.

The baby is in NICU because he is a sick baby....newborn babies can dip very quickly......his life would be at risk by moving him....surely you would not be so selfish to put your child’s life at risk just to satisfy your own wants?

OP, email the Director of Nursing/Chief Nursing Officer for the Trust - name will be on the website, most likely in the About Us/Trust Board section. Email most likely to be firstname.surname@whatever is on any of the general Trust info email addresses. If you can find the name of their deputy, cc them too. They will be very concerned to hear what is happening to you and of anyone will be in a position to do something about it quickly in case the guidance has been misinterpreted or applied overly heavy handedly by the division/ward.

I don't know which Trust you're in but at mine our DoN would absolutely want to at the very least swiftly investigate this and assure herself that the right thing is being done on balance. And it wouldn't be about 'blaming' any of the ward staff or anyone getting into trouble if it's incorrect.

I hope you're with your baby soon, my heart absolutely goes out to you.

Francesca26 I’m so sorry for you and your poor family having to go through this. I hope your baby continues to improve and you are all at home together soon ❤️

I do think it’s proportionate not to expose NICU babies to covid contacts where known and avoidable. I say this as someone who’s full term 6 week old ended up in the children’s ward unable to eat or breathe properly just from bronchiolitis. I would imagine the risks of covid to underdeveloped lungs could be much more catastrophic. That doesn’t make any of this easier for you though.
I think the advice to see if anyone can bring you some baby clothes/towels that smell like your baby might be worth trying. FaceTimes with both of your children if that’s possible?

this is an absolute disgrace.
Are all nurses and doctors seriously isolating outside of work? No, they’re out living their life possibly rubbing shoulders with covid positive people daily (albeit unbeknown to them).

The mother is testing negative- she needs to see that baby.

Oh god how difficult!
I couldnt see my baby for nearly a day after my first birth and i remember it being such a primal need to be with him. You must be going mad

I'm so sorry op, must be heartbreaking not to be with your baby. I follow someone on Instagram who tested positive (they admitted they mucked up testing- I think continuing to test her beyond day 10 so she was obviously still showing positive) and then her daughter went into nicu. She met her daughter for the first time in a car park after the hospital discharged her to a family member or friend. Her story was published if you Google it I'm sure you'll find it.

I think she recommends speaking to PALS. Also if her daughter had been positive for covid she would of been segregated which suggests there was room for her to be with her daughter.

How close was your contact? Are we talking same ward and no face to face interaction with this positive case?

How heartbreaking for you 💔
I hope your baby is doing okay and getting stronger.

I believe the new rules mean you only have to isolate for 7 days if you test negative, so 3 more days to wait - it’s hard but just keep focusing on that.
Thank God dad can still see them, see what’s happening and send you photos etc

Have they said when your baby can leave to go home?
Hopefully it won’t be too long and then you can spend lots of time together.

I disagree with those saying to complain. OPs baby is already very vulnerable and she’d never forgive herself if she bent the rules because she complained and then the baby got worse.

I am so sorry you’re going through this OP. It must be so so difficult and I am honestly so sad for you. It must feel like torture and I can’t imagine your pain.

However, the risk needs to be balanced against the pros. NICU is full of very very sick babies that the smallest of infections can be fatal. It’s not just your baby they need to think about, but all the other babies. As much as PPs here are saying that all hell would break lose if they were in your shoes, I’m sure all hell would again break lose if they were the parent of a critically ill baby who caught covid.

You’re doing LFTs but maybe worth asking if doing PCRs would make a difference and reduce the amount of time you’re apart.

I wish you the best OP, and you will see your baby soon!

Thats just awful. I gave birth 29th March 2020 just a week into first lockdown and when no one had any idea what covid would do. Lots of issues and was a section as baby had health issues and no one knew if hed survive delivery. He did and was in nicu. This was a sunday. I was discharged 30 miles home on the tue and he was kept in. That same day my mum whod been at my house came down with symptoms. I was told couldnt visit for 10 days. It was horrific and even the nurses were crying telling me on the phone as baby was possibly getting brain surgery. A neighbour appealed to local mp on my behalf and i got rhe first pcr test in the area. Once negative i could visit so thankfully only 2 days. I had to drive 8 days after section cos no one allowed to give lifts and not allowed into hospital if used public transport. The whole thing was just heart breaking and i was lucky baby stabilised. The nicu nurses were great and sent me photos and videos as often as they could.

@Snowwhite83

It is not true that nhs staff cannot work if close contact. See guidance updared 31/12/21 Updated UK Health Security Agency guidance on NHS staff, student and volunteer self-isolation and return to work following COVID-19 contact which states fully vaccinated staff can return to work given they have a negative pcr and are fully vaccinated and thry do an lft daily. I would kick up a stink OP.

This, although some places in England were already doing that. DN is a hospital nurse and worked 5 days with negative LFT after her partner tested positive - she tested positive Xmas Eve.