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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Unable to see my baby in NICU due to covid restrictions

317 replies

francesca26 · 03/01/2022 06:11

I feel so alone I needed to post this to see if anyone else has been or is in a similar situation.

I have been in hospital since 30/12 for a scheduled induction. The process didn't start until 31/12 due to how busy they were and I was on a ward with several other women. One of these women tested positive for covid on 31/12 just as my contractions started and I was informed that I had been 'exposed'. I didn't think too much of it at this point and was just focusing on birthing my baby.

At 17.57pm on 01/01/22 my son was born at 38+4 . He had breathing difficulties and was 'grunty' so was taken straight to NICU, I had a brief cuddle but hardly any skin to skin.

The NICU doctor then informed me that because I had been 'exposed' that I would not be able to visit my son in NICU at all, even though I was testing negative. 💔

It has now been over 24hrs since I gave birth and I have had no contact with my baby. I have been put in a segregated room on the post natal ward. I'm not allowed to leave and can't have any visitors.

My heart is honestly breaking. I also have a 2 year old at home who I haven't seen for 4 days now.

Baby is improving and although he is still on oxygen, the levels are much better than they were. However I've not got any time frame on when they think he will be able to be moved up to post natal and be with me.

I feel like this is really affecting my mental health. I know my baby is in the best place but I am being treated like I have covid, even though I am negative and double jabbed.

I just don't know what to do with myself. I'm stuck in this room, without either of my children and I can't leave unless I discharge myself which they have advised me not to do incase baby is able to move up at some point.

😢💔

OP posts:
Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 06:46

Yes 2 of my own and case load of 1,500.

HippyMoon · 03/01/2022 06:46

@anon12345678901 sorry, OP's wishes?! Do you know anything about early attachment?

user1958493 · 03/01/2022 06:46

I'm so sorry this has happened. You have my full sympathies. I can imagine every second is painful.

Could you try to view it as your baby is being kept safe as you could possibly have covid?

What is your babies name?

And congratulations

HippyMoon · 03/01/2022 06:47

I'm so sorry OP this is absolutely heartwrenching. I'd be kicking up a stink too tbh. Mums and newborns really shouldn't be separated.

Mummyoflittledragon · 03/01/2022 06:47

What has that got to do with it

A lot. I totally get the reasoning and guidelines. But could never have understood the heart wrenching pain of being separated from your child, especially a newborn.

I am so sorry op. Your pain will be over soon. Flowers

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 06:47

Sorry case load of 150

anon12345678901 · 03/01/2022 06:48

[quote HippyMoon]@anon12345678901 sorry, OP's wishes?! Do you know anything about early attachment?[/quote]
Yes I do. But this is about what's best for all the babies not just OP. If your baby was in the NICU I'm sure you wouldn't want a Covid close contact in there with them.

Original poster
francesca26 · 03/01/2022 06:49

I was first exposed to this person on 30.12.21 so I am told it will be counted from that day. Originally I was told 7 days as I am double jabbed, but NICU have said this morning it will be 10 days. (apparently this is coming from the top management / government guidelines) So that's potentially a whole week before I will be able to see my baby, if he stays in NICU that long.
As I said in my original post, I understand that baby's in NICU are incredibly vulnerable but my baby is in a side room, because of the fact I was exposed! So I would be in the room with just him if they allowed me to go.
I have no indication of how long he will be there for (I understand that things change hourly) but that he is on high flow oxygen and so it is something he will need to be weaned off.

If I discharge myself to be with my daughter, then I risk not being able to see my baby until next Monday unless he is discharged before.
If I stay, he might be able to move up to be with me in the next few days but it definitely won't be today.
I am so torn.
I have asked the midwife on shift if I can at least leave my room and go and get some fresh air today, as staying in this room alone for much longer is going to drive me insane.

OP posts:
Snowwhite83 · 03/01/2022 06:51

It is not true that nhs staff cannot work if close contact.
See guidance updared 31/12/21 Updated UK Health Security Agency guidance on NHS staff, student and volunteer self-isolation and return to work following COVID-19 contact which states fully vaccinated staff can return to work given they have a negative pcr and are fully vaccinated and thry do an lft daily. I would kick up a stink OP.

Simonjt · 03/01/2022 06:52

@Dollywilde

I would be asking where baby would be if baby were testing positive, and ask them to move baby there so you can both be considered ‘potential positives’ together rather than baby a negative and you a potential positive. Newborn and mum should be treated as one IMO.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, it must be horrendous.

You would willing expose your unwell newborn who needs NICU care to a respiratory illness?
Snowwhite83 · 03/01/2022 06:52

Say you are making a formal complaint op and they may change their tune.

Original poster
francesca26 · 03/01/2022 06:53

Also my partner (baby's dad) is allowed to visit as long as his lateral flow is negative every day, which is something I know. I am just longing to be close to my baby. Face time is not the same.

OP posts:
Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 06:53

Honestly OP my heart goes out to you, as I said earlier hopefully they will swab you tommorow and you can be with your baby or he/she will recover enough for you to be in a side room together very soon. 💐 Sorry to derail your thread

Whingasaurus · 03/01/2022 06:54

This is shameful treatment utterly shameful.

Snowwhite83 · 03/01/2022 06:56

Technically the NICU nurse looking after your baby could have a partner at home with covid and still be allowed into work so I don't really see how OP is any different especially as she is testing negative.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 06:57

I apologise I have been on leave and didn't see the new guidence. I do wonder though if they might try to prevent close contacts from doing face to face work with vunerable patients, but obviously that would be for infection control in each trust.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 06:58

Are you doing daily LFTs OP ?

gerispringer · 03/01/2022 07:00

So sorry to hear this. 35 years ago I had an EC, was quite sick and baby was in SCU . I couldn’t see him as I was too unwell. Fortunately my husband could see him and report back . I spent 3 days crying. I think I was wheelchaired to see him on about day 4. He was eventually brought to me on about day 6 and after 10 days we went home. It was a horrible feeling not knowing how my baby was and not being able to feed him . I did eventually successfully breastfeed him for 12 months and now he’s a lovely lad with 2 gorgeous DC of his own. I do feel for you OP, but you are both safe and getting better - can your partner see him?

KiloWhat · 03/01/2022 07:00

As I said in my original post, I understand that baby's in NICU are incredibly vulnerable but my baby is in a side room, because of the fact I was exposed! So I would be in the room with just him if they allowed me to go.

Well this makes even less sense they won't let you in :( I'm so sorry. I would speak to them again and ask them to explain exactly why. If your partner can go in with negative LFTs I don't understand why you can't.

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/01/2022 07:01

Newborn and mum should be treated as one IMO.

This. For many reasons.

pudseypie · 03/01/2022 07:03

Gosh I really feel for you. I was separated from my DS when he was born as he was sent to a children's hospital in the next county whilst I was recovering from emcs complications in my local hospital for another 5 days.
When I was released though I saw just what stringent measures are in place to keep nicu safe for all the babies, and that was pre covid. I can understand why they have those measures in place in the current climate but also see how hard it must be for you. My dh stayed with our ds, and I stayed on my own. So I felt some comfort that ds wasn't alone. I really hope you are reunited soon.

moregarlic · 03/01/2022 07:04

This is truly shameful and shows how insane we have become. OP I am so sorry you’re going through this, it’s inhumane.

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/01/2022 07:04

You would willing expose your unwell newborn who needs NICU care to a respiratory illness?

She may well also 'expose' the baby to breast milk. Which is designed for the baby's needs, including immunity.

Sonex · 03/01/2022 07:05

It's been four days now, can't they do a PCR test on you and baby now? So hard I know but while he needs oxygen they can't risk him getting covid. You are doing the best thing for him.

DropYourSword · 03/01/2022 07:05

@MrsTerryPratchett

You would willing expose your unwell newborn who needs NICU care to a respiratory illness?

She may well also 'expose' the baby to breast milk. Which is designed for the baby's needs, including immunity.

You’ve taken that comment completely out of context!